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Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
First Timers
Posted by:
Warhawk
()
Date: June 11, 2012 05:44PM
The "Food I'd Never Eat" thread and its emphasis on crabs made me think of something that my kids and I have pondered.
Have you ever thought about who might have been the first person to see an animal crawl out of the ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to fucking eat that. And then who figured out that it should be cooked first?
__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.
Have you ever thought about who might have been the first person to see an animal crawl out of the ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to fucking eat that. And then who figured out that it should be cooked first?
__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
hillbilly dude
()
Date: June 11, 2012 05:56PM
Worse yet who thought to drink cows milk?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Numbers
()
Date: June 11, 2012 06:00PM
hillbilly dude Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Worse yet who thought to drink cows milk?
Someone really thirsty that was tired of drinking urine.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Worse yet who thought to drink cows milk?
Someone really thirsty that was tired of drinking urine.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
WingNut
()
Date: June 11, 2012 06:05PM
I think that any carnivorous moves in those days were probably innate.
Cracking open a lobster claw was always something I wondered about.
Cracking open a lobster claw was always something I wondered about.
idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam
Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.
Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Harry Tuttle
()
Date: June 11, 2012 06:08PM
They probably freaked out and tried to kill it with a rock... then noticed the delicious looking innards...
WingNut Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I think that any carnivorous moves in those days
> were probably innate.
>
> Cracking open a lobster claw was always something
> I wondered about.
Signatures are for fags
WingNut Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I think that any carnivorous moves in those days
> were probably innate.
>
> Cracking open a lobster claw was always something
> I wondered about.
Signatures are for fags
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Hay Zeus
()
Date: June 11, 2012 07:13PM
My guess is someone saw a bird or another animal eat it first
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
TheMeeper
()
Date: June 11, 2012 07:33PM
Hay Zeus Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My guess is someone saw a bird or another animal
> eat it first
Or, they realized they might starve to death and wisely adapted their diet for the purpose of survival.
-------------------------------------------------------
> My guess is someone saw a bird or another animal
> eat it first
Or, they realized they might starve to death and wisely adapted their diet for the purpose of survival.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Vexxxed
()
Date: June 11, 2012 07:42PM
TheMeeper Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hay Zeus Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > My guess is someone saw a bird or another
> animal
> > eat it first
>
>
> Or, they realized they might starve to death and
> wisely adapted their diet for the purpose of
> survival.
Death or raw oysters.
Good thing that choice wasn't left up to me otherwise mankind would not have progressed further.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hay Zeus Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > My guess is someone saw a bird or another
> animal
> > eat it first
>
>
> Or, they realized they might starve to death and
> wisely adapted their diet for the purpose of
> survival.
Death or raw oysters.
Good thing that choice wasn't left up to me otherwise mankind would not have progressed further.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
MrMephisto
()
Date: June 11, 2012 08:08PM
Hay Zeus Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My guess is someone saw a bird or another animal
> eat it first
This would be my guess. "Hey, that bird ate it and didn't die. I bet I could do that, too."
Once mankind discovered the joys of cooking food first, then they probably just cooked everything they discovered they could eat.
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
-------------------------------------------------------
> My guess is someone saw a bird or another animal
> eat it first
This would be my guess. "Hey, that bird ate it and didn't die. I bet I could do that, too."
Once mankind discovered the joys of cooking food first, then they probably just cooked everything they discovered they could eat.
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
postpoppunk
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:18PM
Who came up with eating an egg?
Seems a stretch to think..."OK, I want to eat that goo' inside the egg --- better yet, put it over fire first."
Delicious, but weird.
A Minor Threat
Seems a stretch to think..."OK, I want to eat that goo' inside the egg --- better yet, put it over fire first."
Delicious, but weird.
A Minor Threat
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Priapus
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:31PM
Man's first thought,"If I can't fuck it, then I will eat it".
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/11/2012 09:32PM by Priapus.
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 06/11/2012 09:32PM by Priapus.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
WashingTone-Locian
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:34PM
I've actually had this thought many times.
For instance, who thought to cure olives in lye? Lye will kill you. "Hey, let's soak olives in poison and see if it makes them easier to eat."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm
For instance, who thought to cure olives in lye? Lye will kill you. "Hey, let's soak olives in poison and see if it makes them easier to eat."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
TheMeeper
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:46PM
postpoppunk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who came up with eating an egg?
>
> Seems a stretch to think..."OK, I want to eat that
> goo' inside the egg
Eggs are probably easier to hunt down than the actual animal that laid them.
