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Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Buddy Chocolate ()
Date: June 17, 2011 08:47PM

Hello my name is Von and I'm a young black woman. I hope to discuss engaging and eye opening topics with all individuals (not just African Americans). However, if you are a NON-BLACK individual and you come here thinking you know what's good for black people be prepared to get your ass handed back to you.

I'm not here to make friends, woo fans, or kiss anyone's ass.

Please note that my opinion HAS and WILL change on certain topics from time-to-time. Can you dig it?




Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women

1.Black women make black men feel under appreciated, unwarranted, irresponsible and regressive.
2. Black women are too aggressive and no longer patient in waiting on the pursuit of a men.
3. Black women are strong headed, too independent which presents great challenges in relationships.
4. Black women are masculine in that they are controlling and like to run the relationship.
5. Black women expect too much. They are gold diggers who will not look twice at a blue collar black man.
6. Black women are hot headed and have bad attitudes.
7. Black women stop caring about their appearance after a certain age.
8. Black women are not as sexually open as other races especially in regards to oral sex.
9. Black women's tolerance is far too low. They are no longer empathetic to the black man's struggle in White America.
10. Black women do not cater to their men.

Okay here's the deal....while I will acknowledge almost everything (not all) on this list is somewhat valid and I do know several black women who fit some or all of the above, I also acknowledge that there is a counterargument that can be made by black women for each of the above. Oh and by the way...the list above confirms my theory on miscegenation with MOST black men: They don't date outside the race out of love for other races of women, but instead out of spite for black women.
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: T-Bone ()
Date: June 17, 2011 08:50PM

cant say i can argue with dat logic

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Date: June 17, 2011 09:01PM

Only one reason - Black women won't put up with a black man's bullshit when white and Asian women will.

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http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 17, 2011 09:06PM

The counterargument...


1. Black women make black men feel under appreciated, unwarranted, irresponsible, and regressive.Realistically speaking too many black men are irresponsible and regressive. If this were not the case then black women would have nothing to say about black men. There are too many single parent homes, out of wedlock children, and fatherless children in the black community for any black man to try to argue with this point. So, if black men are not feeling appreciated it's probably because black men AS A COLLECTIVE haven't given black women anything to appreciate them for unless we're talking about the high number of fatherless children walking around.

2. Black women are too aggressive and no longer patient in waiting on the pursuit of men. It's hard for me to even take this one seriously. Are black men complaining about black women approaching them? or Are black men complaining about the fact that black women are no longer waiting for them to approach? If black women waited on the pursuit of black men it's clear from the above list that many would be waiting a long damn time. I find this complaint funny because many vocal black men are claiming that black women don't seem to want them anymore and find them somewhat of a burden. So where the hell is this complaint coming from?


3.Black women are strong headed, too independent which presents great challenges in relationships. While I agree many black women are strong headed and too independent it is not a mystery how they got to this point. Black men have proven themselves to be "weak" when it really matters. These women have had no choice but to be strong and independent. They have to be strong in this world where they are a double minority: Black and female. Also, they really have to be strong to be able to hold their heads up when the men in their race are busy trying to put them down at every turn. Black women are called bitches and hoes so frequently by black men that's it's no wonder some have embraced the terms as their nicknames. Those who haven't embraced these terms have every right to hold their heads up high.

4. Black women are masculine in that they are controlling and like to run the relationship. Um...what relationship? According to some black men, there is no relationship between black men and black women. From what I've seen of black relations black women are usually the faithful level-headed members of the relationship. If that makes one masculine then I guess so be it. But wouldn't someone have to be masculine in the relationship when SOME of the men are notoriously feminine and suffering from a "baby boy" type mentality (another blog post to come).


5. Black women expect too much. They are gold diggers who will not look twice at a blue collar black man. This is bullshit if I've ever heard it. Every man in my family is a blue collar worker in that they are NOT rich or wealthy. I think some black men are confused about what constitutes a "blue collar worker." If a black man is making a decent enough living to provide for a family then he's good with most black women. All women want that outstanding Alpha man, but all women come to settle for the "common" man because they are the majority. I honestly think this belief was spread by some low-self esteem having nerd. You attract who you are!


6. Black women are hot headed and have bad attitudes. This is the only point that I can't really argue with. I see this everyday to know it to be true. So, yes on this one complaint black women need to change! However, if the men of your race were constantly putting you through hell and back wouldn't you have a bad attitude too?


7. Black women stop caring about their appearance after a certain age. And I suppose the typical black man is looking like LL Cool J at age 50?!?! Give me a break...when a woman reaches age thirty things start to "drop." That's not the woman's fault...that's nature. While women give birth and have periods what excuse do black men have for their obesity, double chins, and guts? Women don't put as much emphasis on looks as men do, but if black women start to do so there will be alot of black men thrown under the bus.


8. Black women are not as sexually open as other races, especially in regards to oral sex. Can black women be blamed for this one? Hell no! Who wants to suck on nine inches of AIDS? That's not to say that all black men have AIDS because they do not, but oral sex equals sperm and sperm equals blood. So, the hell with black men if they can't live without this shit! One thing I've come to see is black men love to get head but rarely give it. If these other races of women have no problem giving and never receiving then I can't do anything but shake my damn head!


9. Black women's tolerance is far too low. They are no longer empathetic to the black man's struggle in White America. And other non-black women are empathetic to the black man's struggle in White America? How dumb can you get? If there is any other group of people that should understand the black man's struggle it's black women. Part of the reason why black women are no longer empathetic to the black man's struggle in White America is because black men are choosing to marry into White America!!!!! How the hell can you bitch about racism but turn around and marry white women? That doesn't make any sense black men! Furthermore, black women are successfully overcoming their struggle in White America and we are double minorities. Sure the white man sometimes demotes the black man and promotes the black woman but alot of this shit can be blamed on black men. There is no excuse for black women finishing college on time and black men finishing college (undergraduate) in 5-6 years. If you work hard you will get where you want to be in life...it's that simple. With the election of Barack Obama what excuse do black men really have left? Yes, racism is still present but things are not near as bad as they use to be...but even back then black men seemed to be doing better than they are today. You have to accept some of the responsibility for your plight and stop being the damn victim!


10. Black women do not cater to their men. After looking at everything I've written above ask yourself why should black women cater to black men? Black men don't seem to want to cater to black women. You get what you give out of a relationship. What many black men don't seem to understand is that marriage/relationships are a 50/50 split. Black men, have to understand that they can't come to the table with 20% and expect black women to come with 80%. Many of the demands black men place on black women are not placed on other races of women. It's almost as if they feel honored to be in the presence of other races of women therefore don't demand as much from them while black women are continually mistreated and taken for granted. By all means if being with other races of women makes you feel more like a man then I say good-bye.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 17, 2011 09:07PM

african art
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: hoocoodanode ()
Date: June 17, 2011 09:23PM

I've seen this type of list before--including one for reasons not to marry/date white women (there was a website called nomarriage.com or something). It leads me to believe that the writer can't get the "hot" woman he wants, so he vilifies every woman in that race.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: yep ()
Date: June 17, 2011 11:20PM

11) Black women's vaginas are too loose.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ProVallone ()
Date: June 18, 2011 12:02PM

True, there aren't too many Phylica Rashads around.
There ARE plenty of Weezy's and Florida's.
But my brothers go for the ho skeezer types, nome sane?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Funny_Guy ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:41AM

I got news for you, white guys don't date/marry black girls for the same reason.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: real reason ()
Date: June 19, 2011 10:13AM

You have to remember that black women created black men. Meaning the mothers raise their little black boys. She shows him it is fine to have a black man come over for a booty call and leave before the cum dries on the floor. She shows it it is fine to always by her man cigaretts and colt 45 and drive him to the store. So it is the black woman's fault for showing him it is fine to be disrespected by a man.
But the main reason black men do not marry black women is the smell.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Date: June 19, 2011 10:17AM

I love how all the blame is placed on black women. I guess it is too much to ask that a man hold down a job, come home every night and act like a decent father.

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http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: hmmmm ()
Date: June 19, 2011 10:30AM

I can't speak to everything on the above list, but this one is true:

"6. Black women are hot headed and have bad attitudes."

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: real reason ()
Date: June 19, 2011 10:46AM

Black men do not have good examples of a "decent" father. Black women show their male children that is is OK not to be a decent father by allowing different men to father the mothers children. Why do you think black women have four kids to four different men a couple years apart from each other? Black boys are a product of thier enviorment.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: craven moorehead ()
Date: June 19, 2011 10:54AM

real reason Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Black men do not have good examples of a "decent"
> father. Black women show their male children that
> is is OK not to be a decent father by allowing
> different men to father the mothers children. Why
> do you think black women have four kids to four
> different men a couple years apart from each
> other? Black boys are a product of thier
> enviorment.


