I am so confused about how to file for Divorce. I want Pro Se, since i can't afford a Lawyer... Can any one help me?

... all the instructions & forms are just confusing...

http://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/courts/circuit/divorce.htm

google: it's useful.

thanks... but I had already started there...

There are brochure/instructions along with Fill-In forms, but the instructions are contradicting in explaining how to file.

Upon filing I need a Final Decree... How am I supposed to get that if its not final yet

Virginia should make getting married just as difficult (i.e.paperwork) as getting divorced.

Much less of a quandry then, eh?

______________________________________________
I have had to change the addresses to my retaliatory blogs over half a dozen times.

Mimi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> thanks... but I had already started there...
>
> There are brochure/instructions along with Fill-In
> forms, but the instructions are contradicting in
> explaining how to file.
>
> Upon filing I need a Final Decree... How am I
> supposed to get that if its not final yet

if you cant figure it out then hire a lawyer. if you cant hire a lawyer then stay married. you really should have taken this marriage thing a lot more serious.


statistically, 50% of marriages fail but im convinced 45% are from idiots who get married every three years.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

If you have children, you really need a lawyer. Without one you could lose rights to visitation, custody, etc etc.

If your spouse doesn't know he's getting divorced, you probably need a lawyer. You could lose rights to any spousal support, shared property, etc.

There are books in the libraries by a company called Nolo about how to file pro-se divorce. I'd strongly recommend putting on your concentratin' hat and sit down with one of Nolo's books.

Summarizing the pamphlet, and I AM NOT A LAWYER:

1. Fill 2 copies of the complaint form (from clerks office), where you specify the grounds for divorce. If its no fault you both need to have been seperated for 6 months or 1 year.

2. Fill out form VS-2 (clerks office) in black ink, without making any corrections

3. Fill out two copies of the Divorce Case Coversheet (clerks office)

4. Figure out how you will "serve" your spouse:

4a. You can have your spouse simply sign the Form CC-1406 under oath with a notary public if he's OK with the divorce.

4b. If he's not in agreement or aware of the divorce, and lives in Virginia, you can have the sheriff serve him. You will pay $12 in step 5.

4c. If he doesn't live in Virginia, or can't be found, you can place an ad in the paper. You can only do this in certain situations, AND you will need to fill out more forms. Look at the pamphlet on page 7.

4d. You can use a professional process server.

5. Take all of those forms, including your checkbook to pay the fees, to the clerk's office. you will be assigned a case number. The wheels of justice will begin.

6. Your husband will get served, or you will place the ad in the paper.. If he didn't sign form CC-1406. He has various rights, including contesting the divorce or the terms of the divorce or whatever. If he exercises those rights, it goes to trial. Find a lawyer.

7. If he does not contest the divorce, it will proceed to some kind of a hearing where you clear up how everything is divided and whatnot.

8. The judge signs the Final Decree. You can also have some kind of form signed to return to your maiden name.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/21/2009 04:44PM by jimmy jingles.

To: Fairfaxdude:

...I totally agree... getting married was too easy... just present ID and pay 30 bucks!

To: Gravis;

... I don't appreciate your comments. You don't know exactly what my situation is... unfortunately, I married at 18 into a domestic abusing relationship. I have now been separated about 1-1/2 years and am ready to put everything behind me and was just asking for help. It took me 10 years to get the nerve to ask for it and you have to be rude about it.

To: Jimmy Jingles:

...Thank you very very very much... I appreciate your input. You made the process much more easy to understand. Thank you :)

The name Mimi always reminds me of that train wreck on the Drew Carey show.

It reminds me of some horrible science show crazy old Ms Ray made us watch in 7th grade science at LBSS.. "Voyage of the Mimi"




496 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The name Mimi always reminds me of that train
> wreck on the Drew Carey show.

Voyage of the Mimi was Ben Affleck's debut performance, IIRC

Mimi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> >
> To: Gravis;
>
> ... I don't appreciate your comments. You don't
> know exactly what my situation is...
> unfortunately, I married at 18 into a domestic
> abusing relationship. I have now been separated
> about 1-1/2 years and am ready to put everything
> behind me and was just asking for help. It took me
> 10 years to get the nerve to ask for it and you
> have to be rude about it.
>
Why is Gravis so mean? I would like to understand why a person enjoys being hated by so many people....

