­



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:45AM by chuckhoffmann.

lol
Attachments:

Come on, don't be a cop caller.

I'm trying to like ya Chucko, man up.

idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam



Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.

Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM

Dude, come on. Don't be such a Debbie Downer.

I had actually wrote out a very concise, logical, and reasonable post to show you that you're over-reacting and reading too much into MrM's two posts that reference you, but I then realized that there's no changing your mind because you're completely paranoid. So I erased it.

Again, if you don't have a thick enough skin, this site is not for you. Personally, I love the snarkiness, sarcasm, and twisted sense of humor that permeates this this place.

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

I never get tired of this.



I may get it as a ringtone to play for these sticks in the mud I'm always running into.

idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam



Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.

Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM

This really should have been a pm, but really it shouldnt be a pm either...

I like Chuck. But this shit doesnt help.
I have left this site for months at a time due to asshats and I always come back.

If you really feared for your life, you should have called the cops.

I have been here for two years and have posted 800 times. You have been here for 4 months and posted the same. You must not hate it here that much...

Dont stress about it so much.

I don't like or dislike Chuck. I just find him to be kind of a sad figure.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WTL wrote:
"I don't like or dislike Chuck. I just find him to be kind of a sad figure."

I echo the same sentiments, I also believe he exhibits manifest signs of depression and should seek counseling - but that's only something he can do.

-
Attachments:

followed by this commercial
Attachments:

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Since I am an insomniac, and have a fascination
> with the law, I spend my time not writing unfunny,
> ill-informed and illogical posts on Fairfax
> Underground doing things like reading the Code of
> Virginia. While doing so, I came across this
> little tidbit (parts highlight for emphasis):
>
> § 18.2-60.3. Stalking; penalty.
> A. Any person, except a law-enforcement officer,
> as defined in § 9.1-101, and acting in the
> performance of his official duties, and a
> registered private investigator, as defined in §
> 9.1-138, who is regulated in accordance with §
> 9.1-139 and acting in the course of his legitimate
> business, who on more than one occasion engages in
> conduct directed at another person with the intent
> to place, or when he knows or reasonably should
> know that the conduct places that other person in
> reasonable fear of death, criminal sexual assault,
> or bodily injury to that other person or to that
> other person's family or household member is
> guilty of a Class 1 misdemeanor.
>
> What does this have to do with anything, you ask?
>
> MrMephisto, in an oblique attempt to have some
> unstable person involved in the murder of Wyatt
> Campbell target me, impersonated me in the
> "Stabbing In Rose Hill" thread in the Fairfax
> General forum. (I have asked Cary to remove the
> post.)
>
> Perhaps he thought he was being funny or clever,
> or perhaps he was hoping someone would come to my
> house and commit vandalism or some violent act
> against me or my family.
>
> This warning is directed squarely at MrMephisto.
> You crossed the line. Do not do this again.
>
> If you do, I will use every legal means I can
> summon to have you arrested and pursue a civil
> case against you.
Attachments:

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> § 18.2-60.3. Stalking; penalty.
> A. Any person, except a law-enforcement officer,
> as defined in § 9.1-101, and acting in the
> performance of his official duties, and a
> registered private investigator, as defined in §
> 9.1-138, who is regulated in accordance with §
> 9.1-139 and acting in the course of his legitimate
> business, who on more than one occasion engages in
> conduct directed at another person with the intent
> to place, or when he knows or reasonably should
> know that the conduct places that other person in
> reasonable fear of death, criminal sexual assault,
> or bodily injury to that other person or to that
> other person's family or household member is
> guilty of a Class 1 misdemeanor.
>
> What does this have to do with anything, you ask?
>
> MrMephisto, in an oblique attempt to have some
> unstable person involved in the murder of Wyatt
> Campbell target me, impersonated me in the
> "Stabbing In Rose Hill" thread in the Fairfax
> General forum. (I have asked Cary to remove the
> post.)
>
> Perhaps he thought he was being funny or clever,
> or perhaps he was hoping someone would come to my
> house and commit vandalism or some violent act
> against me or my family.

Well, I suppose that first you'd have to establish that my cunning ruse of writing, "I'm Chuck Hoffmann and I live in Springfield" under my own username was done with the intent to cause you criminal sexual assault.

I think you'd have a hard time proving that, for several reasons:

1. You, Chuck Hoffmann, of your own volition, posted your full name and address to an internet community that has all the tools in hand to provide complete anonymity for its users, and where there is a reasonable expectation of anonymity.

2. In that thread, it's very clear that I am talking to you on multiple occasions, and thus cannot actually be Chuck Hoffmann.

