¿?¿?¿?¿?
Attachments:

srsly Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ¿?¿?¿?¿?


aww what a cutie. i almost kissed my computer screen when i saw that fuzzy little face and paws.

what a sweet, adorable pussy.

i have been following your show since day 1. honestly you're the only reason i come to this site.

will you ever be on radio or tv?

thanks for all you do
Ms. Creant

Dr. Terri prey tell your not on vacation again or out bird watching. No alias to fill in


Do you think people with certain physical and/or facial characteristics is a good indication of that indviduals personality
Huh?

You know a middle age woman with thin lips and narrowing eyes is usually indicative of a nasty temper, just an example

An obese man who wears a tight golf shirt is indicative of what?
No not me per se

Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Terri prey tell your not on vacation again or
> out bird watching. No alias to fill in

No Lamont. I take very few vacations. I'm reluctant to leave my "patients" alone for too long. I love my "patients", Lamont.

> Do you think people with certain physical and/or
> facial characteristics is a good indication of
> that indviduals personality
> Huh?

That's an interesting question, Lamont.

Certain facial characteristics, or features, such as ears that flop over, or a missing eye pupil, or a nose with an extra nostril indicate really nothing about the individual's innate personality.

> You know a middle age woman with thin lips and
> narrowing eyes is usually indicative of a nasty
> temper, just an example

Well, it might indicate that the woman is angry at that particular moment, but not necessarily that she possesses a nasty temper.

For example, I have a "patient" named eesh, who often causes my face to contort into expressions that make me look like I'm about to commit a heinous, grisly, bloody murder with the axe I keep under my desk.

And yet, Lamont, I do not possess a nasty temper, generally speaking, that is.

> An obese man who wears a tight golf shirt is
> indicative of what?

Maybe he sees himself as a thinner man than he actually is. Or, maybe he's the ultimate optimist and is sure he'll someday fit into the shirt. Or, Lamont, maybe he's happy with his weight and his shirt.

> No not me per se

I know that, Lamont. I can tell you are a handsome man with a strong masculine body. (any pics?)

Just kidding about the pics... unless, you insist. Just kidding, again.

This picture is about 5 years old so I've lost a little hair since then. Is this what you were looking for Dr. Teri?
Attachments:

Dear Dr. Teri,

I'm a moderately attractive girl who's been sober for two months now. I recently started dating a 38 year old guy (we'll call him "P") who has a long history of drug and alcohol abuse, jail time, DUIs, and a child he doesn't take care of. He tells me he has a great job and lots of money, but he never talks about his job. When I ask him where he works, he gets very angry.

He says he wants to get sober but I think he's still sneaking out to bars and getting drunk. I suspect this because he often shows up at my door at 3:00 AM smelling strongly of breath mints and unable to maintain an erection. If I tell him I'm not in the mood because I have to work the day shift at Hooters tomorrow, he gets very angry and yells at me for not "backing my shit up." I'm worrid that he's goig to hit me one of these days. He's a very violent and short-tempered guy, but he tells me he loves me and I'm "hot as fuck."

Should I keep him or ditch him, Dr. Teri?

- Worried in Mclean

Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This picture is about 5 years old so I've lost a
> little hair since then. Is this what you were
> looking for Dr. Teri?

You look very nice, Lamont.

Somehow, I expected you to look, I don't know.... different.

Worried in Mclean Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dear Dr. Teri,
>
> I'm a moderately attractive girl who's been sober
> for two months now.

Bravo!

I recently started dating a 38
> year old guy (we'll call him "P") who has a long
> history of drug and alcohol abuse, jail time,
> DUIs, and a child he doesn't take care of. He
> tells me he has a great job and lots of money, but
> he never talks about his job. When I ask him where
> he works, he gets very angry.

That's called a RED FLAG. In this case, multiple Red Flags. Like rip tides in the ocean, stay away from men who carry Red Flags. This is especially important for you right now, Worried.

> He says he wants to get sober but I think he's
> still sneaking out to bars and getting drunk. I
> suspect this because he often shows up at my door
> at 3:00 AM smelling strongly of breath mints and
> unable to maintain an erection. If I tell him I'm
> not in the mood because I have to work the day
> shift at Hooters tomorrow, he gets very angry and
> yells at me for not "backing my shit up." I'm
> worrid that he's goig to hit me one of these days.
> He's a very violent and short-tempered guy, but he
> tells me he loves me and I'm "hot as fuck."

Worried, you need to understand that a man will say he loves you or that you're "hot as fuck", just to get laid. Twenty four hours later he's saying the same things to another girl. Why, only recently, even I believed .... well, enough about me.

> Should I keep him or ditch him, Dr. Teri?

Worried, I'm going to let you answer that question.

> - Worried in Mclean

Free yourself, Worried, and live your life.

P.S.
There's something about your story... something oddly familiar....

Ms. Creant Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> aww what a cutie. i almost kissed my computer
> screen when i saw that fuzzy little face and
> paws.
>
> what a sweet, adorable pussy.
>
> i have been following your show since day 1.
> honestly you're the only reason i come to this
> site.
>
> will you ever be on radio or tv?
>
> thanks for all you do
> Ms. Creant


Ms. Creant, thank you for your kind words. You made me blush.

RE: Future tv or radio contracts.... my agent is currently in talks with the networks and Clear Channel. There have been a couple of interesting offers.

But, I want all my fans to understand that no matter how big a star I become, no matter how many florescent light bulbs it takes to light up my palatial estate, I will always remain loyal to you, my dear dear friends from FFXU. Of course, I might have to disavow my connection here, but that's just the whole PR game. I will always answer your questions, under a different name, of course, but the important thing is, I will never forsake you. Never!

Dr. Teri, Where you thinking more along these lines?
Attachments:

Lamont Sanford esq. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri, Where you thinking more along these
> lines?

Actually, yes. Not that it would matter in the slightest bit, whatsoever. No sirre Bob.

Believe it or not, Lamont, some of my best friends are black. Why, just yesterday, I waved to my black neighbor and said, "Beautiful day, isn't it?" And, he said, "Sure is."