Any shrinks out there?

fascinated by Gravis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mimi Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > >
> > To: Gravis;
> >
> > ... I don't appreciate your comments. You don't
> > know exactly what my situation is...
> > unfortunately, I married at 18 into a domestic
> > abusing relationship. I have now been separated
> > about 1-1/2 years and am ready to put
> everything
> > behind me and was just asking for help. It took
> me
> > 10 years to get the nerve to ask for it and you
> > have to be rude about it.
> >
> Why is Gravis so mean? I would like to understand
> why a person enjoys being hated by so many
> people....
>
> Any shrinks out there?




Simple actually. His posts on this site solicit him much needed attention. When attention starved you will relish in it no matter the context. If the only attention he can receive in life is through the internet, being an asshole, then i guess thats better than nothing i suppose.

Needs a hug. Needs a simple "how are you?" from time to time which can bring about empathy. applied even to strangers (even on a message board).

unfortunately his behavior is encouraged and positively reinforced by certain people on the forum which gives him the go ahead to continue, as if this is acceptable behavior. I am a humurous individual as well, but find the majority of his comments tacky and flat out dumb.

Normally a post like this will lead to a picture of a cat, or owl, with a caption that is intended to be funny. When uncreative folks lack wit or creativity, they will often resort to expressing their opinions (or lack of) via pictures.

hope this helps?

Does this look like a Train Wreck Actress or a Boat?
Attachments:

I happen to agree with Gravis. He is not mean; he is realistic. Come on, you all know how people get married just because of marrying. Actions have consequences. Marrying at 18 was a stupid thing to do in the first place. Oh! you say but I was only 18! Yes, that is the stupid part. You are not ready for marriage at 18. When things are good marry but when things fall apart cut and run! Nice.

Murder is the quickest way to dissolve a marriage. Second quickest is adultery.

I can help with either one. Let me know if you need assistance.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

Mimi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Does this look like a Train Wreck Actress or a
> Boat?


Sweetheart, those are average looks at best. There are a million oher latino women out there that look just like you. BTW, do you enjoy anal?

Who said she is Latina DickWad

posting your picture here was not a good idea

OMG, this could get interesting fast....

Mimi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Does this look like a Train Wreck Actress or a
> Boat?

Um, you left the other earring in my car last night. Meet me at the Tysons Harris Teeter parking lot after work and I'll return it.

yea
Attachments:

Mimi - look into an arbitrator or divorce mediator. Much less expensive than a lawyer and they can help sew up all the paperwork.

Mimi Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> To: Gravis;
>
> ... I don't appreciate your comments. You don't
> know exactly what my situation is...
> unfortunately, I married at 18 into a domestic
> abusing relationship. I have now been separated
> about 1-1/2 years and am ready to put everything
> behind me and was just asking for help. It took me
> 10 years to get the nerve to ask for it and you
> have to be rude about it.

welcome to the internet!


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

s



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/02/2010 12:18AM by inkahootz.

Persians don't have noses that look like they were flattened with a shovel.....

I liked your post of the divorce procedures in step-by-step fashion. It was informative AND entertaining!

Something from the picture tells me she is not 18. Arbitrators, mediators, vibrators, she'll be needing all of the community services Fairfax can offer.

Jebus Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I liked your post of the divorce procedures in
> step-by-step fashion. It was informative AND
> entertaining!
>
> Something from the picture tells me she is not 18.
> Arbitrators, mediators, vibrators, she'll be
> needing all of the community services Fairfax can
> offer.