3. I did not provide geographic information more specific than "Springfield," nor did I mention other details such as when you'd be home, your travel patterns, your "family's" information, or any other information that would enable someone reading the post in question to be able to track you down in real life. If I had "intent," I would have logged out, posted using a name similar to yours, and would have included all of the specific information you yourself provided, including your picture.

> This warning is directed squarely at MrMephisto.
> You crossed the line. Do not do this again.

Here's the really, really funny part. Remember this thread? You said, and I quote:

Another goal, which is to cause your mask of anonymity to be stripped from you and have you publicly exposed as the detestable, unpleasant individual you are; I'm working on that.

And while Cary may be a staunch defender of free speech, he also knows your real name, and do you seriously believe he's willing to spend several thousand dollars of his own money to keep that secret? Are you?

Based on the information you just provided about the legality of stalking, it appears you are more guilty of it than I am. I have absolutely no desire to even so much as look at you in real life, while you have clearly stated that you are actively working on exposing my personal information to the public so I can face the retaliation you think I deserve for the opinions I have on the topics people post.

> If you do, I will use every legal means I can
> summon to have you arrested and pursue a civil
> case against you.

Well, I'm certainly not going to be arrested. For a warrant to be issued, you'd first need to prove to a court that I am enough of a threat to merit a subpoena to the owner of this site to provide my name and address so the cops can show up and arrest me for being mean to someone on the internets.

Your best bet would be a civil suit, which would necessitate paying a lawyer to file the complaint to attain the aforementioned subpoena so you can drag me into court and prove beyond a reasonable doubt that my hurtful, hurtful words caused you significant problems that can't be solved by just, y'know, clicking the little "x" in the top right corner of the screen.

I would say that I'd welcome the opportunity to counter-sue you for lost wages and court costs, but really, the only person you're going to cause problems for is the administrator, and I don't want Cary to shut this site down because assholes like you keep trying to sue someone.

Do yourself a favor, Chuck. Close your browser, and go try to improve the quality of your life. Look for a job, start jogging, volunteer to feed the homeless, whatever. This shit is clearly not healthy for you.

Sincerely,

Chuck Hoffmann in Springfield

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

I hereby move that the Greasemonkey script be appended to include the term "chuckhoffmann"

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> chuckhoffmann Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > § 18.2-60.3. Stalking; penalty.
> > A. Any person, except a law-enforcement
> officer,
> > as defined in § 9.1-101, and acting in the
> > performance of his official duties, and a
> > registered private investigator, as defined in
> §
> > 9.1-138, who is regulated in accordance with §
> > 9.1-139 and acting in the course of his
> legitimate
> > business, who on more than one occasion engages
> in
> > conduct directed at another person with the
> intent
> > to place, or when he knows or reasonably should
> > know that the conduct places that other person
> in
> > reasonable fear of death, criminal sexual
> assault,
> > or bodily injury to that other person or to
> that
> > other person's family or household member is
> > guilty of a Class 1 misdemeanor.
> >
> > What does this have to do with anything, you
> ask?
> >
> > MrMephisto, in an oblique attempt to have some
> > unstable person involved in the murder of Wyatt
> > Campbell target me, impersonated me in the
> > "Stabbing In Rose Hill" thread in the Fairfax
> > General forum. (I have asked Cary to remove the
> > post.)
> >
> > Perhaps he thought he was being funny or
> clever,
> > or perhaps he was hoping someone would come to
> my
> > house and commit vandalism or some violent act
> > against me or my family.
>
> Well, I suppose that first you'd have to establish
> that my cunning ruse of writing, "I'm Chuck
> Hoffmann and I live in Springfield" under my own
> username was done with the intent to cause you
> criminal sexual assault.
>
> I think you'd have a hard time proving that, for
> several reasons:
>
> 1. You, Chuck Hoffmann, of your own volition,
> posted your full name and address to an internet
> community that has all the tools in hand to
> provide complete anonymity for its users, and
> where there is a reasonable expectation of
> anonymity.
>
> 2. In that thread, it's very clear that I am
> talking to you on multiple occasions, and thus
> cannot actually be Chuck Hoffmann.
>
> 3. I did not provide geographic information more
> specific than "Springfield," nor did I mention
> other details such as when you'd be home, your
> travel patterns, your "family's" information, or
> any other information that would enable someone
> reading the post in question to be able to track
> you down in real life. If I had "intent," I would
> have logged out, posted using a name similar to
> yours, and would have included all of the specific
> information you yourself provided, including your
> picture.
>
> > This warning is directed squarely at
> MrMephisto.
> > You crossed the line. Do not do this again.
>
> Here's the really, really funny part. Remember
> this thread? You said, and I quote:
>
> Another goal, which is to cause your mask of
> anonymity to be stripped from you and have you
> publicly exposed as the detestable, unpleasant
> individual you are; I'm working on that.
>
> And while Cary may be a staunch defender of free
> speech, he also knows your real name, and do you
> seriously believe he's willing to spend several
> thousand dollars of his own money to keep that
> secret? Are you?
>
> Based on the information you just provided about
> the legality of stalking, it appears you are more
> guilty of it than I am. I have absolutely no
> desire to even so much as look at you in real
> life, while you have clearly stated that you are
> actively working on exposing my personal
> information to the public so I can face the
> retaliation you think I deserve for the opinions I
> have on the topics people post.
>
> > If you do, I will use every legal means I can
> > summon to have you arrested and pursue a civil
> > case against you.
>
> Well, I'm certainly not going to be arrested. For
> a warrant to be issued, you'd first need to prove
> to a court that I am enough of a threat to merit a
> subpoena to the owner of this site to provide my
> name and address so the cops can show up and
> arrest me for being mean to someone on the
> internets.
>
> Your best bet would be a civil suit, which would
> necessitate paying a lawyer to file the complaint
> to attain the aforementioned subpoena so you can
> drag me into court and prove beyond a reasonable
> doubt that my hurtful, hurtful words caused you
> significant problems that can't be solved by just,
> y'know, clicking the little "x" in the top right
> corner of the screen.
>
> I would say that I'd welcome the opportunity to
> counter-sue you for lost wages and court costs,
> but really, the only person you're going to cause
> problems for is the administrator, and I don't
> want Cary to shut this site down because assholes
> like you keep trying to sue someone.
>
> Do yourself a favor, Chuck. Close your browser,
> and go try to improve the quality of your life.
> Look for a job, start jogging, volunteer to feed
> the homeless, whatever. This shit is clearly not
> healthy for you.
>
> Sincerely,
>
> Chuck Hoffmann in Springfield


