That is hilarious.

Started on a fiber heavy diet. Its not great but hoping for at least some relief. Not sure if it will help anyone, but my physician told me many have found assistance with green tea. Apparently the anti oxidants are a natural stool softener.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> jhonny bravo Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Biggest dump in the whole USA
> > by,
> > Jhonny Bravo
> >
> >
> > Shine on me sunshine
> > Walk with me world
> > It's a skippidity do da day
> > I just took the biggest dump in the whole
> U.S.A.
> >
> > Good morning morning
> > Hello sunshine
> > Wake up sleepy head
> > Why'd we move that box of Depends so far away
> from
> > the bed
> > Just one more minute
> > That's why we moved it
> > One more push or two
> > Do you love taking a big number 4 next to me
> > As much as I love taking one next to you
> >
> > You make the coffee
> > I'll make the bed
> > I'll wipe your ass
> > And you wipe mine
> > Now tell me the truth
> > Does your ass feel funny
> > Honey it's almost nine
> > Now you be careful
> > Gotta go, I love you
> > Have a beautiful day,
> > And enjoy having taken the biggest dump in the
> > whole U.S.A.
>
> Oh my goodness, thank you for some needed levity
> in an increasingly hostile environment. Bravo!

1. Its not funny, at all.
2. Scat fetish poem
3. erotic to green onion and others here but not funny and basically elementary school bathroom humor.
4. Scat FREAKS enjoy

Who wants to join in on a shit in tomorrow afternoon at Fairfax Wal-Mart? I don't like how they treat their employees, so its time to eat greasy nasty foods and foul it up. 3 on tomorrow drop a heavy stinky mess with Gluttony of Bowels me and others!

Brown Hammer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who wants to join in on a shit in tomorrow
> afternoon at Fairfax Wal-Mart? I don't like how
> they treat their employees, so its time to eat
> greasy nasty foods and foul it up. 3 on tomorrow
> drop a heavy stinky mess with Gluttony of Bowels
> me and others!


Can I eat the lump of shit you drop and rub it in my chest?

David Bowie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Control to Major Tom
> Brown Control to Major Tom
> Take your laxative and put the toilet seat down
> Brown Control to Major Tom
> Commencing countdown, Vent fan on
> Check for shit stains and may God's love be with
> you
> Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three,
> Two, One, Lift-off
> This is Brown Control to Major Tom
> You've really made the grade
> And the plumbers want to know what dish you ate
> Now it's time to leave the stall if you dare
> This is Major Tom to Brown Control
> I'm straining through the floor
> And my shit stinks in a most peculiar way
> And my colon feels very different today
> For here
> Am I sitting in a shit can
> Far behind the office
> My butthole is through
> And there's nothing I can do
> Though I ate that burrito hours ago
> I'm feeling very ill
> And I think this toilet is going to overflow
> Tell my wife I love her very much (she knows!)
> Brown Control to Major Tom
> The toilets clogged, there's something wrong
> Can you hear me, Major Tom?
> Can you hear me, Major Tom?
> Can you hear me, Major Tom?
> Can you hear....
> Here am I shitting in my tin can
> Far behind the office
> My butthole is through
> And there's nothing I can do


NICE!

I ate at McDonald's. My poor bowels!

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Hammer Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Who wants to join in on a shit in tomorrow
> > afternoon at Fairfax Wal-Mart? I don't like how
> > they treat their employees, so its time to eat
> > greasy nasty foods and foul it up. 3 on
> tomorrow
> > drop a heavy stinky mess with Gluttony of
> Bowels
> > me and others!
>
>
> Can I eat the lump of shit you drop and rub it in
> my chest?

Um no. You need to stop pretending to be me and if you have nothing positive/productive to say fuck off.

ooohh my bowels, my bowels! I eat processed foods constantly and never workout - ive been doing this for 30 years and my poop is not right. Help me I dont know what to do. People tell me eat fresh veg and fruit, limit meat and eat few if any processed foods but Its Haaaaaarrrrd :{

I even once only ate fast food once a day for a week and it didnt help me. Maybe if I met some of you at the Holiday Inn with some shower curtains and baby wipes it would help a little.

Thanks for all your support.

OO

Oblivious Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ooohh my bowels, my bowels! I eat processed foods
> constantly and never workout - ive been doing
> this for 30 years and my poop is not right. Help
> me I dont know what to do. People tell me eat
> fresh veg and fruit, limit meat and eat few if any
> processed foods but Its Haaaaaarrrrd :{
>
> I even once only ate fast food once a day for a
> week and it didnt help me. Maybe if I met some of
> you at the Holiday Inn with some shower curtains
> and baby wipes it would help a little.
>
> Thanks for all your support.
>
> OO

Dumb as a box of rocks. On that note I'm about to drop a boulder after eating bowel friendly foods.

Hoping you good GO!

Wish I had midwives or some kind of support team while on the toilet. Even just someone to hold my hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that one really caused angst very real pain. Going to take a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole really hurts.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wish I had midwives or some kind of support team
> while on the toilet. Even just someone to hold my
> hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that one
> really caused angst very real pain. Going to take
> a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole really
> hurts.


