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RIP - Gwen Stefani
Date: August 18, 2010 04:28PM

Naw, I'm just fucking with you. She's not dead.

gwen-stefani-23188.jpg

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http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: egweg ()
Date: August 18, 2010 04:35PM

Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl†is one of the most baffling pieces of music of the modern age. It’s got something to do with cheerleaders—that much is clear, judging from the chanting and the marching band that’s honking and tooting in the background. Beyond that, good luck deciphering the song’s ambiguities. We were so vexed by the mystery that is “Hollaback Girl†that we have devoted countless hours to its study. Our conclusions are below. The first thing you should know, though, is that Gwen is not singing “I ain’t no Harlem fat girlâ€â€”at least, we don’t think she is.

Uh huh, this my shit
Gwen is introducing us to her shit.

All the girls stomp your feet like this
This talk of shit and stomping has nothing to do with actually stepping on feces. But what does it mean? From a reading of the later text, we can conclude that the song takes place in the world of high school athletics, and that Gwen is apparently leading the girls in a calisthenics exercise. The “shit,†we surmise, is what she calls the exercises she’s teaching the other girls.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
Here, Gwen exhorts the girls to try harder as they jog around the track, reminding them that physical fitness is “not just gonna happen,†but must be worked at.

Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl
These lines are the most confusing, but their meaning will become clearer later.

Oooh, this my shit, this my shit
Gwen repeats this four more times. She wants to make sure that we are well acquainted with her shit.

I heard that you were talking shit
And you didn’t think that I would hear it
Gwen has been the victim of some slanderous high school gossip, and she doesn’t appreciate it. Gwen is 35 years old sliding into MILF status at this point, but we’ll grant her some poetic license.

People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up
So I’m ready to attack, gonna lead the pack
Gwen is going to round up a “posse†of her girlfriends and retaliate against the person who’s been talking “smack†about her.

Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out
Gwen is going to beat up the person who wronged her, after she completes the cheerleading routine that will inspire the football team to score a touchdown. Gwen has interesting priorities.

That’s right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up
It seems the entire cheerleading squad is going to beat up the person who spoke ill of Gwen; they have put down their pom-poms, and they are now “fired up†to exact swift and terrible vengeance on Gwen’s behalf.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl
Gwen is apparently the captain of the cheerleader squad; she is the girl who “hollas†the chants, not one of the girls who simply “hollas†them back. Given that the squad is preparing to beat somebody up on Gwen’s behalf, she’s picked a strange time to remind them that she is their leader and they are her sheep-like followers. Gwen obviously rules her squad with an iron fist.

Oooh, this my shit, this my shit [repeated four times]
Again with the shit.

So that’s right dude, meet me at the bleachers
No principals, no student-teachers
Both of us want to be the winner, but there can only be one
So I’m gonna fight, gonna give it my all
We learn that it was a “dude†who gossiped about Gwen. She challenges him to a fight at the bleachers. If he imagines it will be a fair, one-on-one fight, he is sadly mistaken. Gwen and her aforementioned “pack†will pounce on him like rabid wolves.

Gonna make you fall, gonna sock it to you
That’s right, I’m the last one standing, another one bites the dust
Gwen’s pack of furious cheerleaders leaves the boy a quivering, bloody heap behind the bleachers for the groundskeeper to discover the next day.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl
Having completed their ghastly work, Gwen’s squad members return to the field and resume their cheerleading activities, as Gwen reminds them once more that she is the boss and they are all her bitches.

Oooh, this my shit, this my shit [repeated four times]
By calling her exercise routines “shit,†Gwen is showing us that for all her bravado, the character in this song secretly suffers from profound self-esteem issues. She is a complex antiheroine for an age of changing gender attitudes and expectations.