Better yet- why is it almost always chicken eggs? Or some domesticated bird?
Reptiles lay eggs too. At what point did humans stop eating eggs from lizards and snakes?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who came up with eating an egg?
>
> Seems a stretch to think..."OK, I want to eat that
> goo' inside the egg
Eggs are probably easier to hunt down than the actual animal that laid them.
Better yet- why is it almost always chicken eggs? Or some domesticated bird?
Reptiles lay eggs too. At what point did humans stop eating eggs from lizards and snakes?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Numbers
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:46PM
People probably saw other animals eating eggs or whatever and since all mammals offspring suck on tits when they're young, and seem to enjoy it, why not have a go.
What confuses me is eating the first vegetation. How many died from trying poisonous fruits and freaked out from chowing on hallucinogenic mushrooms and roots.
What confuses me is eating the first vegetation. How many died from trying poisonous fruits and freaked out from chowing on hallucinogenic mushrooms and roots.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Peacehawk
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:54PM
Warhawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The "Food I'd Never Eat" thread and its emphasis
> on crabs made me think of something that my kids
> and I have pondered.
>
> Have you ever thought about who might have been
> the first person to see an animal crawl out of the
> ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to
> fucking eat that. And then who figured out that
> it should be cooked first?
Excellent topic Warhawk...though admittedly I was thinking this thread would go sexual.
Remember in "Castaway" when Hanks went to cook and eat the crabs? How frustrating was that?
-------------------------------------------------------
> The "Food I'd Never Eat" thread and its emphasis
> on crabs made me think of something that my kids
> and I have pondered.
>
> Have you ever thought about who might have been
> the first person to see an animal crawl out of the
> ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to
> fucking eat that. And then who figured out that
> it should be cooked first?
Excellent topic Warhawk...though admittedly I was thinking this thread would go sexual.
Remember in "Castaway" when Hanks went to cook and eat the crabs? How frustrating was that?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
WashingTone-Locian
()
Date: June 11, 2012 09:56PM
Who came up with the idea to cook meat? You don't see chimps out there doing it. Every other animal eats meat raw. Who said, "You know, I know I've been eating this stuff raw...but maybe I out to set it on fire for a while and see how that tastes."
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Numbers
()
Date: June 11, 2012 10:00PM
WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who came up with the idea to cook meat? You don't
> see chimps out there doing it. Every other animal
> eats meat raw. Who said, "You know, I know I've
> been eating this stuff raw...but maybe I out to
> set it on fire for a while and see how that
> tastes."
No other animals know how to make fire.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who came up with the idea to cook meat? You don't
> see chimps out there doing it. Every other animal
> eats meat raw. Who said, "You know, I know I've
> been eating this stuff raw...but maybe I out to
> set it on fire for a while and see how that
> tastes."
No other animals know how to make fire.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
TheMeeper
()
Date: June 11, 2012 10:07PM
Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> What confuses me is eating the first vegetation.
> How many died from trying poisonous fruits and
> freaked out from chowing on hallucinogenic
> mushrooms and roots.
I wonder that too. Not so much the poisonous stuff. But who figured out we couldn't eat (eg.) oak leaves. Or maple leaves. Stuff like that isn't poisonous, but there must have been a few groups that eventually figured out that dieting on woody tree leaves isn't sustainable nutrition. Lotsa people must have suffered trying to figure this stuff out.
-------------------------------------------------------
> What confuses me is eating the first vegetation.
> How many died from trying poisonous fruits and
> freaked out from chowing on hallucinogenic
> mushrooms and roots.
I wonder that too. Not so much the poisonous stuff. But who figured out we couldn't eat (eg.) oak leaves. Or maple leaves. Stuff like that isn't poisonous, but there must have been a few groups that eventually figured out that dieting on woody tree leaves isn't sustainable nutrition. Lotsa people must have suffered trying to figure this stuff out.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
eesh
()
Date: June 11, 2012 10:50PM
Who is the sick fuck that came up with foie gras?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
MrMephisto
()
Date: June 11, 2012 10:57PM
I wonder about poisonous animals, like fugu in Japan. According to Wikipedia, they've been eating it over there for about 2,300 years, and there's still no known antidote for the poison.
The only possibility I can come up with is some powerful lord lining up a bunch of slaves or captives and making them eat the different parts to see who died.
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
The only possibility I can come up with is some powerful lord lining up a bunch of slaves or captives and making them eat the different parts to see who died.