I am not racist but I have found that the vast majority of black girls smell really bad and I feel that having sex with a black girl would be like doing it with an animal. I work with a few black ladies and they are nice and I help them out sometimes but I would not want to eat lunch with them because of the smell. Just being honest- not racist.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: marring white guys ()
Date: June 19, 2011 04:44PM

Funny_Guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I got news for you, white guys don't date/marry
> black girls for the same reason.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: secreatbunny ()
Date: June 19, 2011 05:10PM

white guy are not whAT U SAY THEY ARE I BEEN MY SHARE AND ITS MY EXPIERENCE THEY WANT A BREAK FROM WHIT FEMALES CAUSE THEY ARE MONEY HUNGRY AND DONT APRECIATE THEM THEY ALSO WANT THE WORLD ON AN A SILVER PLATTER HANNDED TO THEM DAILY HERES MY HUSBAND HE WANT TO SAY A FEW THINS IM HIS OWN WORDS bear with his spelling. i was dprived of black women because my mom is rascist and i fel blak women deserve white men more because yall appreciate us more and yall dont do like white girls mand- white girls cheat on us with (other grls) (their brothers) they step dads ) their friends man) and do orgys and shit im tired of that so i went get a real women and yall we b trying to aproach yall we be looking at yal and we trying to get the nerve to come say something but yall be like saying quote ( what the fuck that white boy looking at me for) he go get his ass knockd out so we walk away yall make us feel like we aint got a chance in hell )) i was luck to get me angelica she saw me looking at her and she walked up to me yall she was so you like what you see i thought manthis girl probably got a man she go make him kick my ass!! i was like i didnt meaan nuting by it se smile at me and she said its ok i like what i see then she was like how would you like to see me again this wkn i was yeah so we started dating and we got like kids together now been together for 5yeas now i been asking to marry me but she not radey yet iguess

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Florida Evans ()
Date: June 19, 2011 05:54PM

The 70's back when Black Men married Black Women...

Good Times.
Any time you meet a payment
Good Times
Any time you need a friend
Good Times
Any time you're out from under

Not getting hassled, not getting hustled
Keepin' your head above water
Making a wave when you can

Temporary lay offs
Good Times
Easy credit rip offs
Good Times
Scratchin' and surviving
Good Times
Hangin in a chow line
Good Times
Ain't we lucky we got 'em
Good Times.
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Concerned Racist ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:15PM

I’m NOT a conservative but I believe that you should speak the truth even if against one’s self.

Our neighborhood used to be nice prior to the recession. When the housing market crashed several home owners ran to the county government to find section 8 occupants in order to avoid foreclosing. Prior to that ethnic makeup of our area was predominately Latino, Asian, Indian, White, and Arab. What I’ve seen in the past two years is in influx of unemployed and uneducated black men move into our areas by way of their intimate relationships with white women.

Von, NOT only am I afraid of men of those demographics but I’m also afraid of the WOMEN who are enabling dysfunctional and disrespectful behavior. I too am afraid of black men of the demographic Juan speaks of. I must speak the truth as I see it. I don’t want to be NEAR any woman of ANY race who associates with those types of men.

Our HOA is NOW working to reform our By Laws. They are now working to ban section 8 rentals and are cracking down on rental properties overall. The folks who sit on our board have a good relationship with the police department who often patrol our area.

I don’t believe Juan is trying to score political points and I have SERIOUS issue with white liberals who believe they have the authority to dictate to black people what we should or shouldn’t believe as if we lack the ability to think critically. I’m offended by their hypocrisy

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: John Tuttlemeyer ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:28PM

We can continue to reap profits from the Blacks without the effort of physical slavery Look at the current methods of containment that they use on themselves: IGNORANCE, GREED, and SELFISHNESS.

Their IGNORANCE is the primary weapon of containment. A great man once said, "The best way to hide something from Black people is to put it in a book." We now live in the Information Age. They have gained the opportunity to read any book on any subject through the efforts of their fight for freedom, yet they refuse to read. There are numerous books readily available at Borders, Barnes & Noble, and Amazon.com, not to mention their own Black Bookstores that provide solid blueprints to reach economic equality (which should have been their fight all along), but few read consistently, if at all.

GREED is another powerful weapon of containment. Blacks, since the abolition of slavery, have had large amounts of money at their disposal. Last year they spent 10 billion dollars during Christmas, out of their 450 billion dollars in total yearly income (2.22%).

Any of us can use them as our target market, for any business venture we care to dream up, no matter how outlandish, they will buy into it. Being primarily a consumer people, they function totally by greed. They continually want more, with little thought for saving or investing.

They would rather buy some new sneaker than invest in starting a business. Some even neglect their children to have the latest Tommy or FUBU, And they still think that having a Mercedes, and a big house gives them "Status" or that they have achieved their Dream.

They are fools! The vast majority of their people are still in poverty because their greed holds them back from collectively making better communities.

With the help of BET, and the rest of their black media that often broadcasts destructive images into their own homes, we will continue to see huge profits like those of Tommy and Nike. (Tommy Hilfiger has even jeered them, saying he doesn't want their money, and look at how the fools spend more with him than ever before!). They'll continue to show off to each other while we build solid communities with the profits from our businesses that we market to them.

SELFISHNESS, ingrained in their minds through slavery, is one of the major ways we can continue to contain them. One of their own, Dubois said that there was an innate division in their culture. A "Talented Tenth" he called it. He was correct in his deduction that there are segments of their culture that has achieved some "form" of success.
However, that segment missed the fullness of his work. They didn't read that the "Talented Tenth" was then responsible to aid The Non-Talented Ninety Percent in achieving a better life. Instead, that segment has created another class, a Buppie class that looks down on their people or aids them in a condescending manner.

They will never achieve what we have. Their selfishness does not allow them to be able to work together on any project or endeavor of substance. When they do get together, their selfishness lets their egos get in the way of their goal Their so-called help organizations seem to only want to promote their name without making any real change in their community.

They are content to sit in conferences and conventions in our hotels, and talk about what they will do, while they award plaques to the best speakers, not to the best doers. Is there no end to their selfishness? They steadfastly refuse to see that TOGETHER EACH ACHIEVES MORE (TEAM)

They do not understand that they are no better than each other because of what they own, as a matter of fact, most of those Buppies are but one or two pay checks away from poverty. All of which is under the control of our pens in our offices and our rooms.

Yes, we will continue to contain them as long as they refuse to read, continue to buy anything they want, and keep thinking they are "helping" their communities by paying dues to organizations which do little other than hold lavish conventions in our hotels. By the way, don't worry about any of them reading this letter, remember, 'THEY DON'T READ!!!!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Freeman ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:31PM

C'mon in relation to most people in the US we are consistent. There is a total dumbing down of everyone but people tend to forget that everyone making cars isn't exactly a rocket scientist either.

Our problems are in direct relation to us not owning our industries. Once we concentrate fully on that then this rampant ignorance will decline along with it. Throughout history Black folk has been kept out of the revenue stream but we are changing that little by little and this will be a funny footnote in history if anyone even brings it up ever again.

There is a natural evolution when it comes to money and it's understanding. From consumer to Merchant to mogul to Titan. We have some moguls and some merchants but in due time someone will invent Apple and won't ask whitey to back it.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Concerned Citizen ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:32PM

Most people dont read. It isnt unique to blacks.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: lavender ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:33PM

Very true. I once dated a guy who was surprised at the fact that I read under no constraint. Meaning I don't read just for school, I read just to read...

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:37PM

I don't care what anyone says…I believe all white people hold prejudice views against black people. That includes those who are married to black people. Their prejudice can be as settle as thinking their white skin makes them coveted to African Americans (therefore thinking they are better than the same sex who happen to be African American. An example would be a white woman married to a black man who thinks her skin color makes her better than African American women) or it can be as open as saying, “African Americans are hopeless bums.” My point this: Even the so-called white people who don't think they hold any prejudice views do in fact hold stereotypical ideologies against black people in some way, shape, or form.

I admit it...I'm prejudiced against whites. However, I truly believe the prejudice that black people feel towards whites is a reaction to their racism. I don't have a problem with other races of people. My problem is solely with whites (particularly the American whites). So, you can see why I don't understand how other African Americans can acknowledge the actions of whites yet still desire to be with them...Help me understand.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Funny_Guy ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:43PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I don't care what anyone says…I believe all
> white people hold prejudice views against black
> people. That includes those who are married to
> black people. Their prejudice can be as settle as
> thinking their white skin makes them coveted to
> African Americans (therefore thinking they are
> better than the same sex who happen to be African
> American. An example would be a white woman
> married to a black man who thinks her skin color
> makes her better than African American women) or
> it can be as open as saying, “African Americans
> are hopeless bums.” My point this: Even the
> so-called white people who don't think they hold
> any prejudice views do in fact hold stereotypical
> ideologies against black people in some way,
> shape, or form.
>
> I admit it...I'm prejudiced against whites.
> However, I truly believe the prejudice that black
> people feel towards whites is a reaction to their
> racism. I don't have a problem with other races of
> people. My problem is solely with whites
> (particularly the American whites). So, you can
> see why I don't understand how other African
> Americans can acknowledge the actions of whites
> yet still desire to be with them...Help me
> understand.

Well if they didn't before, they do now!!!
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:46PM

You are sooooooooo not funny

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: pnut1973 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:51PM

Salvery is real. Answer this question for me. Why did white ppl hate us so much? what did we do to them? It's easy for u to say what u say about it, because you where never beaten or raped by them.I'm not saying that black ppl should use salvery as an excuse to kill each other, but I do believe that there is a root 2 our hatred. Maybe if you use your knowledge to up lift us instead of down grading us, We can rise above all this. For there is no remembrance of the wise more than of the fool for ever.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Funny_Guy ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:52PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You are sooooooooo not funny

How about now?
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Eternity9 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:54PM

Prejudice in and of itself is a reaction to something, small or little. We go from being completely free of bias/prejudice to having them, and it varies from person to person. I know white folks, and black folks (immigrants/foreign born) who are prejudiced against African-Americans because of perceived racism, or an affront.