To keep the banter going, I picked up a few of his acorns from my lawn, hurled them straight at his head and said, "I think these belong to you, Leroy." (not his real name, I'm just jokin' with him) He threw back a couple of rocks and said, "I think these belong up your fat ass," which was funny, since, of course, I don't have a fat ass. So, I laughed and said, "Fat ass? That ass on your wife is so fat she has to walk down halls, sideways. I've heard it even shows up on satellites as an unidentified humongous object." Leroy really enjoyed that line so he grabbed his crowbar and started heading my way, but just at that moment, I was needed inside, so I didn't hear the funny things he said next.

By the way, Lamont, last week, a few comments, including one of yours, failed to reach my in-box. Regarding the scoundrel who used your good name to speak unspeakable things involving Applejack... don't worry. I know you would never speak to me in such a disgraceful manner. You have always conducted yourself as a gentleman here on the ASK DR. TERI- column. And, Lamont, I've been told women are flocking to this column to follow your latest struggles as a man at a turning point in his life. (keep up the good work)

What's with the esq. after your name?

Is it possible for a 27 yr old man to be interested in a very attractive (as I have been told by some other guy) 45 yr old woman? or is the age difference too great? maybe that's a turn on? what say you?

questioning Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is it possible for a 27 yr old man to be
> interested in a very attractive (as I have been
> told by some other guy) 45 yr old woman? or is
> the age difference too great?
Attachments:

Dr. Teri, Here's picture of me from late 1980's. My ex-wife talked me into getting my hair like that
Attachments:

You know Dr. Teri I am waiting for a picture of you. Do you have a picture of yourself with your ad in the Yellow Pages?

I have another story about a different 24 yr. old bartendress if you'd like to hear it?
I must admit I've tired of trying to shed a lil' wisdom of the aged with the 24 yr. old waitress. you might have been right about the slut stuff. still hangs out with the slime balls from her last job and she ain't going to change even if she comes from a family of college grads. i do think she is a pretty good actress.

D.D. if by any chance that place of employment isn't as a dental technician how about Hooters? You got that blouse in a creme orange color?

Hi Dr. Teri,

Do you have any tips on how to deal with this heat?

It's nearly 80 degrees and my ass crack is all wet and sticky with sweat.

Last summer I had problems with chaffing and irritated skin, back there, not to mention she smell.

How can I avoid this problem in the impending summer months?

thanks,
swamp ass

questioning Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Is it possible for a 27 yr old man to be
> interested in a very attractive (as I have been
> told by some other guy) 45 yr old woman? or is
> the age difference too great? maybe that's a turn
> on? what say you?


Is it possible? Of course. How old was Benjamin when he found himself in the arms of Mrs. Robinson?

Is an older woman a turn on for a man? Probably.

But, so is a headless manikin wearing Playtex cross you heart bras at JCPenny.

not at all Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

picture of female human remains.


Sadly, I receive "private messages" from a young man here on FFXU, who entertains such a fetish.

His seemingly harmless attraction to women in their 40's and 50's evolved into an insatiable appetite for women in their 70's and 80's. Soon, only women past 90 could excite him. He became obsessed with Willard Scott, anxiously waiting to see pictures of women turning 100.

Recently he's been attending wakes and funerals, pretending to be a relative of the deceased and has even been arrested for impersonating the coroner at the county morgue.

Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You know Dr. Teri I am waiting for a picture of
> you. Do you have a picture of yourself with your
> ad in the Yellow Pages?

Thanks for sharing your curly hairdo picture. Your wife liked this look?
And, no Lamont, my yellow pages ad does not include a picture. I thought that might appear unprofessional.

> I have another story about a different 24 yr. old
> bartendress if you'd like to hear it?

That's what I'm here for, Lamont. To listen.
But, Lamont, I think it's time for you to move beyond the 24 yr. old barfly. Put down the twinkies, Lamont, and taste something with a little more flavor.

> I must admit I've tired of trying to shed a lil'
> wisdom of the aged with the 24 yr. old waitress.
> you might have been right about the slut stuff.
> still hangs out with the slime balls from her last
> job and she ain't going to change even if she
> comes from a family of college grads. i do think
> she is a pretty good actress.

That's the little voice inside you, Lamont. It's speaking to you.

> D.D. if by any chance that place of employment
> isn't as a dental technician how about Hooters?
> You got that blouse in a creme orange color?

I see we still have a lot of work to do.

Hi Teri,

My girlfriend has finally agreed to try anal sex. Any tips to make this a special first time and not turn her off for future sessions? I have read and heard that analingus before hand might help her relax. Is this true?

Stop talking to yourself Alias.

First Time Advice Seeker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi Teri,

Good evening and welcome to the ASK DR. TERI- show. How can I help you?

> My girlfriend has finally agreed to try anal sex.

Ahh.... capitulation. This girl sounds like marriage material.

> Any tips to make this a special first time and not
> turn her off for future sessions?

Tell her how amazing she is and that her body drives you crazy. Throw the "love" word around a bit.

> I have read and
> heard that analingus before hand might help her
> relax. Is this true?

I haven't the foggiest.

But, if she is less than thrilled with the experience, you could always go gay.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Stop talking to yourself Alias.


Hello, eesh. This is Dr. Teri.

How are we feeling this evening?


eesh?



eesh?

woke up this morning and my head hurt , my feet stank and , and was having some doubts about eternity and Jesus

as i age the things I once was familiar with seem to get further and further away and the eternal future seems very very near

think I'll go to a bar and have me some mess of chicken wings and get the 20 year old cute waitress to give me a big old hug


D.D.?

Lamont, I hate to have to tell you this....

D.D. is dead.

Her boobs exploded this morning causing her body to shoot straight up in the air. Tragically, she was shot down by a hunter who mistook her for a duck.

I'm sorry, Lamont.

I know how much they meant to you.

I don't think I can handle my heart being broken again Dr. Teri. This time it just won't mend. For in D.D.'s eyes(?) I had seen forever.

