I recently moved to a new apartment and have noticed large roaming packs of wild bastard children (you know, welfare babies) lurking around my building/parking lot. What kinds of things can I do to disperse these kids from my stairwell/patio without spending the rest of my life in prison?

Don't they have those sonic or sub-sonic noise makers designed so that only kids can hear them? Weren't they using them in the UK or something? :)

If you can’t model the past, where you know the answer pretty well, how can you model the future? - William Happer Cyrus Fogg Brackett Professor of Physics Princeton University



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/24/2010 01:30PM by Registered Voter.

Ah yeah, here we go...

Brits Disperse Teens with Ultra-sonic “Mosquito” Device
http://www.infowars.com/brits-disperse-teens-with-ultra-sonic-mosquito-device/

Quote

A gadget that disperses teenage gangs with high-pitched noise should be banned, according to human rights campaigners.

The Mosquito exploits young people’s ability to hear very high frequencies, a power which declines once they reach their 20s.

An estimated 3,500 devices are in use in England to deter children from loitering in areas like parks, shopping centres and around shops.
...

lol

If you can’t model the past, where you know the answer pretty well, how can you model the future? - William Happer Cyrus Fogg Brackett Professor of Physics Princeton University

I forgot about those! Looking into it as we speak.

This product is perfect for me as it upsets human rights activists

Here you go - they have one that plays music now.

http://www.compoundsecurity.co.uk/css-music-player-anti-loitering-system


They sell the Mosquito MK IV now...
http://www.compoundsecurity.co.uk/mosquito-mk4-multi-age
If you can’t model the past, where you know the answer pretty well, how can you model the future? - William Happer Cyrus Fogg Brackett Professor of Physics Princeton University



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/24/2010 01:39PM by Registered Voter.

Spray them with this:
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Do they look like this?



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Gonads & Strife Wrote:
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> I recently moved to a new apartment and have
> noticed large roaming packs of wild bastard
> children (you know, welfare babies) lurking around
> my building/parking lot. What kinds of things can
> I do to disperse these kids from my
> stairwell/patio without spending the rest of my
> life in prison?



Tell your neighbors you work for immigration enforcement. Guarantee you the parents will keep Julio and the rat pack away from your door.

Try spritzing your "no-go" areas with fox and/or wolf urine.

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13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

MrMephisto Wrote:
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> Try spritzing your "no-go" areas with fox and/or
> wolf urine.


I like where your head is at...

Open your windows, put your speakers up next to them, and play some Meade Skelton as loud as you can.

Oh wait, you should only do that if you want the entire neighborhood to leave....

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That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

Warhawk Wrote:
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> Open your windows, put your speakers up next to
> them, and play some Meade Skelton as loud as you
> can.



Or you could get a life size cut out of Meade. That would probably work even better.
I think this pose would get rid of any child in a five mile radius.


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I'm not trying to invite fire bombings, Warhawk..

pour a line of iodized salt across the threshold of your door. it worked for me.

no, go with the fox/wolf pee.

I lived at a complex that had a chainlink fence that was always being climbed over. I didn't blame the kids so much, but when I'd see an adult male with a napsack scaling it, just seemed bad.

I got a little tub of bearing lubricant and a brush and slathered the top rail down really well. Never heard about it myself, but one neighbor who used to be home all the time said he heard some profanity on several occasions after the fence climbers realized what they had gotten into.


If the little shits are on your patio, just ask them nicely, make a little crack about something unrelated. You're in a semi-hostage situation because you can't be home to protect your shit all the time, and if you yell or threaten, what kind of kid wouldn't remember?

Registered Voter Wrote:
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> Don't they have those sonic or sub-sonic noise
> makers designed so that only kids can hear them?
> Weren't they using them in the UK or something? :)


I can still hear those things even though I'm not a kid. My friend sent me the sound sample on the computer, and I had to throw my headphones off it was so damn piercing. I always thought I had sensitive hearing...

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"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

This is what I'm thinking about getting:




I currently have this:







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"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

HAHAHAHA.

JRT's, a force to be reckoned with.

Do the idiots on FFXU feel better now?

Registered Voter...a Big talking coward..big man on FFXU...little man in life.

Vince(1) Wrote:
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> Do the idiots on FFXU feel better now?
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The majority of people on wlefare are white, single mothers.

Thats def. not Julio, more like a Tracy. nice one

Oh yeah like I'm going to believe that. Everybody knows that 60% of all statistics are made up on the spot.

MrMephisto Wrote:
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> Try spritzing your "no-go" areas with fox and/or
> wolf urine.

Skunk musk works too. I have the same problem with kids playing on my
steps (townhouse) and staring in the windows and pecking on them to try
and get my dog to bark. I've told them four times now to stop and the
last time I said I'd talk their parents if they didn't. Also told them
if their parents (who are never supervising them although they're six
and under) didn't stop it, I'd turn it over to the HOA. If I have to go
that far I'll turn the matter over to the child welfare folks as I
see it as parental neglect.