I had Hawaiians who were prejudiced/racist to me for no reason at all.

I don't believe that "they have all the power." I think that there is a leg up, but that can be remedied. I think African Americans have relinquished their share of American wealth in search of all the wrong things, and because of this, things have gone on the way the have.

My brain waves are going! This is a good discussion

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: GoGo112 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:56PM

Excellent post, and I love your honesty. There are some white men who feel: "hey, I date black! I'm not racist!" it's nonsese to be honest with you. Historically there have been whites who voiced their disdain for blacks, yet were having sexual relations and children with black women. My former mother in-law was lot like this. She was a white woman from france who married a black service man. When she visited me and her son, she would say ignorant things all the time. People just don't get it.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Raina ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:57PM

Girl who you telling?! On this site I visit there is this white guy who make those kind of racist comments but claims how much he loves black women. This of course includes making snide comments about black men. Thankfully most of the women on there can see his BS. It's ridiculous!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 06:58PM

Funny_Guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Von Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > You are sooooooooo not funny
>
> How about now?

So NOT funny

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: truth b told ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:01PM

I also know white people who would swear they're not racist but hold some type of negative view of black people. I had a white roommate in college. She would say stuff like, "I can't believe that's your real hair...Are you sure you don't wear a weave? Most black girls do." Yet if you called her on it she would say, "I'm not prejudice. I fuck with black men."

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: r u ready ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:06PM

Prejudice in and of itself is a reaction to something, small or little. We go from being completely free of bias/prejudice to having them, and it varies from person to person. I know white folks, and black folks (immigrants/foreign born) who are prejudiced against African-Americans because of perceived racism, or an affront.

I had Hawaiians who were prejudiced/racist to me for no reason at all.

I don't believe that "they have all the power." I think that there is a leg up, but that can be remedied. I think African Americans have relinquished their share of American wealth in search of all the wrong things, and because of this, things have gone on the way the have.

My brain waves are going! This is a good discussion

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:07PM

This is what I don't understand:

Black women assert that black women and children go the way of the men of the race. I don't necessarily think I agree with this idea here in America.

Africa? Yes. Here in the USA? NO.

Why?

Because we are LIBERATED women which means we no longer have to follow a man. It is OPTIONAL now and many black women through their own words (ex. I don't need or want a man...specifically a black man) have opted NOT to follow black men.

So this has lead me to question (and it happened within the last two blog post stemming from a comment to a man who frequents my blog) what the hell do black women really mean when they say black women and children go the way of the men of the race?

If they are talking about black men not taking care of their seed and making them wives I can understand.

If they are talking about RANDOM black men, who didn't have jack shit to do with the creation of their children (or the condition black women find themselves living), not taking responsibility for them in the larger sense of a community I don't understand.

We have already said their really isn't such a thing as a black community. Why continue to expect this sense of community where none exist and why continue to view yourselves as black men's disregarded laundry when you have the ability to FULLY determine your own destiny?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: butters ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:08PM

I think everyone makes good points.

I just want to put in perspective here. People blame other people for why they don't get ahead in life. The white supremacist blames the Jews. The blacks blame the whites. I tend to go away from blaming white people.

I do think black people have it harder than most because "other racial groups" are afraid of us. If you think this is exclusive to white people than you are wrong. Even other black people display this hatred to other black people.

I remember when I first got her my white landlord who is a congressman. Made me pay two security deposits. He said well had drug dealers in the past ruin his apartment and so on. Now was I mad, YES. Now does I blame him , NO. You know why because if I was in his position I would have done the same thing.

Quite often black people have never run a business so it easy to say this person is racist and so on. I have a good relationship with the Landlord now. He went out of his way for me when he realized I pay rent on time and I am pretty much a homebody with my fiancee.

What I do notice is that politicians are scapegoating black people again. The economy is bad so affirmative action is taking a white person job. The people on "top" pour gasoline on poor white people or struggling class white people. That is where a majority of the racists come from. To a white person that is struggling there is always going to be resentment towards a black person doing "better than them".

They think welfare affords black people rims on their vehicles and living the high life is roach infested apartment. Yet, trailer parks are not better. Welfare is just a fraction of the US Budget. Medicaid and Medicare is what is expensive. I will talk about health reform later.

They don't tell you about all these well to do white folks hiding their money to get medicare, nursing homes, and staff to take care of them off the system. These older people could pay for this themselves but hide their money through grandkids or friends.

Oh yea, the sub prime mess that robbed black women of their homes and wealth. They got the nerve to banks for giving loans to black people. That's funny, all those years you discriminated against blacks for wanting the American dream and now we created this mess.

That was the turning point for me. It is dirty game they are running on black people. That is why I don't fuck with them.

I just pay my bills with my salary, I don;t invest. I don't buy unnecessary shit. I take care of my credit.

Black people are the biggest consumers but we get treated like shit. When they can't treat you like shit they bring in mexicans to treat like shit. That is why California is bankrupt. They thought oh we can treat Mexicans like shit and they won't protest or argue. Yea bright idea they sucked up the system and tax payer dollars and now they broke.

The bible predicts what is going to happen.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Rashida ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:09PM

I agree that all white people hold some sort of bias/prejudice against blacks AND I believe that whites who date interracially tend to see themselves as superior to the BM/BW their partner has "rejected". I have noticed this in my experience with friends and their mates. And the black friend usually is all to willing to boost up stereotypes about their own race to make their mate feel special. It is a sick and disgusting relationship going on in a lot of these unions. It is subtle, but it is still there.

Like you said, blacks prejudice against whites usualyl stems from white racism and prejudice. There is no debate (in my eyes) about whether or not blacks can be called racist - it just doesn't work that way. A dobule standard can only exist when "all things are equal". Blacks and whites are NOT equal in this country therefore there is no dobule standard.

I predict you will get a lot of folks claiming that "individual" white men are not racist and "individual" white women aren't racist. Both white men and white women have superiority complexes that are only enhanced when they "catch" someone of another race. It demonstrates to the world that despite all the black people out there these Negroes hopped the fence and chose us. We so special.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: r u ready ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:11PM

Eternity9 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Prejudice in and of itself is a reaction to
> something, small or little. We go from being
> completely free of bias/prejudice to having them,
> and it varies from person to person. I know white
> folks, and black folks (immigrants/foreign born)
> who are prejudiced against African-Americans
> because of perceived racism, or an affront.
>
> I had Hawaiians who were prejudiced/racist to me
> for no reason at all.
>
> I don't believe that "they have all the power." I
> think that there is a leg up, but that can be
> remedied. I think African Americans have
> relinquished their share of American wealth in
> search of all the wrong things, and because of
> this, things have gone on the way the have.
>
> My brain waves are going! This is a good
> discussion

You're on-point! Here's another form of racism; the black man or black woman who has a so-called "decent" position in a company where the majority of its employees are white. They will distant themselves from the new black employee like they have the plague. I was that new black employee, what a shame!!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:13PM

I would like to ask all the black women who claim they don't want black men, don't date black men, and have no intention of ever having anything to do with black men to answer these questions:


Why do so many of you (and I'm only talking to the set of black women with these views) expound on black men not being leaders, not improving black women's condition, not being providers/protectors, and not being "real" men if you seemingly don't have any dealings with black men and don't want anything to do with them?


How can you talk about black male leadership when you have, by your own words, opted out of such a thing?


Why are you looking to black men to improve black women's condition if you have opted out of dealing with them?


Why are you putting black men in the box of providers/protectors if you don't even deal with them?


Why does it matter to you that black men aren't "real" men if you don't even deal with them?


This is something I can understand someone like myself saying because I do indeed deal with black men. As frustrated as I get with black men, I do still in fact deal with them. But if you are a black woman who claims not to want anything to do with black men, why do you continue to expect these things of them???

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: GoGo112 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:15PM

I also know white people who would swear they're not racist but hold some type of negative view of black people. I had a white roommate in college. She would say stuff like, "I can't believe that's your real hair...Are you sure you don't wear a weave? Most black girls do." Yet if you called her on it she would say, "I'm not prejudice. I fuck with black men."

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Freeman ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:16PM

Hey Von, late as hell but better late than never. I think this is where I say we will have to respectfully disagree because I've had this convo before and I see that our takes on this whole IR things stems from our beliefs in general on race relations.

I, personally, do not feel like whites have power over me or anything. Just thinking of it that way, makes me rabid with rebellion. I have been told, sometimes in the face, that I am not able to this and that, or that I will not succeed, but I've gone on to do so, sometimes outdoing my own expectations. I do not believe in giving them that much power, or anyone for that matter.

My view on life as a black woman is about being happy with me, doing right by me, staying true to me, so that I can be a positive contributor to the collective. We all bring unique strengths to the diaspora, and the only way to ensure we do that successfully everytime is to do right by self.

My love for culture, history, heritage, etc is so strong, that who I sleep with cannot touch or affect that. That love for culture is powerful and engrosses all it touches, it shines. My partner, black or white, has no choice but to submit to that and appreciate it; respect it. This is something that took years to cultivate, way before I started dating anyone.