Very erotic tale. Please share the olfactory and consistency quality. Please elaborate as many of the BIBs here need something to FAP to. All very exciting Im sure...

Wake up at 5am drive to work,
boss putz me in bayz,
customerz put bayz in bowelz for payz,
tipz on side, wipers in bowelz,
filterz in bowelz,
Michelob Brewing Company in fridge,
leaking 10w30w from bowelz on couch.

Tomorrow more pounding in bayz for payz.

^not as good as the original fake red onion but some important work nontheless.

get a fork Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Wish I had midwives or some kind of support
> team
> > while on the toilet. Even just someone to hold
> my
> > hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that one
> > really caused angst very real pain. Going to
> take
> > a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole really
> > hurts.
>
>
> Very erotic tale. Please share the olfactory and
> consistency quality. Please elaborate as many of
> the BIBs here need something to FAP to. All very
> exciting Im sure...

Go fuck yourself. Seriously. Or get some mental health help for mocking people with IBS.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> get a fork Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Green Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Wish I had midwives or some kind of support
> > team
> > > while on the toilet. Even just someone to
> hold
> > my
> > > hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that
> one
> > > really caused angst very real pain. Going to
> > take
> > > a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole
> really
> > > hurts.
> >
> >
> > Very erotic tale. Please share the olfactory
> and
> > consistency quality. Please elaborate as many
> of
> > the BIBs here need something to FAP to. All
> very
> > exciting Im sure...
>
> Go fuck yourself. Seriously. Or get some mental
> health help for mocking people with IBS.

you seem stressed - how are your bowels?

ewwwwww - I thought this was a thread about food that doesnt agree with you not poo. You people are sick.

Sandra H Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ewwwwww - I thought this was a thread about food
> that doesnt agree with you not poo. You people
> are sick.


No we aren't sick Sandra, although we do suffer from IBS and I believe one person here has a celiac condition, and another is incontinent.

This is about foods, our experiences, and ultimately what these along with day to day triggers, can do to our bowels. Feel free to discuss food and bowel problems you have, as most people are very supportive here.

Sandra H Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ewwwwww - I thought this was a thread about food
> that doesnt agree with you not poo. You people
> are sick.


Sandra, how does your feces taste? Can I try a sample?

Does anybody know where any local construction sites are? I plan to grab a long spoon, lock myself in one of the portable potties and have myself an all u can eat poop feast!

Not the freshest, but always an excellent variety. Anyone wanna join me?

Sandra as you can clearly see, we are mocked by sick people who mock us. They are the ones whom are gross.

Drinking beerz. Sore bowelz many signature changez. Got nice chairz place bottom on. Got moneyz for Pabstz beerz. You work hard with ragz in teethz you get moneyz.

I do not understand how you people sleep at night - saying all these disgusting things. Children can access this site without parental controls you know. You speak of bodily functions in a way that is very undignified and revolting.

I shall not return to this discussion but I ask you all to think about those that can and do access this site.

Sandra H Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I do not understand how you people sleep at night
> - saying all these disgusting things. Children
> can access this site without parental controls you
> know. You speak of bodily functions in a way that
> is very undignified and revolting.
>
> I shall not return to this discussion but I ask
> you all to think about those that can and do
> access this site.


Get off your high horse. If you think our bowel problems are disgusting, there are far worse things here for you to nitpick about.

There are pictures of pornographic materials, some sick bastards put up imagery of humans and animals in sex acts.

Free speech is free speech. That is what the underground is about, that's right the first amendment. Whether its liked or loathed this site provides people with IBS an outlet, a support network.

If you don't like it go somewhere else, or feel free to weigh in on far more disgusting topics than bowel issues too. I don't particularly care for the pornography and other lewd posts here, but it is their 1st amendment rights period.

Why don't you go ban some books at a school library somewhere, like in that scene from "Field of Dreams?" This site is for everyone and the administrator of this site gives you, me and others our first amendment rights. He should be commended.

This is not the Soviet Union or North Korea for that matter. Its the United States of America, where our Constitution allows for the freedom of speech. Here its about events and opinions of Fairfax county residents. Perhaps a trip to a doctors office with IBS patients would give you a bit of sensitivity that seems to be lacking. How are your bowels and God bless the land of the free

By the way, its also your right to put a service on your internet called a filter, to ban certain sites that you can't handle. All of us have bowels, deal with it and put on your big girl pants.

Also, Its not fair for you to come in here and insult other people's way of life. If I decide I want to eat other people's feces and rub it all over my body, that is my choice and none of your business. Besides, until you have devoured a large steamy turd and savored its goodness, you will never know what you are missing out on. Just dont judge me for it. That goes for all of you.

I think this diet while helpful a bit is causing excessive gas.

You put the oilz in the carz. All day lots of customerz. You put your right foot outz. Tapz your legz. Okay you want that servicez. You pay extra moneyz you get specialz signaturez servicez.

Last night was brutal, as I believe the Subway Italian bread is what caused buyers remorse. Still feel pain in my belly this morning.

Dave Johns Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Last night was brutal, as I believe the Subway
> Italian bread is what caused buyers remorse. Still
> feel pain in my belly this morning.


