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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: microcenter employee ()
Date: September 10, 2022 04:39PM

Football Party Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Furman is going to have another party Sunday
> afternoon to watch the Commanders play
> Jacksonville. He said everyone is invited but to
> bring a covered dish or a bag of seeds. No
> freeloaders!

Last year at this time a 32 inch flat screen disappeared off the loading dock. Surveillance video revealed that the device was carried away by roughly 12 squirrels. I am pretty sure it was Furman and some friends. I just wonder how they got power to it.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Engineering Squirrel ()
Date: September 10, 2022 11:11PM

Furman and his friends are very smart when it comes to electricity and has it hooked up in no time. Why do you think they are able to run on electric wires without electrocuting themselves

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Stanley Skunk ()
Date: September 11, 2022 12:23AM

Not just electricity, Furman and his team are experts in just about everything, that’s why he will never be outsmarted by the Russian agents who are out to destroy him.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Woodlands update ()
Date: September 11, 2022 10:31PM

Furmans Sunday afternoon party is still going on, although several attendees have passed out, and the booze is almost gone.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: I had to leave ()
Date: September 12, 2022 09:46PM

I hung out at Furman’s party until halftime but I was getting too drunk and decided to leave while I could still drive. I heard the strippers didn’t get there until midway through the fourth quarter

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Well Hung squirrel ()
Date: September 12, 2022 10:07PM

I had to leave Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I hung out at Furman’s party until halftime but
> I was getting too drunk and decided to leave while
> I could still drive. I heard the strippers
> didn’t get there until midway through the fourth
> quarter

The strippers were late but it was worth the wait. Stormy Squirrel, the hottest one, gave me a great bj.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: I heard ()
Date: September 12, 2022 10:18PM

Stormy Squirrel has big old squirrel titties

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Trump Turtle ()
Date: September 13, 2022 01:46AM

The Russian stripper, Svetlana Squirrel, peed on me.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Hunter Biden Squirrel Friend ()
Date: September 14, 2022 09:53PM

Hunter brought by some meth and some Russian hookers but we chased him off. We squirrels are Americans and don’t want those bastards around

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Tommy Tapawingo ()
Date: September 15, 2022 01:00PM

News alert, Furman is back in Vienna. Someone gave him a whole meal. Saw him sitting behind Madison McDonalds eating a Big Mac, fries and a coke.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Rodent ranger ()
Date: September 15, 2022 04:45PM

Squirrels can travel up to 10 miles a day and I have reason to believe that Furman frequents the W&OD trail. Would that trail get him from the Pan-Am area to downtown Vienna?

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Long Distance ()
Date: September 15, 2022 09:12PM

Forman is actually training for the Marine Corps Marathon and can travel much further than 10 miles a day. I saw him running on the W&OD in Leesburg a week or so ago. He stopped and asked me if there was a McDonald’s right off the trail, but I pointed him to the 7-11 instead so he wouldn’t have to cross traffic

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Larry Loudoun ()
Date: September 15, 2022 11:37PM

There is a Roy Rogers right off the trail in Leesburg, I wonder if he likes Roy Rogers.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Lenny Leesburg ()
Date: September 17, 2022 12:43AM

I saw Furman at the Safeway in Leesburg during the summer. He had his running shoes on and was buying a bottle of water. Hydration is very important to Furman

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Gertrude Grounhog ()
Date: September 17, 2022 01:32AM

When Furman is exercising he does stay hydrated and drink water, but when he is partying he enjoys his Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, Jamesons and Budweiser.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Teddy Tapawingo ()
Date: September 17, 2022 09:58AM

I saw Furman sprinting down Tapawingo early this morning. He was dressed in a bright orange safety vest and reflective running shoes and carrying a bottle of water. Furman is always thinking about safety

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furmange ()
Date: September 17, 2022 10:09AM

Teddy Tapawingo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I saw Furman sprinting down Tapawingo early this
> morning. He was dressed in a bright orange safety
> vest and reflective running shoes and carrying a
> bottle of water. Furman is always thinking about
> safety

When Furman gets to chewing on those pot plants that the guy at Providence hall apartments grows on his deck Furman starts running around like he is half crazy so the safety vest is a good idea.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Wally Warning ()
Date: September 17, 2022 10:14AM