My partner could never, would never, put asunder something that I put in so much energy into.

These racists want us to believe that they have all the power, but they don't. They like that plenty of us believe that they are running things. This reminds me of the obstacle courses at basic. More than half of the challenge was mental. Once my mental was on point, the obstacle course was a piece of cake. The illusion is maintained because too many of us rely on that illusion to explain why we have not done what we wanted to do/should be doing. When we let go of that, we will see a cosmic shift in the way things are in this country.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: r u ready ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:17PM

r u ready Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Eternity9 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Prejudice in and of itself is a reaction to
> > something, small or little. We go from being
> > completely free of bias/prejudice to having
> them,
> > and it varies from person to person. I know
> white
> > folks, and black folks (immigrants/foreign
> born)
> > who are prejudiced against African-Americans
> > because of perceived racism, or an affront.
> >
> > I had Hawaiians who were prejudiced/racist to
> me
> > for no reason at all.
> >
> > I don't believe that "they have all the power."
> I
> > think that there is a leg up, but that can be
> > remedied. I think African Americans have
> > relinquished their share of American wealth in
> > search of all the wrong things, and because of
> > this, things have gone on the way the have.
> >
> > My brain waves are going! This is a good
> > discussion
>
> You're on-point! Here's another form of racism;
> the black man or black woman who has a so-called
> "decent" position in a company where the majority
> of its employees are white. They will distant
> themselves from the new black employee like they
> have the plague. I was that new black employee,
> what a shame!!


"I think African Americans have relinquished their share of American wealth in search of all the wrong things, and because of this, things have gone on the way the have."

How so? By giving it all to white companies? African Americans as a collective don't have any wealth. Yes, the black dollar is powerful but it doesn't scratch a dent in percentage of wealth spent by other racial groups.

"I don't believe that "they have all the power." I think that there is a leg up, but that can be remedied."

How so? White supremacy is one of the main issues. It's one of the main things stopping black folks from advancing. I won't go as far as to say it is THE MAIN thing because some shit we bring on ourselves (like not appreciating education). How do you remedy what has been in place for over four hundred years? I have a remedy but it would require African Americans to completely cut off influences of the world outside the black community

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: casper ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:19PM

bs
Attachments:
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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Mmooney4 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:24PM

There is a difference between making excuses for you behavior and explaining why some thing are the way that they are. I am an African American woman in college right now majoring in Law and African American Studies, without also being critical, especially if there is still debate among respected academics about the genuine/or non genuine nature of the historical text, because I dont know if you know this but the concepts and ideals within it are historically accurate: Slave owners did pit lighter slaves against the darker ones and vice versa, they did do brutal things to one slave as a tool to keep the other slaves in line and set an example, they did weaken the wills of the black male slaves (they were afraid of a revolt), it was a trait of a "good slave owner" and a good business man to not abuse his slaves to the extent that they died or were seriously maimed because then they were no good as a product and resale value went down (thats basic economics people) etc. I can believe that if anything this letter might have been written by someone who is for the progression of black people in order to let us and others see the absurdity in some of the things African Americans do, HOWEVER we all have a choice in what we do and the things we associate ourselves with and just like in the case of people with stockholm syndrome (people end up adapting to a traumatic situation such as a kidnapping and sympathize with their captors) its harder for some people to come to terms with the reality of their situation so they adapt and I think that African Americans in this country have adapted to an ideology that certain things cannot be changed (this is a fact), it is also a fact that racist ideologies are a part of hegemonic systems such as the media that we base our values on and like I said the dominate ideology in America is an inherently racist one (this again is a fact).

It is important to realize that it is beneficial for African Americans to recognize and address these issues that come from the past and present treatment of African Americans so that they know that we truly cannot blame "whitey" anymore we must look at ourselves and what we are teaching our children and so on and challange that. If anyone would like to read a book because it doesnt seem like any of you are too informed about this subject please read "Gender,Race, and class in Media: A critical reader" edition 3 editors Gail and Jean M Humes (It has various authors because it is a series of essays and articles by respected social science scholars so you will have to look it up by the editors and title) I hope atleast someone learned something.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: big mama ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:30PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I would like to ask all the black women who claim
> they don't want black men, don't date black men,
> and have no intention of ever having anything to
> do with black men to answer these questions:
>
>
> Why do so many of you (and I'm only talking to the
> set of black women with these views) expound on
> black men not being leaders, not improving black
> women's condition, not being providers/protectors,
> and not being "real" men if you seemingly don't
> have any dealings with black men and don't want
> anything to do with them?
>
>
> How can you talk about black male leadership when
> you have, by your own words, opted out of such a
> thing?
>
>
> Why are you looking to black men to improve black
> women's condition if you have opted out of dealing
> with them?
>
>
> Why are you putting black men in the box of
> providers/protectors if you don't even deal with
> them?
>
>
> Why does it matter to you that black men aren't
> "real" men if you don't even deal with them?
>
>
> This is something I can understand someone like
> myself saying because I do indeed deal with black
> men. As frustrated as I get with black men, I do
> still in fact deal with them. But if you are a
> black woman who claims not to want anything to do
> with black men, why do you continue to expect
> these things of them???

"Why do so many of you (and I'm only talking to the set of black women with these views) expound on black men not being leaders, not improving black women's condition, not being providers/protectors, and not being "real" men if you seemingly don't have any dealings with black men and don't want anything to
do with them?"

Because children in my family are affected by it and it makes me sad for my baby cousins.And most importantly I hope some girl/woman or a tranny out there will see the writing and bypass black men altogether BEFORE a pregnancy,marriage,relationship etc. ever even occurs.
(As an aside and contrary to popular belief I say things about many black women too in regards to their parenting skills or lack thereof)

"Why are you looking to black men to improve black women's condition if you have opted out of dealing with them?"
I'm not.I think they should improve their children's lives and the women they are with.But I don't expect it from most of them. And if they never do the women who have children by them should still better themselves and the lives of those children.

I don't expect any black man,except my father and brother
(and only because I do for them), to do anything for ME at all.
I think it is foolish and wrong to do so.Black men are in no way responsible to help me with my career or livelihood in any way.(This is something that I did have to learn.At times I was made to feel responsible for male relatives,not by my momma or daddy but other family members,who weren't similarly concerned about my well being simply because they were "family")

Though I don't expect black men to do anything for me,I do expect them to do things against me.I fully expect for black men I don't know,that I come across in person, to do harm to me if given the chance whether through verbal or physical assault.

I also expect them to sabotage black women and girls in many other ways.Whether it's through talking negatively about black women to potential employers,joining up with the kkk/the tea party,and rapists and murderers of black women and girls etc.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: DF ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:31PM

I wasn't about to comment on this one as I think it's a question for women but I wanted to say I'm glad you asked those questions. I always wonder about people who want nothing to do with a group always criticizing them or pointing out what they do wrong. If you don't like someone it should be quite easy to not utter a word or have run ins with these folks. If you don't like Black Men I would guess you would move to a area where you wouldn't run into them right?

Sometimes I think the answer is right in front of everyone's face. I don't think they want to completely abandon Black Men they just are dishing out some tough love. Also, they are finding out that if they threaten to leave no one is chasing after their ass so it gets lonely out there.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: innovolater ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:33PM

what are the statistics concerning the financial divide among the so coalled 'black race' out of that particular 'race' of ppl , how many of them are well off? How many are while not well off, fairing pretty well for themselves? and how many are just down and out , struggling from day to day to keep food, clothing , and shelter a continuing possiblity? And among all of the so called 'black ppl' where does the greatest percentage of wealth lie among the blk males or females. What about poverty does it lie greater among the males or females, or is it equal? I think the financial state of any ppl that think money is required in order to have whatever , or whoever they want, is very crucial in how these ppl relate to one another. So the black males and females who are currently ostensibly not interested in mating/dating with each other, may based on the financial (as well as other seriously related factors) generalization?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: JF Publix ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:34PM

It is really getting old and trite. This believe that the majority of IR daters are educated, and well off. The majority of IR daters are broke and dumb.

The higher you go up the social ladder. The less IR dating you see for Black People. If you go to any ghetto or slum of any ethnic group. You will see a lot of mixed people.

I believe this is just another falsehood that is being pushed out onto Black people. Which is based on self hatred. Basically saying that Black people that have their ish together. They need to seek a non-black partner

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: layla ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:37PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I would like to ask all the black women who claim
> they don't want black men, don't date black men,
> and have no intention of ever having anything to
> do with black men to answer these questions:
>
>
> Why do so many of you (and I'm only talking to the
> set of black women with these views) expound on
> black men not being leaders, not improving black
> women's condition, not being providers/protectors,
> and not being "real" men if you seemingly don't
> have any dealings with black men and don't want
> anything to do with them?
>
>
> How can you talk about black male leadership when
> you have, by your own words, opted out of such a
> thing?
>
>
> Why are you looking to black men to improve black
> women's condition if you have opted out of dealing
> with them?
>
>
> Why are you putting black men in the box of
> providers/protectors if you don't even deal with
> them?
>
>
> Why does it matter to you that black men aren't
> "real" men if you don't even deal with them?
>
>
> This is something I can understand someone like
> myself saying because I do indeed deal with black
> men. As frustrated as I get with black men, I do
> still in fact deal with them. But if you are a
> black woman who claims not to want anything to do
> with black men, why do you continue to expect
> these things of them???

