Add all the weird ones we've all seen- I'll start it off with the snakes:

CROSSMAN ","SYLVIA ","M","067"," 2621","CHILDS ","LN","ALEXANDRIA ","VA","12/05/2003","HANDLING SNAKES TO ENDANGER OTHERS

here are some:
NOISE ORDINANCE VIOL WHISTLE
IMPEDE TRAFFIC FLOW DRIVE TO SLOW
TIRES WORN/BALD
ADULTERATION OF FOOD W/INT TO HARM
LOUD PARTY
TOO MANY IN FRONT SEAT
FAIL REMOVE ANIMAL EXCREMENT
BREAK IN FUNERAL PROCESION

I'm still partial to:

RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS

Wtf is that?

I remember seeing a charge of OTHER/MISCELLANEOUS or something to that effect. I wonder what you'd have to do to get that...

baffled!!?? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wtf is that?


RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS

I imagine it means habitually letting your dogs roam free w/o a leash, fencing, and/or your presence. Still sounds funny when you read it.

I always thought the combination charge of Drunk In Public/Public Swearing didn't make any sense. What if you weren't drunk and were just swearing in public? Doesn't seem fair to me...though I'm sure alot of people getting DIP's probably end up cursing while being arrested!



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 04/01/2009 06:45AM by inkahootz.

Eastsider Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm still partial to:
>
> RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS

baffled!!?? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wtf is that?

RUNNING AT LARGE: DOGS

see how one punctuation mark makes all the difference?

now, when all you dumbass posters are baffled as to why we cant understand your inane posts, there is a good chance that it is lacking proper punctuation, paragraph breaks or has other syntactic errors.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/01/2009 08:01AM by Gravis.

OK, Gravis...search the database and show me the colon. (There is none.)

We've discussed the offense before...of course it is "Running at Large, Dogs", but the FCPD registers the offense w/o punctuation, which is why it is funny.

Anyone else want the funnay explained out of a joke?

"FLORES ","VERONICA ","C","025"," 7820","ATTLEBORO ","DR","SPRINGFIELD ","VA","11/02/2002","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "
"FORD ","DARBY ","C","046"," 1752","CREEK CROSSING ","RD","VIENNA ","VA","03/25/2005","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "
"FRANCHET ","CHRISTINIA ","H","038"," 752","VAN BUREN ","ST","HERNDON ","VA","03/11/2006","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "
"FRANKLIN ","ANDREW ","D","029"," 12507","NORTHLAKE ","CT","FAIRFAX ","VA","11/01/2005","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "
"FRANKLIN ","ANDREW ","D","029"," 12507","NORTHLAKE ","CT","FAIRFAX ","VA","11/01/2005","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "
"FRAZIER ","KATHLEEN ","M","042"," 14616","LOCK ","DR","CENTREVILLE ","VA","04/12/2006","RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS "

Eastsider Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> OK, Gravis...search the database and show me the
> colon. (There is none.)
>
> We've discussed the offense before...of course it
> is "Running at Large, Dogs", but the FCPD
> registers the offense w/o punctuation, which is
> why it is funny.

you got me all wrong. i know there isnt a colon, i wasnt referring to you in my post and i do think it's a funny name for the charge. besides, you arent even an anonymous poster nor did you make a long pointless post which are key elements to such a poorly written posts.

edit by Cary: minor HTML trickery removed


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 09/20/2010 10:18AM by Cary.

"UNAUTH USE- ANIMAL" sorta makes you wonder what the hell was going on.

This one makes me laugh. Evidently you don't need dogs for the charge.

"JOHNSON ","BARBARA ","J","056"," 8414","GOLDEN ASPEN ","CT","SPRINGFIELD ","VA","12/19/2007","RUNNING AT LARGE

My bad.

Gravis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Eastsider Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > OK, Gravis...search the database and show me
> the
> > colon. (There is none.)
> >
> > We've discussed the offense before...of course
> it
> > is "Running at Large, Dogs", but the FCPD
> > registers the offense w/o punctuation, which is
> > why it is funny.
>
> you got me all wrong. i know there isnt a colon, i
> wasnt referring to you in my post and i do think
> it's a funny name for the charge. besides, you
> arent even an anonymous poster nor did you make a
> long pointless post which are key elements to such
> a poorly written posts.

"DASHTARA ","KEYA "," ","025"," 10513","WILLIAM TERRY ","DR","VIENNA ","VA","12/31/2005","CAPIAS OTHER JURISDICTION "

"BROWN ","SEAN "," ","025"," 10513","BRADDOCK ","DR","FAIRFAX ","VA","12/31/2006","DRIVE WHL BLACK "

"ANTA WIJETUNGA ","SUNETH ","D","033"," 6864","KERRY WOOD ","CI","CENTREVILLE ","VA","01/01/2007","EXT OF LIC FOR MILITARY

What could this mean?

+1 is that really it?

"CATS","GRAVIS"," ","057","9200","ZERO","WING","FAIRFAX","VA","12/27/2007","ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US"

I don't think any of them will beat the "SNAKES" one but here's some random ones I dug up....