I would have thought a decent choice, but bread of any type causes issues. Hope you feel better ASAP.

looks like Green is a FECES Freedom Fighter. NICE

Sandra H Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I do not understand how you people sleep at night
> - saying all these disgusting things. Children
> can access this site without parental controls you
> know. You speak of bodily functions in a way that
> is very undignified and revolting.
>
> I shall not return to this discussion but I ask
> you all to think about those that can and do
> access this site.

Sandra,

Ill think of you having a bowel movement on my chest area while I lie in a bathtub then you using your foot to smear it the length of my body. Oooooo, shivers!

oh god that is disgusting.

jcc Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> oh god that is disgusting.


What do you expect from a bunch of psychos who write such nonsense?

yes but its all about our IBS etc. Right. Sure.

Hot Fudge Sandra Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sandra H Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I do not understand how you people sleep at
> night
> > - saying all these disgusting things. Children
> > can access this site without parental controls
> you
> > know. You speak of bodily functions in a way
> that
> > is very undignified and revolting.
> >
> > I shall not return to this discussion but I ask
> > you all to think about those that can and do
> > access this site.
>
> Sandra,
>
> Ill think of you having a bowel movement on my
> chest area while I lie in a bathtub then you using
> your foot to smear it the length of my body.
> Oooooo, shivers!


Imitation is a form of flattery asshole.

And speaking of assholes, this thread is about our bowels, foods, and burdens.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hot Fudge Sandra Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Sandra H Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > I do not understand how you people sleep at
> > night
> > > - saying all these disgusting things.
> Children
> > > can access this site without parental
> controls
> > you
> > > know. You speak of bodily functions in a way
> > that
> > > is very undignified and revolting.
> > >
> > > I shall not return to this discussion but I
> ask
> > > you all to think about those that can and do
> > > access this site.
> >
> > Sandra,
> >
> > Ill think of you having a bowel movement on my
> > chest area while I lie in a bathtub then you
> using
> > your foot to smear it the length of my body.
> > Oooooo, shivers!
>
>
> Imitation is a form of flattery asshole.
>
> And speaking of assholes, this thread is about our
> bowels, foods, and burdens.

So you admit user 'Hot Fudge Sandra' was imitating you with his scat fantasy - interesting...

Outside bayz today in underwearz. Flipping signz for oil changez. See me behind bayz for extra signature servicez. Have couponz take moneyz in for beerz.

Walk a mile in my shoes. Are you incontinent? Be thankful

Well my Dad loves horses and he wants to take me and my Mom to the Virginia horse center in Lexington this coming weekend. This will involve a 2 night stay in a motel! I told my Dad that I cannot stand it when his ass starts percolating butt coffee and I do not want to stay in the same tiny room at the super8 motel. He does not want to pay for another room. I am going to complain and cry for the next few days to see if I can break him down.

spring onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well my Dad loves horses and he wants to take me
> and my Mom to the Virginia horse center in
> Lexington this coming weekend. This will involve a
> 2 night stay in a motel! I told my Dad that I
> cannot stand it when his ass starts percolating
> butt coffee and I do not want to stay in the same
> tiny room at the super8 motel. He does not want to
> pay for another room. I am going to complain and
> cry for the next few days to see if I can break
> him down.

I'm a bit old, but that chain has been around awhile. Perhaps you could bribe the clerk with $40 cash for another room. I'm pretty sure the hotel clerk, if you share these horrors with him, will probably take a bribe and fix you up in one of their better rooms.

Have you told your dad about our support group? Here we could help him at least with scent elimination ideas. His bowels cause him suffering, and from what it sounds like your mother and you. How does she feel about his bowels?

Out of The Closet Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hot Fudge Sandra Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Sandra H Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > I do not understand how you people sleep at
> > > night
> > > > - saying all these disgusting things.
> > Children
> > > > can access this site without parental
> > controls
> > > you
> > > > know. You speak of bodily functions in a
> way
> > > that
> > > > is very undignified and revolting.
> > > >
> > > > I shall not return to this discussion but I
> > ask
> > > > you all to think about those that can and
> do
> > > > access this site.
> > >
> > > Sandra,
> > >
> > > Ill think of you having a bowel movement on
> my
> > > chest area while I lie in a bathtub then you
> > using
> > > your foot to smear it the length of my body.
> > > Oooooo, shivers!
> >
> >
> > Imitation is a form of flattery asshole.
> >
> > And speaking of assholes, this thread is about
> our
> > bowels, foods, and burdens.
>
> So you admit user 'Hot Fudge Sandra' was imitating
> you with his scat fantasy - interesting...