ooo meph, i love it when you get all gamey like that.

yeefuckinghaw

themuse Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ooo meph, i love it when you get all gamey like
> that.

I'm such a cad.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> themuse Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > ooo meph, i love it when you get all gamey like
> > that.
>
> I'm such a cad.


yes, you are.
and i love it.
mreeewr.

yeefuckinghaw

wow, touche' Mr Mephisto are you educated in the law? if not maybe you have a new career path ahead of you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/02/2010 12:58PM by pas'ion.

pas'ion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> wow, touche' Mr Mephisto are you educated in the
> law?

More than Charles, apparently.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

I'm edumacated in Masturbation with a 30+ year career behind me.

WeeWillyWanker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm edumacated in Masturbation with a 30+ year
> career behind me.


Like Rodney Dangerfielf said or something like this Even though I've never had sex I know I'll be good at it, because I've been practicing by myself for years!

­



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:46AM by chuckhoffmann.

remember in Tommy Boy when he backs the car up at the gas pump and fucks the door up? that was funny

Well, I'll see you in court, Charles.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Hoffman, you are a douche bag of epic proportions. I hope a safe falls from the sky and lands on you.

496 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hoffman, you are a douche bag of epic proportions.
> I hope a safe falls from the sky and lands on you.

Maybe your Death Threat trial will be held the same day as my Stalker (?) trial. We'll be court buddies!

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Yahweh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> Dont stress about it so much.

+1, if you aren't enjoying the place, step away for a while.

It's astounding how someone could get so much abuse and still stick around for more. There are kids in schools right now whose lives are being ruined by bullies and they aren't even asking for it.

I think Chuckie has a death wish...yeah, that's it.

I think he can't stand himself anymore but doesn't have the balls to
commit suicide.

Is this chuck guy a persona the same way troll@aol is? Or is chuck the new spunky/vince(1), a real person, just unstable?

Emeritus Q. Beaker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is this chuck guy a persona the same way troll@aol
> is? Or is chuck the new spunky/vince(1), a real
> person, just unstable?
Attachments:

Emeritus Q. Beaker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is this chuck guy a persona the same way troll@aol
> is? Or is chuck the new spunky/vince(1), a real
> person, just unstable?


He's a for-real fat fuck

­



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:45AM by chuckhoffmann.

Chuck,
I'm confussed. How is it that you were outed when you use your real name?

I'm gonna sit this one out, guys. This chuckhoffmann story line just doesn't have the zest of an Eli/Conie, Elle Diabla/She Devil, I am Spunky type of story. I enjoy the troll wars on here, but this one is just lame.

Hoffman, you fucktard. Stop trying to sound like a lawyer.

You've cited to criminal section of VA Code yet you state "If you do, I will use every legal means I can summon to have you arrested and pursue a civil case against you."

Which is it, are you going to whine to a Commonwealth's Atty and attempt to persuade the CA to pursue criminal charges or are you going to file a civil action? The ambiguity with which you communicate will not suffice if you with to proceed pro se with any sort of success.