Well I'm headed to the 7/11 for a bottle of Boone's Farm this cold rainy April night. i'll remember April and D.D. and I'll smile. Hey Dr. Teri I just got the D.D. double meaning. Look out commode I'll be giving you a big old hug tonight.

I'm sensing a bit of anger on your part Dr. Terri. Especially over the D.D. affair. I will miss her but I'm ready to move on except for that wistful little smirk i'll get every once in awhile

Okay here's a real picture of me in front of my real favorite eating establishment. I'm the wispy mustached one in the jacket. The older fellow is my late Uncle Emil. And the only 24 yr. girls interested in me see a sap with cash. Hey it's a wicked life but what the hell. And I'm just the same as anyone else when it comes to scratching for my needs
Attachments:

.



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 03/08/2012 07:05PM by Alias.

Forget to log out Alias? lollllllll

eesh is a regular reader of Dr.Teri's advice column.

how gay is that?

Good evening, FFXU, and welcome to ASK DR. TERI-.

I'd like to begin by thanking Dr. Alias for her holiday good wishes. How kind of her. And, please, don't fret over the spelling of my name. What's an "r" or two amongst friends?

Before I tackle Lamont's legitimate concerns, I need to address comments made by "whaaat".

Whaaat has questioned the sexual orientation of a regular reader of this column, a Mr. eesh. To this, I can only ask that when you enter the Dr. Teri- zone, you leave questions of this nature up to me. Thank you.

And, to Mr. eesh... there is no need to giggle or make nonsensical comments to Dr. Alias. If you need my help, I'm here to listen. Don't be shy.

Dr. Teri,



I have a dark ring around the middle of my penis. You can't see it when my dick is soft, but when I have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see it. Should I be concerned?

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri,
>
>
>
> I have a dark ring around the middle of my penis.
> You can't see it when my dick is soft, but when I
> have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see it.
> Should I be concerned?


None of your fucking business

Lamont Sanford Ph.DD Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I don't think I can handle my heart being broken
> again Dr. Teri.

I understand, Lamont.

Recently, my heart was viciously ripped out of my chest cavity, stomped on and then thrown back in.... with no anesthesia and no stitches... well, enough about me....

> This time it just won't mend.

It will, Lamont. Of course, you'll have a huge god awful looking scar that will take years to fade.

> For
> in D.D.'s eyes(?) I had seen forever.

That's not what you saw, Lamont. All you saw were a couple of bounces on a trampoline. After that, she would have either bored you or smothered you... to death.

> Well I'm headed to the 7/11 for a bottle of
> Boone's Farm this cold rainy April night.

I hope you didn't do that, Lamont.

> i'll
> remember April and D.D. and I'll smile.

Yes, eventually.

> Hey Dr.
> Teri I just got the D.D. double meaning.

I knew you would, Lamont. It was important that I let you discover this on your own.

> Look out
> commode I'll be giving you a big old hug tonight.

Stay away from the letter D when it comes in pairs, Lamont.

Dr. Teri you've had your own thread for quite a while now,,,when will you register?

It would give you more credibility,and maybe end the perception that you are Alias,,,

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri,
>
>
>
> I have a dark ring around the middle of my penis.
> You can't see it when my dick is soft, but when I
> have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see it.
> Should I be concerned?


Sounds like you have ring worm.

Bring a pot of water to a full boil and soak the affected area.

Let me know how things.... just the one thing, actually... looks in the morning.

Dr. Teri~,

Should I shit, get off the pot, or continue sitting on the enjoyable seat warmers?

Here's the catch...

I could shit, if I wanted to... Actually, I feel like I'm going to explode if I don't...

It's not my toilet, though... If I shit, I'm afraid I won't be allowed to sit on the comfy toilet ever again...

I could probably sit for a while, and enjoy the whole thing... but eventually I'm going to either have to shit or get up and shit somewhere else...

Like I said, I'd like return toilet privileges... but what good is a toilet if I can't shit in it?

I'm so confused...

Signatures are for fags

Harry Tuttle Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri~,
>
> Should I shit, get off the pot, or continue
> sitting on the enjoyable seat warmers?
>
> Here's the catch...
>
> I could shit, if I wanted to... Actually, I feel
> like I'm going to explode if I don't...
>
> It's not my toilet, though... If I shit, I'm
> afraid I won't be allowed to sit on the comfy
> toilet ever again...
>
> I could probably sit for a while, and enjoy the
> whole thing... but eventually I'm going to either
> have to shit or get up and shit somewhere else...
>
> Like I said, I'd like return toilet privileges...
> but what good is a toilet if I can't shit in it?
>
> I'm so confused...


Harry, whose toilet is this?

And why wouldn't the owner allow you to enjoy the facilities when the need arises?

Asking the tough questions, Teri... That's why you get paid in "big bucks"...

It's a communal toilet, I think...

Or... maybe it's a friend's toilet...

I'm gettin' my analogies all mixed up... I used to be so good at those...

The reason I wouldn't be able to use the toilet whenever I want would be that my stench makes the owner unvcomfortable...

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Harry, whose toilet is this?
>
> And why wouldn't the owner allow you to enjoy the
> facilities when the need arises?

Signatures are for fags

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Dr. Teri,
> >
> >
> >
> > I have a dark ring around the middle of my
> penis.
> > You can't see it when my dick is soft, but when
> I
> > have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see it.
> > Should I be concerned?
>
>
> Sounds like you have ring worm.
>
> Bring a pot of water to a full boil and soak the
> affected area.
>
> Let me know how things.... just the one thing,
> actually... looks in the morning.



Teri,


I have a better idea. How about you suck the dark off my dick. I'm sure you could suck a piston out of a tailpipe, so it shouldn't be any problem.

eesh is in rare form tonight...

Relish this occasion...

Signatures are for fags

Mr. Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm sensing a bit of anger on your part Dr. Terri.

That's Dr. Teri- with one "r", Lamont.

> Especially over the D.D. affair. I will miss her
> but I'm ready to move on except for that wistful
> little smirk i'll get every once in awhile

Take a picture of the smirk and tuck it away in your memory box.

