My brother saw this on another bulletin board and emailed it to me. I would welcome your opines.

________________________________
It is true that lawn people suck. Every time I go to Wolf Trap, I see some young people so loaded down with coolers and blankets that they cant huff it up the hill from the parking lot. They actually wait in line at the tunnel with their booty and load it up on the golf cart and are chauffeured up the hill. If you cant carry it, do not bring it. They suck. Those golf carts are for handicapped and other deserving people, not you and your nachos and beer. Lawn people do suck.

I love it parking at wolf trap and seeing lawn people unload their trunks with everything known to man. Gatorade, pizza, beer, wine, chips, extra large blanket etc. We would hate to see you lawn people go hungry!

I agree also about leaving. Lawn people 2 breast with a cooler which requires two people to carry and I cant get around them. I have said "excuse me" many times and it gets me nowhere but twiddling my thumbs walking behind them because they take up the whole sidewalk and are walking slow because they are bogged down.

Getting in is worse. Lawn people waiting for other to arrive. They have their coolers etc and all lawn people say the same thing "I will meet you at the front gate". So while lawn people are waiting - many of them and many more coolers- us pavilion people have to go through an obstacle course just to get inside the place.

I love, though, going inside the gate and then watching the lawn people entering behind me. With the fortitude of Nelson at Trafalgar, they start scoping for a plot of land. Then they start shouting "over here"" and then I hear "no, over here!" and that goes on and on. And when they finally settle in for an evening of music and gorging, they defend there land like it is their castle ( a castle with chips and beer).

So it is 90 degrees out and lawn people whip out their deli trays. More mayonnaise please. Yes I would like some tuna for my cracker. "UMMM in this humidity, the salami looks juicy". And to make sure I don't get sick, I will wash it down with lots of beer. They suck.

And do not bring a date to the lawn, especially a first date. "Sorry sweetie, I bought the lawn tickets, we schlepped all our goodies up here, now we are sitting in the way back and it is hot and looks like rain. I am all sweaty and you have that womanly glistening. Before it rains, would you like some cheese whiz for your crackers?" This will not impress her.

If you want to be sophisticated on the lawn, yea bring a bottle of wine (nothing larger than half a gallon please" and sit and listen to the opera. Do not go to crowded pop concert and expect to be sophisticated sitting on the ground with 5000 other people who are drinking more than you and smelling just as bad as you.

Dignity, it is a good thing.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/19/2007 07:38PM by Radiophile.

Sorry bro, just don't care. I wanted to, though. I really did try to give a damn about "lawn people." But then I thought, "Hey, we're in the middle of World War III with the towelheads. Gas prices are going through the roof, my mortgage is eating me up, my commute gets worse with every passing day, the Toll Road is getting more expensive. It's 95 degrees and stormy every day. I've got to pay for insanely expensive college tuition for two kids starting in 10 years. Medicare and Social Security are going bankrupt, and I'll never be able to save enough in my 401K to retire comfortably."

But don't worry, Radioboy, I'm going to dig deep and see if there is some molecule in my body that cares about "lawn people" and I'll then get back to you ASAP. But please, whatever you do, never give up the fight against those rotten grass-eaters.

Godspeed, John Glenn.

LOL.

Num Nut = "People are stupid. The whole world can go to hell for all I care".

So many people at FFXU own there own homes outright, have 2 or 3 rental properties, and have a fully funded 401(k) and prepaid tuition for there kids (or so they claim). It is a breath of fresh air to hear someone who says what the real problems most Americans are facing
* Underfunded retirement accounts
* anger at the war and the $ the war will cost us now, and 50 years from now.
* rising tuition
* large amounts of debt
* rising cost of health care

I am so glad this illegal immigration thing will unite us all - because THAT is the most important social issue facing us Americans!

Well I went to a few Jimmy Buffett concerts and there is no way you can bring much of anything into a concert there let alone the lawn seats. Most of the lawn seat people were very well behaved. The time I did have a really good seat, there were people smoking smelly cigars and collegee kids throwing up behind me. I will take the lawn seat crowd over them anyday.

