....... Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> last word
> From: jimmylegs
> To: lizzie
> Date: 08/22/2015 07:33AM
>
> So I just went to the trouble of reading through
> all the old PM's between you and me on this name.
> My conclusion: either you were always fishing for
> info on me for eesh, or (at times at least), you
> had a pang of conscience and meant it when you
> told me not to kill myself. But you also wrote a
> lot of terrible things to people here and have
> been involved in a lot of really bad stuff. This
> is why I named you to Bush last year.
>
> You know what ALL of this looks like:
> misunderstanding. Misunderstanding leading to
> rancor and aggression. You want to claim you never
> really cared in that way, even though you asked to
> move in with me once, then asked if I'd be
> interested in moving into your new house later on,
> had sex (you and I know this), went to talk about
> relationship matters with me and my
> shrink....either you were scamming me, or you did
> care but want to deny it now. Bottom line: this
> all comes down to your anger at me and nothing
> more. I"m resentful of you, but not invested
> enough any longer to be angry. Anger takes up too
> much energy and I don't have that much energy to
> spend on you.
>
> Either way, as far as this legal matter goes, I
> think the fatal mistake was either of us getting
> personally involved with one another. It was bound
> to complicate everything. And I swear to god, I
> had serious problems with your fixation on eesh
> and Katie and constantly saying you wanted to hurt
> or kill them...remember how I pulled over in that
> golf course parking area after I blurted out I'd
> turn you into the police in a heartbeat if you
> ever hurt anyone? You think me saying I was
> struggling with moral issues regarding stuff you
> were saying or doing is just me posturing, getting
> on my high-horse? I have proof that's not the
> case. I was very, very concerned about you doing
> something stupid like getting someone to vandalize
> eesh's property or something, and that coming back
> on me because of our association at the time, or
> just coming back on you, because at the time I
> cared and didn't want you to get into trouble.
>
> More important, I began to seriously not know what
> you were capable of, when you started exchanging
> phone numbers with guys (remember in your PO's
> office) to maybe 'talk' about something...'doing
> something'...I seriously didn't and still don't
> know what you're capable of, if you'd actually
> have someone physically hurt. That's where I
> started to get seriously concerned. Can you
> understand why I might question everything about
> you at that point, when there was this 'hush hush,
> wink-wink, nudge-nudge, don't ask if you don't
> want the answer' stuff building about taking some
> kind of reprisals...? Why I would start to
> question everything?
>
> The personal business only compounded that. It was
> not the motivating factor and not what made me
> make the mistake of having a knee-jerk reaction
> about your testimony; I felt you had manipulated
> me and my parents a number of times...first was to
> get into the WaPo picture (now you say that was a
> ploy to just get my picture out there)...I never
> dragged your parents into anything, I wouldn't
> play divide and conquer like that. That was
> manipulative of you. I'm not sure you realize some
> of the stuff you do. My hope is where this has
> ended up is due to misunderstanding....a series of
> them. There's no bribery. Anything I offered was
> out of genuine concern for you. There was an 'I
> hate you, I love you' crazy thing going on and we
> both know it, and we both know equally nasty
> things were said on both our parts; you brought
> that out in me most times, if memory
> serves...again, I admit to mistakes like that. "He
> called the cops on me". You leave out the part
> about me doing that because you were talking
> suicide and I was seriously concerned and didn't
> know what to do. I haven't heard you admit to a
> mistake. Not ever, not once. Talk of 'we need to
> get a bigger bed'...come on. It's either you
> telling a concocted story out of anger or having
> been deceitful from the start; either way, it's
> bad on you, not me. I guess I'll never know 100%
> if the whole entire thing was a lie. I would never
> in a million years trust you again or want
> anything to do with you, but I do want to be
> peaceful instead of nasty...I'd rather not go to
> god damn war.
>
> I think you think revenge is an okay thing. I
> don't think revenge is okay. Someone's wronged
> you, doesn't give you a license to strike out.
> Vengeance, vindictiveness....I don't buy into that
> shit. But I see it in your track record with this
> website. I think it's disgraceful that you would
> chuck all your integrity and beliefs (that eesh is
> the monster he is, and we both know it) out the
> window, and join the enemy because you're upset
> with me. That is dishonorable. You lack honor, for
> doing that. Frankly, you have no role in this
> lawsuit other than to sit on a witness stand for a
> few minutes and answer a few straightforward
> questions. You can sit on the bench, and it'll be
> quite a long time before you even need to think
> about this. Since the malicious prosecution suit
> is no longer happening, you can just forget any of
> this ever happened, until sometime late next year
> when the trial finally happens. And we very well
> might just release you anyway. The fact is, you
> are not a factor in this suit any longer. We
> probably won't use you.
