Don't give out your personal information spring onion. These men are not your local grocer.

Man o man I got me the weekend off again thiz week. We got a coupla guyz who want ta work tha weekends an thatz jus fine with me cauze I jus got payed. I am goin to tha store for beerz and some salmon I am a gonna cook on tha charcoal grill even if it iz rainin! I am findin smoked salmon wit brown rice ta be bowel firendly. I iz happy cause I been broke the las coupla dayz cauze I had to pay my car insurance thiz week. All my february billz is payed an I got some extra monney now, gonna save some an spend some.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Man o man I got me the weekend off again thiz
> week. We got a coupla guyz who want ta work tha
> weekends an thatz jus fine with me cauze I jus got
> payed. I am goin to tha store for beerz and some
> salmon I am a gonna cook on tha charcoal grill
> even if it iz rainin! I am findin smoked salmon
> wit brown rice ta be bowel firendly. I iz happy
> cause I been broke the las coupla dayz cauze I had
> to pay my car insurance thiz week. All my february
> billz is payed an I got some extra monney now,
> gonna save some an spend some.

I know you have a record but honestly if all the money you have is enough to pay bills and a hundred or so left over for beerz and salmon dont you think you should at least plan to earn more. You are a grown man. You are going to need things like a retirement fund, life insurance, disability insurance. Are you planning on being a burden to society. Are me and my kidz gonna be paying your rent and food bills in 30 years???

Interesting thread. I have a degenerative disk disease now for almost 12 years. My disc are disappearing leaving my vertebrae to grind on one another. Sometimes this causes debilitating pain and yes incontinence. A couple weeks ago I was helping my boss change her tire - it had gone flat in the parking garage. Trying to get the last lug nut off I twisted my back, fell over and shit myself. Ultimate humiliation. It took five minutes for the back spasms to stop so I could get up and leave to go change then head to urgent care.

My boss was really understanding and ended up calling AAA

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Man o man I got me the weekend off again thiz
> week. We got a coupla guyz who want ta work tha
> weekends an thatz jus fine with me cauze I jus got
> payed. I am goin to tha store for beerz and some
> salmon I am a gonna cook on tha charcoal grill
> even if it iz rainin! I am findin smoked salmon
> wit brown rice ta be bowel firendly. I iz happy
> cause I been broke the las coupla dayz cauze I had
> to pay my car insurance thiz week. All my february
> billz is payed an I got some extra monney now,
> gonna save some an spend some.


Forget the naysayers Red Onion. I'm proud of you that you have picked despite the cost to pay your bowels forward. You're a great guy!

not hungry Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Interesting thread. I have a degenerative disk
> disease now for almost 12 years. My disc are
> disappearing leaving my vertebrae to grind on one
> another. Sometimes this causes debilitating pain
> and yes incontinence. A couple weeks ago I was
> helping my boss change her tire - it had gone flat
> in the parking garage. Trying to get the last lug
> nut off I twisted my back, fell over and shit
> myself. Ultimate humiliation. It took five
> minutes for the back spasms to stop so I could get
> up and leave to go change then head to urgent
> care.
>
> My boss was really understanding and ended up
> calling AAA


Welcome aboard brother in bowel. This is your home too, and the brothers in bowel here support you. So sorry to hear your back led to this, and despite being sad about this shitty tire change, I sit here inspired.

Your boss is a bowel buddy. Most bosses are narcisstic assholes, and would ride your ass for such an event. If we can present your boss with a bowel buddy certificate framed consider it done.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
I watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shit

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
bowel buddy

You're doing productive work red onion.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Man o man I got me the weekend off again thiz
> week. We got a coupla guyz who want ta work tha
> weekends an thatz jus fine with me cauze I jus got
> payed. I am goin to tha store for beerz and some
> salmon I am a gonna cook on tha charcoal grill
> even if it iz rainin! I am findin smoked salmon
> wit brown rice ta be bowel firendly. I iz happy
> cause I been broke the las coupla dayz cauze I had
> to pay my car insurance thiz week. All my february
> billz is payed an I got some extra monney now,
> gonna save some an spend some.


Okay I tried to read this. Instead of throwing various foods your way, who's your local grocer. They can help you with healthy choices on a budget.

Advise Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Man o man I got me the weekend off again thiz
> > week. We got a coupla guyz who want ta work tha
> > weekends an thatz jus fine with me cauze I jus
> got
> > payed. I am goin to tha store for beerz and
> some
> > salmon I am a gonna cook on tha charcoal grill
> > even if it iz rainin! I am findin smoked salmon
> > wit brown rice ta be bowel firendly. I iz happy
> > cause I been broke the las coupla dayz cauze I
> had
> > to pay my car insurance thiz week. All my
> february
> > billz is payed an I got some extra monney now,
> > gonna save some an spend some.
>
>
> Okay I tried to read this. Instead of throwing
> various foods your way, who's your local grocer.
> They can help you with healthy choices on a
> budget.