Furman better be be careful hanging around Vienna, the degenerates from VGH might try to lure him into their den of sin.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furman can handle himself ()
Date: September 17, 2022 09:14PM

Furman is not worried about the men at VGH. He can hold his own in a fight and is famous for taking on seven Russian squirrels at the same time and kicking their asses

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Glendon Glen ()
Date: September 17, 2022 10:14PM

Furman can handle himself Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Furman is not worried about the men at VGH. He can
> hold his own in a fight and is famous for taking
> on seven Russian squirrels at the same time and
> kicking their asses


Mike Mattress, Vinnie Vienna and Tommy Tapawingo might be able to overpower Furman and gang plow him.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Kung Fu Squirrel ()
Date: September 17, 2022 11:17PM

Furman is a sixth degree black belt and an expert with the nunchucks. Those three don’t stand a chance against such a formidable opponent

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Slut attack ()
Date: September 18, 2022 02:39AM

The only person who could defeat Furman is Cottage Connie. The stench from her nasty snatch would knock him out.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Early AM Jogger ()
Date: September 18, 2022 08:23AM

This morning I saw Furman jogging around the PanAm parking lot. There were three squirrels jogging behind him. They looked like Secret Service squirrels because they had sunglasses on and were wearing earpieces

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Detective Dan ()
Date: September 18, 2022 09:38AM

If he has secret service protection now, he must really be on a top secret mission for the government.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: FawGet about it. ()
Date: September 18, 2022 03:24PM

Lo's is closed since they wouldn't pay protection to Furman and squad.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Morning update ()
Date: September 19, 2022 08:00AM

Just saw Furman behind IHOP eating pancakes, eggs and sausage.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Vienna Inner ()
Date: September 20, 2022 08:16PM

Furman was at Vienna Inn this afternoon, having some chili dogs and fries. I bought him a Budweiser too but he said he would only have one because he was driving.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Vienna Vice Mayor ()
Date: September 21, 2022 05:07AM

He had more than one drink, because he is currently passed out on the sidewalk in front of the Vienna Inn.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Are you sure? ()
Date: September 21, 2022 08:22PM

Vienna Vice Mayor Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> He had more than one drink, because he is
> currently passed out on the sidewalk in front of
> the Vienna Inn.


That doesn’t sound like Furman to get drunk in the middle of the afternoon Maybe he got hit by a car.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Greg Grasshopper ()
Date: September 21, 2022 09:31PM

Are you sure? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Vienna Vice Mayor Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > He had more than one drink, because he is
> > currently passed out on the sidewalk in front
> of
> > the Vienna Inn.
>
>
> That doesn’t sound like Furman to get drunk in
> the middle of the afternoon Maybe he got hit by a
> car.

Furmans been drinking a lot lately, anytime of day, he might need to start attending AA meetings.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Mistaken Identity ()
Date: September 21, 2022 10:44PM

I think you may have seen Furman’s cousin, Bushytail. They are hard to tell apart , but Bushy is a complete derelict. He also watches porn all day and plays with his nuts

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Tony Corleone Squirrel ()
Date: September 22, 2022 02:47AM

I was in the slammer with Bushytail a few years ago. Good dude. He was framed. Didn’t do nothing. Forget about it.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Safeway Shopper ()
Date: September 29, 2022 07:27PM

Tonight as I was leaving Safeway with a cart full of groceries I saw Furman. He offered to help me load my car if I gave him a piece of fried chicken. I took him up on his offer because I bought a lot of groceries

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Drumstick Dirk ()
Date: September 29, 2022 09:38PM

Safeway Shopper Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Tonight as I was leaving Safeway with a cart full
> of groceries I saw Furman. He offered to help me
> load my car if I gave him a piece of fried
> chicken. I took him up on his offer because I
> bought a lot of groceries


Furman loves chicken.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Microcenter Sighting ()
Date: October 01, 2022 11:41PM

I saw Furman leaving Microcenter with several memory cards. Apparently they were for his camera so he could take more surveillance photos of those no good Russian squirrels

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Vladimir Rodenthof ()
Date: October 02, 2022 12:47AM