There's no scat fantasy here, this is a bowel health thread. And your imitation of me and probably others, indicates a depraved personality. Maybe you should get counseling.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> spring onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Well my Dad loves horses and he wants to take
> me
> > and my Mom to the Virginia horse center in
> > Lexington this coming weekend. This will involve
> a
> > 2 night stay in a motel! I told my Dad that I
> > cannot stand it when his ass starts percolating
> > butt coffee and I do not want to stay in the
> same
> > tiny room at the super8 motel. He does not want
> to
> > pay for another room. I am going to complain
> and
> > cry for the next few days to see if I can break
> > him down.
>
> I'm a bit old, but that chain has been around
> awhile. Perhaps you could bribe the clerk with $40
> cash for another room. I'm pretty sure the hotel
> clerk, if you share these horrors with him, will
> probably take a bribe and fix you up in one of
> their better rooms.
>
> Have you told your dad about our support group?
> Here we could help him at least with scent
> elimination ideas. His bowels cause him suffering,
> and from what it sounds like your mother and you.
> How does she feel about his bowels?

My Mom is a retired operating room nurse and I think all the horrific smells along with all the chemicals she was exposed to all those years have weakened her sense of smell.
We have been to these horse shows before and there is a buffet eatery called "Country Cookin" just behind the motel. My Dad goes in there and tears that buffet up! Then his ass starts busting loose and makes me consider suicide when trapped in the tiny super8 room all night.

spring onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > spring onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Well my Dad loves horses and he wants to take
> > me
> > > and my Mom to the Virginia horse center in
> > > Lexington this coming weekend. This will
> involve
> > a
> > > 2 night stay in a motel! I told my Dad that I
> > > cannot stand it when his ass starts
> percolating
> > > butt coffee and I do not want to stay in the
> > same
> > > tiny room at the super8 motel. He does not
> want
> > to
> > > pay for another room. I am going to complain
> > and
> > > cry for the next few days to see if I can
> break
> > > him down.
> >
> > I'm a bit old, but that chain has been around
> > awhile. Perhaps you could bribe the clerk with
> $40
> > cash for another room. I'm pretty sure the
> hotel
> > clerk, if you share these horrors with him,
> will
> > probably take a bribe and fix you up in one of
> > their better rooms.
> >
> > Have you told your dad about our support group?
> > Here we could help him at least with scent
> > elimination ideas. His bowels cause him
> suffering,
> > and from what it sounds like your mother and
> you.
> > How does she feel about his bowels?
>
> My Mom is a retired operating room nurse and I
> think all the horrific smells along with all the
> chemicals she was exposed to all those years have
> weakened her sense of smell.
> We have been to these horse shows before and there
> is a buffet eatery called "Country Cookin" just
> behind the motel. My Dad goes in there and tears
> that buffet up! Then his ass starts busting loose
> and makes me consider suicide when trapped in the
> tiny super8 room all night.


Ok if you are thinking of suicide, please call 911 or go to an emergency room. It wouldn't be the first time foul bowels drove someone mad.

Does your mom wear a breathing mask or some other medical contraption to put up with his beastly bowel odor?

Country Cookin=bowel hell times a million. Would it help if we did an intervention for your dad? Maybe we could bring him some bowel friendly foods to keep the paint from peeling, or even diplomatically bring up his bowels and what they are doing to others.

Shit in at Maggianos or 4 Sisters?

Brown Hammer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Shit in at Maggianos or 4 Sisters?


Ok please make a new thread as this is about bowel problems, not purposefully stinking up places of business.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Hammer Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Shit in at Maggianos or 4 Sisters?
>
>
> Ok please make a new thread as this is about bowel
> problems, not purposefully stinking up places of
> business.

Brown Hammer and I have every right to advertise here. I ate lots of pizza. Its gonna smell!

Im a little curious so here goes - when you guys hook up for erotic scat play do you ever vomit from the smell or proximity to feces? Seems like this would be a natural reaction. I get that green and others are aroused by solid human waste but do your natural instincts cause you to retch or vomit? Is that all part of the program?

curious Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Im a little curious so here goes - when you guys
> hook up for erotic scat play do you ever vomit
> from the smell or proximity to feces? Seems like
> this would be a natural reaction. I get that
> green and others are aroused by solid human waste
> but do your natural instincts cause you to retch
> or vomit? Is that all part of the program?

Probably jenkem in the mix

curious Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Im a little curious so here goes - when you guys
> hook up for erotic scat play do you ever vomit
> from the smell or proximity to feces? Seems like
> this would be a natural reaction. I get that
> green and others are aroused by solid human waste
> but do your natural instincts cause you to retch
> or vomit? Is that all part of the program?


When you eat as much feces as I have, it eventually all smells and tastes great. It is likw chocolate to me these days.

Had a quick question about some problems Ive been having in the bathroom but this looks like the wrong kind of thread for that. Looks more like an exotic pleasure discussion. *sigh* off to look for places with others that suffer and have advise.

Tummy Troubles Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Had a quick question about some problems Ive been
> having in the bathroom but this looks like the
> wrong kind of thread for that. Looks more like an
> exotic pleasure discussion. *sigh* off to look
> for places with others that suffer and have
> advise.

This is the place despite people imitating me with disgusting scenarios. How can I or others help?

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Tummy Troubles Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Had a quick question about some problems Ive
> been
> > having in the bathroom but this looks like the
> > wrong kind of thread for that. Looks more like
> an
> > exotic pleasure discussion. *sigh* off to look
> > for places with others that suffer and have
> > advise.
>
> This is the place despite people imitating me with
> disgusting scenarios. How can I or others help?