Forget the grocer he needs to go to a trade school or community college to get a real job so he is not changin oilz and spinning signz

The fetid scents this morning are so bad, that both of my canaries have died. I sit here on the groan throne, with numb legs, in a uncomfortable spot. Yes I can watch Netflix or use the computer here.

Midwives will be here soon. Thus far the rectal mirror looks like something out of a horror story.

Local grocer

Local grocer

Local grocer

Local grocer

Local grocer

Local grocer

Local grocer

The Local grocer guy is an ignorant fuck.

a observation. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> Local grocer
>
> The Local grocer guy is an ignorant fuck.


Happen to agree with you, probably a disciple of ass doctors and their 15th century medicine. The brown phone has unfortunately rung, so some of my midwives are going over to Matildas to help her out as she's in a holding pattern as well. Sir Isaac Newtons gravity discovery did little to make big objects in our colons fall down.

The obese neighbor is asleep snoring and farting on the living room couch. Mom made me a healthy breakfast, dad seems to be more distant as he's mows the grass in thong underwear. As usual one beer in his hand and smoking cigarettes. Guess its a Nintendo Switch kind of day.

You guys need to mark your calendars for Digestive disease week this summer (June 2-5) at the Washington convention center. See you there!

http://www.ddw.org/home

A helper Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You guys need to mark your calendars for Digestive
> disease week this summer (June 2-5) at the
> Washington convention center. See you there!
>
> http://www.ddw.org/home


Sign me up. I'm going. Thanks!

I enjoyed the whole cornbread and sodas. My bowels my choice. Going to eat fried chicken and mashed potatoes now.

Boiled Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I enjoyed the whole cornbread and sodas. My bowels
> my choice. Going to eat fried chicken and mashed
> potatoes now.


Your right but if over 40, not a wise idea.

Relieved the brown phone and midwives helped my sister. Per them as they await my blast off t minus something it was the biggest she's had.

Not sure if I should provide unconditional love or deliver a sermon, as I believe she might be raiding the pantry too much.

Verified Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> A helper Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > You guys need to mark your calendars for
> Digestive
> > disease week this summer (June 2-5) at the
> > Washington convention center. See you there!
> >
> > http://www.ddw.org/home
>
>
> Sign me up. I'm going. Thanks!


Yes, I want to go as well!

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shitBrown Onion Looks at himself shit

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
BO craves shit on his chestBO craves shit on his chest
BO craves shit on his chest
BO craves shit on his chest

Boiled Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I enjoyed the whole cornbread and sodas. My bowels
> my choice. Going to eat fried chicken and mashed
> potatoes now.

Who gives a fuck what you eat? I certainly dont. Is this scat foreplay or something. Do your friends rub one out thinking what kind of shit you will have after fried chix?

Are you mocking these idiots that watch themselves shit with a mirror or just taunting them because your shit is normal?

Quick Question for Boiled Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Boiled Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I enjoyed the whole cornbread and sodas. My
> bowels
> > my choice. Going to eat fried chicken and
> mashed
> > potatoes now.
>
> Who gives a fuck what you eat? I certainly dont.
> Is this scat foreplay or something. Do your
> friends rub one out thinking what kind of shit you
> will have after fried chix?
>
> Are you mocking these idiots that watch themselves
> shit with a mirror or just taunting them because
> your shit is normal?



Tell everyone how superior your bowels are. Boiled has every right to decide on what's eaten or not, although that would tear up my plumbing.

Under the boardwalk
by
Jhonny Bravo



Oh when my ass gets hot and burns like the tar up on a roof
And my crack gets so hot I wish my starfish was fireproof
Under the boardwalk, down by the sea, yeah
Spreading my cheeks so discretly is where I'll be

(Under the boardwalk) out of the sun
(Under the boardwalk) I'll be taking a dump
(Under the boardwalk) people walking above
(Under the boardwalk) I'll be laying a egg like a dove
Under the boardwalk, boardwalk

In the park you hear the happy sound of a carousel
Mm-mm, you can almost taste the hot dogs and french fries they sell
Under the boardwalk, down by the sea
Dropping a big tar baby is where I'll be

I dont get it, pictures of poop, poems about poop, arguments about what you eat some faggot talking about midwives and starfish - what is this all about?

jhonny bravo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Under the boardwalk
> by
> Jhonny Bravo
>
>
>
> Oh when my ass gets hot and burns like the tar up
> on a roof
> And my crack gets so hot I wish my starfish was
> fireproof
> Under the boardwalk, down by the sea, yeah
> Spreading my cheeks so discretly is where I'll be
>
> (Under the boardwalk) out of the sun
> (Under the boardwalk) I'll be taking a dump
> (Under the boardwalk) people walking above
> (Under the boardwalk) I'll be laying a egg like a
> dove
> Under the boardwalk, boardwalk
>
> In the park you hear the happy sound of a
> carousel
> Mm-mm, you can almost taste the hot dogs and
> french fries they sell
> Under the boardwalk, down by the sea
> Dropping a big tar baby is where I'll be

How about that. A round of applause Mr Bravo! With soaped hands. Still working on this savage beast but dilation is increasing.

