Fairfax County General :
Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Poooo Wrote:
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> I have a problem. A dog keeps crapping on my yard
> and other yards in the Vienna general area.
>
> How can I deal with this?
Move to another country, because the stress you must have could be killing you - I suggest any Asian country. You could then eat dogs, instead of having to put up with their criminal activity.
If you live in the Town of Vienna, the Vienna police will stake out your yard to catch the offending dog and owner. This is why you pay so much in Vienna property taxes.
get a security camera - chances are the dog(s) are being walked early in the morning and late at night and the owner is just lazy. Cameras are reasonable and once you get the data you could narrow down the time of infraction and confront them (also working to id them) after that call the cops and have citations issued.
If that doesnt work or if you dont like the direct approach follow them home and smear dog crap all over their doors/cars/cats etc... they will get the point.
Poooo Wrote:
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> I have a problem. A dog keeps crapping on my yard
> and other yards in the Vienna general area.
>
> How can I deal with this?
What do you do about the squirrels and birds that crap in your yard?
Go visit France or Africa. When you see human poop in the streets dog poop won't seem so bad.
Poooo Wrote:
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> I have a problem. A dog keeps crapping on my yard
> and other yards in the Vienna general area.
>
> How can I deal with this?
Poooo Wrote:
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> I have a problem. A dog keeps crapping on my yard
> and other yards in the Vienna general area.
>
> How can I deal with this?
Curly Wrote:
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> Poooo Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I have a problem. A dog keeps crapping on my
> yard
> > and other yards in the Vienna general area.
> >
> > How can I deal with this?
>
>
> Follow him home and crap in his yard.
What legality and paperwork would I need for this procedure?
Simpoly squat in his yard and let fly your faeces. Wear a kilt or man-skirt with no underpants so as not to indecently expose yourself in the process. Defecating is not an crime, unlike public urination.
Better Idea Wrote:
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> Anti-freeze in seveal bowls at the property libe
> of your yard.
Very funny, here is an even better idea: I give you an anti-freeze enema, then rip your head off and shit down your neck.
Anyone who kills/abuses a dog like that deserves to die. I don't like dog poop in my yard and I don't even own a dog. But if I ever saw anyone intentionally kill a dog I would do my utmost to eradicate their vile existence from the planet, regardless of the consequences. I'd call the police, shoot you to keep you from fleeing or fighting back, then hack you to bits with a meat cleaver in as painful manner as possible.
another idea Wrote:
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>
> Very funny, here is an even better idea: I give
> you an anti-freeze enema, then rip your head off
> and shit down your neck.
>
> Anyone who kills/abuses a dog like that deserves
> to die. I don't like dog poop in my yard and I
> don't even own a dog. But if I ever saw anyone
> intentionally kill a dog I would do my utmost to
> eradicate their vile existence from the planet,
> regardless of the consequences. I'd call the
> police, shoot you to keep you from fleeing or
> fighting back, then hack you to bits with a meat
> cleaver in as painful manner as possible.
another idea Wrote:
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> Very funny, here is an even better idea: I give
> you an anti-freeze enema, then rip your head off
> and shit down your neck.
Let's meet for lunch and discuss. Tell your boss
you won't be back in afterwards as you'll be at the
ER having a boot removed from your ass.
I'll smack you so damn hard your grandkids' ears
will ring.
The anti-freeze works. My neighbor had a pit that used
(key word: "used") to get out occasionally. Problem
solved.
If people took proper care of their dogs, there wouldn't
be the need to have discussions like this.
Better Idea Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> another idea Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Very funny, here is an even better idea: I give
> > you an anti-freeze enema, then rip your head
> off
> > and shit down your neck.
>
> Let's meet for lunch and discuss. Tell your boss
> you won't be back in afterwards as you'll be at
> the
> ER having a boot removed from your ass.
>
> I'll smack you so damn hard your grandkids' ears
> will ring.
>
> The anti-freeze works. My neighbor had a pit that
> used
> (key word: "used") to get out occasionally.
> Problem
> solved.
>
> If people took proper care of their dogs, there
> wouldn't
> be the need to have discussions like this.
Haha you don't seem to understand. I literally do not care what happens to me. Tell me your name and address and let me see you intentionally harm an animal. I can guarantee you will not live to do it again.