I certainly do not want any advice from you after seeing all of your posts about scat fantasy.

I ate McDonald's Triple Whopper. My poor bowels! What was I thinking?

Diced Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I ate McDonald's Triple Whopper. My poor bowels!
> What was I thinking?


For the love of God diced - you may be in more trouble than you think! McDonalds doesnt carry the Triple Whopper. You picked up someone's rejected sandwich from Burger King. There are very few BK lounges in the area so I suspect the Tri-Whopper you ate was of an older vintage.

do you have any Syrup of ipecac, a garden-hose-enema attachment and some shower curtains available???

First Aid Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Diced Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I ate McDonald's Triple Whopper. My poor
> bowels!
> > What was I thinking?
>
>
> For the love of God diced - you may be in more
> trouble than you think! McDonalds doesnt carry
> the Triple Whopper. You picked up someone's
> rejected sandwich from Burger King. There are
> very few BK lounges in the area so I suspect the
> Tri-Whopper you ate was of an older vintage.
>
> do you have any Syrup of ipecac, a
> garden-hose-enema attachment and some shower
> curtains available???


I rest my case.

Anon Doc. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> First Aid Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Diced Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > I ate McDonald's Triple Whopper. My poor
> > bowels!
> > > What was I thinking?
> >
> >
> > For the love of God diced - you may be in more
> > trouble than you think! McDonalds doesnt carry
> > the Triple Whopper. You picked up someone's
> > rejected sandwich from Burger King. There are
> > very few BK lounges in the area so I suspect
> the
> > Tri-Whopper you ate was of an older vintage.
> >
> > do you have any Syrup of ipecac, a
> > garden-hose-enema attachment and some shower
> > curtains available???
>
>
> I rest my case.

not sure what your case is but it might be some good advise if you ate a triple whopper at McDonald's - your digestive system wont be 'Lovin' it'

Scat party at green onion house. Bring a full butt and Vaseline!

Imy4 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Scat party at green onion house. Bring a full butt
> and Vaseline!

Bro, Vaseline is not Kosher for these parties - virgin coconut oil is preferred. Vaseline gets eaten and people get sick and we run out of shower curtains and kitty litter half way through the night's fun. Not good.

Also pregame meals should be high in fiber (oatmeal) and low in saturated fats (these result in greasy 'levins).

Got in work troublez. A wife caught her husband in my bowelz. Thought she was in lobby drinking sodaz. She catch us in bayz getting my bombayz plowed. Small tipz today.

That was a hideous dump. I have not scrapped like that in a long time, and wondering if that could count for weight watchers points.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Got in work troublez. A wife caught her husband in
> my bowelz. Thought she was in lobby drinking
> sodaz. She catch us in bayz getting my bombayz
> plowed. Small tipz today.


Our resident paramour poet - what a tale sir! What fantastic yarn!

The diet continues but not seeing any tangible results yet. Trying to stay positive but still am constipated and lots of gas. Going to continue but it is frustrating.

greasy 'levins Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Imy4 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Scat party at green onion house. Bring a full
> butt
> > and Vaseline!
>
> Bro, Vaseline is not Kosher for these parties -
> virgin coconut oil is preferred. Vaseline gets
> eaten and people get sick and we run out of shower
> curtains and kitty litter half way through the
> night's fun. Not good.
>
> Also pregame meals should be high in fiber
> (oatmeal) and low in saturated fats (these result
> in greasy 'levins).


great example of this diseased thread. WTF is with you people here?

jcc Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> greasy 'levins Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Imy4 Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Scat party at green onion house. Bring a full
> > butt
> > > and Vaseline!
> >
> > Bro, Vaseline is not Kosher for these parties -
> > virgin coconut oil is preferred. Vaseline gets
> > eaten and people get sick and we run out of
> shower
> > curtains and kitty litter half way through the
> > night's fun. Not good.
> >
> > Also pregame meals should be high in fiber
> > (oatmeal) and low in saturated fats (these
> result
> > in greasy 'levins).
>
>
> great example of this diseased thread. WTF is
> with you people here?

If you do not like the way a steamy shit log tastes and feels going down your throat, you are not one of us and do not belong here.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> jcc Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > greasy 'levins Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Imy4 Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > Scat party at green onion house. Bring a
> full
> > > butt
> > > > and Vaseline!
> > >
> > > Bro, Vaseline is not Kosher for these parties
> -
> > > virgin coconut oil is preferred. Vaseline
> gets
> > > eaten and people get sick and we run out of
> > shower
> > > curtains and kitty litter half way through
> the
> > > night's fun. Not good.
> > >
> > > Also pregame meals should be high in fiber
> > > (oatmeal) and low in saturated fats (these
> > result
> > > in greasy 'levins).
> >
> >
> > great example of this diseased thread. WTF is
> > with you people here?
>
> If you do not like the way a steamy shit log
> tastes and feels going down your throat, you are
> not one of us and do not belong here.


'pregame meals' wow that took this thing to a whole nother level man.

Buford Tee Justice Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The diet continues but not seeing any tangible
> results yet. Trying to stay positive but still am
> constipated and lots of gas. Going to continue but
> it is frustrating.