"ILLEGAL SALE OF UNAPPROVED EQUIPME "

"DESTRUCTION-FUEL STORAGE "

"DESTROY OR DEFACE MONUMENTS "

"EXPL DESTROY DWLLLG DAY "

"PT LARC-ANIMAL&POULTRY "

"RABID ANIMAL WITHOLD INFO ABOUT "

"DRIVING OVER FIRE HOSE "

"TRANSPORT LIQUOR FOR HIRE VEHICLE "

"FAILURE TO LEAVE SCH GRDS A/NOTICE "

"TAMPERING CABLE TV SERVICE "

""PT LARC-ANIMAL&POULTRY ""

Good One! Haha-

"UNSAFE AIR COND UNIT"
"COASTING PROHIBITED"
"AFFIXED SEAT FOR DRIVER"
"WITHHOLDING FUNDS FROM SALES"
"UNLAWFUL NAME CHANGE"
"HAZING OF STUDENTS TO CAUSE HARM"

Every single one of these is a reason I'd love to be a cop -- the anecdotes..

"So I pulled over this guy who was coasting down the street while his air conditioner was on fire, and it turned out that not only was his seat nothing more than a milk crate, but he'd also changed his name with nothing more than white-out and hope!"

"RABID ANIMAL WITHOLD INFO ABOUT"
- Sir, could you tell me when you last saw that rabid raccoon?
- No? You are under arrest.

RUNNING AT LARGE DOGS

So if you run away from large dogs it's not a crime?

Hey guys... funny thread. I am actually in the database for one of the odd ones you all mentioned:

"ILLEGAL SALE OF UNAPPROVED EQUIPME "

One of my friends found it and called me immediately asking, WTF Dude? At first I had no idea then I realized what it was for.

I had been pulled over a while back because I replaced the light bulbs on my car's front running lights (decorative -- not required lights that are below the headlights -- fake fog lights if you will) and instead of using incandescent bulbs I replaced them with LED bulbs because I thought the LED's would last longer.

Apparently I was wrong and the LED's over time also failed but I noticed that they would go out for a few days, then start working again later. One day I noticed one of them was actually flickering.

The night I got pulled over it turns out (unknown to me) both of them had started flickering, and a police offer I drove by saw them and pulled me over.

They thought I was trying to impersonate a police officer with "strobes" even though the lights are really dim and the blinking pattern was not that fast and more random. After I explained to them the situation they were pretty cool about it and he issued me a "fix it ticket".

I got it fixed a few days later and went to the police HQ to show him that they were fixed and he threw the ticket out.

Sooooo.... 1. just because you are on the database doesn't mean you are actually convicted (which seems kinda messed up if you ask me)

2. The police code descriptions are "best fit effort" I guess. I think that "ILLEGAL SALE OF UNAPPROVED EQUIPME " sounds much worse than what it should have really been "USE OF UNAPPROVED EQUIPMENT ON VEHICLE"

il Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> here are some:
> NOISE ORDINANCE VIOL WHISTLE
> IMPEDE TRAFFIC FLOW DRIVE TO SLOW
> TIRES WORN/BALD
> ADULTERATION OF FOOD W/INT TO HARM
> LOUD PARTY
> TOO MANY IN FRONT SEAT
> FAIL REMOVE ANIMAL EXCREMENT
> BREAK IN FUNERAL PROCESION

What do they mean by the word whistle? Does that mean someone blew a whistle all night to annoy people? Or perhaps they whistled a really annoying song into the wee hours?

LuLu Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> il Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > here are some:
> > NOISE ORDINANCE VIOL WHISTLE
> > IMPEDE TRAFFIC FLOW DRIVE TO SLOW
> > TIRES WORN/BALD
> > ADULTERATION OF FOOD W/INT TO HARM
> > LOUD PARTY
> > TOO MANY IN FRONT SEAT
> > FAIL REMOVE ANIMAL EXCREMENT
> > BREAK IN FUNERAL PROCESION
>
> What do they mean by the word whistle? Does that
> mean someone blew a whistle all night to annoy
> people? Or perhaps they whistled a really annoying
> song into the wee hours?



They mean like whistle tips. like bub rubb and lil sis ye dig?
kool .

I found out its illegal to coast. AS in, stick the transmission in nuetral or hold in the clutch. And drive.

How do they know you are doing it?

KeepOnTruckin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I found out its illegal to coast. AS in, stick the
> transmission in nuetral or hold in the clutch. And
> drive.
>
> How do they know you are doing it?


I've always wondered that too. How could they possibly know? Maybe people are dumb enough to tell the cop they were coasting?


Unrelated comment: There are definitely weird word usages in the law...how about "uttering" which is writing bad checks or something. I thought uttering was to talk. What if you remain silent while writing a bad check...are you still uttering?

"ESMAEILIAN ","VAHID "," ","026"," 1309","CELVIN FOREST ","DR","VIENNA ","VA","05/23/2008","DRUGS/ALC SCREENING TEST DIST URINE"

Only one in the database...seems like there would be a lot more of this.







Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/20/2010 02:54PM by Prada Denim.

tubby Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> KeepOnTruckin Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I found out its illegal to coast. AS in, stick
> the
> > transmission in nuetral or hold in the clutch.
> And
> > drive.
> >
> > How do they know you are doing it?
>
>
> I've always wondered that too. How could they
> possibly know? Maybe people are dumb enough to
> tell the cop they were coasting?
>
>
> Unrelated comment: There are definitely weird word
> usages in the law...how about "uttering" which is
> writing bad checks or something. I thought
> uttering was to talk. What if you remain silent
> while writing a bad check...are you still
> uttering?

If you pay attention it's actually pretty obvious, but I suspect they'll only pull you over if you're doing something else stupid too.