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Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Jose Batista
()
Date: May 28, 2011 10:15AM
Saw a short, 15 sec. ad on tv yesterday for koons.com and had some dorky guy in it and not the beauteous crystal. what gives?
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
kbudz
()
Date: May 28, 2011 10:34AM
that chick's eyes scare me.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Kert
()
Date: June 17, 2011 06:06AM
She looks like Cindy mccain's little sister! Both of their eyes look weird. But Cindy mccain resembles the crypt keeper!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Did you get your Wow Price?
()
Date: June 17, 2011 06:22AM
Nah, she's cool.
Attachments:
Attachments:
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
ProVallone
()
Date: June 17, 2011 07:53AM
If I never see that bug eyed, anorexic freak again, it'll be too soon.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
NiggaPlz
()
Date: June 17, 2011 12:59PM
Everything about that bitch scares me...
kbudz Wrote:
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> that chick's eyes scare me.
kbudz Wrote:
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> that chick's eyes scare me.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
justsayin
()
Date: June 17, 2011 01:21PM
Thank goodness Fairfax Underground finally has a thread on Krystal Koons. Bravo to you, brave poster, for finally giving us a way to talk about this.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Krystal Koons
()
Date: June 17, 2011 02:58PM
I don't understand why all of you are poking fun at me. Didn't you get a "Wow Price" on one of our finely made cars?
Why would anyone ever be scared of lil ole me?
Attachments:
Why would anyone ever be scared of lil ole me?
Attachments:
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Mofo
()
Date: June 17, 2011 03:26PM
The manassas one is now specifically called Joyce Koons and no longer Crystal.
www.grabthewheel.com
www.grabthewheel.com
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
JBass
()
Date: June 17, 2011 03:54PM
She looks like she has an 8Ball a day blow habit.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Krystal Koons
()
Date: June 17, 2011 03:58PM
Mofo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The manassas one is now specifically called Joyce
> Koons and no longer Crystal.
>
> www.grabthewheel.com
That's right, we have family members running all our dealerships in the area. It's a family business. You can read all about it in my blog at http://krystalkoons.wordpress.com/
-------------------------------------------------------
> The manassas one is now specifically called Joyce
> Koons and no longer Crystal.
>
> www.grabthewheel.com
That's right, we have family members running all our dealerships in the area. It's a family business. You can read all about it in my blog at http://krystalkoons.wordpress.com/
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Frank
()
Date: July 25, 2011 11:43AM
You guys are nuts, Id hit that till the sun came up.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Taylor
()
Date: July 25, 2011 12:10PM
I agree. I think she's pretty hot in that picture.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Johnny Walker
()
Date: July 25, 2011 12:22PM
I bought a car from Koons and the price did indeed "wow" me so I'm kool with Krystal.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
da troof
()
Date: July 25, 2011 12:29PM
I think she is a real turnoff. Although ads would be less effective in her absence. Whose attention isn't grabbed by an anorexic, bug-eyed woman mugging into a fisheye lens?
Anyway, Koonz has a pretty bad reputation according to these reports but what do you expect from an auto dealership:
http://www.ripoffreport.com/Search/koons.aspx
Anyway, Koonz has a pretty bad reputation according to these reports but what do you expect from an auto dealership:
http://www.ripoffreport.com/Search/koons.aspx
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
496
()
Date: July 25, 2011 12:49PM
I'd fuck her until she needed an oil change.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Kenneth the poet
()
Date: July 25, 2011 08:57PM
I'd fuck her until there was no life left in her, and we are dripping with sweat, laying in human size wet spots
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Sympathetic supporter
()
Date: July 25, 2011 10:53PM
As a woman whose sister was anorexic for many years, I have a lot of concern for this young woman when I see TV and print ads of her because she looks gravely underweight--anorexic.
I hope people close to her are able to help her get the help she appears to need. Anorexia is a complex and tragic disease; it often strikes young women who are perfectionists and unfortunately, their distorted body images make it very difficult for them to see they have a problem and seek treatment.
I hope people close to her are able to help her get the help she appears to need. Anorexia is a complex and tragic disease; it often strikes young women who are perfectionists and unfortunately, their distorted body images make it very difficult for them to see they have a problem and seek treatment.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
zeebeekoolio
()
Date: July 26, 2011 11:26AM
@Sympathetic supporter
Yes. I recall one commercial where she lifts her arms and they literally look like two sticks. It was chilling to behold.