> Okay here's a real picture of me in front of my
> real favorite eating establishment. I'm the wispy
> mustached one in the jacket. The older fellow is
> my late Uncle Emil. And the only 24 yr. girls
> interested in me see a sap with cash. Hey it's a
> wicked life but what the hell. And I'm just the
> same as anyone else when it comes to scratching
> for my needs

Sap with cash was the first thing that came to mind when looking at your picture.

Harry Tuttle Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Asking the tough questions, Teri... That's why you
> get paid in "big bucks"...

Yes. I'm in the highest tax bracket.

BTW, it's DOCTOR Teri-. I've worked very hard for this title.


> It's a communal toilet, I think...

> Or... maybe it's a friend's toilet...

I see. Please continue.


> I'm gettin' my analogies all mixed up... I used to
> be so good at those...

That happens.... you might be flushing too often.


> The reason I wouldn't be able to use the toilet
> whenever I want would be that my stench makes the
> owner unvcomfortable...

There is a simple solution for this. Light a match.

Is there anything else I can help you with, Harry?


> Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Harry, whose toilet is this?
> >
> > And why wouldn't the owner allow you to enjoy
> the
> > facilities when the need arises?

Hatemotor Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri you've had your own thread for quite a
> while now,,,when will you register?
>
> It would give you more credibility,and maybe end
> the perception that you are Alias,,,


Hello Hatemotor and welcome to Ask Dr. Teri-.

I hesitate to register my name given my desire to maintain an equal and balanced relationship with my "patients". Some people associate an elitist mentality with the color blue. My goal here is to be one with the people, not to place myself above the common man.

Regarding my colleague, Dr. Alias.... she and I share a common approach to problem solving so some confusion is expected. I hope this doesn't become too problematic.

Thank you for your concern, Hatemotor.

DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my eye, its askew from my pupil. do i have aids?

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > eesh Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Dr. Teri,
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > I have a dark ring around the middle of my
> > penis.
> > > You can't see it when my dick is soft, but
> when
> > I
> > > have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see
> it.
> > > Should I be concerned?
> >
> >
> > Sounds like you have ring worm.
> >
> > Bring a pot of water to a full boil and soak
> the
> > affected area.
> >
> > Let me know how things.... just the one thing,
> > actually... looks in the morning.
>
>
>
> Teri,
>
>
> I have a better idea. How about you suck the dark
> off my dick. I'm sure you could suck a piston out
> of a tailpipe, so it shouldn't be any problem.


eesh, maybe you should stick your piston up your tailpipe...

Good day.

bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my eye, its
> askew from my pupil. do i have aids?

Does you eye look like this?
Attachments:

Hey Dr Teri. Swallow my load!

Dr. Teri,

I am the first to fight, I am way too loud, and I am the flash of light on a burial shroud. Is there something wrong?

XoXo,

BEB

Brown Eye Blind Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri,
>
> I am the first to fight, I am way too loud, and I
> am the flash of light on a burial shroud. Is there
> something wrong?
>
> XoXo,
>
> BEB


BEB,

Just step back from the ledge, my friend... do it for me.

Come on now... grab my hand.

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > eesh Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > Dr. Teri,
> > > >
> > > >
> > > >
> > > > I have a dark ring around the middle of my
> > > penis.
> > > > You can't see it when my dick is soft, but
> > when
> > > I
> > > > have a raging hard-on, you can clearly see
> > it.
> > > > Should I be concerned?
> > >
> > >
> > > Sounds like you have ring worm.
> > >
> > > Bring a pot of water to a full boil and soak
> > the
> > > affected area.
> > >
> > > Let me know how things.... just the one
> thing,
> > > actually... looks in the morning.
> >
> >
> >
> > Teri,
> >
> >
> > I have a better idea. How about you suck the
> dark
> > off my dick. I'm sure you could suck a piston
> out
> > of a tailpipe, so it shouldn't be any problem.
>
>
> eesh, maybe you should stick your piston up your
> tailpipe...
>
> Good day.


Dr Terri might be eesh's answer to the demise of Conie. Pecking order type of thing.

The new Conie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> Dr Terri might be eesh's answer to the demise of
> Conie. Pecking order type of thing.


That's Dr. Teri- with 1 (one) "r".

eesh can peck away all he wants. Eventually, he will exhaust himself and that's when he'll be the most receptive to my behavior modification therapy.

Right now he's testing me, hoping to shock me with constant references to his penis. First it was the dark rings on his penis. Then, he's making lewd and inappropriate comments involving his penis and oral sex. This is very normal for a person with his type of personality disturbance.

Sure, I could take him over my knee, pull down his pantaloons and smack that fat ass of his until it turns purple, but I doubt that would help. In fact, it could make matters worse, as I suspect he might actually enjoy a punishment of that sort.

It's better to simply let him talk about his penis until he gets bored. In my job, patience is the key.

Hi Dr. Teri-

It's me again. I am looking to increase the amount of fiber I consume each day. Can you name me some high fiber foods. Not a big bean fan, you should know this right up front. Will pork rinds work though if I sprinkle them with flax seed?

Love and admiration,

BEB

Golly Geez Dr. Teri,

"Sap with cash was the first thing that came to mind when looking at your picture."

D.D. never spoke too me so bluntly even if that's what she was thinking!


so there's was this 24 yr. old bartendress who quit this bar i go to. very attractive and a "one of the guys" kind of personality. she was very popular. unfortunately she also has a very very explosive temper and is a bit shady when it comes to the bill. bill padding? and uses the temper to hide the bill padding
anyways she quit the bar over a number of issues and got a better paying bartending job elsewhere. unfortunately, when she left a great deal of business also seemed to leave. lately, this young lady has been coming back to hang around the old job site on her off night. i sort of think thats bad form. she sure is purty but i think she could go to any bar and make new friends quite easily. I think she's sort of rubbing it in a bit to the old employees who've probably also seen a drop in income. being 24 i'm thinking the young lady may not have thought of this. what you think Dr.Teri?

