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Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Lately, I’ve been eating a lots of pickled vegetables such as sauerkraut, beets, cabbage, and peppers. The fiber in the vegetables and the chemical effects of the vinegar seem to work like a colonic powerflush. The morning routine of a big pot of black coffee just adds to the joyful daily elimination routine.
Combine the above with the near-total avoidance of junk and fast food and I’ve achieved results that would make Mr. Brown Onion happy.
I’m grossly obese and in denial.
I wouldn’t fuck myself.
I cut out carbs and I lose 16lbs in 3.5 weeks.
Solid 220 now, too abs showing.
Now, I’m eating 2-3 lbs of $1.29/lb pork from Costco.
Real ghetto shit but high in fat.
*you know you’re in ketosis when you get constipated*
Anyways, TL;DR
Tried to be slick and just thawed out Lima beans and didn’t cook them.
Halfway thru the two pound bag, my brain kept warning me to stop eating it. The Lima beans were like plastic pellets from a bean bag chair!
Next day I shit so much I couldn’t see the water in the toilet. I gave birth to a Hawaii.
Massive Evacuation Wrote:
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> Lately, I’ve been eating a lots of pickled
> vegetables such as sauerkraut, beets, cabbage, and
> peppers. The fiber in the vegetables and the
> chemical effects of the vinegar seem to work like
> a colonic powerflush. The morning routine of a
> big pot of black coffee just adds to the joyful
> daily elimination routine.
>
> Combine the above with the near-total avoidance of
> junk and fast food and I’ve achieved results
> that would make Mr. Brown Onion happy.
Definitely routine for a #4, although sometimes trending to a #3.
I feel good. Proper diet has made all the difference.
Brown Onion Wrote:
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> Massive Evacuation Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Lately, I’ve been eating a lots of pickled
> > vegetables such as sauerkraut, beets, cabbage,
> and
> > peppers. The fiber in the vegetables and the
> > chemical effects of the vinegar seem to work
> like
> > a colonic powerflush. The morning routine of a
> > big pot of black coffee just adds to the joyful
> > daily elimination routine.
> >
> > Combine the above with the near-total avoidance
> of
> > junk and fast food and I’ve achieved results
> > that would make Mr. Brown Onion happy.
>
>
> What bristol stool guide number?
Oh my , another data point here. BK Whoppers, back when I used to eat them, caused the most hideous spectacles in the Thunder Room.
Avoid at all costs.
LetsRock Wrote:
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> +44 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Can be single item foods, fast food
> restaurants,
> > etc..
> >
> > Go...
>
>
> Burger King Whopper and onion rings. Six hours
> later and I explode. A hour or so before and my
> farts are nasty.
anything from Taco Bell. it gives you the ripest aisle clearing farts, too. if you want some toilet bowl cracking farts, you have to try Subway--almost anything with double meat except tuna. get extra L&T, too, not as much crapping as Taco Bell and the farts aren't as ripe, but they are louder and the smell does travel farther.
Georgetown Power Plant pls Wrote:
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> please shut this thread down with power plant pics
> before Brown Onion spooges all over his shitty
> dell monitor.
Shut up Gerry and copulate with your goat. All of these are non bowel friendly bunker busters
Try Yuengling's Black and Tan. It does something to your gut bacteria after drinking it a few times that produces farts that kill.
For uncontrollable bowels, eat a bunch of any keto/Atkins sweets that contain maltitol. I had a bag of Russell Stover jellybeans once and couldn't sleep at all that night for fear of shitting the bed.
NPGLJ Wrote:
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> Try Yuengling's Black and Tan. It does something
> to your gut bacteria after drinking it a few times
> that produces farts that kill.
>
> For uncontrollable bowels, eat a bunch of any
> keto/Atkins sweets that contain maltitol. I had a
> bag of Russell Stover jellybeans once and couldn't
> sleep at all that night for fear of shitting the
> bed.
Terrible idea as that's akin to playing with fire. Just awful for the forty feet of plumbing, the starfish and the groan throne.
Military grade bacon and plenty of cabbage kimchee!
Fermented black bean and chicken only cooked to 100degrees internal temperature!
Steamed kale I got from dumpster diving behind an Aldi