Just to put things in perspective, you use your full name as your handle on this website. You have repeatedly posted on this website and made comments which would allude to you residing in Springfield (google if you want to find them). This in and of itself creates an inference that you are not in any fear of someone knowing who you and where you are located. Therefore, it is not reasonable to believe you fear people knowing where you reside.

Further, no retard would believe that you posted the things said in that thread. No, let me restate that, no reasonable person would believe it. And, because no reasonable person would believe you said those things, no reasonable person in your position would fear repercussions, let alone physical assault over what was stated.

Secondly, the standard pattern jury instruction for both civil and criminal stalking state: "If you find [beyond a reasonable doubt/by a preponderance of the evidence] that [defendant], on more than one occasion, engaged in conduct directed at [plaintiff] with the intent to place [plaintiff] in reasonable fear of [death] [criminal sexual assault] [bodily injury], then you shall find your verdict for [plaintiff]."

This pattern jury instruction requires a finding that the defendant acted with the INTENT to put you in reasonable fear.... You'll have to prove that the defendant not only intended to piss you off or toy with you but that he actually intended to put you in fear of physical harm. Good luck with that part.

Further, if you were to proceed civilly, you'd first have to serve a complaint on the defendant, then you'd have to provide notice of electronic evidence preservation against the defendant and FFU. At some point you'd have to overcome a motion to dismiss.

Then you'd have to go through discovery and subpoena the IP records from FFU, assuming FFU even maintains IP records. Next you'd have to serve a subpoena on the defendant's ISP to identify the name of account holder.

It doesn't stop there. The defendant and any party served could challenge the subpoena, and you'd better expect that they would do so. ISPs hate to give out customer information, as do most webmasters because it's bad for business. Once you have the name of the account holder, you'll probably need to prove that it was the defendant that made those actual remarks and not someone else in the household or someone accessing that internet connection. That'll be discovered by obtaining a forensic image of the harddrive of that computer. Then you'll need to get a forensic expert to parse through the cookies and other data on that computer. You'll also have to respond to any discovery requests that the defendant may make against you.

Then you'll actually head to court where you'll get hit with a motion for summary judgment. Oh, and BTW, to overcome these motions and objections, you can't just whine to the court "but but but he was mean to me on FFU!" You'll actually need to come up with an argument based in law and fact.

Lastly, you'll actually have to prevail in court. In the mean time, the media will pick up the story and publish your name, address, and probably your picture next to a story about what a pathetic POS you are. You'll be the punchline of the day on Fark.

In the mean time, while all this BS is going on, we'll all think you're an even bigger douchebag than you already are.

So, why don't you save some face, get rid of that lame signature, and just play nice with the other boys and girls?

Hoffman is a douche Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hoffman, you fucktard. Stop trying to sound like
> a lawyer.
>
> You've cited to criminal section of VA Code yet
> you state "If you do, I will use every legal means
> I can summon to have you arrested and pursue a
> civil case against you."
>
> Which is it, are you going to whine to a
> Commonwealth's Atty and attempt to persuade the CA
> to pursue criminal charges or are you going to
> file a civil action? The ambiguity with which you
> communicate will not suffice if you with to
> proceed pro se with any sort of success.
>
> Just to put things in perspective, you use your
> full name as your handle on this website. You
> have repeatedly posted on this website and made
> comments which would allude to you residing in
> Springfield (google if you want to find them).
> This in and of itself creates an inference that
> you are not in any fear of someone knowing who you
> and where you are located. Therefore, it is not
> reasonable to believe you fear people knowing
> where you reside.
>
> Further, no retard would believe that you posted
> the things said in that thread. No, let me
> restate that, no reasonable person would believe
> it. And, because no reasonable person would
> believe you said those things, no reasonable
> person in your position would fear repercussions,
> let alone physical assault over what was stated.
>
>
> Secondly, the standard pattern jury instruction
> for both civil and criminal stalking state: "If
> you find that , on more than one occasion,
> engaged in conduct directed at with the intent to
> place in reasonable fear of , then you shall
> find your verdict for ."
>
> This pattern jury instruction requires a finding
> that the defendant acted with the INTENT to put
> you in reasonable fear.... You'll have to prove
> that the defendant not only intended to piss you
> off or toy with you but that he actually intended
> to put you in fear of physical harm. Good luck
> with that part.
>
> Further, if you were to proceed civilly, you'd
> first have to serve a complaint on the defendant,
> then you'd have to provide notice of electronic
> evidence preservation against the defendant and
> FFU. At some point you'd have to overcome a
> motion to dismiss.
>
> Then you'd have to go through discovery and
> subpoena the IP records from FFU, assuming FFU
> even maintains IP records. Next you'd have to
> serve a subpoena on the defendant's ISP to
> identify the name of account holder.
>
> It doesn't stop there. The defendant and any
> party served could challenge the subpoena, and
> you'd better expect that they would do so. ISPs
> hate to give out customer information, as do most
> webmasters because it's bad for business. Once
> you have the name of the account holder, you'll
> probably need to prove that it was the defendant
> that made those actual remarks and not someone
> else in the household or someone accessing that
> internet connection. That'll be discovered by
> obtaining a forensic image of the harddrive of
> that computer. Then you'll need to get a forensic
> expert to parse through the cookies and other data
> on that computer. You'll also have to respond to
> any discovery requests that the defendant may make
> against you.
>
> Then you'll actually head to court where you'll
> get hit with a motion for summary judgment. Oh,
> and BTW, to overcome these motions and objections,
> you can't just whine to the court "but but but he
> was mean to me on FFU!" You'll actually need to
> come up with an argument based in law and fact.
>
> Lastly, you'll actually have to prevail in court.
> In the mean time, the media will pick up the story
> and publish your name, address, and probably your
> picture next to a story about what a pathetic POS
> you are. You'll be the punchline of the day on
> Fark.
>
> In the mean time, while all this BS is going on,
> we'll all think you're an even bigger douchebag
> than you already are.
>
> So, why don't you save some face, get rid of that
> lame signature, and just play nice with the other
> boys and girls?