We will kill capitalist pig rodent soon, after we finish wiping out Ukraine.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Rainy Days ()
Date: October 02, 2022 09:56AM

I just got home from a trip to Safeway to stock up on beer for the football game. Saw Furman walking across the parking lot with an umbrella. He doesn’t like getting his fur wet because it becomes matted. I rolled a can of Old Milwaukee over to him and he picked it up, threw it under his arm and ran off, chattering happily. I swear I saw him do a Heisman pose with it before he disappeared into the woods

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Wes Worm ()
Date: October 02, 2022 07:09PM

Thanks for giving Furman a can of Old Milwaukee, but he prefers Budweiser. Try to give him Bud next time.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: professional squirrel hunter ()
Date: October 02, 2022 07:19PM

I favor the 338 lapua magnum when I hunt squirrels...Its adequate but I can never find them afterwards.
Attachments:
xtsp33803.jpg

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Elusive Furman ()
Date: October 02, 2022 09:08PM

Many squirrel hunters have come and gone yet Furman still lives. Your idle threats don’t scare him.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Agent Hedgehog ()
Date: October 02, 2022 09:21PM

Furman has survived all kinds of attacks, even the full force of Russian secret elite death squads.He will survive anything.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: squirrlygirly ()
Date: October 02, 2022 11:00PM

nuts4nuts
Attachments:
1Im5.gif
Squirrel+warfare+_70472a_3482.jpg
Super Squirrel.jpg

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: New spotting ()
Date: October 04, 2022 12:10PM

Just saw Furman walking out of Madison McDonalds munching on a Big Mac and fries.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Busy Squirrel ()
Date: October 04, 2022 06:19PM

I saw him at Whole Foods this afternoon sipping on a kombucha. He likes some variety rather than drinking Bud Light all the time

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Maple Mitch ()
Date: October 05, 2022 02:24PM

Furman is back on the booze, just saw him stumbling out of the Vienna Inn, he could barely walk.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Was it Bushytail? ()
Date: October 05, 2022 11:12PM

Furman has been on the wagon for six months now. Are you sure it wasn’t Bushytail, his cousin? What a derelict

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Convict Cat burgler ()
Date: October 05, 2022 11:30PM

Was it Bushytail? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Furman has been on the wagon for six months now.
> Are you sure it wasn’t Bushytail, his cousin?
> What a derelict


It couldn’t have been Bushytail, because he is back in prison at Allenwood rodent top security facility.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: In the slam ()
Date: October 06, 2022 09:46PM

I just got out yesterday. Bushytail was released earlier this week on good behavior and told me he was heading back to Virginia and going on a rampage

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Sheriff Roscoe P Coltrane ()
Date: October 06, 2022 10:46PM

In the slam Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I just got out yesterday. Bushytail was released
> earlier this week on good behavior and told me he
> was heading back to Virginia and going on a
> rampage


Thanks for the heads up. We will be on high alert.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: No one is safe ()
Date: October 06, 2022 10:48PM

When Bushytail gets a wild hair up his ass, no one is safe. He’s a wild animal!

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Wes Rabbit, news reporter ()
Date: October 07, 2022 02:36AM

Watch out northern Virginia, reports are coming in that Bushytail carjacked a Honda Pilot and is speeding and driving recklessly down route 15.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Had an accomplice ()
Date: October 07, 2022 08:27PM

Bushytail had an accomplice in the carjacking, a large chipmunk with nuts in his mouth, who goaded Bushytail into this dastardly deed. Fortunately they were stopped by the state police in a roadblock and are in jail tonight facing multiple charges. With Bushytail record he will be facing hard time.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Fredo Bullfrog ()
Date: October 07, 2022 11:25PM

I saw the state police dragging Bushytail into the state police holding center, he vowed that if he goes back to Allenwood he will break out.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Warden Warthog ()
Date: October 09, 2022 01:12AM

Bushytail is safely back at Allenwood.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Willie Warhawk ()
Date: October 11, 2022 07:56AM

Just saw Furman hanging around WaWa looking for some food to grab.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Lucky 7’s ()
Date: October 13, 2022 09:54PM

I saw Furman standing outside the 7-11 today, scratching some lottery tickets with an acorn. He won $5 and was going to buy some seeds with it