Yeah it can be but hope it works out in the long run. My diet is bland but still releasing car sized shits.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Buford Tee Justice Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > The diet continues but not seeing any tangible
> > results yet. Trying to stay positive but still
> am
> > constipated and lots of gas. Going to continue
> but
> > it is frustrating.
>
> Yeah it can be but hope it works out in the long
> run. My diet is bland but still releasing car
> sized shits.


Are these 'diets' for pregame ass-play? Is the goal firmer or loose stools for erotic encounters of the rear end type?

Inquiring Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Buford Tee Justice Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > The diet continues but not seeing any
> tangible
> > > results yet. Trying to stay positive but
> still
> > am
> > > constipated and lots of gas. Going to
> continue
> > but
> > > it is frustrating.
> >
> > Yeah it can be but hope it works out in the
> long
> > run. My diet is bland but still releasing car
> > sized shits.
>
>
> Are these 'diets' for pregame ass-play? Is the
> goal firmer or loose stools for erotic encounters
> of the rear end type?


It's your freedom of speech to be an asshole. All you do is mock those of us with IBS. Feel free to show your sick attitude. None of us are into your scat fixation but its a free country I guess, and here you can feel wonderful about your miserable pathetic life.

Let them bash us Green. It means we are succeeding against those with superior bowels as Brown Onion used to say!

You pull up your carz. I drop my drawerz. You get more than oil changez here. You get at my insidez and I get beer moneyz!

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Inquiring Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Green Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Buford Tee Justice Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > The diet continues but not seeing any
> > tangible
> > > > results yet. Trying to stay positive but
> > still
> > > am
> > > > constipated and lots of gas. Going to
> > continue
> > > but
> > > > it is frustrating.
> > >
> > > Yeah it can be but hope it works out in the
> > long
> > > run. My diet is bland but still releasing car
> > > sized shits.
> >
> >
> > Are these 'diets' for pregame ass-play? Is the
> > goal firmer or loose stools for erotic
> encounters
> > of the rear end type?
>
>
> It's your freedom of speech to be an asshole. All
> you do is mock those of us with IBS. Feel free to
> show your sick attitude. None of us are into your
> scat fixation but its a free country I guess, and
> here you can feel wonderful about your miserable
> pathetic life.

iF YOU are not fixated on scat why do you talk about it all the time?

"That was a hideous dump. I have not scrapped like that in a long time, and wondering if that could count for weight watchers points."

"Wish I had midwives or some kind of support team while on the toilet. Even just someone to hold my hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that one really caused angst very real pain. Going to take a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole really hurts."

and on and on it goes...

wakinup? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Inquiring Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Green Onion Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > Buford Tee Justice Wrote:
> > > >
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > >
> > > > -----
> > > > > The diet continues but not seeing any
> > > tangible
> > > > > results yet. Trying to stay positive but
> > > still
> > > > am
> > > > > constipated and lots of gas. Going to
> > > continue
> > > > but
> > > > > it is frustrating.
> > > >
> > > > Yeah it can be but hope it works out in the
> > > long
> > > > run. My diet is bland but still releasing
> car
> > > > sized shits.
> > >
> > >
> > > Are these 'diets' for pregame ass-play? Is
> the
> > > goal firmer or loose stools for erotic
> > encounters
> > > of the rear end type?
> >
> >
> > It's your freedom of speech to be an asshole.
> All
> > you do is mock those of us with IBS. Feel free
> to
> > show your sick attitude. None of us are
> into your
> > scat fixation but its a free country I
> guess, and
> > here you can feel wonderful about your
> miserable
> > pathetic life.
>
> iF YOU are not fixated on scat why do you talk
> about it all the time?
>
> "That was a hideous dump. I have not scrapped like
> that in a long time, and wondering if that could
> count for weight watchers points."
>
> "Wish I had midwives or some kind of support team
> while on the toilet. Even just someone to hold my
> hand, take the tears out of my eyes as that one
> really caused angst very real pain. Going to take
> a sitz bath as what's left of my asshole really
> hurts."
>
> and on and on it goes...


You are part of the problem. Not part of the solution

Well we are leaving for the horse show tomorrow. My Dad refuses to let me get my own motel room. He wants to get down there by noon so we can go straight to country cookin. I enjoy the horse shows but I think I am too old to stay with my Mom and Dad in a motel room, I will be 14 years old next week! My Dad will fart all night, I pray that the super 8 has windows in their rooms that will open. Maybe he will let me sleep in the car.

spring onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well we are leaving for the horse show tomorrow.
> My Dad refuses to let me get my own motel room. He
> wants to get down there by noon so we can go
> straight to country cookin. I enjoy the horse
> shows but I think I am too old to stay with my Mom
> and Dad in a motel room, I will be 14 years old
> next week! My Dad will fart all night, I pray that
> the super 8 has windows in their rooms that will
> open. Maybe he will let me sleep in the car.


what a bull shit post by green onion. Is this prep for the Holiday Inn shower curtain and kitty litter party tonight?

spring onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well we are leaving for the horse show tomorrow.
> My Dad refuses to let me get my own motel room. He
> wants to get down there by noon so we can go
> straight to country cookin. I enjoy the horse
> shows but I think I am too old to stay with my Mom
> and Dad in a motel room, I will be 14 years old
> next week! My Dad will fart all night, I pray that
> the super 8 has windows in their rooms that will
> open. Maybe he will let me sleep in the car.