wow, anonposter, you should register next time.
writing like that warrants attention, not to say you didn't get mine.

yeefuckinghaw

.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/22/2011 08:16PM by chuckhoffmann.

chuck... You're absolutely right... There is nothing but a bunch of crazy folks on this site... and any reasonable person would know that.

I have a quick question, though...

Why didn't you address Hiad's point? If having your real identity online makes you feel so threatened, then why would you use your real name for your "handle"?

Why would you tell us so much personal information about yourself?

I think the answer can be found somewhere in here...

"It causes me regret some times that I will never be admitted to the bar, because I could spend the rest of my life researching and writing litigation; it's that interesting to me."

It sounds like you aren't really in fear for your life... sounds like you just want to play lawyer...

I admire your courage... I wouldn't be so cool about it if I were in your shoes... I wonder if you even realize how deranged these people are...

Anyway, chuck, I'd be extra careful if I were you... maybe lay off this site for a little bit...

...Y'know... just in case some unreasonable person gets the urge to splatter your, or your family's, brains all over the carpet after raping you/them to tears...

Who knows what these sickos are capable of?

Better safe than sorry, chuck...

You'll be in my prayers, Mr. hoffmann... I want nothing more than the safety of you and your family...

Edits: Heavens! I just can't seem to form a proper sentence today... What atrocious grammar...

Signatures are for fags



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 11/03/2010 05:39AM by Harry Tuttle.

.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/22/2011 08:17PM by chuckhoffmann.

Wanna see my Chuck Hoffman impersonation?

Hi, I'm Chuck Hoffman. Does anyone have a dick I can suck?

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Exactly. It's a lot of work, which I would really
> prefer not to do, because I am naturally lazy.

I suppose this is a better way to spend your time than looking for a job. Or losing weight. Or improving any of the billion things you say is wrong with your life.

After you go through everything necessary and we're finally standing in front of a judge in a year, I hope you come up with a good explanation for why you've never been contacted, visited, looked at, emailed, PMed, attacked, or had any of your property vandalized as a result of my "deliberate impersonation."

I'm the bigger man here, Charles, because if you WERE being harassed in any way because of my Darkman-esque ability to look, act, and sound just like you, I would tell the idiots that I am not really Chuck Hoffman, and they are idiots. Believe it or not, I'm actually a nice guy.

But, since you thought you could intimidate me with your legal prowess, I'm calling you on your bullshit.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Chuck doesn't have enough money for a lawyer. Bottom line. He's an unemployed loser that the world would be better off without.

that's the eesh we love!

you bring a rainbow of happiness to this site!

Wanda Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> that's the eesh we love!
>
> you bring a rainbow of happiness to this site!






I advocate suicide for the lulz.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I advocate suicide for the lulz.

Aw, sweet! You can be Court Buddies with 496 and me.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Jesus, I wish you two would just shut up and sleep together already. Everyone here knows you're totally gay for each other!

UN4pJ Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Jesus, I wish you two would just shut up and sleep
> together already. Everyone here knows you're
> totally gay for each other!

Ah, things are back to normal.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

hoffman should make himself an hero.

(google it if you must)

dbag why don't you go sit yourself down with a book on civil procedure and one on the rules of evidence before you go running your mouth like an obama voter missing her welfare check.

I'm sure he's just going to come back and say we played right into his hands.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Here's the simple way to counter Chuck...