"So this has lead me to question what the hell do black women really mean when they say black women and children go the way of the men of the race?If they are talking about black men not taking care of their seed and making them wives I can understand."

I think that is what they mean,I guess.IDK

"If they are talking about RANDOM black men, who didn't have jack shit to do with the creation of their children (or the condition black women find themselves living), not taking responsibility for them in the larger sense of a community I don't understand."

I think I addressed this in my other comment but I do think that there are women who expect black men to be protectors and providers/helpers for random women.
I think it's about time they got over it.I have been disappointed before at the sight of watching a black male stand back while a black woman or girl is attacked by another black male but it's something everyone should get over for those who haven't.It would only benefit them.Black girls and women need to avoid hanging/being around black males period ,whenever they can help it.

Most of the women that I know of who speak that way are black nationalists who are "waiting for the black men to lead/step up".I also think that there are single women w/o children who help out random women and their children who don't feel it's fair that black men aren't doing anything.And it isn't but they don't have to do sh*t either.For all my troubles I've had with helping out relatives I knew that I could easily NOT do it but mostly feared what would happen to my baby cousins if I didn't.But I never let any community leader or anyone else make me feel a sense of obligation.And I was never angry at random black dudes for not doing right by my baby cousins just their "father" and mom for being with him.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:38PM

"I have been disappointed before at the sight of watching a black male stand back while a black woman or girl is attacked by another black male but it's something everyone should get over for those who haven't."

Don't you think this would depended on the situation? For example, I don't understand how a chick who picked an ex-con to have sex with and mate with can get mad when random black men don't step in to pull said ex-con off her ass when he becomes violent? Why should they risk their lives defending this woman who 9 times out of 10 won't even own up to the fact that she shouldn't have been fucking around with him anyway???

I especially have no sympathy for this "Good black men need to step up and defend black women at all cost" argument after the last post where SOME black women completely shifted their shitty choices in men on the faux black community encouraging them to pick those men.

Let me be clear on something: I am not down for my father, soon to be husband, or brothers jumping into some type of altercation between a violent ex-con and the foolish broad who was fucking him. I am not losing the black men I care about over some bullshit that could have been prevented if the woman had TAKEN RESPONSIBILITY FOR HER LIFE AND CHOICES and FOUND A BETTER MAN to take up with.

That woman would just have to get her ass beat if it depends on the men I care about sacrificing their lives for her dumbass.

Why the hell should black men step in to defend this chick who picked the low down kneegrow and who blames a non-existent third party for HER POOR CHOICES???

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: layla ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:44PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> "I have been disappointed before at the sight of
> watching a black male stand back while a black
> woman or girl is attacked by another black male
> but it's something everyone should get over for
> those who haven't."
>
> Don't you think this would depended on the
> situation? For example, I don't understand how a
> chick who picked an ex-con to have sex with and
> mate with can get mad when random black men don't
> step in to pull said ex-con off her ass when he
> becomes violent? Why should they risk their lives
> defending this woman who 9 times out of 10 won't
> even own up to the fact that she shouldn't have
> been fucking around with him anyway???
>
> I especially have no sympathy for this "Good black
> men need to step up and defend black women at all
> cost" argument after the last post where SOME
> black women completely shifted their shitty
> choices in men on the faux black community
> encouraging them to pick those men.
>
> Let me be clear on something: I am not down for my
> father, soon to be husband, or brothers jumping
> into some type of altercation between a violent
> ex-con and the foolish broad who was fucking him.
> I am not losing the black men I care about over
> some bullshit that could have been prevented if
> the woman had TAKEN RESPONSIBILITY FOR HER LIFE
> AND CHOICES and FOUND A BETTER MAN to take up
> with.
>
> That woman would just have to get her ass beat if
> it depends on the men I care about sacrificing
> their lives for her dumbass.
>
> Why the hell should black men step in to defend
> this chick who picked the low down kneegrow and
> who blames a non-existent third party for HER POOR
> CHOICES???

"Don't you think this would depended on the situation?
For example, I don't understand how a chick who picked an ex-con to have sex with and mate with can get mad when random black men don't step in to pull said ex-con off her ass when he becomes violent?"

Yeah it depends on the situation.But how would random black men know all that?
Plus do random black men believe in walking around the corner and calling the cops or snitching?Or do they say fugg it she must've deserved it.

"Let me be clear on something: I am not down for my father, soon to be husband, or brothers jumping into some type of altercation between a violent ex-con and the foolish broad who was fucking him."Okay, I definitely feel you on that.I just hope they would call the police and wouldn't sit back and watch.But they aren't obligated to do so

"a non-existent third party for HER POOR CHOICES???"
Only except sometimes these third parties DO exist and in the flesh.Nightline:"Harper argued that black woman need to date men who show potential, despite their not necessarily having reached it yet."I'm very excited and I think it's going to be pretty lively," said Harper. "We're talking about relationships and we're talking about what's going on in the community and a lot of the things that are in my book."

He also said they should date ex cons.It is up to them to take the advice or not and many of them will listen to Hill and his ilk,they're programmed to do so, to their own detriment.Hopefully they'll snap out of it before it's too late.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ebony999 ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:51PM

I found this tidbit from an online article from 2002. Doesnt look like much changed?

Why I prefer to date White Women (Evening Standard, Fri 1 November, 2002)
by David Matthews

About half of black men in Britain are in interracial relationships. One writer explores the reasons which run deeper than skin colour

BBC2's new series of Babyfather spells bad news for black men. Apart from rehashing the same old racial stereotypes (we're still flaky, can't commit, etc), the show's subplot about a relationship between one of the protagonists and a white woman is guaranteed to make life extremely uncomfortable for cosmopolitans everywhere. Especially me.

As a 35-year-old black man who has been sexually active for almost 20 years, it's fair to say I've dated more than my fair share of white women. I was married to one, had a child with another, and am now dating a woman who has red hair and happens to be Jewish. The majority of my long-term relationships have been with white women.

I'll probably get lynched by black women for writing about why, over the years, I've dated so many white females, but here goes. I've heard every cliche there is on the subject and have been accused of "selling out" enough times to have the strength of character to define myself by who I am, not who I choose to sleep with.

Do I have an unhealthy predilection for white flesh; do I have I have identity issues; am I ashamed of my "race"; or am I on the make (as a struggling author and because of the media circles I move in, most of the women I meet are well-heeled professionals)? None of the above. But as a black man living in a predominantly white environment, what am I supposed to do, don a bow tie, flog The Final Call outside Brixton Tube and build myself a mud hut in order to "keep it real"?

Black women in particular give me a hard time when they see me out with my white girlfriend. On the rare occasions that I have been to a black event with a white woman on my arm, I have felt tension, and had some dismissive looks. They accuse me of acting like a Premiership footballer just because I've had one or two blonde girlfriends.

They tell me I've "got a thing for white girls" because they're an "easy ride". Believe me, no woman is an easy ride, but I have to admit there is a grain of truth in this statement. Black women do tend to give us a hard time.

When I have dated black women, I've been dumped for demonstrating a lack of "consciousness" - ie, I don't hate white people enough and I've had my advances spurned by numerous headwrap-wearing "black sisters" after admitting to "tupping the white ewe", as Iago put it in Othello.

Black men are usually a lot less critical of interracial relationships, mainly because at any given moment 50 per cent of them are in one.

I'm often asked why so many of us date white women. Undoubtedly there are those who have a preference for white women, much as they might have a fetish for tall women, or busty ones. White women are as exotic to black men as say Asian or oriental women are to white men. But I cite approachability as a factor when it comes to why I date white women. They just don't have as many hang-ups.

Despite the bump-and-grind sexual posturing of innumerable hip-hop videos, which portray black women as living, breathing sex toys, they tend to be conservative and surprisingly old-fashioned.

White women are reaping the benefits of the feminist movement far more then their black peers - they appear to have a greater freedom and control over their sexuality. Black women, specifically Afro-Caribbean ones, good Christian girls that they are, are pretty strait-laced when it comes to sex.

They expect you to pick them up, pay for dinner, and drop them off at the front door with no more than a peck on the cheek. Whereas white women are often more daring, adventurous and self assured in the bedroom.

THIS conservatism also extends to the dating ritual. Most of the black women I come into contact with are obsessed with how much money you earn; they have bought into the American claptrap spouted by the likes of Destiny's Child in Independent Woman. Most black men find they have to jump through burning hoops to get with a black woman. If you ain't got the car, the yard, the career, the bling-bling then don't think about asking me out.

Of course, there is a tradition of black women being financially responsible: they are often the sole or main breadwinner, perhaps because black men don't always get the career breaks that they do. Black women tend to buy into the propaganda that portrays us as being useless, and don't always cut us a lot of slack.

Judging by this week's episode of Babyfather, the BBC has no problem reinforcing the stereotype that black women are demanding, confrontational and belligerent. I asked a white colleague (who's never dated a black woman) what he thought of them.

His impression (doubtless based on crud like Babyfather) was that they are "scary". There is some truth in this image; I wish they would chill out a bit. I was going out with a black woman for a couple of months, and she asked me what my intentions were; now that is truly scary. <---Von: HUGE What THE FUCK? Red Flag!