Trickie

Radiophile Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It is a breath of
> fresh air to hear someone who says what the real
> problems most Americans are facing

you are forgetting a serious problem: VA taxes on yachts. just because i have three doesnt mean VA should charge me a jillion dollars in property taxes. rat bastards.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

Gravis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Radiophile Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > It is a breath of
> > fresh air to hear someone who says what the
> real
> > problems most Americans are facing
>
> you are forgetting a serious problem: VA taxes on
> yachts. just because i have three doesnt mean VA
> should charge me a jillion dollars in property
> taxes. rat bastards.

Oh my God (Christian), you are absolutely right. The tax on yachts issue is a major issue that ALL of of "Republican cloth coat" wearing people can get behind.

Forget health care, the war, the deficit etc. Illegal immigration and yacht tax is probably the most important issue facing the US today.

I sent an email to the Grandy and Andy morning show. I quoted the facts you provided me with - you are being taxed a "jillion dollars" on your three yachts. How absurb! Has the Commonwealth no sence of decency?

If they tax yachts - next they will tax your inheritance. And then what will your slacker kids do? They might have to go through life with just a pawltrey few million dollars and then have to get a job. Again, has the Commonwealth no sence of decency?

I for one, as I know many of you have, spent many a sleepless night worrying about whether Paris Hilton, The Mars kids, or the Gallo offspring will have their inheritance taxed. It is an issue that affects some of us, therefore it affects all of us.

Repeal the tax on yachts now Richmond - or you will loose the vote of us cloth coat wearing Republicans. It is morally the right thing to do!

For decades, the capitalists who ran private equity, venture and hedge funds managed to convince Congress that the 20 percent carried-interest profit share they took on deals wasn't ordinary income (taxed at up to 35 percent) but a capital gain (taxed at 15 percent), even though they typically were risking almost none of their own capital. This gross inequity was taken as a financial fact of nature. moguls are paying a lower tax rate than the people who cleaned their offices

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/07/18/AR2007071801967.html

I am now a lawn convert. Lawn people don't suck nearly as much as pavilion-seated people. You'd think people paid for ticket just to have the experience of leaving and coming back over and over again. Rush at Nissan was like watching the show through windshield wipers. The next show I went to I was on the lawn and had a much better time... I didn't bring any crap with me though and wouldn't bother with all that... that's what tailgating is for. But I'm a lawn convert and proud of it.

Nissan, if I remember correctly, will not let lawn people bring food or beverages into the place - they want you to buy their reasonably priced food and drinks.

Wolf Trap is the only concert venue I know of to let the public bring in food and drink.

Nissan's reason for their policy? Terrorist concerns.

Num Nut Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> But then I thought, "Hey, we're in the
> middle of World War III with the towelheads. Gas
> prices are going through the roof, my mortgage is
> eating me up, my commute gets worse with every
> passing day, the Toll Road is getting more
> expensive. It's 95 degrees and stormy every day.
> I've got to pay for insanely expensive college
> tuition for two kids starting in 10 years.
> Medicare and Social Security are going bankrupt,
> and I'll never be able to save enough in my 401K
> to retire comfortably."




As Dennis Leary once said,

"it's bad enough we have people complaining about problems in life, much less their own...the new medicine and advice doctors should be giving is 'shut the fuck up and move on'"

:)

I remember a few years back went to see Chris Isaak. Sitting on the lawn couldnt really see anything til the end of the show he comes running up the aisle and does an impromptu performance for us Lawn people. that was pretty cool

These "lawn people" are at the root of all of our problems. We must do something about these "people" and their preference for "lawn." A solution, maybe. An ultimate solution.

People who sit on the lawn at Wolf Trap suck. They are the most arrogant people when it comes to marked territory of their blankets. Don't ever step on their blanket or they will angrily tell everyone around you what you did. They bring in enough food to feed an army, and their big coolers are just obnoxious. To save a few bucks, they have to get to the show three hours early, and wait. Many take turns walking around acting superior to everyone else because they feel they are professional concert goers because they came with all that food in the cooler and blankets and lawn chairs. After sitting out on their blankets for several hours they begin to stink as well. And they eat and eat and drink. Why not just rent a DVD and sit at home? And they all think they are superior to others on the lawn. Well let me tell you one thing; I go to five or six shows a year. I arrive 45 minutes before show time and sit outside the fence with my wife and have a leisurely dinner of something I picked up after work. I walk in 15 minutes before Showtime finishing my third beer and I hit the head. Then I causally walk past around the lawn people and down the hill. I enter the pavilion around row R and precede down the stairs up to my seat. I say hello to the usher and my wife and I sit down three to five minutes before Showtime. I get paranoid that those slobs on the lawn will one day figure the ushers are either college age girls of old ladies and the cheap slobs on the lawn will storm the pavilion. When I leave, I have to leave during the encore because I have to get ahead of of all those lawn people who muck everything up clumsily carrying their all their stuff back to their car. Lawn people suck.