Preface each post with "In my opinion."

Libel concerns covered.

Mr. M - you have a strong case in your favor.

Hustler magazine got sued because they were parodying something or another. Hustler won the Supreme Court decision based on the fact that it was a public figure and they cannot recover damages based on parodies.

Now your lawyer could argue on a couple points in your favor - first - Charles Hoffman has made his name public on his own accord - he could therefore be considered a public figure. None of the rest of us know each others names. This site doesn't ask for or broker such knowledge in anyway. Mr. Hoffman willingly released it and therefore is a public figure. Second, this site constantly parodies one another, public officials, everything - it is the very nature of the site. You take a public figure (i.e. Mr. Hoffman) and parody him = supreme court decision in your favor Mr. M!

You know, I used to regularly visit an anonymous forum for a sport where there was this one guy who used his own name, posted constantly, and threatened litigation when some called him on his high fallutin bullshit. It was a truly complex psychological make up: this guy posted a lot in order to try to make himself look smart (he wasn't) in order to gain the respect that he craved. However, I believe the narcissism this guy exhibited was really catalyzed by deeply held feelings of insecurity and inferiority, He seemed to view the fact that he "signed his posts" with his real name as some sort of heroic action, and he challenged others to do the same. The difference was, for most of us, the forum was recreation- we just went there to bust this guy's balls and occasionally get in a good conversation about the sport. This guy saw the forum as a place to express his "manliness" and to try to foist his "knowledge" upon people. One time, when I was really busting his balls , I insinuated that anyone who got as offended as he did or so badly wanted to be seen as an expert on an anonymous forum as he did was really sick and was hiding something. A week or two later, this man was arrested for videotaping naked children outside a nudist colony. The arrest caused the FBI to make a visit to his house where , it was discovered, he had rigged a camera through his garage wall and into one of his bathrooms in order to videotape his players (young girls) naked. He is currently in prison.

I don't mean to insinuate at all that Chuck is a pedophile, nor can I logically assert that he is sick. However, the similarities between Chuck and this other dude make me wonder if Chuck may be mentally ill, depressed, dealing with some serious psychological issue, or some combination of the three.

Chuck, Mephisto called your bluff man. Your attempt to scare him totally backfired, and I imagine that is hard for you to accept. You know damn well you aren't going to sue him, and so does he. Let it go. Take a break from this for a while bro- you are too into it and there has to be a better way to invest your time. As for you guys who say "kill yourself" ,you seriously have to be cognizant that some times you jus can't (or shouldn't) say shit like that to someone.

Britdrnva~ Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mr. M - you have a strong case in your favor.
>
> Hustler magazine got sued because they were
> parodying something or another. Hustler won the
> Supreme Court decision based on the fact that it
> was a public figure and they cannot recover
> damages based on parodies.
>
> Now your lawyer could argue on a couple points in
> your favor - first - Charles Hoffman has made his
> name public on his own accord - he could therefore
> be considered a public figure. None of the rest
> of us know each others names. This site doesn't
> ask for or broker such knowledge in anyway. Mr.
> Hoffman willingly released it and therefore is a
> public figure. Second, this site constantly
> parodies one another, public officials, everything
> - it is the very nature of the site. You take a
> public figure (i.e. Mr. Hoffman) and parody him =
> supreme court decision in your favor Mr. M!

I'd be prepared to take it to the Supreme Court, but honestly, the first hearing would go something like this.

MrMephisto: "Your Honor, after reading the facts of the case as presented to the court, I move to have this case dismissed due to it being completely fucking retarded."

Judge: "I concur. Case dismissed."

Charles Hoffman: "But, but... I'm scared!"

Judge: "Shut the fuck up, you fucking pussy."

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

If Chuck Hoffmann didn't use his real name as an internet screen name, or advertise the fact he lives with his mother in Springfield, he wouldn't feel as threatened.

I'd be prepared to take it to the Supreme Court, but honestly, the first hearing would go something like this.

MrMephisto: "Your Honor, after reading the facts of the case as presented to the court, I move to have this case dismissed due to it being completely fucking retarded."

Judge: "I concur. Case dismissed."

Charles Hoffman: "But, but... I'm scared!"

Judge: "Shut the fuck up, you fucking pussy."


It's more like this:

Judge: "Mr Hoffman, can you identify the target of the lawsuit?"

Fuck Hoffman: "No."

Judge: "Mr. Hoffman, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. We can only hope that a safe falls from the sky and lands on you. Case dismissed."

Here's what I think happened:

Chuck Hoffmann (if that's even his real name) joined FU to promote his blog, http://www.howtobebad.com. Since he's unemployed (by his own admission), he saw Fairfax Underground as an opportunity to attract some readers, who would hopefully make a donation to him. A constant rotation of pithy phrases in his signature linked back to his blog, so he was generally regarded as "that guy who promotes his blog on FU." Nobody really gave a shit.