Yes. I recall one commercial where she lifts her arms and they literally look like two sticks. It was chilling to behold.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
women need not apply
()
Date: July 27, 2011 08:32AM
496 Wrote:
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> I'd fuck her until she needed an oil change.
We all know you fuck men!
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> I'd fuck her until she needed an oil change.
We all know you fuck men!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Koons
()
Date: July 28, 2011 12:48AM
I saw her at public house recently.... She looks pretty good. I just hate her face because of the commercial wehere she has that repeater voice changer and to make it worse the commercial plays twice back to back. The third time i heard this commercial i vowed to never buy anything from there ill go to kip killman because they dont have commercials that make me want to kill myself!
Be nice People
Posted by:
KKFan
()
Date: August 17, 2011 06:56PM
All you losers posting from your parents basements about how Ms. Koons looks need to post your own owerweight, zit encrusted faces. She has beautiful eyes, nice long hair and a pretty smile. The only problem I have with her is that commercial where she had that little football team with Eagles Logo on their helmets. Boo Eagles. Boo Giants. Fuck Dallas.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
postpoppunk
()
Date: August 17, 2011 08:26PM
Sooooo.......who the fuck is her Uncle and why did she call?
Details bitches'!!!
Details bitches'!!!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Steven121
()
Date: February 14, 2013 12:05AM
Funny story. Krystal is nothing but a coke head whore. She lives in her fancy Annapolis penthouse apartment, overlooking the Target because she thinks she rules the city.
Funny fact that no one knows, she had an affair with a salesmen at Koons. This salesmen, was married with multiple children.
She now has botox, and breast jobs, and multiple plastic surgery, while they live in this glamourus apartment. He no longer works, lives on Krystal and daddys millions, and hasnt paid child support or anything in years. He is a deadbeat dad that Krystal condones.
Fuck that bigeyed bitch!
Funny fact that no one knows, she had an affair with a salesmen at Koons. This salesmen, was married with multiple children.
She now has botox, and breast jobs, and multiple plastic surgery, while they live in this glamourus apartment. He no longer works, lives on Krystal and daddys millions, and hasnt paid child support or anything in years. He is a deadbeat dad that Krystal condones.
Fuck that bigeyed bitch!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Tony B
()
Date: November 07, 2014 08:52PM
Whether she been involved in a private affair is no business to anyone other than those involved. I have had the pleasure over the years to see this lady involved in many worthwhile charitable events. The donations given by her company have been amazing and she is and has been a dedicated professional. It is quite sick that trolls post this rubbish and HIDE. You call her names but it you that is the coward.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Trolls!
()
Date: November 07, 2014 09:18PM
Tony B Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Whether she been involved in a private affair is
> no business to anyone other than those involved. I
> have had the pleasure over the years to see this
> lady involved in many worthwhile charitable
> events. The donations given by her company have
> been amazing and she is and has been a dedicated
> professional. It is quite sick that trolls post
> this rubbish and HIDE. You call her names but it
> you that is the coward.
I have big news. Tony B. has uncovered trolls that hide on FFXU. And he has the hots for Krazy Eyes Krystal!
-------------------------------------------------------
> Whether she been involved in a private affair is
> no business to anyone other than those involved. I
> have had the pleasure over the years to see this
> lady involved in many worthwhile charitable
> events. The donations given by her company have
> been amazing and she is and has been a dedicated
> professional. It is quite sick that trolls post
> this rubbish and HIDE. You call her names but it
> you that is the coward.
I have big news. Tony B. has uncovered trolls that hide on FFXU. And he has the hots for Krazy Eyes Krystal!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
i heard that
()
Date: November 07, 2014 10:31PM
Is it true Crystal changed her last Name to METH?
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Billy Whack
()
Date: November 07, 2014 11:18PM
Thats one janky ass looking pipehead!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
NippleChuck
()
Date: November 08, 2014 06:10AM
Would NOT hit. Would buy trucks from though. Have bought 3 from Koons 2 I still have and have always been treated me fairly.
Would buy from again.
Nip
Would buy from again.