Peter_C Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I dont get it, pictures of poop, poems about poop,
> arguments about what you eat some faggot talking
> about midwives and starfish - what is this all
> about?


This is about bowels, foods, working through our frustrations as many of us can't have #4 #2's.

We would like to welcome you. Feel free to discuss your bowels.

Dad is passed out drunk, and the obese neighbor is wearing a floral dress, playing grandmas piano. I don't know where grandma and mom are, but the obese neighbors cookie crumbs between the keys won't be a good thing. I warned him but he just shrugged his shoulders, and is playing music that's surprisingly pretty good.

All the pontificating, simply go to your local grocer, and find the produce manager. See what they recently got in, buy that, cook as necessary and stop clogging your bodies with unhealthy items!

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
picture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on mepicture of VGO shitting on me

Brown Onion Wrote:
------------------------------------------------------
I watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shitI watch myself shit

I'm flattered you waste time posting shit pictures and angry rants.

^well I thought you blocked the images so how do you know what is being posted?

If you have problems, you should visit your local grocer. Talk to the store manager. Know the produce and seafood manager on a first name basis.

I ate mac and cheese. What was I thinking? My poor bowels!

Good morning BiB's! I hope everyone is having a nice #4 #2 this morning. I must admit that I had a little slip up yesterday, it was damp and cloudy and Mrs Dive was out of town visiting her sister. I was home alone watching netflix and I was hungry. I put a Tombstone supreme pizza in our big toaster oven thinking I would only have a slice or two. I ate the ENTIRE pizza! I was farting all day and my gut was churning. I just now dropped off a load but I don't think I am out of the woods yet.

dive bomber Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Good morning BiB's! I hope everyone is having a
> nice #4 #2 this morning. I must admit that I had a
> little slip up yesterday, it was damp and cloudy
> and Mrs Dive was out of town visiting her sister.
> I was home alone watching netflix and I was
> hungry. I put a Tombstone supreme pizza in our big
> toaster oven thinking I would only have a slice or
> two. I ate the ENTIRE pizza! I was farting all day
> and my gut was churning. I just now dropped off a
> load but I don't think I am out of the woods yet.

Happens to the best of us. Those taste great but what they do to our bowels is bad. Recently I made the mistake of Stouffer's French bread pizzas. It was excruciating.

Aside from the obtuse write ups, if anyone here legitimately has IBS or another illness, I am back from a seminar that was held at University of Maryland.

When I started out there were limited options, but thanks to the DNA helix discovery and molecular level research, a gastroenterologist has lots of tools at their disposal. New prescriptions will be released next year that have immunotherapy as part of the equation.

I had 3 sausage patties + 2 fried eggs and a huge serving of ore-ida potatos o'brien covered in texas pete hot sauce for breakfast a couple hours ago. I have shit 3 times since then. My bowels are really doing well today. Next up is Olive Garden for lunch, spaghetti with Italian sausage + breadsticks and salad.

Verified Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> dive bomber Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Good morning BiB's! I hope everyone is having a
> > nice #4 #2 this morning. I must admit that I had
> a
> > little slip up yesterday, it was damp and
> cloudy
> > and Mrs Dive was out of town visiting her
> sister.
> > I was home alone watching netflix and I was
> > hungry. I put a Tombstone supreme pizza in our
> big
> > toaster oven thinking I would only have a slice
> or
> > two. I ate the ENTIRE pizza! I was farting all
> day
> > and my gut was churning. I just now dropped off
> a
> > load but I don't think I am out of the woods
> yet.
>
> Happens to the best of us. Those taste great but
> what they do to our bowels is bad. Recently I made
> the mistake of Stouffer's French bread pizzas. It
> was excruciating.

Fucking idiots. You buy then eat frozen processed foods then complain about your shit. Imagine what all that food is doing to your heart. You will die slow deaths, confused as to 'why is this happening to me' and in the end doctors wont let you eat the processed shit you crave, you will be miserable and sick.

Warms my heart to think of these days to come for you. enjoy looking at images of yourselves shitting with your 'rectal mirrors' you sick simpletons.

boiled onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I had 3 sausage patties + 2 fried eggs and a huge
> serving of ore-ida potatos o'brien covered in
> texas pete hot sauce for breakfast a couple hours
> ago. I have shit 3 times since then. My bowels are
> really doing well today. Next up is Olive Garden
> for lunch, spaghetti with Italian sausage +
> breadsticks and salad.


A man who enjoys his obesity and heart disease - I can appreciate that. Why not leave the details of your shit to yourself? Do you FAP to the idea of feces???

Dive and verified, it can happen to any of us as our bowels tell us what to eat. Will respond to anon dick later, who's sausage fingers would be a hotdog in what's left of my starfish. What a terrible experience but colon is clear.