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
eesh
()
Date: June 11, 2012 11:00PM
What about monkey brainzzzz? Who originally thought it would be a delicious meal?
Blessed are the murderous.
Blessed are the murderous.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 11, 2012 11:56PM
I would guess most of the early discoveries..... when we were still swinging from trees.... were accidental.
The smart ones understood cause and effect, the stupid ones just hung from a branch and grunted.
Still the same today....
The smart ones understood cause and effect, the stupid ones just hung from a branch and grunted.
Still the same today....
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
MrMephisto
()
Date: June 12, 2012 12:15AM
eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> What about monkey brainzzzz? Who originally
> thought it would be a delicious meal?
People in India. Duh. Didn't you see the 2nd Indiana Jones movie?
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
-------------------------------------------------------
> What about monkey brainzzzz? Who originally
> thought it would be a delicious meal?
People in India. Duh. Didn't you see the 2nd Indiana Jones movie?
--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 02:04AM
Assuming modern humans originated in Africa, why did some stay and some immigrate to China or Great Britain?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 02:35AM
ali(ass) Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Assuming modern humans originated in Africa,
>
>
> It's anthropological and scientific fact. Only
> religious zealots and racists dispute this truth.
> why did some stay and some immigrate to China or
> Great
> > Britain?
> The correct term is migrate, because these regions
> were not countries yet and one can only immigrate
> or emigrate from one country to another.
Were you one of those "special" monkeys?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Assuming modern humans originated in Africa,
>
>
> It's anthropological and scientific fact. Only
> religious zealots and racists dispute this truth.
> why did some stay and some immigrate to China or
> Great
> > Britain?
> The correct term is migrate, because these regions
> were not countries yet and one can only immigrate
> or emigrate from one country to another.
Were you one of those "special" monkeys?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 03:18AM
No, you racist retard! Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This coming from a cretin who knows absolutely
> nothing about rudimantary anthropology.
I remember you.
I came to your village and built a school.
I taught you many things, but I could never teach you how to discern.
Hopefully, you will eventually evolve into a higher primate, and when that happens, you will swing from trees with a joy that only a few monkeys ever enjoy.
-------------------------------------------------------
> This coming from a cretin who knows absolutely
> nothing about rudimantary anthropology.
I remember you.
I came to your village and built a school.
I taught you many things, but I could never teach you how to discern.
Hopefully, you will eventually evolve into a higher primate, and when that happens, you will swing from trees with a joy that only a few monkeys ever enjoy.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 04:07AM
Watch this video.
See how you run off, most likely to rape females..... in the doggie position. (your only position)
Notice how I’m looking around, thinking, pondering concepts?
That’s why I packed up my bananas and immigrated to Great Britain. They called me The Tigris.
See how you run off, most likely to rape females..... in the doggie position. (your only position)
Notice how I’m looking around, thinking, pondering concepts?
That’s why I packed up my bananas and immigrated to Great Britain. They called me The Tigris.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
shyboy
()
Date: June 12, 2012 04:48AM
Alias Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Watch this video.
>
> See how you run off, most likely to rape
> females..... in the doggie position. (your only
> position)
>
> Notice how I’m looking around, thinking,
> pondering concepts?
>
> That’s why I packed up my bananas and immigrated
> to Great Britain. They called me The Tigris.
>
>
>
Why is Alias so gay?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Watch this video.
>
> See how you run off, most likely to rape
> females..... in the doggie position. (your only
> position)
>
> Notice how I’m looking around, thinking,
> pondering concepts?
>
> That’s why I packed up my bananas and immigrated
> to Great Britain. They called me The Tigris.
>
>
>
Why is Alias so gay?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 04:48AM
English Devolution Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I feel sorry for your dentist!
I feel sorry for yours...
Attachments:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I feel sorry for your dentist!
I feel sorry for yours...
Attachments:
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 05:48AM
what are you? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I feel sorry for your supposed partner!
Don't.
Getting back to immigration, or migration, as the butterfly expert so succinctly described........ after I migrated to Great Britain, I hung around for a few hundred thousand years and then I said, shit, this place is getting boring, so I hopped on a plane and immigrated to the United States.
-------------------------------------------------------
> I feel sorry for your supposed partner!
Don't.
Getting back to immigration, or migration, as the butterfly expert so succinctly described........ after I migrated to Great Britain, I hung around for a few hundred thousand years and then I said, shit, this place is getting boring, so I hopped on a plane and immigrated to the United States.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Gordon Sumner
()
Date: June 12, 2012 07:33AM
Alias Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> what are you? Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > I feel sorry for your supposed partner!