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The new Conie Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> >
> > Dr Terri might be eesh's answer to the demise
> of
> > Conie. Pecking order type of thing.
>
>
> That's Dr. Teri- with 1 (one) "r".
>
> eesh can peck away all he wants. Eventually, he
> will exhaust himself and that's when he'll be the
> most receptive to my behavior modification
> therapy.
>
> Right now he's testing me, hoping to shock me with
> constant references to his penis. First it was
> the dark rings on his penis. Then, he's making
> lewd and inappropriate comments involving his
> penis and oral sex. This is very normal for a
> person with his type of personality disturbance.
>
>
> Sure, I could take him over my knee, pull down his
> pantaloons and smack that fat ass of his until it
> turns purple, but I doubt that would help. In
> fact, it could make matters worse, as I suspect he
> might actually enjoy a punishment of that sort.
>
> It's better to simply let him talk about his penis
> until he gets bored. In my job, patience is the
> key.
With all due respect to your profession, Good Fuckin Luck, I don't think eesh will ever get tired or bored with pecking away. Too many registered posters have abandoned this forum out of defeat due to eesh. I don't know, hope not, but you might be next on the list, whatever give him the good fight while your able. Maybe Lamont can be some assit. Keep up the fine work.

Brown Eye Blind Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi Dr. Teri-
>
> It's me again. I am looking to increase the amount
> of fiber I consume each day. Can you name me some
> high fiber foods. Not a big bean fan, you should
> know this right up front. Will pork rinds work
> though if I sprinkle them with flax seed?
>
> Love and admiration,
>
> BEB

Hello again BEB,

To be honest with you, I don't really know what pork rinds are. I don't think I've ever actually seen one; I'm almost sure I've never eaten one. Could you draw me a little picture of what a pork rind looks like?

Flax seed? Good source of fiber so if this tastes good on your pork rinds, then go sprinkle.

Here's my suggestion for adding fiber. Eat more apples. Let's remember... an apple a day keeps the doctor away. (just keep coming back to me)

Lowmont Sanford ah D.D. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Golly Geez Dr. Teri,
>
> "Sap with cash was the first thing that came to
> mind when looking at your picture."
>
> D.D. never spoke too me so bluntly even if that's
> what she was thinking!

Girls like D.D. are more subtle than I.

> so there's was this 24 yr. old bartendress who
> quit this bar i go to. very attractive and a "one
> of the guys" kind of personality

Do you mean she curses, spits and talks about farts?

> she was very
> popular. unfortunately she also has a very very
> explosive temper and is a bit shady when it comes
> to the bill. bill padding? and uses the temper to
> hide the bill padding

She sounds lovely.

> anyways she quit the bar over a number of issues
> and got a better paying bartending job elsewhere.
> unfortunately, when she left a great deal of
> business also seemed to leave.

She probably killed a few of the patrons.

> lately, this young
> lady has been coming back to hang around the old
> job site on her off night. i sort of think thats
> bad form. she sure is purty

She doesn't sound purty to me. She sounds more like an ugly dog.

> but i think she could
> go to any bar and make new friends quite easily. I
> think she's sort of rubbing it in a bit to the old
> employees who've probably also seen a drop in
> income. being 24 i'm thinking the young lady may
> not have thought of this. what you think Dr.Teri?

You really want to know what I think, Lamont? Here's what I think.

I wonder why you constantly find yourself attracted to bimbos. You might as well go to Toys R Us and buy yourself a Barbie doll with big boobs and stringy bleached hair. You can take off the doll's clothes, put her on your pillow and make believe she's D.D. or that potty mouth waitress.

There. That's what I think, Lamont.

Dr. Teri do you have a goat?

You have patience with the mighty eesh and the others with their bodily fluids humor but not for me?

Dr. Teri if no picture available how about the celebrity you most resemble


i do resemble michael ontkean a lot more than the sap with cash in the picture with emil sitka

I drove my old shrink nuts many years ago Dr. Teri

Lamont Sanford Wrote:

> I drove my old shrink nuts many years ago Dr.
> Teri



What in the hell is that supposed to mean?

"Lamont Sanford Wrote:

> I drove my old shrink nuts many years ago Dr.
> Teri "


greymoose posed the question
"What in the hell is that supposed to mean?"

Hmmmm that's a very interesting question. What do you think it means without resorting to scatological and/or bodily fluids humor?

Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri do you have a goat?

No, I do not have a goat. Do you, Lamont?

Picasso liked goats.

> You have patience with the mighty eesh and the
> others with their bodily fluids humor but not for
> me?

If I'm sounding impatient, then I do apologize, Lamont.

I don't normally discuss other "patients", but between you and me, eesh is a long term project; he could take years to fix. He is, to put it bluntly, deranged, whereas you, Lamont, are not.

Maybe I'm anxious to help you so I can say, hey, look what I did. I fixed Lamont.

> Dr. Teri if no picture available how about the
> celebrity you most resemble

I just look like myself, Lamont.

> i do resemble michael ontkean a lot more than the
> sap with cash in the picture with emil sitka

That's nice, Lamont.

> I drove my old shrink nuts many years ago Dr.
> Teri

I find that hard to believe, Lamont. It's not like your name is Bob.
Attachments:

Dr. Teri, When my son Lamont didn't answer the phone this morning I was concerned and hurried over to check if he was okay. Unfortunately, I found him comatose in his bedroom closet with a belt around his neck. I found this note pinned to his shirt which said the following.

"and if i have to go, will you remember me. or will you find someone else, while I'm away. there's nothing for me in this world full of strangers it's all someone else's idea. i don't belong here."

I'm not sure what the note meant Dr. Teri. The doctor said he's likely to remain in a coma for some time. He did come too briefly this morning and mumbled some woman's name.

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> bloody blisters Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my eye,
> its
> > askew from my pupil. do i have aids?
>
> Does you eye look like this?


nope, there is no dead matter in there. its just a black spot.