I just got back from Aldi. I bought red peppers, oranges, baby carrots, celery, whole wheat bread,granola bars, boneless-skinless chicken breasts, brown rice, grapes and peanut butter. My Dad got country ribs, charcoal and 3 different kinds of chips along with moon pies and two gallons of ice cream.
I tried to talk about nutrition with him but he does not want to hear it.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown Onion Watches himself shitBrown Onion Watches himself shitBrown Onion Watches himself shitBrown Onion Watches himself shitBrown Onion Watches himself shit

Exercise Alters Our Microbiome. Is That One Reason It’s So Good for Us?


https://www.nytimes.com/2018/01/03/well/move/exercise-microbiome-health-weight-gut-bacteria.html

This required reading?
Attachments:

You go to your local grocer and these "problems" will decrease.

Hi all! 5am guy checking in again. 5am guy is getting off work in a few hours and then 5am guy has 3 whole nights off. 5am guy took a dump earlier that was just wonderful. It is rare that 5am guy has a full evacuation of his bowels and 5am guy thinks that eating plenty of blackberries has something to do with that. 5am guys mostly Hispanic female friend has turned 5am guy on to blackberries and 5am guy has been eating them alot.
5am guy and his mostly Hispanic female friend are going to drive to the Pennsylvania dutch country tomorrow and possibly stay in a hotel overnight. 5am guy is not sure at this point if it will be separate rooms or one room. 5am guy is getting nervous about this.
5am guy sends the very best of wishes to all the regulars here!

5am guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi all! 5am guy checking in again. 5am guy is
> getting off work in a few hours and then 5am guy
> has 3 whole nights off. 5am guy took a dump
> earlier that was just wonderful. It is rare that
> 5am guy has a full evacuation of his bowels and
> 5am guy thinks that eating plenty of blackberries
> has something to do with that. 5am guys mostly
> Hispanic female friend has turned 5am guy on to
> blackberries and 5am guy has been eating them
> alot.
> 5am guy and his mostly Hispanic female friend are
> going to drive to the Pennsylvania dutch country
> tomorrow and possibly stay in a hotel overnight.
> 5am guy is not sure at this point if it will be
> separate rooms or one room. 5am guy is getting
> nervous about this.
> 5am guy sends the very best of wishes to all the
> regulars here!

Jesus 5am guy get a grip - you are a grown man. Get a room with a queen bed and fuck her silly. How hard is this? Grown man makes plans with grown woman to take a trip and stay at the same hotel = fuckfest. Also blackberries are out of season where are you getting them? If they help this only lends credibility to the 'see your local grocer' guy that keeps posting here.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> not hungry Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Interesting thread. I have a degenerative disk
> > disease now for almost 12 years. My disc are
> > disappearing leaving my vertebrae to grind on
> one
> > another. Sometimes this causes debilitating
> pain
> > and yes incontinence. A couple weeks ago I was
> > helping my boss change her tire - it had gone
> flat
> > in the parking garage. Trying to get the last
> lug
> > nut off I twisted my back, fell over and shit
> > myself. Ultimate humiliation. It took five
> > minutes for the back spasms to stop so I could
> get
> > up and leave to go change then head to urgent
> > care.
> >
> > My boss was really understanding and ended up
> > calling AAA
>
>
> Welcome aboard brother in bowel. This is your home
> too, and the brothers in bowel here support you.
> So sorry to hear your back led to this, and
> despite being sad about this shitty tire change, I
> sit here inspired.
>
> Your boss is a bowel buddy. Most bosses are
> narcisstic assholes, and would ride your ass for
> such an event. If we can present your boss with a
> bowel buddy certificate framed consider it done.


Thanks, I guess. This thread is pretty fucked up though you would have to admit that.For every post about good foods or treatment for bowel issues there are a dozen disgusting pictures or stories using 2nd grader level language. I think you are one of the ones that posts about looking at yourself go to the bathroom and pretending you have attendants helping you deliver your bowel movements.

That strikes me as both stupid and disgusting. Definitely not helpful for those of us with real world problems with our bodies. Id agree most with the poster talking about seeing gastroenterologists or the other poster talkig about making food choices at the grocery. Any in my case its my spine causing problems.

^poor lost soul doesnt realize this is a scat fetish thread - thinks its about diet and health. lol

Recovering from stitches above my starfish.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
my starfishmy starfishmy starfishmy starfishmy starfishmy starfishmy starfish

Back from meeting my guidance counselor and the obese neighbor. That was interesting, but it seems him and my dad are a couple, and he wants to accept this. I cannot as my dad and mom are married. He cried non stop a complete mess. At least dad met him and gave him a hug, while smoking and drinking.

Spring Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Back from meeting my guidance counselor and the
> obese neighbor. That was interesting, but it seems
> him and my dad are a couple, and he wants to
> accept this. I cannot as my dad and mom are
> married. He cried non stop a complete mess. At
> least dad met him and gave him a hug, while
> smoking and drinking.


Spring this is a natural event happening - your dad has found love whose name should not be mentioned - ass love. You and your mom will have to learn to live with new rules, emotions and smells. Your disgusting neighbor has horned in on your dear mother to displace her position in your dad's heat and loins. Again this is natural. Perhaps you have direct questions about ass-love I could help you with. My white van is always ready for a trip to get graphic cards, ice cream or even just sweet flavored hard liquor for your consumption.

seriously fucked up thread

When I have the toothpaste shits I have to dig into my starfish for 5 min to get it clean - it greedily holds onto the poo. Is there a secret to getting the starfish clean in this scenario?

