Was it JeffersOnion or Honest Abe that said we have nothing to fear but fear and our bowels? Cant recall. Anyway peanut butter shit anal meltdown continues. Im averaging 3 pr undies a day.

Two beef Whoppers, two spicy chicken sandwiches and large fries for lunch. Hope my bowels can handle it... of course they will!

Dad is wearing a Hazmat suit and the neighbor has inserted the suit's snorkel into his rectum and is farting/eliminating into dad's suit and he frantically tries to unzip it and get out. Grandma is entertaining her large african american suiter while mom chain smokes Salem Lights in the carport. Ive dipped into our organic dried fava beans to make a spicy humus and free range okra dip...

After eating popcorn it feels like Im pushing out gravel or thorns. Why is this happening to me?

I have shit a couple times where the shit is coming out sideways not long ways

I was thinking today about how wonderful it would be to have Jennifer Lawrence in my bathroom while I was sitting on the groan thrown. She could be massaging my feet as I give birth to my brown babies. Perhaps she could hum "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" since it soothes me so. I would do the same to her, but I would sing the song "All the Pretty Ladies" by that Colored lady Beyonce.

Interesting. Jennifer Lawrence could be my granddaughter but it would be better than midwives. Or the damned gastrointestinal doctors who don’t care.

Concerned Pigeon Brooder Wrote:
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> After eating popcorn it feels like Im pushing out
> gravel or thorns. Why is this happening to me?


Popcorn can cause lots of bowel problems unfortunately.

Brown Onion Wrote:
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> Interesting. Jennifer Lawrence could be my
> granddaughter but it would be better than
> midwives. Or the damned gastrointestinal doctors
> who don’t care.


Just because the doctors are not interested in listening to your filthy feculent fantasies, that doesn't mean they don't care. Perhaps they want you to get better instead of living in your potty obsessed world. Why don't you ever talk about the things you are doing to alleviate your difficulties? The truth is you savor your fixation.

I often can’t control myself when eating cherries, I always swallow the pits, after eating 2 pounds, it makes the next couple bowel movements exhausting

It think you may have a fixation issue. Not a head Doc or nothing, but I know a guy. He's in teaching at this big university. He thinks maybe, just maybe, there is a chance you're having a problem with how to spell Thyme's.

We must respect our elders. I have gone out of my way to bring pleasing thoughts to the bowel's threads. Brown Onion doesn't say it, but I know he appreciates it.
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Gerrymanderer2 (G2, the OP original poster or spammer just above, perhaps both) posts several lies on ffu daily - many think he's a fx co gov worker who is getting paid to do it for false DNC democrat "advertising". He floods ffu with useless posts to bump down major news, demoralize americans. G2 posts fecal matter, mutilated bodies, child porn, foreign drug ads and sneaker ads, tells people to kill themselves and government should seize them and put them on psych pills in prison without a trial - decided by DNC democrats gov workers, promotes kangaroo courthouse trials, gives anti-religious rants, gives satanic ritual rants, posts black males with large dicks on white young females, portends white low birth rate and fall of USA whites, suggestive of food tampering/poisoning to solve the white problem, and anything possible to demoralize any americans on ffu - all of which are fake news he never responds to proofs it is fake. (perhaps g2 is a chinese prisoner or isis member - but definitely knowledgeable of fx co gov from the inside at times). The website operator has told him "not to post or return" (in an existing post by the sysop): not because of a political leaning but for continual illegal and gross spam along with messages that are only to demoralize if not kill others. G2 plays at financial terrorism as well; continually reporting fake and false financial data. G2 fakes emergency pleas to deaden the real response to any real one - like a devil. G2 continually spams FFU - which all users complain of: it is a real DoS attack - the attacks are not just topic bumps but designed to inject key words to kill ffu and google search results. G2 continually promotes drug use, alcoholic experimentation, and tries to convince members to meet hookers using photos from the 1990's (i doubt any that did are not arrested or dead). G2 continually posts racist posts and gay posts egging others to comment - then attacks who does - AND RECORDS IT (likely for political extortion). G2 and dems MONITOR AND RECORD* "conservatives who blast out these democrat lies and illegal abuse of telephone privilege (sometimes in a raw manner, being so jaded by the job)" (users who object to G2's actions listed so far). One ffu member discovered a south american country recording FFU databasing all posts in a non-chat database format - and when questioned - another member quickly said it was all coincidence and that this was done everywhere in the world on all sites: WHICH IS A LIE. Not all countries record the every word of what fairfaxians say on blogs. Extortion is also mentioned by G2. And the idea he's fishing for comments he can use against anyone who'd run for office is "just assume he's in that business" - and i've warned others that is what he fishes for - excuses to attack conservatives and or to extort them.

SOME POSTERS ON FFU FEEL G2 IS A JOKER: I ASSURE YOU THE ABOVE COMPLAINTS ARE GENUINELY A THREAT TO ONLOOKERS (THE UN-INTIATED), NON-DEMOCRATS, AND TO ANYONE STATING THAT LAWS SHOULD BE IMPOSED ON DEMOCRATS EQUALLY AS DEMOCRATS IMPOSE THEM ON OTHERS: MONEY

LEGAL NOTICE: DEMOCRATS HAVE `SWATTED' THE HOMES OF SOME FFU POSTS WHO REFUTE G2 AND CALL DEMS OUT ON THEFT AND LIES - AND EXPOSE THE LAWS THEY COULD BE PROSECUTED FOR BREACH OF TRUST. THAT'S A CONFIRMED WITNESSED FACT. IT IS NO JOKE WHAT G2 IS DOING. HIS CONTINUAL FISHING IS NOT IDLE - THEY ARE TRIGGERED AND ARMED. which i've warned others about since, about 2010 - that G2 is fishing for men to "erase" politically, by any means available to him


GO BACK TO HELL G2. YOU ARE EXPOSED.

DROP DEAD G2. STOP DoS attacking FFU.

DROP DEAD

wonder if the all caps in bold guy actually thinks anyone reads his rubbish. I dont. My bowels are the peanut butter ones so things are messy

I know when my asshole starts itching the peanutbutter shit in my rectum has melted out. I go to the bathroom and get the tp and wipe - its just like I just had a movement - paper is filled with levin's. Handwashing and underwear change follows. Why is this happening to me?

Butter biscuits with breakfast and hashbrowns. Take that bowels.

Jiff Creamy Style Onion Wrote:
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> I know when my asshole starts itching the
> peanutbutter shit in my rectum has melted out. I
> go to the bathroom and get the tp and wipe - its
> just like I just had a movement - paper is filled
> with levin's. Handwashing and underwear change
> follows. Why is this happening to me?

There is a solution for that. Get a fucking bidet you idiot.


If you are too poor to afford a fixture, you can build yourself a redneck bidet for less than $20.


Nobody wants to hear about your stupid complaints that you are unwilling to address yourself. Now kindly Fuck Off. You are boring.

That feel when you rush to the bathroom to check if that fart was really a shart and you look down and see the brown-yellow liquid. That temporary amazement at how you couldnt tell you just filled your underwear. Is it denial or just body temp liquid fooling your skin. Science needs to answer...

If being a hate-filled bigot wasn't enough.

Brown Onions thinks his awful daydreams teach people bowels.


And then there the midwives.
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