>
> You don't have a role. THis is all unecessary. You
> cannot possibly believe I vandalized anything of
> yours. You PM'd me repeatedly on this name and
> many times I did not even respond. No offense, but
> I had absolutely no interest in you or having
> anything to do with you....apparently we
> corresponded around the time I was in the hospital
> in 2012 getting ECT...but after that, I pretty
> much brushed you off. No offense, but don't
> flatter yourself. Please read this message
> carefully and realize how out of control
> everything is. From the point of mid-2012 on, I
> never trusted you and more important, you were not
> a thought in my head....ever. I cared not for you
> and ignored you many times. I would never get in
> my car and drive anywhere for anyone on this
> website. I think that's nuts.
>
> I'm trying to get it under control without having
> to resort to another legal pile of shit to deal
> with. Like you advised me in your PMs to this name
> many times: just forget, leave it alone, it only
> brings more pain and grief and stress and
> interferes with life. Walk away, please. And stop
> campaigning to attach my name and names of family
> members to unfavorable google results. Why do
> this? You really have that much venom in you? I
> personally do not. Life is one big pile of shit.
> Why spend your time on the computer, making it
> even shittier? The anger you carry around in your
> gut is cancerous...my sincere advice is to let it
> go or else it will eat you alive. I'm no longer
> angry. I once was. I was very angry...I was where
> you are now. I'm not angry anymore. I"m just set
> on holding a person accountable for being the
> monster he is. I"m cool and collected about it.
> You were constantly consumed by anger when you
> were with me...a dark cloud was almost always over
> your head. I honestly advise you to try to let
> that all go. It makes life worse, not better.
> Anger is self-inflicted and malignant.
>
> I can drop everything right now as long as you
> stop. I would like to forget I ever met you. And
> that's not meant in a nasty way. It's just the
> truth. It was a mistake I ever started talking to
> you after my trial and a huge mistake I ever met
> you in person. It's one of the worst things that's
> ever happened to me. Let's forget it. ...just walk
> away. THis is the last time I'll be sending you
> any kind of communication, it's a last-ditch
> effort to convince you that what you're doing is
> just perpetuating pain and venom and bile and
> grief and it's all just cancerous and not
> necessary. It puts more suffering out there into
> the world.
>
> What happened was not personal. Not mainly. It was
> a mounting problem I had with you over a number of
> things I observed. The personal stuff just
> compounded it. I was growing disgusted and
> resentful of you and your obsessive, ruminating,
> dark disposition for some time. I had problems
> with you way before you realized it. And they were
> not interpersonal problems. They were problems I
> had with your obsessive nature, thinking it's okay
> to do to others as long as they've done to you
> kind of thinking....a lot of things like that. I
> think you're a vindictive person, that's what I
> observed. That was not a problem of you not
> wanting to have sex and me 'freaking
> out'...fortunate for you I sent that text (pretty
> much sarcastically, because I knew it was over and
> just wanted to read your answer for
> entertainment's sake)...now you use it as a cudgel
> to drive home a point that is unfounded. You're
> telling a twisted, one-sided story. NO. I had
> problems way deeper than just you saying you were
> only my witness and nothing more (that was also
> manipulation, as you had said that previously, and
> then you came back and said you had been suicidal
> and that 'love is scary' and that I called you and
> it made you feel all better....and dragged my
> parents into the crossfire during the big
> fight....then we meet again and you're all
> affectionate and shit..even take me with you to
> your shrink??? that's driving a man up a wall, you
> realize that? You came back and stayed with me of
> your own free will and if it was only because your
> washer broke, as you say, then you're pretty much
> a shitty person...no offense).
>
> This was all a huge fucking mistake. And you have
> NO IDEA the contempt I had brewing over your
> treating that pro order like a big joke, and
> telling me things that would implicate me if they
> ever were to be brought up in any kind of police
> or court matter.....that was all shitty stuff to
> do. NO, what happened was not in reaction to you
> leaving, it was in reaction to ALL OF THAT, and
> you leaving and me knowing you were leaving for
> good without the decency to be a woman about it
> and explain yourself was just something that
> helped me see who you really are. Frankly, I still
> believe you are unstable on some level and you
> probably need either therapy or correct medication
> management, or both. I really don't think you're
> getting the treatment that could benefit you.
> Please consider looking into that. I actually
> still feel bad for you because I do believe you
> could benefit from the correct treatment.