Fred G. Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri, When my son Lamont didn't answer the
> phone this morning I was concerned and hurried
> over to check if he was okay. Unfortunately, I
> found him comatose in his bedroom closet with a
> belt around his neck. I found this note pinned to
> his shirt which said the following.
>
> "and if i have to go, will you remember me. or
> will you find someone else, while I'm away.
> there's nothing for me in this world full of
> strangers it's all someone else's idea. i don't
> belong here."
>
> I'm not sure what the note meant Dr. Teri. The
> doctor said he's likely to remain in a coma for
> some time. He did come too briefly this morning
> and mumbled some woman's name.


Mr. Sanford,

Did Lamont say D.D.?

.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/08/2012 05:42PM by Alias.

Alias Wrote:
-
>
> I'll try, but it isn't easy. Lamont is hooked up
> to a feeding tube at the moment.




I hope Lamont is ok.


edit by Cary: Mooing sound effect disabled. Final warning, grow up.

"Dr. Teri axed,

Did Lamont say D.D.?"

No doc he mumbled something like cathy, name of his 1st wife who died in a mountain climbing accident back in 1987
he's lapsed back into a catatonic state

BTWS, doc we got a 3 Faces of Eve thing going on here with the various personnas

Hi Dr. Teri-

I was just wondering. Why is it that people who are terrible cooks always think they make great lasagna?

Thanks,
Bea Fuddled

bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > bloody blisters Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my eye,
> > its
> > > askew from my pupil. do i have aids?
> >
> > Does you eye look like this?
>
>
> nope, there is no dead matter in there. its just a
> black spot.


i've consulted with an iris specialist. that's all he deals with. he doesn't touch corneas or pupils or retinas or the white part. just the iris.

he asked if your black spot looked like this:
Attachments:

teri~ Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias Wrote:
> -
> >
> > I'll try, but it isn't easy. Lamont is hooked
> up
> > to a feeding tube at the moment.
>
>
>
>
> I hope Lamont is ok.

The nurse who bathes Lamont each morning has a pair of knockers that make D.D.'s look like a couple of mosquito bites.

This gives me hope that Lamont will survive.

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> bloody blisters Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > bloody blisters Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my
> eye,
> > > its
> > > > askew from my pupil. do i have aids?
> > >
> > > Does you eye look like this?
> >
> >
> > nope, there is no dead matter in there. its just
> a
> > black spot.
>
>
> i've consulted with an iris specialist. that's all
> he deals with. he doesn't touch corneas or pupils
> or retinas or the white part. just the iris.
>
> he asked if your black spot looked like this:


no, thanks for your help. its cancer.

bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > bloody blisters Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Dr. Teri- Wrote:
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > > -----
> > > > bloody blisters Wrote:
> > > >
> > >
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> >
> > >
> > > > -----
> > > > > DT, i have a dark spot in the iris of my
> > eye,
> > > > its
> > > > > askew from my pupil. do i have aids?
> > > >
> > > > Does you eye look like this?
> > >
> > >
> > > nope, there is no dead matter in there. its
> just
> > a
> > > black spot.
> >
> >
> > i've consulted with an iris specialist. that's
> all
> > he deals with. he doesn't touch corneas or
> pupils
> > or retinas or the white part. just the iris.
> >
> > he asked if your black spot looked like this:
>
>
> no, thanks for your help. its cancer.


i certainly hope that is not the case. i'd hate to think you'd end up looking like this guy.
Attachments:

Bea Fuddled Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi Dr. Teri-
>
> I was just wondering. Why is it that people who
> are terrible cooks always think they make great
> lasagna?
>
> Thanks,
> Bea Fuddled


I make great lasagna, Bea. So, go fuddle yourself.

Dr. Teri- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Bea Fuddled Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hi Dr. Teri-
> >
> > I was just wondering. Why is it that people who
> > are terrible cooks always think they make great
> > lasagna?
> >
> > Thanks,
> > Bea Fuddled
>
>
> I make great lasagna, Bea. So, go fuddle yourself.

!!!!ALERT ALERT ALERT!!!!




***Alias is Dr. Teri***Alias is Dr. Teri***Alias is Dr. Teri***

One of my "patients" gets confused easily.

Yesterday, he accused me of being Katie Couric.

And, that's just ridiculous.
Attachments:

Hey Dr. Teri, Lamont woke up today but the doc says he's needs to stay in ha ha hotel for a bit of observation. He did tell me to say he made up a lot of that stuff he posted ,half truths. hey its that internet. one day the docs might let him return to the internet after he gets over his middle age crazies


meanwhile doc this is Fred G. Sanford. my hair seems to be falling out like crazy lately. i mean my comb is full of hair.Personally i think this 24 year old waitress/witch put a hex on me. i don't want to go with the shaved head look. seems like a lot of tedious head shaving everyday and i'm too lazy. should i try rogaine or hair club for men?

Fred G. Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hey Dr. Teri, Lamont woke up today but the doc
> says he's needs to stay in ha ha hotel for a bit
> of observation. He did tell me to say he made up a
> lot of that stuff he posted ,half truths. hey its
> that internet. one day the docs might let him
> return to the internet after he gets over his
> middle age crazies

Hello, Fred.

I'm happy to hear that Lamont is awake. I miss him.

To celebrate this wonderful news, I'm sending him a telegram tomorrow. A singing telegram.

M&M not only sings but is an accomplished hula dancer. She is also listed in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the largest boobs in the world. 36 Triple M. (she goes by M&M, for short)









> meanwhile doc this is Fred G. Sanford. my hair
> seems to be falling out like crazy lately. i mean
> my comb is full of hair.Personally i think this 24
> year old waitress/witch put a hex on me. i don't
> want to go with the shaved head look. seems like a
> lot of tedious head shaving everyday and i'm too
> lazy. should i try rogaine or hair club for men?

I recommend complete removal of every hair on your body by means of electrolysis.

Doc Teri, Looks like M&M might have some back problems. I don't believe Lamont was as fixated on breasts as you seem to think. Nice eyes and a pleasant voice count even more.

Fred G. Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Doc Teri, Looks like M&M might have some back
> problems.