Going out with a white woman isn't, for me, some kind of trendy boho fashion statement. When I had a daughter with a white woman,it brought home to me the consequences of my actions: that I had brought a child into a world that is far from reconciling its racial and cultural differences.

Perhaps when my daughter is my age she'll have other, less daunting moral imperatives to deal with.

>ebony999

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:51PM

layla Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Von Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > "I have been disappointed before at the sight
> of
> > watching a black male stand back while a black
> > woman or girl is attacked by another black male
> > but it's something everyone should get over for
> > those who haven't."
> >
> > Don't you think this would depended on the
> > situation? For example, I don't understand how
> a
> > chick who picked an ex-con to have sex with and
> > mate with can get mad when random black men
> don't
> > step in to pull said ex-con off her ass when he
> > becomes violent? Why should they risk their
> lives
> > defending this woman who 9 times out of 10
> won't
> > even own up to the fact that she shouldn't have
> > been fucking around with him anyway???
> >
> > I especially have no sympathy for this "Good
> black
> > men need to step up and defend black women at
> all
> > cost" argument after the last post where SOME
> > black women completely shifted their shitty
> > choices in men on the faux black community
> > encouraging them to pick those men.
> >
> > Let me be clear on something: I am not down for
> my
> > father, soon to be husband, or brothers jumping
> > into some type of altercation between a violent
> > ex-con and the foolish broad who was fucking
> him.
> > I am not losing the black men I care about over
> > some bullshit that could have been prevented if
> > the woman had TAKEN RESPONSIBILITY FOR HER LIFE
> > AND CHOICES and FOUND A BETTER MAN to take up
> > with.
> >
> > That woman would just have to get her ass beat
> if
> > it depends on the men I care about sacrificing
> > their lives for her dumbass.
> >
> > Why the hell should black men step in to defend
> > this chick who picked the low down kneegrow and
> > who blames a non-existent third party for HER
> POOR
> > CHOICES???
>
> "Don't you think this would depended on the
> situation?
> For example, I don't understand how a chick who
> picked an ex-con to have sex with and mate with
> can get mad when random black men don't step in to
> pull said ex-con off her ass when he becomes
> violent?"
>
> Yeah it depends on the situation.But how would
> random black men know all that?
> Plus do random black men believe in walking around
> the corner and calling the cops or snitching?Or do
> they say fugg it she must've deserved it.
>
> "Let me be clear on something: I am not down for
> my father, soon to be husband, or brothers jumping
> into some type of altercation between a violent
> ex-con and the foolish broad who was fucking
> him."Okay, I definitely feel you on that.I just
> hope they would call the police and wouldn't sit
> back and watch.But they aren't obligated to do so
>
> "a non-existent third party for HER POOR
> CHOICES???"
> Only except sometimes these third parties DO exist
> and in the flesh.Nightline:"Harper argued that
> black woman need to date men who show potential,
> despite their not necessarily having reached it
> yet."I'm very excited and I think it's going to be
> pretty lively," said Harper. "We're talking about
> relationships and we're talking about what's going
> on in the community and a lot of the things that
> are in my book."
>
> He also said they should date ex cons.It is up to
> them to take the advice or not and many of them
> will listen to Hill and his ilk,they're programmed
> to do so, to their own detriment.Hopefully they'll
> snap out of it before it's too late.


"Yeah it depends on the situation.But how would random black men know all that? Plus do random black men believe in walking around the corner and calling the cops or snitching?Or do they say fugg it she must've deserved it."

Often times his appearance is a dead giveaway. I think most people operate under the, "If it looks like a duck..." motto. Like I said on the other post there is NO way Pookie can be mistaken for a gentleman. That is the TRUTH.

I believe most decent people would call the police. However, I don't believe many would jump into someone else's bullshit (and depending on the situation...rightly so).

"Only except sometimes these third parties DO exist and in the flesh.Nightline:"Harper argued that black woman need to date men who show potential, despite their not necessarily having reached it yet."

And this is telling black women to date Pookie in your book? Again he is NOT talking about the Pookie set when he makes remarks like this...good grief.

POTENTIAL DOES NOT EQUAL POOKIE. THE TWO ARE NOT SYNONYMOUS WITH EACH OTHER. In fact they are on complete opposite ends of the spectrum.

"He also said they should date ex cons.It is up to them to take the advice or not and many of them will listen to Hill and his ilk,they're programmed to do so, to their own detriment.Hopefully they'll snap out of it before it's too late."

No he didn't I watched the program in question and he DID NOT once say this and if you can prove otherwise CITE a quote from a RELIABLE source.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: msthang ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:56PM

Von Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This is what I don't understand:
>
> Black women assert that black women and children
> go the way of the men of the race. I don't
> necessarily think I agree with this idea here in
> America.
>
> Africa? Yes. Here in the USA? NO.
>
> Why?
>
> Because we are LIBERATED women which means we no
> longer have to follow a man. It is OPTIONAL now
> and many black women through their own words (ex.
> I don't need or want a man...specifically a black
> man) have opted NOT to follow black men.
>
> So this has lead me to question (and it happened
> within the last two blog post stemming from a
> comment to a man who frequents my blog) what the
> hell do black women really mean when they say
> black women and children go the way of the men of
> the race?
>
> If they are talking about black men not taking
> care of their seed and making them wives I can
> understand.
>
> If they are talking about RANDOM black men, who
> didn't have jack shit to do with the creation of
> their children (or the condition black women find
> themselves living), not taking responsibility for
> them in the larger sense of a community I don't
> understand.
>
> We have already said their really isn't such a
> thing as a black community. Why continue to expect
> this sense of community where none exist and why
> continue to view yourselves as black men's
> disregarded laundry when you have the ability to
> FULLY determine your own destiny?

"We have already said their really isn't such a thing as a black community. Why continue to expect this sense of community where none exist and why continue to view yourselves as black men's disregarded laundry when you have the ability to FULLY determine your own destiny?"

EXCELLENT STATEMENT!!! TWO THUMBS WAY UP!! Our destinies do not have to be intertwined with black men.

Furthermore I think I should be more clear when speaking of the black community.I myself have uttered the words "black community" when I meant "black residential areas" or " the majority of the black collective in this country" or "black mainstream group think".It makes all the difference in the world when trying to make a point.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: layla ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:56PM

"No he didn't I watched the program in question and he DID not once say this and if you can prove otherwise CITE a quote from a RELIABLE source."

Couldn't find any quotes from him on this.I mostly heard it from word of mouth because I refused to watch that sh*t but if he didn't I stand corrected and can point you to several others,black men and black women, who have if you'd like.Which is why when I was told that about him I definitely believed he did.Either way the message is still being sent.Plus,how does someone who isn't even dating black women giving advice to black men/black women about how to get with eachother.He hasn't even mastered that himself but I digress

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: chocolate_mama ()
Date: June 19, 2011 07:58PM

Women like layla are as delusional as the black men she claims to hate. Because anyone who ascribes only negative qualities to any one group is delusional. She may as well join the KKK

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: E.C. Carver ()
Date: June 19, 2011 08:01PM

