Carla: Yep, still drop in here occasionally. Been busy working on our upcoming move from Walmart, Florida (ha ha to whomever called it that).
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Cary: I'm not leaving this thread, especially since I piss off some of you. Ask my husband (sigh), I am very able and willing to continue to do things that I know bother certain people. For example, I don't even like to nap. Carla may have punted, but I ain't going anywhere. Kindred spirits here.
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Cary: A friend has alerted me that I was discussed on the little show this week. Is that why Mike left me a voice mail yesterday? Must I really engage my husband (sigh) with this? No mystery why I don't like Mike. He's a insecure bullying alcoholic serving as a host to my barnacle husband, leading RWSJr to being more than satisfied to be a "sidekick" (insult to actual sidekicks) in a low-paying
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Cary: My husband (sigh) nailed it yesterday when asked why I don't listen to the show or come to TMOS events: "After all these years, she is so sick of Comedy Robb, and Robb that tries to be funny. She hates that. She's heard all the jokes, she's heard all the voices. She hates the puns... She doesn't like me." Dear, well put. Accurate. Spot on. Couldn't have said it better. My most enjoyab
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Cary: Oh, what a day. Those darn kids just make a study hall monitor's job so hard. Anyway, settling in to listen to my favorite podcast, Rob and Joe, and checking in here. I think I can shed light on my husband's weight discrepancy -- last year for his base line he weighed himself fully dressed (including Birkies and his largest and heaviest hoodie, of course). After his recent bout of the flu,
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Carla: As the Oscars are on, I am reminded I thought I could turn Mike into sort of a Casey Affleck by making him go vegan. (Meanwhile, he is still pretending to know nothing about our oh so mysteriously disappearing peanut butter cups).
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Torn Pentacle Wrote: ------------------------------------------------------- > Jarla sounds like a delight. Carla: Why thank you, thank you very much. But it's Carla.
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Carla: That was not a fitbit -- I tell Mike it is, but it's really a febreze auto vent clip.
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Cary: My husband could not tell you what year I graduated from high school if you put a gun to his head, but can immediately tell you that Katie graduated in 1989.
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Carla: Mike has had to do make-ups for Blue Apron. They were not pleased with his (mis)reading of their spots of late. They're not the first sponsor to complain. Oscar is not happy.
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Cary and Carla: Thank you!
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Cary: I have it on very good authority that scrolling guy spends more time and mental energy doing that than my husband does on show prep.
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Carla: I am encouraging Mike to resolve to look for common ground with those on the other side of the political spectrum. To get him started, I noted that he and Trump both love golf and have two daughters. (I kept these to myself: And they would eat only fast food if they could. And are on their third marriages, with wives who are two decades years younger. And have problems with barbers. And d
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Carla: What were the odds I married the oldest middle-aged man in the world? Mon tried to warn me, but I thought I could keep him young by giving him a baby. Big fail. Now I am taking meat from him. He doesn't know that with Google location service, I can track when he pops into Culvers drive-through when out on errands. Am holding that info for the right moment.
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Carla: Mike can't understand why his latest voice over audition resulted in crickets from the potential client. He says he killed it with his Johnny Mathis impression. Now thinks he should have gone with Lou Rawls instead.
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Cary: Robb's error goes way back. On our honeymoon in Paris, after I sent him out to get tampons, he told me it jogged his memory of regaling his female high school French classmates with jokes about erasing their monthlies. By the way, at least Oscar has the balls to give me an answer when I have to ask him when my husband is getting his next paycheck...
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Carla: My husband is now an anchor. Not in the way he usually is.
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Cary: Ever wonder why I work so hard to support my husband and kids? Because Robb won't. There is a larger question here but honestly, I can't face it. Oh shit, I said, "face." Guess whose warbling voice I hear in my head repeating it whenever I use that word, even when I'm not around him? And he wonders why I avoid him and my in-laws on holidays. I'll even get a part-time retail job as a conve
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Cary: Robb gave me photo of what he wants for Christmas. We will have to take his word it's Elvis.
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Cary: Now that I'm not dog-sitting as much, Robb is confident there will be less dog hair in his fruitcakes this year.
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Carla: Big time post-New Orleans depression for Mike. I recommend no more live shows -- never good for him to set eyes on his fans.
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Cary: My daughter confided in me that she was the one responsible for defacing her dad's car at the football game Friday night.
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Carla: I am so bummed our son clearly has his father's emotional makeup. My mom says nature clearly beat the shit out of nurture, as my sole mission has been to not raise a Full Mike 2.0. Oh, well.
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Carla: My husband is drinking his way up the East Coast. Therefore, I am too.
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Carla: Solved my travel problem -- two cars. Stuck him with the dogs. Genius move if I do say so myself.
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Carla: Back up 95. With Mike, to make it worse. I'm dosing him and Jr. with Benadryl. FML.
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Cary: Remind me why I took this godforsaken job again? Can't have been for the medical bennies to keep my husband alive. I get out of bed at an ungodly hour just to see that huge lump snoring away, my personal human Hindenburg... I begin crying in the car on the way to work now.
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Carla: I'm so glad we (Mike failed, so we had to get involved) spent 2 days trying in vain to fix a screen door just before we head back to our Walmart FL home.
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Cary: You couldn't pay me enough to spend that commute and show time with Robb each week.
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Cary: Replacing the adjectives and adverbs in his FB post with their opposite will give you a nearly perfect description of the way I feel about my husband.
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