Nip
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
UV7kH
()
Date: November 08, 2014 10:21PM
is that crystal in the middle?
get your butt out of the way girl i'm trying to see the hood ornament
get your butt out of the way girl i'm trying to see the hood ornament
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
mWkCU
()
Date: November 08, 2014 10:21PM
.
Attachments:
Attachments:
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
hjb49
()
Date: November 08, 2014 11:43PM
Jose Batista Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Saw a short, 15 sec. ad on tv yesterday for
> koons.com and had some dorky guy in it and not the
> beauteous crystal. what gives?
no i've had that dissapointment before, fearing not to see wonder koons spirit again
she'll be back
Attachments:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Saw a short, 15 sec. ad on tv yesterday for
> koons.com and had some dorky guy in it and not the
> beauteous crystal. what gives?
no i've had that dissapointment before, fearing not to see wonder koons spirit again
she'll be back
Attachments:
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
JT
()
Date: March 31, 2017 09:04AM
Wow, some of you are so petty. Maybe put that energy into improving YOURSELF. (It takes a little more work, but it's a bigger payoff).
What would your wife say if she saw what you wrote? Oh, you don't have a wife? How about your mother?
I recently met Crystal Koons, and she was a genuinely friendly and kind person.
What would your wife say if she saw what you wrote? Oh, you don't have a wife? How about your mother?
I recently met Crystal Koons, and she was a genuinely friendly and kind person.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Skank Hunt 43
()
Date: March 31, 2017 09:20AM
JT Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wow, some of you are so petty. Maybe put that
> energy into improving YOURSELF. (It takes a little
> more work, but it's a bigger payoff).
> What would your wife say if she saw what you
> wrote? Oh, you don't have a wife? How about your
> mother?
> I recently met Crystal Koons, and she was a
> genuinely friendly and kind person.
I've met her too and I soooooo want to sleep her. She's is smoking hot!!!!
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wow, some of you are so petty. Maybe put that
> energy into improving YOURSELF. (It takes a little
> more work, but it's a bigger payoff).
> What would your wife say if she saw what you
> wrote? Oh, you don't have a wife? How about your
> mother?
> I recently met Crystal Koons, and she was a
> genuinely friendly and kind person.
I've met her too and I soooooo want to sleep her. She's is smoking hot!!!!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
I would rail her silly
()
Date: March 31, 2017 09:38AM
It would probably be like beating off, but a tighter fit around my cock!
She's so skinny that her asshole probably looks like the tied end of a balloon, with skin hanging out of the knot!
She's so skinny that her asshole probably looks like the tied end of a balloon, with skin hanging out of the knot!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
dafuq
()
Date: March 31, 2017 10:19AM
I would rail her silly Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> her asshole probably looks
> like the tied end of a balloon, with skin hanging
> out of the knot!
Attachments:
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> her asshole probably looks
> like the tied end of a balloon, with skin hanging
> out of the knot!
Attachments:
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
giddyup
()
Date: March 31, 2017 07:51PM
Her voice is dubbed in the commercials. The same voice actor does the Cricket cell phone ads.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Krystal Koons lover
()
Date: July 26, 2017 08:50PM
You're talking about the woman I love!
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
Let the Lady Be
()
Date: July 26, 2017 09:01PM
giddyup Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Her voice is dubbed in the commercials. The same
> voice actor does the Cricket cell phone ads.
She had a stroke, dumbass.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Her voice is dubbed in the commercials. The same
> voice actor does the Cricket cell phone ads.
She had a stroke, dumbass.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
yucky
()
Date: July 27, 2017 02:16PM
In the last commercial she appeared in she looked awful. Drug problem perhaps?
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
d9k7e
()
Date: July 27, 2017 05:24PM
yucky Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> In the last commercial she appeared in she looked
> awful. Drug problem perhaps?
I think she was on a commercial this or last month.
-------------------------------------------------------
> In the last commercial she appeared in she looked
> awful. Drug problem perhaps?
I think she was on a commercial this or last month.
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
d9k7e
()
Date: July 27, 2017 05:26PM
I don't remember awful - pretty but saleslady like, but it wasn't a Wow commercial it was toned down (like a salesperson, you dod expect them to run around saying Wow when your shopping!)
Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
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()
Date: April 02, 2023 03:28PM
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Re: Crystal Koons calls uncle?
Posted by:
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()
Date: April 02, 2023 04:16PM
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