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Lonnie Lice ()
Date: October 13, 2022 10:46PM

Lucky 7’s Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I saw Furman standing outside the 7-11 today,
> scratching some lottery tickets with an acorn. He
> won $5 and was going to buy some seeds with it


He ain’t spending that $5 on no seeds. He will collect a little more and go to the ABC store and by some Jack Black

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Flatulence ()
Date: October 13, 2022 11:30PM

I saw Furman at the 7-11 too. As he stood outside the store, checking his lottery tickets, he lifted up his hind leg and let loose an enormous fart. It smelled so bad I almost gagged and he didn’t even pardon himself. Rude!

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Pancho Villa ()
Date: October 13, 2022 11:46PM

Flatulence Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I saw Furman at the 7-11 too. As he stood outside
> the store, checking his lottery tickets, he lifted
> up his hind leg and let loose an enormous fart. It
> smelled so bad I almost gagged and he didn’t
> even pardon himself. Rude!


Damn, that means he’s been eating at Tippys Taco again.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: pumpkin man ()
Date: October 15, 2022 12:36PM

Furman likes this time of year because he enjoys eating fresh pumpkins. It is a nice change to his diet and people leave pumpkins out everywhere!

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Gordy ()
Date: October 15, 2022 09:13PM

Furman will also eat gourds when he sees them, and they are smaller and easier to carry

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Alcoholic Acorn gatherer ()
Date: October 15, 2022 10:41PM

Furman does occasionally eat pumpkins and gourds but he washes them down with Budweiser and Jack Daniels.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Bud Light ()
Date: October 16, 2022 04:32PM

Furman is watching his weight so he only drinks Bud Light. He tried Coors Light but said it tastes like shit.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Gossip Groundhog ()
Date: October 16, 2022 09:48PM

Word is out that Furman is having another party this Saturday.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: What’s the occasion ()
Date: October 17, 2022 07:49AM

Is it someone’s birthday? We need to know to dress and if we need to bring a gift

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Robbie Rabbit ()
Date: October 17, 2022 07:53AM

What’s the occasion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is it someone’s birthday? We need to know to
> dress and if we need to bring a gift


It’s Furmans pre-Halloween party, wear a costume

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Hamster Hal ()
Date: October 17, 2022 11:17PM

Furmans party Saturday has been cancelled. Sorry for the late notice, but Furman has not been feeling well lately.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Rev Harry Woodchuck ()
Date: October 21, 2022 10:31PM

Everyone please pray for Furman. He is suffering from numerous ailments brought on by his heavy drinking and years of eating fast food.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Dan in the white van ()
Date: October 22, 2022 12:28PM

I saw Furman at PanAm about an hour ago he was looking a little rough but was hapily munching on a slice of pizza near the tombstones. Maybe he has trained one of the Domino's employees to feed him.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Rev Harry Woodchuck ()
Date: October 23, 2022 08:03AM

Furman just showed up to church wearing sunglasses and popping aspirin.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Winter is on the way ()
Date: October 23, 2022 01:35PM

Furman has been getting fucked up a lot lately. He saved a pot plant that he got off the balcony at the apartments. Between chewing on weed and drinking booze he is losing weight. The other squirrels are gathering acorns and nuts for the winter. If Furman does not get to work this week he may starve this winter. Maybe the guy who is obssesd with black seeds will drop off a bag of seeds to help Furman out.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furman. ()
Date: October 23, 2022 08:35PM

Listen up pot smoke black seeds are what we squirrels like the best , give us the choice of black sunflower seeds bird seeds and peanuts and we will go to town on the black seeds every time, don't blow weed smoke my way my pal Hip Hog is the one who lives for it, he stays on welfare too. Im a blue collar hardhat working squirrel who only drinks Pabst now if I can find it, your mistaking me with Pimping Squirrel again

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: King of Squirrels ()
Date: October 23, 2022 08:42PM

Furman. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Listen up pot smoke black seeds are what we
> squirrels like the best , give us the choice of
> black sunflower seeds bird seeds and peanuts and
> we will go to town on the black seeds every time,
> don't blow weed smoke my way my pal Hip Hog is the
> one who lives for it, he stays on welfare too. Im
> a blue collar hardhat working squirrel who only
> drinks Pabst now if I can find it, your mistaking
> me with Pimping Squirrel again