Did you see my post about slipping $40 bribe money to the motel clerk for another room?

If stuck with his stinky ass, don't light a match.

You walk in the bayz. Boss likez my extra servicez. He makez me do thingz I don't like but have to make moneyz homiez.

An awful commute on the silver line. I wish metro would put bathrooms on the trains. Is there any way to petition for that?

Regrets, oh the regrets. I had a basket of fried shrimp this evening and chased it with a root bear. I can already feel my stomach churning. The fructose-brine one-two punch is bound to bury me. Better charge my iPad for the toilet...

Hz2Pee Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Regrets, oh the regrets. I had a basket of fried
> shrimp this evening and chased it with a root
> bear. I can already feel my stomach churning. The
> fructose-brine one-two punch is bound to bury me.
> Better charge my iPad for the toilet...

@brownsplatter I think metro should put bathrooms in every rail car, as IBS falls under Americans with Disabilities Act.

Good luck! Hope you have a great selection of artists and let us know when safe. We wouldn't want your bathroom confused with saber rattling by North Korea.

Code words bathroom, selection, safe.

Fisting? Thoughts?

Hz2Pee Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Regrets, oh the regrets. I had a basket of fried
> shrimp this evening and chased it with a root
> bear. I can already feel my stomach churning. The
> fructose-brine one-two punch is bound to bury me.
> Better charge my iPad for the toilet...


Hmmm, fried shrimp; root beer - Long John Silver's? What kind of idiot eats that kind of disgusting processed bullshit? You probably already have colon cancer and of course heart disease. Shitting is the least of your fucking problems pal. Are you the guy that works at Jiffy Lube?

BTW any normal human would get the shits eating that food - its not IBS, just BS.

its not IBS Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hz2Pee Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Regrets, oh the regrets. I had a basket of
> fried
> > shrimp this evening and chased it with a root
> > bear. I can already feel my stomach churning.
> The
> > fructose-brine one-two punch is bound to bury
> me.
> > Better charge my iPad for the toilet...
>
>
> Hmmm, fried shrimp; root beer - Long John
> Silver's? What kind of idiot eats that kind of
> disgusting processed bullshit? You probably
> already have colon cancer and of course heart
> disease. Shitting is the least of your fucking
> problems pal. Are you the guy that works at Jiffy
> Lube?
>
> BTW any normal human would get the shits eating
> that food - its not IBS, just BS.


It may or may not be IBS related. While this isn't apples and steamed veggies, everyone's bowels act differently. Now yes, this is a food selection I wouldn't place upon my bowels. Yet to judge or surmise without medical training is incorrect.

Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My poor bowels!

Diced Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My poor bowels!


Because you're human. While I cannot in good faith recommend a bowel basher such as that, my hope is your bowels make it through this purge.

Tuning the living room grandfather clock today, and hoping the falafel I ate cooperates.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Diced Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My poor
> bowels!
>
>
> Because you're human a fucking idiot. While I cannot in good faith
> recommend a bowel basher such as that, my hope is
> your bowels make it through this purge you die of dysentery.
>
> Tuning the living room grandfather clock today,
> and hoping the falafel I ate cooperates.

cat poaching Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Diced Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My poor
> > bowels!
> >
> >
> > Because you're human a fucking
> idiot. While I cannot in good faith
> > recommend a bowel basher such as that, my hope
> is
> > your bowels make it through this purge
> you die of dysentery.
> >
> > Tuning the living room grandfather clock today,
> > and hoping the falafel I ate cooperates.


Wow you are a very bitter person. So much sadness even with excellent bowels. Smile man geez.

Scatfest fantasy this weekend. Everybody is welcome to come over to my house to use me like a toilet. If you can't poop I will help you.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> cat poaching Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Green Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Diced Onion Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My poor
> > > bowels!
> > >
> > >
> > > Because you're human a fucking
> > idiot. While I cannot in good faith
> > > recommend a bowel basher such as that, my
> hope
> > is
> > > your bowels make it through this purge
> > you die of dysentery.
> > >
> > > Tuning the living room grandfather clock
> today,
> > > and hoping the falafel I ate cooperates.
>
>
> Wow you are a very bitter person. So much sadness
> even with excellent bowels. Smile man geez.


I see your point - my words were caustic. Honestly I think it is frustration. Not just with this silly thread but with Americans and our health. People suffer illness from diet, including bowel trouble.

An estimated 160 million Americans are either obese or overweight. Nearly three-quarters of American men and more than 60% of women are obese or overweight. These are also major challenges for America’s children – nearly 30% of boys and girls under age 20 are either obese or overweight, up from 19% in 1980.

Maybe its just joking, but I take them at their word when posters describe eating truly unhealthy foods. Then they complain it will cause them bowel trouble. People we know as posters have literally paid the ultimate price for eating poorly.

So, yes, Im unhappy about it. Mostly its unhappiness about being out of control. Of a world where logic and reason are seen as impossible things and eating one's self to death is simply an unavoidable thing.