Oh how nice. Impersonate me an older man who's relatively wise and a smart caring high school student. You are a wiseass at best at worst a sociopath.

I ate French toast. What was I thinking? My poor bowels!

Stingy Starfish Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> When I have the toothpaste shits I have to dig
> into my starfish for 5 min to get it clean - it
> greedily holds onto the poo. Is there a secret to
> getting the starfish clean in this scenario?


Witch hazel and soap. This works for all starfishes whether you are white or some third world savage. It is unfortunate some think putting items in their fish is some sort of amusement, but rather its not a playground and exit only.

Verified Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Oh how nice. Impersonate me an older man who's
> relatively wise and a smart caring high school
> student. You are a wiseass at best at worst a
> sociopath.


Let them bitch and moan verified. Its obvious the idiot is butt hurt with images and angry rants/pretending to be people here. That's their right too, and when their bowels betray them they will be more compassionate.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shitBrown Onion plays with his shit

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes ShitBrown Onion Likes Shit

Dad brought home ribs from Tony Roma's last night and expected me to eat it. I had some fries and the cole slaw but was smart enough to avoid the sugar and fat in those ribs. Dad ate a whole rack, plus two full sides of mashed potatoes and mac and cheese. The rest of the night we watched the closing ceremony of the Olympics on DVR while dad farted loudly from his easy chair. Mom says he enjoys his food twice that way.

I left after the farting began to work on my Spring Science Fair project - Im working on a presentation on the reclamation of water and trace minerals by the large intestine. Im building a model of the colon to scale at 160.5 cm and have to figure out how to simulate peristalsis. I intend to show how important this organ is both in normal function and in a disease state. Today at school Ill have the turkey wrap in a multi grain wrap with a cabbage salad I brought from home.

ate a whole package of Bob Evan's sausage this morning now my farts smell like sage - what was I thinking!!!

Spring Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dad brought home ribs from Tony Roma's last night
> and expected me to eat it. I had some fries and
> the cole slaw but was smart enough to avoid the
> sugar and fat in those ribs. Dad ate a whole
> rack, plus two full sides of mashed potatoes and
> mac and cheese. The rest of the night we watched
> the closing ceremony of the Olympics on DVR while
> dad farted loudly from his easy chair. Mom says
> he enjoys his food twice that way.
>
> I left after the farting began to work on my
> Spring Science Fair project - Im working on a
> presentation on the reclamation of water and trace
> minerals by the large intestine. Im building a
> model of the colon to scale at 160.5 cm and have
> to figure out how to simulate peristalsis. I
> intend to show how important this organ is both in
> normal function and in a disease state. Today at
> school Ill have the turkey wrap in a multi grain
> wrap with a cabbage salad I brought from home.


Despite home being stinky, I'm proud of your work. Hope you get a well deserved A on this project as it is imperative. In fact, I think the school should honor you for your food choices and important work in the IBS field.

A mess all over the office.

I worry my boss will fire me.

Dad is at school. He's smoking a cigarette, drinking vodka martini's while talking to the principal. The obese neighbor is outside the office farting in his pink dress. Some kids laugh at him. I hope they don't know who he is as his makeup is awful and he looks like a disgusting fat woman.

Spring Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dad is at school. He's smoking a cigarette,
> drinking vodka martini's while talking to the
> principal. The obese neighbor is outside the
> office farting in his pink dress. Some kids laugh
> at him. I hope they don't know who he is as his
> makeup is awful and he looks like a disgusting fat
> woman.


Spring, sorry to hear you are suffering at the hands of adults around you. Your dad's drinking is a particular concern. Your neighbor, though disgusting and obese does have rights. If 'he' 'she' or 'they' feel the need to wear a dress then so be it. It is clearly important to them and most likely is very freeing to wear a dress when you consider his balls and starfish get to enjoy the Zepher breezes of your high school and surrounding environs.

I hesitate to get involved, but if you would like I have some smart numbers in a mid-thigh you may wish to try on. You would be surprised how freeing it can be. If you send me some pictures of you in your underwear I can estimate your dress size and drive by in my white panel van so you can try them on in the privacy of my vehicle. Be glad to bring you for ice cream after if you like too. Be well and contact via my Brown Onion screen name here and Ill put things in motion...

Spring - dont give out your personal info or contact anyone on these boards. There are unbalanced and potentially dangerous middle aged men here that appear to be 'grooming' you. I think it would be a good idea to let a trusted adult know what is going on with you on this forum. Let them see the discussions/solicitations. Good luck and keep your info private!

Parent of a teen Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Spring - dont give out your personal info or
> contact anyone on these boards. There are
> unbalanced and potentially dangerous middle aged
> men here that appear to be 'grooming' you. I
> think it would be a good idea to let a trusted
> adult know what is going on with you on this
> forum. Let them see the
> discussions/solicitations. Good luck and keep
> your info private!