You sir are an imposter. Furman would never drink that Pabst snake piss. Only Budweiser, the king of beers, for Furman.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furman is chilling ()
Date: October 26, 2022 07:13AM

Furman got a room at the best western in Fairfax. He is using the free Wi-Fi to order a few bags of Purina squirrel chow for the winter. Furman is far too busy to be gathering acorns and shit. Furman got a upstairs room facing the woods for like three nights. It looks like he is having some friends over in the evening.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Best Western maintenance man ()
Date: October 26, 2022 11:05AM

Just saw Furman coming in with a 6 pack of Bud. Apparently he will drink it in his room to wash down the Squirrel chow.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Hotel fees ()
Date: October 26, 2022 04:04PM

Furman is chilling Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Furman got a room at the best western in Fairfax.
> He is using the free Wi-Fi to order a few bags of
> Purina squirrel chow for the winter. Furman is far
> too busy to be gathering acorns and shit. Furman
> got a upstairs room facing the woods for like
> three nights. It looks like he is having some
> friends over in the evening.

I wonder if Furman will be able to use the toilet in his room? If he shit and pisses on the floor they will tack on a 100 dollar room cleaning fee to Furmans Amex card.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Hotel spillage ()
Date: October 26, 2022 05:15PM

Hotel fees Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Furman is chilling Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Furman got a room at the best western in
> Fairfax.
> > He is using the free Wi-Fi to order a few bags
> of
> > Purina squirrel chow for the winter. Furman is
> far
> > too busy to be gathering acorns and shit.
> Furman
> > got a upstairs room facing the woods for like
> > three nights. It looks like he is having some
> > friends over in the evening.
>
> I wonder if Furman will be able to use the toilet
> in his room? If he shit and pisses on the floor
> they will tack on a 100 dollar room cleaning fee
> to Furmans Amex card.

This is a good question. With him drinking that Bud he will have to piss a lot.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Alive and Well ()
Date: October 26, 2022 08:38PM

Rumors of Furman’s ill health are unfounded. He just completed a 10k sprint up and down Tapawingo and stopped at each lap to do push-ups. He is in great shape

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: sink pisser ()
Date: October 27, 2022 05:22AM

Furman can piss in the sink so he should be ok.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Dr. Marcus Welby Woodchuck ()
Date: October 27, 2022 05:33AM

Alive and Well Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Rumors of Furman’s ill health are unfounded. He
> just completed a 10k sprint up and down Tapawingo
> and stopped at each lap to do push-ups. He is in
> great shape


As Furmans physician I can tell you that Furman is not in good shape. He has numerous health issues that I can’t go into detail about because of patient-Doctor confidentiality. Who you saw running on Tapawingo was his look-alike cousin, Richard Simmons Squirrel.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Bullshit! ()
Date: October 27, 2022 09:00PM

Stop lying about Furman! You’re no doctor. You’re one of those Russian squirrels planting propaganda and trying to steal our elections. Furman is strong!

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Dr Marcus Welby Woodchuck ()
Date: October 27, 2022 10:01PM

Bullshit! Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Stop lying about Furman! You’re no doctor.
> You’re one of those Russian squirrels planting
> propaganda and trying to steal our elections.
> Furman is strong!


I am a Doctor. I got my medical
degree from Rodent Health Memorial Hospital. I am really concerned with Furmans health. His years of eating McDonalds food has paid a toll on his health.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Nurse Nutsack ()
Date: October 30, 2022 01:47AM

Update. The Dr. Has Furman on several medications to control his blood pressure and cholesterol and putting him on a healthy diet, he should be back in good shape soon.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Medical Science ()
Date: October 30, 2022 11:49PM

After consulting a specialist, Furman has been told dietand exercise is all he needs to get back in tip top shape. He has been running up and down Tapawingo for the past week to get in shape

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Boris Secret Agent ()
Date: October 31, 2022 06:59AM

Medical Science Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> After consulting a specialist, Furman has been
> told dietand exercise is all he needs to get back
> in tip top shape. He has been running up and down
> Tapawingo for the past week to get in shape