Let me hear you say, this shit is bananas
B-A-N-A-N-A-S
Here, Gwen steps away from this bloody spectacle for a moment to comment on the madness and ugliness of what we’ve just witnessed, and, by extension, the petty rivalries of high school in general. This shit is bananas, Gwen tells us, and we can only agree. And lest we miss the point, she spells it out. And repeats it another three times.

A few times I’ve been around that track
So it’s not just gonna happen like that
Cause I ain’t no hollaback girl
I ain’t no hollaback girl
Back on the field, Gwen is still bullying the squad to carry out her routines. But now we see her in a new light, as the sad, lost creature she truly is.

Oooh, this my shit, this my shit [repeated four times]
As the song fades out, Gwen is left only with her “shit,†the mindless exercises that bring her no comfort from the raging emptiness within. As much as she “hollas,†no one hears her cries for help.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Date: August 18, 2010 04:40PM

egweg Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

>
> Oooh, this my shit, this my shit
> As the song fades out, Gwen is left only with her
> “shit,†the mindless exercises that bring her
> no comfort from the raging emptiness within. As
> much as she “hollas,†no one hears her cries
> for help.


Yeah. Then she cashed the fat fucking check and drove her Mercedes to her house in Malibu while the writer of that article ate Hot Pockets at her desk again for the third time this week.

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http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Harry Tuttle ()
Date: August 18, 2010 06:58PM

The bitch should've died in 1996... It's been a long, painful, downhill journey since then...

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Naw, I'm just fucking with you. She's not dead.
>
>

Signatures are for fags

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Date: August 18, 2010 07:43PM

i got my hopes up for nothing... ='(

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Warhawk ()
Date: August 18, 2010 07:54PM

Well played. I laughed when I read the initial post. Let me quote Brian Griffin of Family Guy: "I don't know what a holler back girl is, all I know is that I want her dead."

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: 496 ()
Date: August 18, 2010 08:11PM

Is she still married to that 1 hit wonder?

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: August 18, 2010 08:16PM

egweg sounds a bit too much like American Psycho in his analysis of Hollaback Girl.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Troll@AOL ()
Date: August 18, 2010 08:29PM

Haha. Why does this puzzle you so?

'Holler-back girl' as in; you meet a gal you know you don't have a snowballs chance in hell with, at say, a public gathering. And your fat ugly ass gives the chic your number(or digitz), whilst 'puttin the mac on', and lamely exits the conversation with a 'holler back girl', as though she might be some 'un-kay' type of hoe that would ever consider entertaining such foolish numbskullery. So she "ain't no holler back girl" because not only will she NOT be calling you back or 'hollerin back' she would not even give you the time of day -past not being rude that is.

The video is as mindless as the fools it is about.


.

==================================================================================
"Why don't you LOSERS just pack your flower print DOUCHE BAGS
and get your stoopid @$$#$ THE FUCK OFF MY INTERNETZ!"

- 'philscamms' (the YT Watchdog) ; internet & YouTube® extraordinaire.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: August 18, 2010 08:32PM

Harry Tuttle Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The bitch should've died in 1996... It's been a
> long, painful, downhill journey since then...
>
> WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Naw, I'm just fucking with you. She's not dead.
> >
> >

Blessed are the murderous.
Attachments:
troll.jpg

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: August 18, 2010 08:33PM

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Naw, I'm just fucking with you. She's not dead.
>
>


She still looks fucking hot for someone her age.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Teh King ()
Date: August 19, 2010 09:09AM

eesh Wrote:
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> She still looks fucking hot for someone her age.

No age qualifier necessary for Gwen at this point, even at 41 years. She's hotter than most of overfed fat-fuck chicks in this country that are HALF her age.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Adreienne Najjar-Keith ()
Date: August 19, 2010 10:36AM

She should be dead. What a no-talent bitch.

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Re: RIP - Gwen Stefani
Posted by: Teh King ()
Date: August 19, 2010 07:12PM

Adreienne Najjar-Keith Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> She should be dead. What a no-talent bitch.


I'm sure she has hidden talents.

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