>
> Don't.
>
> Getting back to immigration, or migration, as the
> butterfly expert so succinctly described........
> after I migrated to Great Britain, I hung around
> for a few hundred thousand years and then I said,
> shit, this place is getting boring, so I hopped on
> a plane and immigrated to the United States.
>
>
Sting?!?! Fucking bitch drops Sting all up in this mother-fucker?!?!? Are you for realz, yo? Fucking tantric mother fucking Sting? Unbelievable...
-------------------------------------------------------
> what are you? Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > I feel sorry for your supposed partner!
>
> Don't.
>
> Getting back to immigration, or migration, as the
> butterfly expert so succinctly described........
> after I migrated to Great Britain, I hung around
> for a few hundred thousand years and then I said,
> shit, this place is getting boring, so I hopped on
> a plane and immigrated to the United States.
>
>
Sting?!?! Fucking bitch drops Sting all up in this mother-fucker?!?!? Are you for realz, yo? Fucking tantric mother fucking Sting? Unbelievable...
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
Alias
()
Date: June 12, 2012 01:24PM
Gordon Sumner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sting?!?! Fucking bitch drops Sting all up in this
> mother-fucker?!?!? Are you for realz, yo? Fucking
> tantric mother fucking Sting? Unbelievable...
How's your sex life, Gordon?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sting?!?! Fucking bitch drops Sting all up in this
> mother-fucker?!?!? Are you for realz, yo? Fucking
> tantric mother fucking Sting? Unbelievable...
How's your sex life, Gordon?
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
small-brained large-toothed homo
()
Date: June 12, 2012 03:08PM
ali(ass) Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Assuming modern humans originated in Africa,
>
>
> It's anthropological and scientific fact. Only
> religious zealots and racists dispute this truth.
>
>
> why did some stay and some immigrate to China or
> Great
> > Britain?
>
>
> The correct term is migrate, because these regions
> were not countries yet and one can only immigrate
> or emigrate from one country to another.
LOL!!
Did you actually think it necessary to inform Alias that Great Britain wasn't a country at the time hominids were playing with sticks in Kenya?
And, I'm sure she enjoyed your lecture on the definition of migration.
See, what she wrote wasn't meant to be taken literally, but rather..... ah, forget it...... you got some evolving to do, son.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Assuming modern humans originated in Africa,
>
>
> It's anthropological and scientific fact. Only
> religious zealots and racists dispute this truth.
>
>
> why did some stay and some immigrate to China or
> Great
> > Britain?
>
>
> The correct term is migrate, because these regions
> were not countries yet and one can only immigrate
> or emigrate from one country to another.
LOL!!
Did you actually think it necessary to inform Alias that Great Britain wasn't a country at the time hominids were playing with sticks in Kenya?
And, I'm sure she enjoyed your lecture on the definition of migration.
See, what she wrote wasn't meant to be taken literally, but rather..... ah, forget it...... you got some evolving to do, son.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
bravehart
()
Date: June 12, 2012 05:42PM
small-brained large-toothed homo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Did you actually think it necessary to inform
> Alias that Great Britain wasn't a country at the
> time hominids were playing with sticks in Kenya?
She's a white supremacist.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Did you actually think it necessary to inform
> Alias that Great Britain wasn't a country at the
> time hominids were playing with sticks in Kenya?
She's a white supremacist.
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
whiteMonkey
()
Date: June 14, 2012 02:53AM
bravehart Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> She's a white supremacist.
You're a black racist.
Attachments:
-------------------------------------------------------
> She's a white supremacist.
You're a black racist.
Attachments:
Re: First Timers
Posted by:
itchy
()
Date: June 14, 2012 06:02AM
Warhawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Have you ever thought about who might have been
> the first person to see an animal crawl out of the
> ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to
> fucking eat that. And then who figured out that
> it should be cooked first?
I often wondered who ate the first pussy. What time period did this occur and what kind of hygiene practices were used back then? What was that man (or woman) thinking when he/she decided to finally eat the bearded clam instead of pounce it?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Have you ever thought about who might have been
> the first person to see an animal crawl out of the
> ocean or see in a forest and think...I'm going to
> fucking eat that. And then who figured out that
> it should be cooked first?
I often wondered who ate the first pussy. What time period did this occur and what kind of hygiene practices were used back then? What was that man (or woman) thinking when he/she decided to finally eat the bearded clam instead of pounce it?