Thanks for telling us where rodent runs, comrade. We can finally finish him off. I kill him, Putin will promote me.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: nutz ()
Date: October 31, 2022 03:28PM

Medical Science Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> After consulting a specialist, Furman has been
> told dietand exercise is all he needs to get back
> in tip top shape. He has been running up and down
> Tapawingo for the past week to get in shape

I saw him running on the W&OD trail too.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: groundskeeper ()
Date: November 06, 2022 02:58PM

microcenter employee Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Football Party Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Furman is going to have another party Sunday
> > afternoon to watch the Commanders play
> > Jacksonville. He said everyone is invited but
> to
> > bring a covered dish or a bag of seeds. No
> > freeloaders!
>
> Last year at this time a 32 inch flat screen
> disappeared off the loading dock. Surveillance
> video revealed that the device was carried away by
> roughly 12 squirrels. I am pretty sure it was
> Furman and some friends. I just wonder how they
> got power to it.

Now that some of the leaves are gone I spotted a good sized solar panel high in the trees behind Providence hall apts. Furman probably has a battery and a inverter rigged up to run that TV.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furman might die ()
Date: November 21, 2022 01:06PM

Furman has been down with the covid. He now wishes he had listened to Donald Trump and had got the vaxx.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Nurse Nutsack ()
Date: November 21, 2022 02:16PM

Furman does have Covid but he is responding well to treatment, and should be better soon.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Where he was last night ()
Date: November 21, 2022 10:40PM

I’m pretty sure I heard Furman on Meade Skelton’s livestream last night. He requested that Meade play Sweet Tea.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Chuckie Chipmunk ()
Date: November 21, 2022 11:37PM

Furman is feeling much better and is planning a big Christmas party. He’s going to try to get Meade to play at the party.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Ace reporter Earl Earthworm ()
Date: November 24, 2022 06:47PM

Furman had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Him and his buddies had a nice meal in the woods consisting of stuff he took yesterday from Safeway. They had Roast Turkey, Mashed potatoes, corn, Kings Hawaiian rolls and pumpkin pie.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Providence hall maintenance man ()
Date: December 12, 2022 03:35AM

Is Furman planning another big super bowl party this winter?

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Furmans press secretary ()
Date: December 12, 2022 06:24AM

Providence hall maintenance man Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is Furman planning another big super bowl party
> this winter?


Furman hasn’t decided yet. If he has a Christmas party he probably won’t have a Super Bowl party, but he is considering forgoing the Christmas party and only having a Super Bowl party. When a decision is made we will let you know.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Artemus the groundhog ()
Date: December 27, 2022 10:03PM

Last minute announcement, Furman will be having a New Year’s Eve party this Saturday night starting at 10pm behind micro center. Food and drinks provided. Everyone is invited except the Russian agents.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: U.N.C.L.E.guy ()
Date: December 27, 2022 10:11PM

Tell us more about these Russian agents.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Boris Killemoff ()
Date: December 28, 2022 01:07AM

U.N.C.L.E.guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Tell us more about these Russian agents.


I am too Russian agent. I will tell you myself. We are an elite unit of Russian special agents, commissioned by comrade Putin to kill
Your capitalist pig secret agent, comrade Furman.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Christmas Presents ()
Date: December 28, 2022 10:41AM

Furman wishes to thank whoever left the bag of McNuggets on the curb outside his tree with the bow on it

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Sandy Beavers. ()
Date: January 14, 2023 04:07AM

Looks like Furman is having a wild card weekend party starting today at noon. He booked two connecting rooms at the Fairfax Best Western. Last year he partied in the woods and it was kind of cold and wet. This is a big upgrade.

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Re: Highly aggressive Attack Squirrel at PanAm shopping center
Posted by: Warren Weasel ()
Date: January 14, 2023 05:31AM

Sandy Beavers. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Looks like Furman is having a wild card weekend
> party starting today at noon. He booked two
> connecting rooms at the Fairfax Best Western. Last
> year he partied in the woods and it was kind of
> cold and wet. This is a big upgrade.


Thanks for the update, Sandy. Is Furman providing the refreshments or is it BYO?

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