Pay attention. She never said she was 18. She said she married at 18, she also said it took her ten years to just ask for help, that would make her at least 28.

jimmy jingles Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> If you have children, you really need a lawyer.
> Without one you could lose rights to visitation,
> custody, etc etc.
>
> If your spouse doesn't know he's getting divorced,
> you probably need a lawyer. You could lose rights
> to any spousal support, shared property, etc.
>
> There are books in the libraries by a company
> called Nolo about how to file pro-se divorce. I'd
> strongly recommend putting on your concentratin'
> hat and sit down with one of Nolo's books.
>
> Summarizing the pamphlet, and I AM NOT A LAWYER:
>
> 1. Fill 2 copies of the complaint form (from
> clerks office), where you specify the grounds for
> divorce. If its no fault you both need to have
> been seperated for 6 months or 1 year.
>
> 2. Fill out form VS-2 (clerks office) in black
> ink, without making any corrections
>
> 3. Fill out two copies of the Divorce Case
> Coversheet (clerks office)
>
> 4. Figure out how you will "serve" your spouse:
>
> 4a. You can have your spouse simply sign the Form
> CC-1406 under oath with a notary public if he's OK
> with the divorce.
>
> 4b. If he's not in agreement or aware of the
> divorce, and lives in Virginia, you can have the
> sheriff serve him. You will pay $12 in step 5.
>
> 4c. If he doesn't live in Virginia, or can't be
> found, you can place an ad in the paper. You can
> only do this in certain situations, AND you will
> need to fill out more forms. Look at the pamphlet
> on page 7.
>
> 4d. You can use a professional process server.
>
> 5. Take all of those forms, including your
> checkbook to pay the fees, to the clerk's office.
> you will be assigned a case number. The wheels of
> justice will begin.
>
> 6. Your husband will get served, or you will place
> the ad in the paper.. If he didn't sign form
> CC-1406. He has various rights, including
> contesting the divorce or the terms of the divorce
> or whatever. If he exercises those rights, it goes
> to trial. Find a lawyer.
>
> 7. If he does not contest the divorce, it will
> proceed to some kind of a hearing where you clear
> up how everything is divided and whatnot.
>
> 8. The judge signs the Final Decree. You can also
> have some kind of form signed to return to your
> maiden name.



very detailed - but didn't U leave out the PSA - you'll have to work one up, agree on it and then each sign and give the original to the Court - also you'll need to leave apart and separate (I think 6 mos?? ) but there is some kinda rule about that as well good luck - I say just walk away - unless they are kids -

what

Lifer Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> but didn't U leave out the PSA -
> you'll have to work one up, agree on it and then
> each sign and give the original to the Court -
> also you'll need to leave apart and separate (I
> think 6 mos?? ) but there is some kinda rule about
> that as well good luck - I say just walk away -
> unless they are kids -

I'll try to translate - PSA is property settlement agreement; IIRC if the marriage lasted less than ten years and there are no children you must live apart for a minimum of six months before the divorce decree is granted. If the marriage lasted longer than ten years and/or there are children, the time required for living apart is one full year.

jimmy jingles Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> what
>
> Lifer Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > but didn't U leave out the PSA -
> > you'll have to work one up, agree on it and
> then
> > each sign and give the original to the Court -
> > also you'll need to leave apart and separate (I
> > think 6 mos?? ) but there is some kinda rule
> about
> > that as well good luck - I say just walk away
> -
> > unless they are kids -

Would you like to have 1 or 2 DONUT with me?

COPS

loved your comment the best.
what a nice way to win a lady's heart - ask her out to donuts
i've never tried it before, but i might give it a shot

by the way,
she doesn't look latina
she looks like she is from Pakistan
look closely - her eyes and nose and such

Mimi,

Good for you for leaving an abusive relationship, and good luck to you now!

I'm glad you got some useful advice on divorce, and I agree with the poster who advised going to the library and getting a good resource by Nolo.

But please don't take any more bait from the (mostly bored guys, I'm guessing) on this message board. If you could take down your photo, that would probably be a good idea just so you won't have to suffer any more abuse. You are certainly right to be proud of your appearance, but unfortunately, you will probably get a bunch of hurtful comments as responses, just because that's the kind of banter that's common on this site. Don't take it personally, and don't let it get to you.

Stay strong; stay the course. Be confident and happy.

I followed that step-by-step deevorce process. Worked like a charm. Cost me a grand total of $67. It was a friendly divorce because she wanted me gone so she could buy a house and not have my name attached to it - she could have done that anyway but who am I to tell?

Living with her was some of the hardest 13 years of my life. Abuse (Yes I was a pussy), financial hardships, jail time, step-father-who-could-do-nothing-right, etc. Good riddance.

Ok, how who do I pay for this counseling session?