>
> The rest was exactly as I just explained: I
> observed bad behavior that you seemed to
> rationalize. I lost respect for you over all that
> and it threw everything else into question too. So
> I made a mistake as our fight heated up and said
> something that was sincere, yet not
> thought-out...I thought it out later and
> apologized sincerely, but then you wanted to
> dictate to me that I was to write some sort of
> groveling mea-culpa and post it to the forum for
> you....I felt you were being manipulative by
> trying to dictate terms to me, like 'do this or
> else', so I just thought 'to hell with this...I
> apologized, it was sincere, I won't be dictated
> to'....and thus, your warpath began.
>
> Anyway, let's just stop it. I will not contact you
> again. If you keep this up, you might possibly be
> forcing my hand in something I honestly don't want
> to get into. Probably not...but if it gets to a
> point I can't ignore it any longer, I might have
> to consider what options I have. I doubt I'll be
> suing you. I think it would be stupid and
> pointless. But I just want to appeal to reason
> here. The truth of it is: I mad you angry. Very
> angry. I feel I was somewhat justified but admit
> to making a bad mistake for which I have
> apologized, and apologize is all I can do for you.
> But you're angry, and that's the only reason
> you're smearing my entire family online right now.
> I want to tell you that anger will eat you alive.
> I have been there. Anger is depression turned
> outward. And I believe your reaction is
> disproportionate to what I did to anger you. All
> my clothes are gone, by the way. Not just 3
> shirts. That you apparently took all my clothes
> (clothes that obviously wouldn't even fit you), is
> another indication you were acting on some sort of
> malice before we even started fighting late that
> night. That you not only didn't have the decency
> to be a woman and say 'this is goodbye' at the
> very least, but that you took stuff pretty much
> just to be mean...apparently, as far as I can
> tell. So....just saying. Let go the anger. It's
> unhealthy and I know firsthand.
>
> And you must've told Megan I dropped her name to
> the cop, because I sure didn't bring her up at
> all. And I sure didn't post anything about her
> like you claimed, and I've never once trolled
> her...I honestly like and respect Megan...she's
> never shown herself to be dishonest and frankly,
> she's probably the sanest, most on the ball person
> in this entire debacle revolving around eesh. I
> don't want you to do anything to undermine her
> case against eesh...she has suffered for real and
> you try to paint me as the manipulator....and that
> could be used by eesh in court, just like he tried
> to use that bullshit 'conspiracy' angle last time.
> she trusts you, that's her choice...but realize
> you casting doubt with her over me as posting
> stuff about her is opening the door for eesh to
> claim it was not him but me who had some part in
> the whole thing. I think you feeding her
> misinformation and especially saying I maybe
> posted her nudes at any point is giving eesh an
> arsenal of ammunition in court. Anyway...okay....
>
> I want to forget it. Do as you wish, but you know
> the kind of stuff you've been posting. Just please
> stop. Drop it. If your life is so full and
> wonderful, good for you, and I'm glad...focus on
> that, stop your smear campaign. At a certain point
> I can't look the other way. Last attempt to say
> 'let's call this all off and forget it'. I still
> think there's good in you...but I'm not seeing it
> currently. Look into yourself, take stock of
> things. You invest just as much emotion into an
> enemy as you do a friend, you know. The difference
> between a friend and an enemy is razor thin,
> emotionally. If I'm so insignificant and mean so
> little, you would not invest so much energy in
> attacking me. You'd just forget I exist. I'm ready
> and willing to do that with you. I consider you
> neither friend nor enemy right now. I only read
> what you write. I'm pretty much neutral with you
> at this point, emotionally. Ready to say nice
> knowing ya and goodbye and good luck. I'm a
> pacifist like that. It took me some time to get
> there.
>
> I don't think you're going to make it to actually
> being called up to testify. So, your role in this
> really is done. I'd appreciate if you could
> disavow yourself of having any part here, because
> frankly...you don't..anymore. You're still a
> witness now, but I really don't know if you'll be
> there at trial the way things have gone.
>
>
> It's your choice. Goodbye, hope your temper
> settles at some point and you actually do move on
> from this site; I hope to never have to think of
> this site again myself...at some point.
>
> (I'll enjoy reading this on the forum later...my
> faint hope is you'll take it seriously though. If
> you reply, I won't read it. Just consider this a
> statement, not a conversation. Whatever you decide
> to make of this, I'm still going to wish you the
> best, and that entails that you move on from this
> site and from investing so much energy and hate in
> me or anyone else.)