I haven't been to Wolf Trap, but I don't like the lawn thing in general. Too many bugs and you usually can't see shit. Oh, an if it's wet...

I'll bring an extra large cooler for you nest time.

Lawn Guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'll bring an extra large cooler for you nest
> time.

which one of you jerks is a bird?


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

ferfux Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I remember a few years back went to see Chris
> Isaak. Sitting on the lawn couldnt really see
> anything til the end of the show he comes running
> up the aisle and does an impromptu performance for
> us Lawn people. that was pretty cool


Wolf Trap is what the people in the business call a "shed", an outdoor facillity with a pavilion and a lawn. Artists do what is called a "shed tour" and they play "sheds" all over the country.

Issak's performance was not "impromptu". It was well rehearsed adn he did the same "impromptu" lawn show the night before and the next shed he played.

George Thorogood was one of the originators of performing from the lawn or balcony. Diehard Jimmy Buffett fans know he routinely plays the first 2-3 sons from the stage then does an "impromptu" 2 songs on the lawn.

Isaak was not overcome with the moment and ran out to the lawn. It was done before and will be done again. Yes it is cool, but no that original.

Chris Isaak/George Thorogood/Jimmy Buffet/"shed tour/lawn show"

O Thank me Lord for I have truly been saved from hell on earth.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/20/2007 11:38PM by TheMeeper.

Chris Isaak was in the lawn because he was selling T-Shirts at some other act's concert.

You know you're in Fairfax when Chris Isaak is out rockin in the lawn

On the lawn, Chris Isaak autographs $35.00 T-shirts after his show. The shed poster was exactly right. Mann Music in Philly, Nikon at Jones Beach, BoA Pavilion, Tweeter in Camden, are all sheds that host the same available touring acts each summer. Over the past few years Casinos have gotten into the game and now regular summer touring acts like Chris Isaak, Moody Blues, Huey Lewis, The Beach Boys (and friends), and The Indigo Girls, will intersperse Casino shows on their regular shed tour. But this has nothing to do with why lawn people suck.

. Yes, Lawn people lay down to watch a concert, kinda like watching TV, their favorite activity. Those poor slobs disobey mother’s rule to “sit up and listen.” They stretch out their blankets like they are having a picnic- a picnic with three thousand others! Then they wait for hours. I saw Joss Stone and sat front row center in the pit. Did you know Wolf Trap charges 75 bucks each for pit seats? Anyway, there I am sitting down hands folded, and watching the show. I only stand up when every else does so I let the people behind me (and when you are sitting front row center, that is practically everyone) can see. I am polite that way. On the other hand, lawn people are reclining with a bottle of wine or a can of beer like a hobo in a Brooklyn alley. Lawn people suck.

If I acted like a lawn person at the Joss Stone show and fully reclined with a bottle of wine in the front row, what do you think Joss would have said when she saw it? She would have said, "You suck!" Remember, Joss can't see the thousands on the lawn, who can also barely see her, doing just that -lying around like drunken hobos.

And when they leave the concert, lawn people walk side by side carrying the oversized coolers making it difficult for others to get around them. That really pisses me off!

Lawn People suck!

And lawn people have no problem phoning friends to say “Hey I’m at the show.” These people are 150 yards from the stage and can’t really see a thing! They might as well have not bought the $25.00 ticket and just picnicked a few yards away, OUTSIDE THE GATE!

Sheesh. If it wasnt spontanious then it was still great showmanship. Do you cranks go around telling kids that Santa aint real? Or walk past a line of Harry Potter fans chanting, "DumbleDore DIES page 193!"

ferfux Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sheesh. If it wasnt spontanious then it was still
> great showmanship. Do you cranks go around
> telling kids that Santa aint real? Or walk past a
> line of Harry Potter fans chanting, "DumbleDore
> DIES page 193!"


Thanks! I was only on page 102, you have saved me a lot of time. And if it wasnt a spontaneous side show on the lawn - how did he know his wireless apparatus's would work out there.