Time to be out in Underwearz. Out spinning signz. Give you extra signature servicez. Yes my bowelz will hurt, but no painz no gainz.

Green Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> spring onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Well we are leaving for the horse show
> tomorrow.
> > My Dad refuses to let me get my own motel room.
> He
> > wants to get down there by noon so we can go
> > straight to country cookin. I enjoy the horse
> > shows but I think I am too old to stay with my
> Mom
> > and Dad in a motel room, I will be 14 years old
> > next week! My Dad will fart all night, I pray
> that
> > the super 8 has windows in their rooms that
> will
> > open. Maybe he will let me sleep in the car.
>
> Did you see my post about slipping $40 bribe money
> to the motel clerk for another room?
>
> If stuck with his stinky ass, don't light a match.

I called the super 8 and they do have windows that open so that is a good thing. I brought my lawn mowing money and will see if my Dad lets me pay for a seperate room. We are going to country cookin now so my Dad can load up on gassy foods. Maybe at least I can get my own room tomorow night.

Serious Subject Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > cat poaching Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Green Onion Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > Diced Onion Wrote:
> > > >
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > >
> > > > -----
> > > > > Why did I eat a sausage mcgriddle? My
> poor
> > > > bowels!
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > Because you're human a fucking
> > > idiot. While I cannot in good faith
> > > > recommend a bowel basher such as that, my
> > hope
> > > is
> > > > your bowels make it through this
> purge
> > > you die of dysentery.
> > > >
> > > > Tuning the living room grandfather clock
> > today,
> > > > and hoping the falafel I ate cooperates.
> >
> >
> > Wow you are a very bitter person. So much
> sadness
> > even with excellent bowels. Smile man geez.
>
>
> I see your point - my words were caustic.
> Honestly I think it is frustration. Not just with
> this silly thread but with Americans and our
> health. People suffer illness from diet,
> including bowel trouble.
>
> An estimated 160 million Americans are either
> obese or overweight. Nearly three-quarters of
> American men and more than 60% of women are obese
> or overweight. These are also major challenges for
> America’s children – nearly 30% of boys and
> girls under age 20 are either obese or overweight,
> up from 19% in 1980.
>
> Maybe its just joking, but I take them at their
> word when posters describe eating truly unhealthy
> foods. Then they complain it will cause them bowel
> trouble. People we know as posters have literally
> paid the ultimate price for eating poorly.
>
> So, yes, Im unhappy about it. Mostly its
> unhappiness about being out of control. Of a world
> where logic and reason are seen as impossible
> things and eating one's self to death is simply an
> unavoidable thing.


Slightly caustic? I'd say abusive with a lot of venom. Tyra Banks is not obese, far from it and she's got IBS.

Not all of us are overweight or carrying extra pounds, unless we are carrying a bowling ball in our colons. While you do make some good points, it would be refreshing if you could show more understanding to those of us with IBS. Share your knowledge, without tearing people down, as we are already torn apart.

spring onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Green Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > spring onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Well we are leaving for the horse show
> > tomorrow.
> > > My Dad refuses to let me get my own motel
> room.
> > He
> > > wants to get down there by noon so we can go
> > > straight to country cookin. I enjoy the horse
> > > shows but I think I am too old to stay with
> my
> > Mom
> > > and Dad in a motel room, I will be 14 years
> old
> > > next week! My Dad will fart all night, I pray
> > that
> > > the super 8 has windows in their rooms that
> > will
> > > open. Maybe he will let me sleep in the car.
> >
> > Did you see my post about slipping $40 bribe
> money
> > to the motel clerk for another room?
> >
> > If stuck with his stinky ass, don't light a
> match.
>
> I called the super 8 and they do have windows that
> open so that is a good thing. I brought my lawn
> mowing money and will see if my Dad lets me pay
> for a seperate room. We are going to country
> cookin now so my Dad can load up on gassy foods.
> Maybe at least I can get my own room tomorow
> night.

I'm praying for you spring. That food combination will result in the room looking like Kim Jong's house.

Fuck you!!!!

Got the specialz. Got the signz spinning skillz. On Fairfax Boulevard in only underwearz. Can't miss hairy back and protruding bowelz. Got lubez and change more than oilz.

red onion class of 2006 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Got the specialz. Got the signz spinning skillz.
> On Fairfax Boulevard in only underwearz. Can't
> miss hairy back and protruding bowelz. Got lubez
> and change more than oilz.


A site for sore eyes

Relieved its Friday. No accidents on metro. Hoping they got my email about installing bathrooms on the cars. Will update what they say

@ spring , I hope you make out okay. At least with a open window your Dad will not be able to create the dutch oven effect.

@ green onion, it's nice of you to give helpful advice to spring onion. You are clearly a good person.

@ brown splatter, I wonder if the Americans with disabilities act can be of any help to you. I will ask some of the professors here at JMU about that and get back to you.

I sure do miss the commentary from the real red onion class of 2006. Red if you are out there please try to register a username and let us know how you are doing.

Best wishes to all the true BiB's out there!

Good seeing you dive and I do wonder about ADA.