ebony999 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I found this tidbit from an online article from
> 2002. Doesnt look like much changed?
>
> Why I prefer to date White Women (Evening
> Standard, Fri 1 November, 2002)
> by David Matthews
>
> About half of black men in Britain are in
> interracial relationships. One writer explores the
> reasons which run deeper than skin colour
>
> BBC2's new series of Babyfather spells bad news
> for black men. Apart from rehashing the same old
> racial stereotypes (we're still flaky, can't
> commit, etc), the show's subplot about a
> relationship between one of the protagonists and a
> white woman is guaranteed to make life extremely
> uncomfortable for cosmopolitans everywhere.
> Especially me.
>
> As a 35-year-old black man who has been sexually
> active for almost 20 years, it's fair to say I've
> dated more than my fair share of white women. I
> was married to one, had a child with another, and
> am now dating a woman who has red hair and happens
> to be Jewish. The majority of my long-term
> relationships have been with white women.
>
> I'll probably get lynched by black women for
> writing about why, over the years, I've dated so
> many white females, but here goes. I've heard
> every cliche there is on the subject and have been
> accused of "selling out" enough times to have the
> strength of character to define myself by who I
> am, not who I choose to sleep with.
>
> Do I have an unhealthy predilection for white
> flesh; do I have I have identity issues; am I
> ashamed of my "race"; or am I on the make (as a
> struggling author and because of the media circles
> I move in, most of the women I meet are
> well-heeled professionals)? None of the above. But
> as a black man living in a predominantly white
> environment, what am I supposed to do, don a bow
> tie, flog The Final Call outside Brixton Tube and
> build myself a mud hut in order to "keep it real"?
>
>
> Black women in particular give me a hard time when
> they see me out with my white girlfriend. On the
> rare occasions that I have been to a black event
> with a white woman on my arm, I have felt tension,
> and had some dismissive looks. They accuse me of
> acting like a Premiership footballer just because
> I've had one or two blonde girlfriends.
>
> They tell me I've "got a thing for white girls"
> because they're an "easy ride". Believe me, no
> woman is an easy ride, but I have to admit there
> is a grain of truth in this statement. Black women
> do tend to give us a hard time.
>
> When I have dated black women, I've been dumped
> for demonstrating a lack of "consciousness" - ie,
> I don't hate white people enough and I've had my
> advances spurned by numerous headwrap-wearing
> "black sisters" after admitting to "tupping the
> white ewe", as Iago put it in Othello.
>
> Black men are usually a lot less critical of
> interracial relationships, mainly because at any
> given moment 50 per cent of them are in one.
>
> I'm often asked why so many of us date white
> women. Undoubtedly there are those who have a
> preference for white women, much as they might
> have a fetish for tall women, or busty ones. White
> women are as exotic to black men as say Asian or
> oriental women are to white men. But I cite
> approachability as a factor when it comes to why I
> date white women. They just don't have as many
> hang-ups.
>
> Despite the bump-and-grind sexual posturing of
> innumerable hip-hop videos, which portray black
> women as living, breathing sex toys, they tend to
> be conservative and surprisingly old-fashioned.
>
> White women are reaping the benefits of the
> feminist movement far more then their black peers
> - they appear to have a greater freedom and
> control over their sexuality. Black women,
> specifically Afro-Caribbean ones, good Christian
> girls that they are, are pretty strait-laced when
> it comes to sex.
>
> They expect you to pick them up, pay for dinner,
> and drop them off at the front door with no more
> than a peck on the cheek. Whereas white women are
> often more daring, adventurous and self assured in
> the bedroom.
>
> THIS conservatism also extends to the dating
> ritual. Most of the black women I come into
> contact with are obsessed with how much money you
> earn; they have bought into the American claptrap
> spouted by the likes of Destiny's Child in
> Independent Woman. Most black men find they have
> to jump through burning hoops to get with a black
> woman. If you ain't got the car, the yard, the
> career, the bling-bling then don't think about
> asking me out.
>
> Of course, there is a tradition of black women
> being financially responsible: they are often the
> sole or main breadwinner, perhaps because black
> men don't always get the career breaks that they
> do. Black women tend to buy into the propaganda
> that portrays us as being useless, and don't
> always cut us a lot of slack.
>
> Judging by this week's episode of Babyfather, the
> BBC has no problem reinforcing the stereotype that
> black women are demanding, confrontational and
> belligerent. I asked a white colleague (who's
> never dated a black woman) what he thought of
> them.
>
> His impression (doubtless based on crud like
> Babyfather) was that they are "scary". There is
> some truth in this image; I wish they would chill
> out a bit. I was going out with a black woman for
> a couple of months, and she asked me what my
> intentions were; now that is truly scary. <---Von:
> HUGE What THE FUCK? Red Flag!
>
> Going out with a white woman isn't, for me, some
> kind of trendy boho fashion statement. When I had
> a daughter with a white woman,it brought home to
> me the consequences of my actions: that I had
> brought a child into a world that is far from
> reconciling its racial and cultural differences.
>
>
> Perhaps when my daughter is my age she'll have
> other, less daunting moral imperatives to deal
> with.
>
> >ebony999

ebony999: Sigh...A few things wrong here...


1). Notice in this entire article the author doesn't ONCE mention his love for white women. In fact, he does what many in this group tend to do, which is run off a list of black women's flaws to justify dating outside his race. Then he even admits that white women are easy. Recall I asked a while ago if black men/non-black women's relationships could just be about the love (HERE). I even defended the notion. But this man, and men like him, successfully manage to prove me wrong.

2). Black women's sexuality: This author is being dishonest in his assessment of black women's sexuality versus that of white women. The fact is BLACK WOMEN are judged MORE HARSHLY in this society and in the FAUX BLACK COMMUNITY for expressing their sexuality. This has ALWAYS been the case. Unlike white women, there are STEREOTYPES associated with black women and our sexuality. A white woman is forgiven for being a whore...the same is not true for black women. To expect black women to ignore this REAL double standard for the sake of not looking like a prude or to keep black men happy just shows how much of a disconnect there is between black men and black women. Of all the people in the world you would think a black man would understand this issue.

3). The author believes black women are too demanding of black men yet there are a lot of vocal dumbass black men walking around blaming black women for not being demanding enough on black men in order for black men to pursue education and have things that us NORMAL rational people just have...such as MORALS. Black women cannot win with black men. If a chick dates a subpar man she is blamed for making a bad choice. If a chick demands that a black man have a job, car, house and all the other NORMAL SHIT that other races of men have/get she is accused of being too demanding. I say FUCK IT! Black women have the right idea. Bypass any kneegrow that has a problem with you demanding that he have something to show for his life as a grown ass man. And to think!...this man has the nerve to rant about black women believing that black men are useless. GTFOOH!

4). And the most damning part of this article for me is this: "I was going out with a black woman for a couple of months, and she asked me what my intentions were; now that is truly scary." Okay so a black woman asked him to lay his cards out on the table (no doubt to see if they are moving in the same direction, and to avoid being used) and this kneegrow experiences fear?!? What's wrong with this picture? Would he have experienced the same anxiety had a WHITE woman asked this of him? I highly doubt it. This man seems to have a problem with black women demanding that he actually court them!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Funny_Guy ()
Date: June 19, 2011 08:13PM

Here's the real reason why Black Guys go after white women.
Attachments:
W88x32.jpg

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: rjmilton ()
Date: June 19, 2011 08:15PM

Is a White man no longer White when he marries an Asian woman or a Black one? Are his cultural opinions deemed irrelevant or expanded by this?

This mentality of being Black enough in the Black culture is venomous AND regressive (seeing as most of our people don't know our history now). Rather than accept knowledge for knowledge we arbitrarily critique, when we have nothing left to. Obama got some of that backlash regardless of his accomplishments and having a Black wife for "not being Black ENOUGH". That's a joke

As a Black man (and no I'm not married to a white woman or at all for that matter) but as a Black man I'm certain much of our culture is looking for things to blame our plight on rather than fixing said problems. The massive amount of single Black moms is not directly connected to white women. There are a ton of single White moms with mulatto/Black kids here in Canada.

Either way if we don't have the right to chose we don't have anything. I personally would love to meet a marry a Black girl. There is no but. To that. I've dated everything under the sun though. It's pretty fair to say Black men don't Date Black women in my town. Even at the highschools you see the couples are interracial.

Anyway I could've simply said I don't fully agree with you. But I see where you're coming from. So I hope shed some light on my opinion.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Von ()
Date: June 19, 2011 08:25PM

I was debating whether or not I should post this, but after today talking to various black lady friends I felt I had to. Any black man reading this post is welcome to write a counterargument. ***Note- the following are things that I've heard from black women throughout the course of my life. I've heard all of the following on more than one occasion from various black women.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ten Reasons Why Black Women Have Grown or Are Growing Not To Care About Black Men Dating/Marrying Other Races.

1. The black man's devaluing and disrespect of the black woman has led to many black women viewing black men as villains, a burden to them and society and a liability rather than as a best-friend, father, husband, and ally.

2. Black men have proven themselves to be complete failures on so many levels...the main level being fatherhood. Being a parent is suppose to be the most important "job" that one can have, but instead of embracing the role and responsibility black men choose to run in the opposite direction. This leaves black women to play the dual role of mother and father.

3. Many Black men have adopted a "baby boy" type mentality. They expect black women to "mother" them and cater to them the way a mother would. Their expectations are too high for any woman and ridiculous to say the least. This type of black man needs to be pushed to do the simple things that come easy to other races of men. Example: Most men like to set off on their own at some point early in life...however, these type of men need to be pushed to move the hell out of their parent's house.

4. Black men don't value their bodies or they're minds. While black women are reaching higher and higher in terms of higher education black men are regressing and falling further and further behind. As far as their bodies are concern, black men don't comprehend the concept of safe sex. They are constantly putting their bodies on the line with unprotected sex and passing the shit on to black women....or other black men for that matter.

5. Black men don't believe in monogamy. Often black men have more than one black woman at a time and are responsible for fathering several out of wedlock children by several different women. Example: Lil Wayne...shaking my damn head!

6. Black men often want black women to look pass their flaws (unemployment, low wages, street life activities), but rarely do black men look pass the flaws of black women. Often black women are made to feel they are inferior to other races of women due to black men constantly nagging and comparing them to other races or women. This is where the black man's love for a "European" standard of beauty comes into play.

7. Black men don't know the meaning of romance. Trying to get a date beyond McDonald's or an all you can eat buffet is hard for a black woman. Often black men will make it very clear that her trip with him anywhere comes at a price therefore she better be ready to spread those legs later.

8. Black men have successfully damaged their image. Gold teeth, sagging pants, and white tees have become the dress code for too many. It's embarrassing to be seen in public with these individuals. Black women often find themselves having to tell black men how to dress. It's not just the so-called thugs either....very often black nerds lack any since of style and self-worth.

9. Black men are not ambitious enough. It's hard to find a black man today who wants to be a doctor or a lawyer. Many black men only think about sports and entertainment both of which are LONG shots in terms of a career. A large number of black women are ambitious and take the common sense approach of going to college so there tends to be a clash here.

10. Black men are easily misled. Black men have done more damage to the black community than any white man could ever do by selling drugs to the community. Though they are quick to point out the fact that white men are importing the drugs into the country rarely do they acknowledge the fact that the white man isn't forcing them to sell it to their own people.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: PReed ()
Date: June 19, 2011 09:12PM

Don Lemon is gay.

