I was running late for work today and broke the sound barrier in a 1 mph zone. I guess the sonic boom caught a cop's attention and the bastard pulled me over. Just as he got to my window though, Satan appeared in my passenger seat and said he could get me out of the ticket in exchange for my soul. I took the deal and the cop disappeared into a cloud of a thousand little demons.

What I want to know is, do I actually have to go to hell or is Satan flexible? Anybody have any experience with this sort of thing?

You're fine, dude. Party it up like none other. Continue to speed, use drugs, smack women around, don't pay your taxes, tell everyone exactly what you think without sugarcoating anything, and howl at the moon. You've got Satan on your side now, so you're good to go.

Thats nothing just the other day I traveled the speed of light through an elementary school hallway. When I burst through the front door of the school a cop saw the brilliant flash of light and called in for helicopter to chase me. Soon I was on the news with half of the fairfax county police department chasing me down the beltway. When I was finally pulled over I didn't need to sell my soul to the devil becuase I became the devil and bursted into a cloud of flames and disaperred into the bowels of hell. Do you think there is a way for me to escape from hell or am I pretty much stuck here?

Interesting assholes-

Nine and a half years and no one but you was interested. You have major issues to deal with.

Can you play a fiddle? I understand the devil is good, but beatable.

Is his name Johnny?

devil came down from GA

Satan is likely not very flexible

Surprised someone from the 757 was intelligent enough to get out, even for a day.

run the mountain run boy run