Genkstar Wrote:
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> First of all, for all of those people on this
> thread who are poking fun, talking shit, etc.
> seriously, you people are pathetic losers who have
> nothing better to do with your so-called awesome
> lives than to go online to a suicide threat and
> talk shit? Its people like you that make this
> world fucked hence we want to kill ourselves.
> Now as for myself. I am 28yo, and my life really
> blows. I got hooked on drugs as a high school
> senior drop out. Though I got my GED, I failed in
> numerous colleges. I was a bit husky throughout my
> entire life as well as pretty shy when it came to
> talking to females, and I didn't have a gf until I
> was 19. From there on out I wish I was gay. I have
> had 5 different types of gfs from different races,
> ages, backgrounds, etc. All ended the same way. I
> was dumped because after I found out they cheated
> on me they of course had to make it all about
> them. Why was I cheated on? Well apparently all
> women love to have a couple of things. One is a
> wonderful, loving, caring, sweet guy who loves
> them, takes care of them, etc. The second is a guy
> who has I'd say at least an 8 incher but some even
> prefer way bigger. So usually a guy who looks good
> and had a huge cock can get any chick he wants
> whenever he wants hence he usually doesn't keep
> them same girl for too long and will have many at
> one time, cheating on his gf. But a nice, sweet
> good giy, usually tends to be the guy who can't
> get anyone he wants and is lucky to have that
> special someone. So the females love to find a bf
> like me, husky, 6incher, but sweet, living,
> honest, caring, extremely faithful, etc. But at
> same time they also want to be pounded by a hot
> guy with a monster cock. So they all cheated on me
> with lots of different guys with huge dicks, as if
> I wouldn't be able to tell that in the morning I
> can only get 2 fingers in and in the evening my
> entire fist slides in. And yet I never cheated on
> them even after the fact, but they still made it
> out to be my fault, as if when I turned 18 I spent
> all my money elsewhere and didn't buy myself that
> big huge dick. Like I ever had a fucking choice,
> yet I don't understand, if you love big cock, why
> can't you ask me on our first date, hey Mike, how
> big is your dick? Umm Jamie it's not big at all,
> it's only 6 inches long and 5.5inches
> circumference. Oh I c Mike. Well I am truly sorry
> but I prefer huge dick so we are not compatible.
> Take care. Ok Jamie, thank you for your honesty.
> Good luck finding your big dick.
> Thats it. So fucking easy. But no. They lie and
> tell you you're huge and the biggest that they've
> ever had and how amazing you are in bed, all while
> sneaking around fucking Bubba, the black guy with
> 3 fucking legs!
> Anyways, so its been about 4 years since I've been
> with a girl. I figure that my only option is to
> find a very religious virgin who believes in sex
> only after marriage and doesn't believe in divorce
> or cheating for it's a sin, but in the US,
> especially Los Angeles, CA, that is almost
> impossible to find because it seems like every
> girl loses their virginity at the age of 5 and by
> the time they are 18 they've already had more
> dicks inside them than a cheap skidrow hoe!
>
> So after doing lots of different types of drugs, I
> got addicted to heroin. Then by a money hungry
> doctor like all medical professionals in the US
> was bamboozled into getting on methadone
> maintenance, which I have been stuck for 3 plus
> years. To get off of methadone one has to overcome
> 1-3months of the most painful fucking withdrawals
> around. All the fucking treatment ie
> detoxification and rehabilitation facilities are a
> huge scam in the US. They have a success rate of
> about 10%-20% and cost a shitload of money if you
> don't have insurance, but if you do, then the
>
insurance still will only cover the bare minimum
> of days, like last time they only covered 6 days
> of my methadone detox and that's only 3 days into
> my withdrawals since it takes 3 days to get it out
> of your system and start thw withdrawals. The only
> treatment that work and has an 85%+ success rate
> is Ibogaine Treatment, but of course in the US
> where the government is in bed with Mexican
> cartels, as well as the big pharmaceutical
> companies, they would never legalize Ibogaine
> treatments because then literally it will bankrupt
> the entire illegal addictive drug business over
> night! So to do that treatment on must go to
> either Canada, Mexico, Costa Rica, Italy, etc. and
> pay in cash anywhere from $5,000-$10,000 which of
> course I can't afford.
>
> Now another thing about me. My family and I were
> born in Russia and move here in 89. Unlike
> Americans my parents believed in spanking me, so
> both my mom and dad whooped my ass until I was
> like 13-14. But that I don't mind. They never beat
> me for no reason. But one thing I mind is that my
> parents, especially my dad always yells and
> screams at me. For 28 fucking years and I can't
> take it any more. Example: last week my dad comes
> home from work at around 9pm. I am lying on the
> couch watching tv, as my phone rings. I check to
> see who is calling, and it's my dad. I tried to
> answer but my phone accidently rejects it. At that
> moment he walks into the house from work. I ask
> him, hey dad why did you call me just now. He
> replies with an attitude and loud voice, I didn't
> call you. I said what do you mean, I just go a
> missed.... And before I could even finish, he just
> starts yelling at the top of his voice, I DIDN'T
> FUCKING CALL YOU, YOU ARE FUCKING CRAZY BECAUSE OF
> YOUR METHADONE. WHAT TIME DO YOU TAKE IT, RIGHT
> BEFORE I GET HOME. RAAAH RAAH RAAH!