Agree completely. These individuals are disturbing. Instead of visiting a local grocer, they appear to be a community nuisance!

^Spring is very good at visiting his local grocer - it wouldnt surprise me if they are on a first name basis. Spring favors one of the best - Alde. Fresh organic produce can be had there. They even carry locally sourced organic toilet paper and moist towelettes for use in natural earth toilets.

limiting processed foods especially refined sugars are essential. My grocer extols the virtue of a wide variety of wholesome foods such as beets, squash, tree nuts and of course apples. I dont know how I would survive without my grocer's guidance and provision of excellent foods.

Fiber and falvanoids Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ^Spring is very good at visiting his local grocer
> - it wouldnt surprise me if they are on a first
> name basis. Spring favors one of the best - Alde.
> Fresh organic produce can be had there. They
> even carry locally sourced organic toilet paper
> and moist towelettes for use in natural earth
> toilets.
>
> limiting processed foods especially refined sugars
> are essential. My grocer extols the virtue of a
> wide variety of wholesome foods such as beets,
> squash, tree nuts and of course apples. I dont
> know how I would survive without my grocer's
> guidance and provision of excellent foods.


Whatever you say anon dick. How's your stinky finger?

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown watches himself poop

Dad and the obese neighbor in the basement in clear Speedo bathing suits dancing to These Dreams by Heart. It looks as if there is some brown matter on the backside of my dad's underwear as he spins around vaping cherry flavored vape juice. Mom passed out from drinking an hour ago and Grandma is making me some salmon patties with wild rice, salad and steamed carrots.

I think Ill head to my room after dinner and work on my Spring Science Fair bowel project.

my dear god what is this all about?

I like to eat Swanson Hungry Man TV dinners. They offer a balanced diet with minimal preparation. The one with the fried chicken is really good and the salisbury steak one is also very good. I eat one every night.
For breakfast it's hard to beat the Aunt Jemima frozen breakfast. The one with eggs, sausage links and potatoes is the best and ready in just 2 minutes in the microwave.
Eating TV dinners constantly saves me time and money compared to visiting my local grocer.

Hi all! 5am guy here again. 5am guy is at a hotel right now with the mostly Hispanic girl. Some good things are happening to 5am guy and some bad things too. 5am guy will update in his next post. 5am guy sends best wishes from Pennsylvania.

5am guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi all! 5am guy here again. 5am guy is at a hotel
> right now with the mostly Hispanic girl. Some good
> things are happening to 5am guy and some bad
> things too. 5am guy will update in his next post.
> 5am guy sends best wishes from Pennsylvania.

Hi 5 a.m. I worry about this lady, hoping she's from Spain so of European descent or at least mostly European so not too much third world blood to stress you out. How are her bowels? Glad she's a supporting type of person at least.

That was an interesting breakfast. Dad smoked cigarettes and drank beer, while the obese neighbor fried two pounds of bacon and eggs for them. Mom stays in the family room drinking wine with grandma. On a plus note the obese neighbor gave me healthy Raisin Bran and an orange. He also packed me a healthy lunch bag, but I'm embarrassed he wrote my name on it like I'm an elementary student.

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
BO pretends Bowel movements are like having a babyBO pretends Bowel movements are like having a babyBO pretends Bowel movements are like having a baby

5am guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi all! 5am guy here again. 5am guy is at a hotel
> right now with the mostly Hispanic girl. Some good
> things are happening to 5am guy and some bad
> things too. 5am guy will update in his next post.
> 5am guy sends best wishes from Pennsylvania.


Though we all support you, mixing races with a dirty half-breed wetback will come to no good end 5am. Perhaps you are just using her like a whore which is fine but please dont consider mixing races as its bad for society and our bowels. Our great leader Brown Onion has instructed us well in the sub-human qualities of non-Europeans and especially wetbacks and 'brown savages.' As he has stated many times they are to be run over with our vehicles not bedded in cheap hotel rooms...

Impersonating me and others= I am flattered.

Had to have a meeting with my boss. He's worried about my hygiene, and doesn't like that I crapped the floor. I don't like it either.

While I appreciate the obese neighbor packing my lunch, I did not ask him to come to the school cafeteria. He sat at my table eating pizza slices and farting.

Dear Jim (aka 'Brown Splatter'),

HR informed me of the existence of this website and your posting on this thread. First I would like to say that on behalf of our corporation we in no way discriminate against any disability any of our employees, customers or anyone else may have. We seek to provide a safe, productive work environment for all our staff. In our meeting I expressed not my displeasure with your condition but rather serious concerns over deposits of liquid feces left in your office, the hallways, the break room and lobby areas of our facility. As you readily admit that these unsavory leavings are the direct result of your condition we have ascribed this particular hazard to your file.

While we wish to accommodate your disability we must also aver to protect ALL our employees and customers. Just last week a night cleaning woman slipped and badly injured herself when she slipped on one of your ungodly messes on the tile floor of the lobby. We have provided you with orange cones to mark dangerous areas left behind after your 'attacks' and we have provided numerous adult diaper products for you - products you refuse to use.