After a billion FU Wiki entries and several hundred posts, he wasn't getting the attention he thought he deserved. So, he decided to pick a fight with me to attract readers from the people defending the actions of some dumbass who got drunk and laid down in the middle of the road. He's since deleted all his comments, but the relevant bits are still quoted.

This legal vendetta Chuck has with me started in this thread. He sent me a PM stating that something I said was a death threat, and he would be seeking legal action against me. He's since backed away from that, saying he "misinterpreted" what I said.

I suspect his intent now is to paint himself as some sort of champion willing to stand up to "cyber bullies" as a prelude to his next blogging endeavor, howtobeacolossalpussy.com, since his discovery that he knows absolutely nothing about being bad.

Good luck, Charles. You'll need it.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/03/2010 12:55PM by MrMephisto.

Mephisto
I think you are spot on. So many guys with a modicum of writing talent and a half a brain, both of which Chuck has (probably more), walk around thinking the world is somehow oblvious to their talent and just needs enlightenment. They start these crazy blogs, which nobody reads, and then fish for readers. Chuck, you seem like a decently bright guy, get your shit together, hit the gym, get a job, and you can still come here to break balls. Seriously dude, you get one crack at being alive, don't waste it being a corpulent frustrated writer.

Wow, this is rather sad. Chuck, you got butthurt on the intrawebs and now you are threatening legal action?

Your identity is not a secret when it's your username.

I'd just drop this if I was in your shoes.

­




Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:38AM by chuckhoffmann.

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This doesn't mean I'm not going to post here any
> more, just that I will no longer post using my
> real name as my user name. I will post
> anonymously, just like everyone else. (I have done
> this in the past, and, amusingly, no one has ever
> correctly identified one of my anonymous posts.)

+1

No offense, but you should have done this from the beginning. I'm curious, did you lurk here prior to posting?

> I will also not pursue any legal action against
> any other FU poster. It really is too much work.

It would be entirely too much work and what would the benefit be?

Mr. Hoffman - you're man enough to own up to mistakes - rarely do people self examine and publicly acknowledge that - for that I applaud you. I still believe you should remain off this board for your own mental health - but that's your call. Don't take this board seriously - none of it. It should be viewed as amusement - at least that's the way I see it and I think the vast majority of the users.

The e-altercations I've been in with other users on here were about 800 times more vicious than anything poor Fuck Offmann has had to deal with, and I never once thought of this legal action bullshit.

Fuck, I had one guy tell me how he watched me from across the bar one night. Fucking psycho.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Reading the messages in this forum has caused me
> to do some serious self-examination, and I
> realized that some of the less-rabid, more
> well-reasoned posts are absolutely correct.
>
> There is something wrong with me, and I need to
> work on fixing it.
>
> This doesn't mean I'm not going to post here any
> more, just that I will no longer post using my
> real name as my user name. I will post
> anonymously, just like everyone else. (I have done
> this in the past, and, amusingly, no one has ever
> correctly identified one of my anonymous posts.)
>
> I will also not pursue any legal action against
> any other FU poster. It really is too much work.
>
> To MrMephisto and Eesh and 496 and the rest of
> you, I'm duly chastened.
>
> You win.


Shut the fuck up you cock sucking pussy. Fuck you and the horse you rode in on.
Do you really for one minute think that anybody was concerned about your empty, faggoty threats? And now you're in "aw, I feel sorry for my sorry faggot ass" mode. I'd laugh my ass off if you did yourself in. I'm laughing now.
Bwahahahaahahahahahahahahahaha. Douche bag.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The e-altercations I've been in with other users
> on here were about 800 times more vicious than
> anything poor Fuck Offmann has had to deal with,
> and I never once thought of this legal action
> bullshit.
>
> Fuck, I had one guy tell me how he watched me from
> across the bar one night. Fucking psycho.


e-altercations are so passe'.
why don't we spice up this thread a lil' bit, hmmm?
e-panties and e-dreams are what i'm talking about.
or want to.

yeefuckinghaw

Just a quick bump to remind everyone of the faggotry that Hoffman engages in.

Buuuuump Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Just a quick bump to remind everyone of the
> faggotry that Hoffman engages in.

Bumps are for chumps.

Real men draw cartoons mocking chuckhoffman.
Attachments:

HA! It's almost as creative as Miz's caricatures.




A Real Man Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Buuuuump Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Just a quick bump to remind everyone of the
> > faggotry that Hoffman engages in.
>
> Bumps are for chumps.
>
> Real men draw cartoons mocking chuckhoffman.

1up good buddy....