>
> And thats just one example. Its like that
> throughout the day. Its like he get annoyed at
> everything. How can someone be normal and sane
> when one's parents constantly yell at them for no
> fucking reason, daily, for every day of their
> lives. And when I bring it up, they are like well
> how can we not yell at you, look what you're doing
> to us with your drug use. And I'm like but you've
> been yelling at me since I was a baby, 19years
> before I started any drugs, how can I be sober and
> take this shit daily. And they just deny it as if
> I'm fucking crazy and just trying to blame them
> for my drug use, and that its normal to yell and
> that they DON'T do it often.
>
> Now I was given an ultimatum, that in 30 day, 15
> days left, I either leave the house and be
> homeless on skidrow or go into a free detox/rehab
> facility. Anything free is basically a room with
> dozens of other drug addicted guys who usually are
> either homeless and dirty, or criminals who were
> forced by court to be there, and everyone is sick
> and you get no real medicine other than maybe some
> advil and maybe some vitamens, and you have to
> suffer in the worst pain amongst dozens of other
> men, all cramped in on room, where everyone is
> suffering, and its extremely uncomfortable on top
> of the horrible pain. I am sorry but if I had that
> much self will to withstand several months of
> gruelling hell of pain and discomfort amongst
> dozens of dirty, nasty, fucked up people, then I
> would've kicked everything cold turkey a long as
> time ago. So it looks like since I can' afford a
> good painless detox, and I am not going to suffer
> in pain for months that in 2 weeks I will be
> homeless yet again, though this time for good. I
> was thinking about buying Ibogaine online, but
> since its a Schedule 1 narcotic in the US, I am
> risking a felony, and also it is very pricey of
> about $200-$500 for a gram, and one needs at least
> a couple of grams for initial dosage and then at
> least one or two grams split up for cravings and
> pain afterwards. So it can end up costing me
> anywhere from $800-$2,000 just to get the medicine
> shipped to me. And if course since it only grows
> in Africa, its much harder to find, and since
> you're buying it online basically from either drug
> dealers or other type of vendors, it is a risk
> that I'll be scammed out of my money, set up in a
> honeypot, or sent fake shit that either won't work
> when I take it or cause serious damage to my body
> and or mind, again my options are very limited and
> by the looks of it, I will end up on the street.
> And even as a drug addict, I never had it in me to
> hurt people, rob or steal from them, etc. So the
> only way I will be able to make money to continue
> to either use heroin or stick with methadone will
> be to either sell drugs and or pan handle, and
> both are illegal in California, and both will end
> me up in jail, which I've only been once and even
> then, the case was dropped because I did nothing
> wrong and the cops were jerks!
>
> So yea, my life really blows. I am the
> disappointment of the family, while my younger
> sister is the perfect child, mom's favorite, they
> always hangout, talk about me, and she bosses me
> around as is she was my mom, when she is almost 6
> years younger!Not to mention my mom always backs
> her up and protects her and stands up for her,
> basically allowing her to treat me however she
> wants.
>
> I don't want to be homeless, I don't want to
> suffer in horrible pain and discomfort for months,
> and then even if I make it through the
> withdrawals, the cravings will always be there and
> they get so big and overwhelming that sooner or
> later I would relapse like I've done mant times
> before. Ibogaine not only treats you with painless
> withdrawal in 24-36 hours, but it completely
> cleans out your organs and brain to the point
> where they are brand new like before one used
> before, and it also blocks one's receptors thus
> you have no craving for alomst a year, and of
> course after that, with some therapy, one will no
> longer have the want, desire, need to use ever
> again! That is why it has a 8-9 out 10 people
> success rate unlike all the available treatment
> methods in the US which have maybe a 1-2 out of 10
> people success rate! Treatments like medical detox
> with either methadone tapering, Suboxone, Subutex,
> Morphine, etc. Also blood transfusion treatment,
> and then your standard 12 step programs and
> rehabs, all of which are a sham that might work
> for that one lucky person or two out of every
> dozen!