As you know you are currently on probation for health and safety violations caused by your negligence these past 6 months. Should we encounter even one more unmarked puddle of hot (or cold) liquid feces we will have it DNA tested and if it is yours your employment will be terminated apropos the terms of our employment agreement.

We wish you the best and please understand this is a matter of safety and not in any way a position regarding your disability.

Phillip C
Your Boss

PS please stop using the potted plants as emergency bathrooms as they are all dying and we have had to pay $1500 to have these replaced.

Howdy brown guyz! I jus got home from work an I had ta run to tha toilit an blow me a big brown load. At lunchtime taday a customer brought in 4 exta most bestest pizzas from lil ceazerz. Well I waz hungry an I really didn feel like eatin tha tuna an triscuit crackerz I brought fo lunch so I ate me a bunch ov that pizza. Man o man I ate over half a pizza an I know that waz not a good idea. My roomate iz already complanin bout tha smell in tha bathroom, he sayz I blew it up! Im gonna set here an drink a 6 pack of budweizerz in 16 ounce canz an maybe that will make me feel better.
I shore hope yall brown guyz are doin better than me.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Howdy brown guyz! I jus got home from work an I
> had ta run to tha toilit an blow me a big brown
> load. At lunchtime taday a customer brought in 4
> exta most bestest pizzas from lil ceazerz. Well I
> waz hungry an I really didn feel like eatin tha
> tuna an triscuit crackerz I brought fo lunch so I
> ate me a bunch ov that pizza. Man o man I ate over
> half a pizza an I know that waz not a good idea.
> My roomate iz already complanin bout tha smell in
> tha bathroom, he sayz I blew it up! Im gonna set
> here an drink a 6 pack of budweizerz in 16 ounce
> canz an maybe that will make me feel better.
> I shore hope yall brown guyz are doin better than
> me.

riveting, you shit and it smells. how fucking rare. dolt.

Brown Splatter's Boss Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dear Jim (aka 'Brown Splatter'),
>
> HR informed me of the existence of this website
> and your posting on this thread. First I would
> like to say that on behalf of our corporation we
> in no way discriminate against any disability any
> of our employees, customers or anyone else may
> have. We seek to provide a safe, productive work
> environment for all our staff. In our meeting I
> expressed not my displeasure with your condition
> but rather serious concerns over deposits of
> liquid feces left in your office, the hallways,
> the break room and lobby areas of our facility.
> As you readily admit that these unsavory leavings
> are the direct result of your condition we have
> ascribed this particular hazard to your file.
>
> While we wish to accommodate your disability we
> must also aver to protect ALL our employees and
> customers. Just last week a night cleaning woman
> slipped and badly injured herself when she slipped
> on one of your ungodly messes on the tile floor of
> the lobby. We have provided you with orange cones
> to mark dangerous areas left behind after your
> 'attacks' and we have provided numerous adult
> diaper products for you - products you refuse to
> use.
>
> As you know you are currently on probation for
> health and safety violations caused by your
> negligence these past 6 months. Should we
> encounter even one more unmarked puddle of hot (or
> cold) liquid feces we will have it DNA tested and
> if it is yours your employment will be terminated
> apropos the terms of our employment agreement.
>
> We wish you the best and please understand this is
> a matter of safety and not in any way a position
> regarding your disability.
>
> Phillip C
> Your Boss
>
> PS please stop using the potted plants as
> emergency bathrooms as they are all dying and we
> have had to pay $1500 to have these replaced.

Go fuck yourself, Phil. I quit.

PS I shit inside your desk drawer this afternoon before I left. Enjoy.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Howdy brown guyz! I jus got home from work an I
> had ta run to tha toilit an blow me a big brown
> load. At lunchtime taday a customer brought in 4
> exta most bestest pizzas from lil ceazerz. Well I
> waz hungry an I really didn feel like eatin tha
> tuna an triscuit crackerz I brought fo lunch so I
> ate me a bunch ov that pizza. Man o man I ate over
> half a pizza an I know that waz not a good idea.
> My roomate iz already complanin bout tha smell in
> tha bathroom, he sayz I blew it up! Im gonna set
> here an drink a 6 pack of budweizerz in 16 ounce
> canz an maybe that will make me feel better.
> I shore hope yall brown guyz are doin better than
> me.


Oh my goodness red onion. Can I offer you some midwives for your rectum post care at least? That must have really hurt.

This forum is more ghetto than a Commodores concert today. Getting ready for a bowel buster. Hope you're feeling better brother in bowel!