I think M&M has a lot of problems.

> I don't believe Lamont was as fixated on
> breasts as you seem to think.

I'm relieved to hear that, Fred.

> Nice eyes and a
> pleasant voice count even more.

Yes, I understand. It's really more the whole picture.

And, Fred, I'm not sure how much of attraction is physical and how much is mental. What I've found with myself, if I'm not attracted to the mind, the body loses its physical appeal rather quickly. But, if I'm in love with the actual person, he becomes the most handsome man on earth.

Maybe I'll cancel M&M and visit Lamont, myself. I've been told I have a very good bedside manner.

So Dr. Teri I was mindlessly switching the channels on the tv when I came across the old show "To Close for Comfort" Frankly , I didn't enjoy the show all that much watching it as a youth. I thought the storiess were mediocre to awful, the sister's didn't even look closely alike. I even found JM. bullock on the annoying side. I thought the production values of the show seemed uber cheap. I mean I really didn't like the show. Yet when I heard the theme song I got somewhat nostalgic for my youth. what gives Dr. Teri


Lamont says Hey!

Hi Dr. Teri,

First I have to thank you for the advise you gave me last month.
I left my husband, took 1/2 his money, found another man and now I am happy.
I decided to nix the plans for the peanut butter M&M cookies too. Thanks that was a dumb idea.

Can you tell me if I should be using "dark" or "light" brown sugar when I bake regular toll house cookies? The recipe on the choco-chip bag doesn't say.

Thanks again Dr. Teri,
you have been a blessing in my life.

Miss Used

Fred G. Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So Dr. Teri I was mindlessly switching the
> channels on the tv when I came across the old show
> "To Close for Comfort" Frankly , I didn't enjoy
> the show all that much watching it as a youth. I
> thought the storiess were mediocre to awful, the
> sister's didn't even look closely alike. I even
> found JM. bullock on the annoying side. I thought
> the production values of the show seemed uber
> cheap. I mean I really didn't like the show. Yet
> when I heard the theme song I got somewhat
> nostalgic for my youth. what gives Dr. Teri


Fred, that happens to all of us. A song or a scent can trigger strong memories from our youth. For most of us, childhood was a time of few responsibilities, when we felt safe and loved.

But... Fred, the mind is a funny thing. It tends to block out what we didn't like. I, for one, didn't particularly enjoy being a teenager. I wanted more freedom than my parents would permit. I was uncomfortable and self-conscious about my appearance. I wasn't blooming as fast as the other girls. (Strangely enough, despite my late blooming status, the boys who played kickball in the street with me, suddenly wanted to play strip poker)

The point is, Fred, that the smell of freshly cut grass or the sound of a water sprinkler can trigger happy memories of our youth, but our brains tend to edit those pictures. When I look at movies of my children as babies, I can feel a similar nostalgic longing for those years ... but the reality is... I tended to turn off the camera when they started crying, or hitting each other, or throwing up, or talking about the potty, or when one of them threw a cup at me, hitting me in the head, etc.

> Lamont says Hey!

Tell Lamont I did visit him, but he was sleeping, so I held his hand for a while and then quietly left.

Miss Used Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi Dr. Teri,
>
> First I have to thank you for the advise you gave
> me last month.
> I left my husband, took 1/2 his money, found
> another man and now I am happy.

Wow. You work fast.

> I decided to nix the plans for the peanut butter
> M&M cookies too. Thanks that was a dumb idea.

I would hardly call your idea, dumb.

> Can you tell me if I should be using "dark" or
> "light" brown sugar when I bake regular toll house
> cookies? The recipe on the choco-chip bag doesn't
> say.

I would use dark, and only dark.

> Thanks again Dr. Teri,
> you have been a blessing in my life.

I'm so happy to have actually made a difference.
Please let me know how your new love interest works out.
Now, don't go tying the knot too quickly. Enjoy your freedom, Miss Used.

Well Doc I was feeling a bit better today. The doc says I'm going thru male menopause. Anyways I was feeling good enough to go out and watch a basketball game in a bar. I decided not to go to the bar with the 24 yr. old bisexual waitress but went elsewhere. I kind of get a bit sad around the waitress.
So I headed elsewhere and you see doc Teri there was this 29 year old waitress and uh-oh
She had nice but strong hands but I decided to leave when the game ended. I was tired but she seemed a bit surprised I was leaving.

I do appreciate your visit I thought someone had stopped by in my drugged enhanced haze.

Doc Teri my washing machine has a funky smell. I tried a full cycle with just bleach in it hoping that might work but still has a bit of an odor. Any suggestions?

Dr. Teri, Do you think this swimsuit makes me look fat? It's getting so hard to compete with all the younger gals on the beach. I moved to Thailand for the warm weather. It's really nice here. If you see Lamont tell him I said Hi! I just read about his problems. I hope he is feeling better.

luv ya,
D.D.
Attachments:

Lamont Sanford Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Well Doc I was feeling a bit better today. The doc
> says I'm going thru male menopause.

Yes, that's what I was trying to tell you, Lamont.

> Anyways I was
> feeling good enough to go out and watch a
> basketball game in a bar. I decided not to go to
> the bar with the 24 yr. old bisexual waitress but
> went elsewhere. I kind of get a bit sad around the
> waitress.

Don't be sad. Instead, be happy that maybe you're moving beyond the bimbos. Maybe there's a real woman out there waiting for you, a woman who doesn't spend her days getting her fanny pinched while leaning over a bar. Those women might have a certain allure, but in the end, they're one shot deals, so to speak.

> So I headed elsewhere and you see doc Teri there
> was this 29 year old waitress and uh-oh
> She had nice but strong hands but I decided to
> leave when the game ended. I was tired but she
> seemed a bit surprised I was leaving.

Here's my challenge for you, Lamont. I want you to stay out of bars for thirty days. I want you to introduce yourself to women in libraries, at museums, at coffee shops, at grocery stores. For the first two weeks, I want you to limit yourself to women over 35. During the second two weeks, only chat with women over 40. Do you think you could do that for thirty days, Lamont?