>
> So with my situation, my limited options, I am
> just tried as hell, and just don't have the will
> to live anymore. Some may say stop your whining
> and put up with the pain like a man, and then give
> me examples of all the pain they have or had and
> how they didn't kill themselves. Well all I got to
> say to you is, Go Fuck Yourself! Just because you
> can put up with pain everday, or tour life sucked
> but you dealt with it, and you went out and made
> the change on your own for the best, etc. That
> doesn't mean everyone is like you. I hate pain and
> hate putting up with it. I am not like you, and I
> tried to make changes, I even tried starting an
> online company, to have it fail because of the
> company I used to build my custom website
> database, took $25,000 and then after a year of
> working on it building it from scratch, the
> company closed screwing 15,000 customers, and
> since it was an LLC, the business had no money, so
> the owner wasn't liable and living the dream and
> is working as a ceo of his sister's and cousin's
> online company which is a replica of his company
> that subsequently opened up the day after his
> company closed its doors. Suing didn't help
> because they owed 1.5 million in back taxes to
> irs, so uncle sam got his first. Then they owed
> hundreds of thousands to other companies like
> health insurance, etc, so the major Corps got
> their share, and by then my $25k was gone and I
> got no site and no refund and had to shut my
> business down before it even started. That has
> been the story of my life, therefore, don't sit
> there behind your pc and tell me how you are a
> success story. I am not and I am tired and all I
> want to do is die. For years I've been selfless
> thinking about the pain I'd cause my family, but
> why do I have to suffer every fucking day just so
> that my family won't have to have a funeral and
> mourn?
>
> So I am asking for only serious replies. No jokes
> or shit talking because those people are the true
> losers who have nothing better in their life than
> to go to a site about suicide and shit talk.
>
> Anyways, please tell me a very painless, quick,
> cheap, not messy way to off oneself!
>
> Also, and females out there in the Los Angeles
> area who also are just plain done with putting up
> with this so-called misery called life, and want
> to get together to talk about our problems and
> hate for our lives, and to figure and plan on how
> to off ourselves, we can then help each other
> succeed in our goals. I believe it will be very
> beneficial and comforting to have the opposite sex
> with me with same desire to end it all because
> this is a very difficult and scary solution and it
> would be nice to have someone with me, by myside
> on the journey to the otherside.
>
> For any suggestions or if you want to get together
> to plan the journey out of this misery and don't
> want to do it alone, email me at
>
genkstar420@yahoo.com.
>
> Thank you for reading, and good luck to all!
>
> P.S. This doesn't work for me because of my
> tolerance, but for others, a very quick and
> painless way is to OD on heroin. You don't feel
> anything, and before you even get a chance to take
> the syringe out of your vein, you already will be
> out! If you have never used any kind of opiates
> before, and you're on the west coast especially So
> Cali, black tar heroin is what we have here. I
> recommend buying at least an 8th of an oz, usually
> good tar costs about $60-$100 per gram so an 8th
> will run you around $200-$350, and I recommend
> also going to a needle exchange an getting a
> larger gauged syringe, that is at least 3cc/300ml
> because when you cook up that much tar, if you
> won't use enough water it will come out almost
> like a syrup and a small gauge need like 29, 28,
> and 27 will not suck it up into the syringe or if
> it will, by the time you are in your vein the dope
> would've cooled a bit and get syrupy and won't
> come out. If you get the brown powder version of
> the tar, usually comes in balloons, then I believe
> depending on the size of the ballons, a pacqeté
> or packet, which is usually 20-24 balloons, should
> be enough. Again large gauge in order to do all at
> once.
> If you are lucky and know a connect, or are on
> East Coast or even Midwest, then getting China
> White is you best bet. Again I'd get at least an
> 8th, but with China White, which is more expensive
> and is anywhere from $100-$300/gram or $350-$1000
> an 8th depending on your location, the quality,
> the dealer, etc. But since its a white or golden
> or greyish off white powder, it dissolves in water
> instantly, and you really don't need to cook it
> like tar, so it won't turn into a syrup so you
> don't really need more than 1cc/100ml syringe...
> Then just inject either into a nice fat vein on
> your arm where it bends at the elbow, or even
> quick, on side of your neck, look into mirror,
> close your mouth and blow out but don't let the
> air come out and you'll see the vein pop out on
> side of your neck. Go in at about 45 degree angle,
> once in, draw in the syringe a bit to see if when
> you do it starts filling up with blood, if so,
> then push it in slowly so that the dope goes into
> vein. Stop if it really burns because you aren't
> in vein, draw back up to see if it fills up with
> blood, if not, don't pull it out, just move it
> around while every slightly drawing up until it
> starts to fill up with blood again, once it does,
> continue to slowly push the dope in. Once its all
> in, you should go out instantly with such a high
> dosage. If not, well enjoy the most amazing orgasm
> like rush, and you'll feel high and awesome for at
> least a whole day in not more since its your first
> time. If it didn't work, I'd wait at least a week
> or two, then I'd double my dosage. 7 grams will
> definitely kill you! GOOD LUCK!
15 minutes or less.
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