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
Brown Onion is Racist watches himself shitBrown Onion is Racist watches himself shitBrown Onion is Racist watches himself shitBrown Onion is Racist watches himself shit

Brown Splatter Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Splatter's Boss Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Dear Jim (aka 'Brown Splatter'),
> >
> > HR informed me of the existence of this website
> > and your posting on this thread. First I would
> > like to say that on behalf of our corporation
> we
> > in no way discriminate against any disability
> any
> > of our employees, customers or anyone else may
> > have. We seek to provide a safe, productive
> work
> > environment for all our staff. In our meeting
> I
> > expressed not my displeasure with your
> condition
> > but rather serious concerns over deposits of
> > liquid feces left in your office, the hallways,
> > the break room and lobby areas of our facility.
>
> > As you readily admit that these unsavory
> leavings
> > are the direct result of your condition we have
> > ascribed this particular hazard to your file.
> >
> > While we wish to accommodate your disability we
> > must also aver to protect ALL our employees and
> > customers. Just last week a night cleaning
> woman
> > slipped and badly injured herself when she
> slipped
> > on one of your ungodly messes on the tile floor
> of
> > the lobby. We have provided you with orange
> cones
> > to mark dangerous areas left behind after your
> > 'attacks' and we have provided numerous adult
> > diaper products for you - products you refuse
> to
> > use.
> >
> > As you know you are currently on probation for
> > health and safety violations caused by your
> > negligence these past 6 months. Should we
> > encounter even one more unmarked puddle of hot
> (or
> > cold) liquid feces we will have it DNA tested
> and
> > if it is yours your employment will be
> terminated
> > apropos the terms of our employment agreement.
> >
> > We wish you the best and please understand this
> is
> > a matter of safety and not in any way a
> position
> > regarding your disability.
> >
> > Phillip C
> > Your Boss
> >
> > PS please stop using the potted plants as
> > emergency bathrooms as they are all dying and
> we
> > have had to pay $1500 to have these replaced.
>
> Go fuck yourself, Phil. I quit.
>
> PS I shit inside your desk drawer this afternoon
> before I left. Enjoy.

let me guess dipshit Brown Splatter will sue his totally reasonable employer. What a shithead

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Howdy brown guyz! I jus got home from work an I
> > had ta run to tha toilit an blow me a big brown
> > load. At lunchtime taday a customer brought in
> 4
> > exta most bestest pizzas from lil ceazerz. Well
> I
> > waz hungry an I really didn feel like eatin tha
> > tuna an triscuit crackerz I brought fo lunch so
> I
> > ate me a bunch ov that pizza. Man o man I ate
> over
> > half a pizza an I know that waz not a good
> idea.
> > My roomate iz already complanin bout tha smell
> in
> > tha bathroom, he sayz I blew it up! Im gonna
> set
> > here an drink a 6 pack of budweizerz in 16
> ounce
> > canz an maybe that will make me feel better.
> > I shore hope yall brown guyz are doin better
> than
> > me.
>
>
> Oh my goodness red onion. Can I offer you some
> midwives for your rectum post care at least? That
> must have really hurt.
>
> This forum is more ghetto than a Commodores
> concert today. Getting ready for a bowel buster.
> Hope you're feeling better brother in bowel!

Hey yo fuck you eh. You son of the bitch. Go to fuck your mom you ass hole. Eat the dick of a horse. Bafungool!

Antonio Rizzovicci Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Howdy brown guyz! I jus got home from work an
> I
> > > had ta run to tha toilit an blow me a big
> brown
> > > load. At lunchtime taday a customer brought
> in
> > 4
> > > exta most bestest pizzas from lil ceazerz.
> Well
> > I
> > > waz hungry an I really didn feel like eatin
> tha
> > > tuna an triscuit crackerz I brought fo lunch
> so
> > I
> > > ate me a bunch ov that pizza. Man o man I ate
> > over
> > > half a pizza an I know that waz not a good
> > idea.
> > > My roomate iz already complanin bout tha
> smell
> > in
> > > tha bathroom, he sayz I blew it up! Im gonna
> > set
> > > here an drink a 6 pack of budweizerz in 16
> > ounce
> > > canz an maybe that will make me feel better.
> > > I shore hope yall brown guyz are doin better
> > than
> > > me.
> >
> >
> > Oh my goodness red onion. Can I offer you some
> > midwives for your rectum post care at least?
> That
> > must have really hurt.
> >
> > This forum is more ghetto than a Commodores
> > concert today. Getting ready for a bowel
> buster.
> > Hope you're feeling better brother in bowel!
>
> Hey yo fuck you eh. You son of the bitch. Go to
> fuck your mom you ass hole. Eat the dick of a
> horse. Bafungool!

ba fungul - wow someone from Jersey in the House!

Wow. I don't even know where to start.

Its pretty simple. Eat a healthy diet, and visit your local grocer. Giant is one that quite often has a nutritional specialist. Once a month at certain stores you can interact with some of these people, and you'll be much healthier. Plus walking the grocery cart will help with weight loss.

Advise Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Its pretty simple. Eat a healthy diet, and visit
> your local grocer. Giant is one that quite often
> has a nutritional specialist. Once a month at
> certain stores you can interact with some of these
> people, and you'll be much healthier. Plus walking
> the grocery cart will help with weight loss.


What you say is true for most people. What you say is not true for all people. When you grow up you will understand.