George Thorogood used to have two roadies following him when he did the lawn/balcony thing. They were holding/adjusting a very long guitar cord. Now that takes talent.

And "impromptu" or spontaneous can sometimes go wrong - very wrong. I remember a Duran Duran concert at merriweather 12 years ago. During Wild Boys, Simon went off stage into the crowd with a bunch of Merriweather bozos - I mean security- around him. As he was about half way through the pavilion, someone in the audience reached out to touch him. A bozo threw a punch at the interloper - missed - and hit Simon. Without missing a beat Simon planted a self defense punch at the security guard and knocked him to the ground. Simon went back to the stage as the other bozos carried their fallen comrade out. Now that was showmanship.

I don't understand this thread. It's like you want to bitch about something, but you ran out of things for socialist douchebags to whine about, so now you're picking on...people who sit on lawns at concerts? A few mintes of my life I'll never get back [sigh]

When offered I'll take lawn seats over being trapped in some seat for hours. Lawn seats are awesome because you can lay back and relax.

As for a date on the lawn; I've had several perfect dates at Wolf Trap on the lawn. For one date I bought one of those yuppie luxury small picnic baskets with all the checker stuff. I filled the basket with wine, cheese, fresh fruit and a nice dessert.

Being the good ole boy beer drinker that I am, the girl I went with was very impressed by the wine and picnic setup.

Lawn seats are risk, but well worth it!

Lurker,you mave hit on an important point; perhaps many of these lawn people have big buttocks that don’t fit comfortably into the pavilion seats.

You know, when I walk in to wolf trap, I always see the same scenario, two college age kids on a date and were excited to see a concert. They show up 45 minutes early with their lawn tickets, and are horrified at the fact that in front of them there is no real estate to be had except for on the hill behind the side walk or on the side were there is no line of sight.

They look at those in full reclining mode on their blankets in front of them, people that have been beached like that for hours drinking and gorging in the sun, and they think to themselves "lawn people suck!," and vow to never to be a lawn person again.

We in the pavilion, will welcome these lawn converts as long as they play by the pavilion rules-no gorging, no reclining, if you have to use the rest room, wait till a song is over and there is applause before you leave your seat or return back to your seat, no dancing after the third song.

We in the pavilion try to be civilized, and courteous to the people behind us and around us, as well as the performers on stage in front of us. Lawn people , on the other hand, feel eating and drinking needs to be at least 50% of the concert experience.

In literature, they call that sloth and gula (gluttony).

Lurker. Wrote:
For one
> date I bought one of those yuppie luxury small
> picnic baskets with all the checker stuff. I
> filled the basket with wine, cheese, fresh fruit
> and a nice dessert.
>
> Being the good ole boy beer drinker that I am, the
> girl I went with was very impressed by the wine
> and picnic setup.
>

See, this is the point. The lawn people remember fondly the food and the wine and the artist the supposedly went to see is irrelevant. It is all about "hey look at me I am eating and drinking while sitting on the grass!" You know who else eats and drinks while sitting on the grass? Homeless people.

He also did not remember much of anything about the date, except she was so impressed with his set up, nothing ever became of the relationship.

Hey, I was thinking, since Fairfax underground people like the lawn at wolf trap, lets have a big party on the lawn for the Squeeze concert next week. We can all bring lots of food, beer and wine, and have a blast. We should not allow any of those snobs in the pavillion to participate as well.

Please be there by 6:00 PM when the gates open, the first band, big head Todd, starts at 8:00 PM and squeeze wont be on till around 8:45 PM so we will have almost three hours to eat, drink and be merry before Squeeze hits the stage! Lawn seats are like 25 bucks so all of Fairfax Underground can come. We can pool all of our food on a couple of blankets and have like a like a pot luck dinner! I can bring a couple of pies, nachos & dip. Sounds like a plan? What would you like to bring for our lawn party? We will need drinks, Doritos Fritos, sandwiches, potato chips, fried chicken, subs, etc.

When the food is all gone, we can drink heavily while listening to Squeeze sing about drinking heavily! I will be at the front gate with my two coolers and blanket, by 4:30 PM. I am blonde, weigh about 240, and will be wearing a black dress (it is so slimming).

The lawn will be rocking for Squeeze and Fairfax Underground.