> I do appreciate your visit I thought someone had
> stopped by in my drugged enhanced haze.

You're welcome, Lamont. You did mutter a few things.... some very sweet things, so I know there's more to you than a depressed middle aged man looking for a romp with a tart. BTW, when you rolled over, I noticed your hospital gown had become undone, so I went ahead and fixed it for you.

> Doc Teri my washing machine has a funky smell. I
> tried a full cycle with just bleach in it hoping
> that might work but still has a bit of an odor.
> Any suggestions?

Check your hoses, Lamont.

D.D. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri, Do you think this swimsuit makes me
> look fat?

D.D., that swimsuit makes your fake boobs look like bowling balls.

> It's getting so hard to compete with all
> the younger gals on the beach.

That's because most men only like feeling bowling balls when they're bowling.

> I moved to
> Thailand for the warm weather. It's really nice
> here.

That's good, D.D. You should stay there.

> If you see Lamont tell him I said Hi! I
> just read about his problems. I hope he is feeling
> better.

Sorry, D.D.. I told Lamont you died when your boobs exploded.

> luv ya,
> D.D.

Yeah, well, just keep your luv in Thailand. OK?

Hi Dr. Teri-,

Do you believe Mr. Misery really committed suicide and that Liz Misery, his sister is posting here?

Are we being bamboozled again?

-Lunesta Lollipop

Lunesta Lollipop Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi Dr. Teri-,
>
> Do you believe Mr. Misery really committed suicide
> and that Liz Misery, his sister is posting here?
>
> Are we being bamboozled again?
>
> -Lunesta Lollipop


At first, I thought, OMG, did we lose Mr. Misery?

So, I went to church and lit a few candles.

I became suspicious when his "sister" said she was his "brother" and had to correct herself. I thought, hmmmm, that's odd.

Then, the apology appeared. Mr. Misery wasn't dead at all.

So, I went back to church, blew out the candles and when no one was looking, grabbed my money out of that little box.

Dr Terias,

I'm in a real dark place in my life right now,,,

I've completely lost the ability to experience joy,,,

I think I might,,I'm thinking about,,, i'm gonna ,,,,



Go buy something really stupid on ebay! right now!

LOOK OUT,,,paypal comin' through!

Dr. Teri,
I left my clothing just a little too long in the washer and it has a funky smell. How do I get the smell out?

I'll try your advice but I don't want to get arrested

Hey Lamont,
Can I help with your laundry?
Attachments:

Hatemotor Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr Terias,

> I'm in a real dark place in my life right now,,,

> I've completely lost the ability to experience
> joy,,,

Hatemotor, we all live through these dark times - times when are we incapable of experiencing joy, or even imaging the possibility of joy. Never again will we experience the euphoria of romantic love, or the thrill of seeing something exquisitely beautiful, or the utter joy of laughing with abandonment. We have closed our senses to all but our agony. We can see only objects, concrete and cold, dark and without texture.

That unique essence which is who we are, has shut down; it can't function. It becomes locked in a small terrible place. Often a response to a great loss or emotional wound, this is how we mourn; this is how we cope with such anguish, and this is how we acknowledge our depth, our passion, and our capacity to love.

I, myself, have only recently emerged from such a place, a place I've only visited with such intensity, once before. A place where the world is removed from you, as you stand outside, alone, looking through a window.... quietly dying.

> I think I might,,I'm thinking about,,, i'm gonna,,,,

Don't do it, Hatemotor.

I already lit a few candles last week and I don't feel like lighting any more. Plus, I think the church has a picture of me smashing the little box to get my money back... after Mr. Misery popped back to life.

> Go buy something really stupid on ebay! right
> now!

Good one. You totally got me, Hatemotor!

> LOOK OUT,,,paypal comin' through!

Ha!

Dearest Lunesta, if'en you only had the face of Claudia Jordan

who dat?
Attachments:

D.D. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dr. Teri, Do you think this swimsuit makes me
> look fat? It's getting so hard to compete with all
> the younger gals on the beach. I moved to
> Thailand for the warm weather. It's really nice
> here. If you see Lamont tell him I said Hi! I
> just read about his problems. I hope he is feeling
> better.
>
> luv ya,
> D.D.


You are on the roof of your crib. Why are you wearing at top at all?

-----------------------------------------------

"...your suffering will be legendary even in Hell!"

Dear Lunesta, my aunt esther suggested miss jordan. she is one mighty fine looking woman and at 38 years of age falls in the category of more mature womans that Dr. Teri suggested I peruse. You settle down now Pinhead. D.D. was mine. Hello D.D. you ain't so old my little buttercup. You stay away from Bangkock. You hear,
Attachments:

OK, Ok, let's all settle down here.

My goodness, I attend an important extended business lunch/dinner with my associate, Dr. Tuttle, and all hell breaks loose.

Time for group therapy.

Lunesta, put your shirt on and get out of Lamont's room.

Lamont, put your funky smelling pants back on and sit down on your mat.

Pinhead, stop lusting after D.D. My god, we don't need another man drowning his sorrows in a couple of fake bimbo boobs.

OK, is everyone sitting down? Lamont, where are your pants? Put them on.

All right now, let's talk about what happened today while I was off with Dr. Tuttle.

What, Lamont? No, of course that's not a hickey on my neck. No, Pinhead, I am not missing a button on my shirt. And, would you please give Lunesta back her bra. Lunesta, sit like a lady. No. Lamont, I did not touch you inappropriately when you were in the hospital. What? I most certainly did not lean over and.......

Group therapy is over. Go to your rooms.

Mr. Misery... Do you know what this means?

Your username just increased in value...

Since Cary restricted the use of "." in registered names, no one else can have a username with a period in it...

Yours is the last of its kind...

Signatures are for fags

Dr. Teri, I hate the rain. Found out the waitress is moving away. Kind of sad about that. but gives me good excuse to stay away from bars for awhile. tired of the stupid conversations with future alkies I've been running into lately. Saw my reflection in the mirror at bar. bar should not have mirrors.

hikoo