King Tutt Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> HA! It's almost as creative as Miz's caricatures.

Signatures are for fags

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm sure he's just going to come back and say we
> played right into his hands.

He might do that, especially if:

1) He found it amusing, and/or
2) It really, really pissed you, eesh, and 496 off.

A Real Man Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Buuuuump Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Just a quick bump to remind everyone of the
> > faggotry that Hoffman engages in.
>
> Bumps are for chumps.
>
> Real men draw cartoons mocking chuckhoffman.


Loving it.

­



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:40AM by chuckhoffmann.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The e-altercations I've been in with other users
> on here were about 800 times more vicious than
> anything poor Fuck Offmann has had to deal with,
> and I never once thought of this legal action
> bullshit.
>
> Fuck, I had one guy tell me how he watched me from
> across the bar one night. Fucking psycho.


You are like a shit magnet sometimes - you know that right? And we are not even talking in a janitorial sense...

lol

If you can’t model the past, where you know the answer pretty well, how can you model the future? - William Happer Cyrus Fogg Brackett Professor of Physics Princeton University



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 11/06/2010 12:11PM by Registered Voter.

Registered Voter Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You are like a shit magnet sometimes - you know
> that right? And we are not even talking in a
> janitorial senses...
>
> lol



--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Why wood chuckhoffman threatening law suites then make fun of himself? Is it a joke?

Whats Going On Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Why wood chuckhoffman threatening law suites then
> make fun of himself? Is it a joke?


Yes, Chuck Hoffman is a joke.

i couldn't resist. . .

I remember this on the Beeb when I was at university. It's from "The Old Grey Whistle Test".

­



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/16/2013 11:40AM by chuckhoffmann.

.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/22/2011 08:24PM by chuckhoffmann.

So you went from a blogger to a message board troll.

You stay classy, Charles.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> 496 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Yes, Chuck Hoffman is a joke.
>
> So, what's the punchline?


Chuckie..everyone's tired of your pathetic posts here.
I think, though, that we would welcome posts from the real Chuckie.
We're all insecure beings...

Conie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> We're all insecure beings...




Speak for yourself.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So you went from a blogger to a message board
> troll.
>
> You stay classy, Charles.






He acts like a kid that just learned about HTML in class and is eager to show off to everyone what a computer wiz he is.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > So you went from a blogger to a message board
> > troll.
> >
> > You stay classy, Charles.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> He acts like a kid that just learned about HTML in
> class and is eager to show off to everyone what a
> computer wiz he is

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > So you went from a blogger to a message board
> > troll.
> >
> > You stay classy, Charles.
>
>
>
>
>
>
> He acts like a kid that just learned about HTML in
> class and is eager to show off to everyone what a
> computer wiz he is.


Both you and mephisto post (act) like you were bullied in school.

Conie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Both you and mephisto post (act) like you were
> bullied in school.





And you act like a Fatal Attraction headcase that stalks and harasses men until they acknowledge your presence.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Conie Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > Both you and mephisto post (act) like you were
> > bullied in school.
>
>
>
>
>
> And you act like a Fatal Attraction headcase that
> stalks and harasses men until they acknowledge
> your presence.


We need to get a room

Conie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:

> And you act like a Fatal Attraction headcase
> that
> > stalks and harasses men until they acknowledge
> > your presence.
>
>
> We need to get a room

need help there, lil' buddy?
Attachments:

.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/22/2011 08:24PM by chuckhoffmann.

chuckhoffmann Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Conie Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Both you and mephisto post (act) like you were
> > bullied in school.
>
> Actually, all three of us do, and it dawns on me
> that I didn't like being bullied in school, and I
> shouldn't be acting like a bully on here (when I'm
> not acting like a total douche or a fucktard, that
> is).




You're not acting like a bully here. You're more like the obnoxious retard that tried desperately to be the class clown yet failed on a daily basis.

.




Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 10/22/2011 08:23PM by chuckhoffmann.

Chuck started it.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> chuckhoffmann Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Conie Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Both you and mephisto post (act) like you
> were
> > > bullied in school.
> >
> > Actually, all three of us do, and it dawns on
> me
> > that I didn't like being bullied in school, and
> I
> > shouldn't be acting like a bully on here (when
> I'm
> > not acting like a total douche or a fucktard,
> that
> > is).
>
>
>
>
> You're not acting like a bully here. You're more
> like the obnoxious retard that tried desperately
> to be the class clown yet failed on a daily basis.





I loved being one of the bullies at school. It was the main reason I went




---------------------------------------------------
W.W.S.D. what would Scooby Doo

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Chuck started it.
Attachments:

Wow! Where did you get that picture? I've never, ever seen it before.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wow! Where did you get that picture? I've never,
> ever seen it before.


exactly

go play out in the street with your matchbox cars chuck.