So, I'm a big fat faggot who spends way too much time looking at personals ads on Craigslist, and I've noticed something that has just been driving me batty. People who say, "I love to travel". My question is, who likes to travel, really? Aside from being expensive, who has the time to take a long road trip (the cost of gas alone would cost you a fortune), or go to Spain, or Morocco, or wherever (I've never been out of the country, but the few times I've looked into it, a plane ticket anyplace abroad is gonna cost you in the thousands of dollars round-trip, not to mention lodging, food, spending money, etc.).

So, I have a theory: nobody in the world has, or has ever had, an original thought. If this 'I love to travel' meme is any indication, it suggests that as a species, homo sapiens do not in fact think for themselves, but rather just repeat things they've heard other people say. And the personals ad is a perfect example of this. People say the same shit over and over again: family is very important to me (no shit, it's called being a human--family is important to everyone), I like to travel (no you don't, it's just some shit you've seen other people say), I like long walks on the beach (you've never even taken a long walk on the beach, you git), I have a sarcastic sense of humor (point of semantic order here--sarcasm is not a positive character trait; you mean to say 'facetious'...sarcasm is irony meant to put down or mock. If you were really sarcastic all the time, people would not like you very much)...

Anyway, I'm all hopped up on goofballs. I'll levy the ridicule upon myself here so you don't have to: "STFU...what the fuck are you talking about?...hey, fuck-stick, this ain't your personal blog...go fuck yourself, faggot". There. Now, talk amongst yourselves.

What are you really trying to tell us here?

My dad was in the Navy so I "traveled" quite a bit. In fact Id say im "well traveled" and I LOVE to travel. But not anymore. Wanna know what Iceland looks like? it looks like Colorado or wyoming only WHITER,,,,,and rocky and icy. Wanna know what Spain looks like? California. Wanna know what Rhode a lodges spain looks like? Southern florida. Wanna know what England looks like? NO YOU DONT REALLY WANNA KNOW WHAT THE UK looks LIKE. Fuck stay home and watch the travel channel mother fucker.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/08/2009 04:32PM by ferfux.

I like being in new places. I just don't care for the process of getting there.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

I don't like traveling. All it does is give me new experiences, people, and things to hate.

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

No, I hear ya. It's not just Craigslist, it's everywhere people have to talk about themselves. "I like reading, traveling, listening to music, and guys/girls with a sense of humor." They may as well also indicate that they enjoy eating, breathing, and free money.

Back when I'd respond to ads, I'd find one or two that didn't sound completely stupid, and I'd send them works of literature. In return, I'd get a "ha ha u sound realy interesting, what do u do??/" Usually, I'd do that for a week then give it up in disgust for 4 months. Maybe I should have posted pictures of my shaved chest and my "guns."

Speaking of which, that's the one question that fills me with red-hot anger every time someone I just met asks it: "What do you do?" I watch these shallow fucks interacting all the time, and it's disgusting how they respond to that question with their job title. "I'm a lawyer," "I'm a nurse," "I'm a consultant," like they ordered their identity out of a catalog.

Whenever someone asks me that, I always respond with, "Do you want to know what I do, or do you want to know what my job is?"

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

MrMephisto Wrote:

> Speaking of which, that's the one question that
> fills me with red-hot anger every time someone I
> just met asks it: "What do you do?" I watch
> these shallow fucks interacting all the time, and
> it's disgusting how they respond to that question
> with their job title. "I'm a lawyer," "I'm a
> nurse," "I'm a consultant," like they ordered
> their identity out of a catalog.
>
> Whenever someone asks me that, I always respond
> with, "Do you want to know what I do, or do you
> want to know what my job is?"

WHoooa Easy there Tyler Derden.

Also...what does this mean: "I'm looking for someone who is real".

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

Here's is what Craigslist ads should say:

"I am interested in girls who are attractive. No fat chicks. You know who you are. I'm not the best looking guy, but I'm okay. I'm kind of funny but in a way that pisses off some people. I like to fuck. And I don't like women with 'issues." Once again, you know who you are. In any case, let's try it out. I'll buy you food and booze. If you like me, we can 'hit it.' If not, you are free to hit the road. In any case, it is only one night out of your life. If it goes well, it may change your life. If not, you will have a story to tell your friends."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

Warhawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Also...what does this mean: "I'm looking for
> someone who is real".


That's code for "a real person who meets my unrealistic expectations."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Warhawk Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Also...what does this mean: "I'm looking for
> > someone who is real".
>
>
> That's code for "a real person who meets my
> unrealistic expectations."


No shit. The true test of a relationship isn't the first month, or even the first 6 months. It's when the people start getting comfortable with each other, stop trying to "woo" each other, and start acting like the people they really are. If some chicks's expectations are too high, of course she's gonna be hurt - repeatedly. There aren't too many guys out there who like long walks on the beach, cuddling, chick flicks, and Pampered Chef parties. Oh, we'll pretend we do until we get what we really want....

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

Warhawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
There aren't
> too many guys out there who like long walks on the
> beach, cuddling, chick flicks, and Pampered Chef
> parties. Oh, we'll pretend we do until we get
> what we really want....


Well, there are. But they are all gay.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

Warhawk Wrote:
If
> some chicks's expectations are too high, of course
> she's gonna be hurt - repeatedly. There aren't
> too many guys out there who like long walks on the
> beach, cuddling, chick flicks, and Pampered Chef
> parties. Oh, we'll pretend we do until we get
> what we really want....


I love all those things.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/08/2009 05:08PM by ferfux.

"I'm really boring. I bore myself constantly. I want to meet someone -anyone- that will entertain me and, hopefully, make me feel less boring. I really hope you like me. LOL! No creeps plz"

Mr. Misery Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So, I'm a big fat faggot who spends way too much
> time looking at personals ads on Craigslist, and
> I've noticed something that has just been driving
> me batty.

I cracked up reading your opening line. That might be a good way to start off a personal ad.

a Mr. Miz klassic

Klassik line Bro...

My first encounter with Mr. Miz... We've come along way, baby...

Signatures are for fags