The media, both social and mainstream, have been all atwitter since the CNN anchor made this announcement via Twitter this weekend. This as his memoir, Transparent is being released this week.

Lemon and his book were the subject of a Sunday New York Times feature, in which "he said he believed the negative reaction to male homosexuality had to do with the history of discrimination that still affects many black Americans, as well as the attitudes of some black women."

And he didn't stop there. Lemon continued, "You're afraid that black women will say the same things they do about how black men should be dating black women."

This fallacious statement hit me like the proverbial ton of bricks. I immediately posted the story on my Facebook page and I have engaged in a dialogue with others on the social media network. Some agree with me that Lemon is unfairly stereotyping Black women. Others believe that we should give him the benefit of doubt because some Black women do tend to criticize Black men who partner with men and/or women of other races.

Moreover, many opine, he should be applauded for having the courage to go public about his sexuality. One person pointed out that heterosexual people are not faced with such dilemmas.

Admittedly, I am straight...and I cannot know what it means to be gay. But I do know what it means to be Black and female. And I wouldn't trade it for all the oil in Africa...but as Langston Hughes wrote in "Mother to Son": "Life for me ain't been no crystal stair." Nor has/is it for most Black women, I'm sure.

In this regard, I think Zora Neale Hurston captured it best when she wrote the following in her opus, Their Eyes Were Watching God.
So de white man throw down de load and tell de nigger man tuh pick it up. He pick it up because he have to, but he don't tote it. He hand it to his women folks. De nigger woman is de mule oh de world as fur as Ah can see.
And "as fur as Ah can see," ain't nothing changed since Hurston wrote this profundity.

That's why Don Lemon's words have struck such a nerve with me. As a Black woman, I have grown tired of some (and I emphasize, some) Black men "dissing" Black women, without whom, one could argue, our race would be totally lost.

Now. With regard to the Black man/White woman thing. It is true that many Black women lament this growing trend...but not to the point of trying to professionally hurt those Black men who date interracially.


Even when Black men make hateful declarations about not dating Black women, as did the Washington Redskin who recently offered the fact that he doesn't "even like Black women" as his defense against a sexual harassment charge levied by an African American waitress.

"She is just upset I have a white girlfriend. I couldn't tell you the last time I dated a black girl. She was trying to get with me," he reportedly told detectives.


But back to Don Lemon. Here's a news flash for the news man: Many of us already knew (or at least suspected) that he is gay! It is as clear as day. And most could not care less. Certainly, it hasn't stopped the vast majority of Black women from loving him as an on-air personality.

So, to whom exactly is he "coming out"?

Whatever the case, his "coming out," such as it is, is not likely to hurt him professionally. It certainly hasn't hurt the Pulitzer Prize-winning Washington Post editorial board member and columnist Jonathan Capehart, who is openly gay--and an MSNBC contributor.

And lets face it, the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender (LGBT) lobby is among the most powerful in this country. In fact, I predict that his revelation and his controversial comments will propel his book to bestseller status. And perhaps that is the point.

But this is not to say that homophobia is not a very real societal problem; however, I really think the Black community gets a bum rap with this charge that we are somehow more homophobic than American society at large.

Admittedly, it is true that in some parts of Africa and the West Indies, it is not safe to be openly gay. And truth be told, in America, homophobia is a societal ill. But, it is not just a Black thing...and certainly it is not Black women who are the oppressors (for lack of a better word) of gay Black men, which--if the Times quote is to be believed--is what Lemon implies in his comment.

Which brings me back to my original point: Don Lemon can lead whatever life he chooses, but why make this about Black women's alleged prejudice? After all, many Black women claim gay men as BFF's. Indeed, two of my best friends ever, now deceased, were gay Black men.

Moreover, gay Black men are our brothers, our sons, our nephews, our uncles, our cousins...our fathers. Gay Black men "whip" our hair, "beat" our collective face, keep our secrets, boost our morale, teach our children...and us. Gay Black men minister to us, defend us, entertain us, protect us, provide for us...and love us.

So...Nope. I, for one, am just not buying it. I understand Don's concerns about homophobia, but there is just no justifiable reason for singling out Black women in this regard.

The undeniable truth is that Black men, gay or otherwise, are a part of us....and Black women are not the enemy.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: blkcouga ()
Date: June 19, 2011 11:07PM

Von-

when bm hate bw...it is NOT SELF HATE. they don't hate bm which would be SELF hatred...they hate bw. we are NOT in this together and haven't been for quite some time. i think as soon as more bw grasp this truth, the better off more will be. there are a great many bm that truly devalue, hold great contempt and hate bw. some are even married to bw. those that are with bw typically NEED two incomes and she had better go earn hers. in quite a few cases, she is OUT earning him!

you asked in another post, why i care when i have long moved on from dating bm. the answer is- i am still a bw. i have sisters, nieces and other black folks that i love. this love will not allow me to stand in silence when so many obviously need to clue up.

this article bore no revelations for me. i have silently listened as knuckleheads spewed this same mess to my face. or indicated they didn't normally date bw but would date me. (as i quietly thought what an idiot lie he was. i don't date bm that don't date bw. lol. of course, i didn't feel compelled to share so i just smiled and kept it moving.)

personally, i don't care WHAT the many excuses/lies/reasons are for the devaluing of bw. may every non blk woman that looks at the conditions of bw and blk children and thinks to herself that she is special and will somehow fare better...GET SOME. there is an upside to EVERYTHING. may more bw take this attitude and STOP driving up bm's stock by foolishly getting angry or trying to feel some way about him being with another color woman. women only want what they think others want. lol. it tickles me personally, to see the annoyance when i smile and tell these couples searching my face for some kind of reaction that they make a cute couple. lol.

there is one thing that quite a few bm and bw have in common...they LOVE bm. i still encounter bw that know good and well its a wrap on the so called "black love" that will cruise control themselves into the protective, providing excuses party lines. i wish them the best on stupid where they are patheticly stuck. there is no "disconnect" between bm and bw. there is a plain and simple matter of vast numbers of bm just not giving a damn about bw or the babies they participate in making with the women foolish enough to hold still to receive them...and carry them to term.

bw, in large numbers, STILL haven't grasped the truth that bm's babies are a BAD INVESTMENT. (this is in reference to your last post) bm's babies are the LEAST provided for and protected. the mothers of bm's babies are in large numbers NOT experiencing the BLESSINGS of motherhood. they are instead toiling under BURDENS that improperly provided for children become. those smart bw, the ones that understand they should be MARRIED BEFORE having children GET THIS TRUTH. THIS is why THEY are NOT popping out bm baby after bm baby, while even married, like the stupid bw are single.. i will go a step further and say MARRIED bw are NOT experiencing the provision and protection marriage should bring either. they seem to know all too well their precarious situation and are NOT making a grip of babies to be saddled with should homeboy decide to run away from home or do something that will make her staying impossible or pull a Steve McNair or... (which folks with eyes should be able to see is a pattern by now.)

Von, it occurred to me that you seem to still be in the mourning stage of realizing that the jig is up. once that has passed, there is no anger or other great emotion attached to watching the mess go down. for me, there has only been an unflinching resolve to call it and let the chips fall where they may. IF one girl or lost bw finds a clue in my words, i count it all joy. this i say as a reformed black nationalist, power to the people, fight white hegemony, fist raised, dark chocolate sister. lol. and most of the "brothers" that could describe themselves in the same manner had...a white woman. lol. yep, i said it. lol

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: slubdawg ()
Date: June 20, 2011 09:45AM

craven moorehead Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> real reason Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Black men do not have good examples of a
> "decent"
> > father. Black women show their male children
> that
> > is is OK not to be a decent father by allowing
> > different men to father the mothers children.
> Why
> > do you think black women have four kids to four
> > different men a couple years apart from each
> > other? Black boys are a product of thier
> > enviorment.
>
>
> I am not racist but I have found that the vast
> majority of black girls smell really bad and I
> feel that having sex with a black girl would be
> like doing it with an animal. I work with a few
> black ladies and they are nice and I help them out
> sometimes but I would not want to eat lunch with
> them because of the smell. Just being honest- not
> racist.


I've read a lot of stupid comments (and I'm sure I've posted some) on this board but if this poster really believes what he says, then he is an idiot! I'm an older, quite a bit older, white guy. I had a black girlfriend at one time, years ago, and she was pretty much like any other girlfriend I had. She wasn't as into oral sex as some, but wasn't opposed to it, and I loved providing it. She had some other characteristics that made up for it though. We didn't break up over any racial issue.

Attitude is the biggest issue with any woman!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ProVallone ()
Date: June 20, 2011 03:26PM

OJ tried marrying within his own race, but apparently he could not resist the lure of the white prize.
Problem is, when he got his white woman, he cut her head off.
So does that say that black men don't marry black women because the negro babes won't take the abuse that the white wimmins do?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: hoocoodanode ()
Date: June 20, 2011 03:47PM

ProVallone Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> OJ tried marrying within his own race, but
> apparently he could not resist the lure of the
> white prize.
> Problem is, when he got his white woman, he cut
> her head off.
> So does that say that black men don't marry black
> women because the negro babes won't take the abuse
> that the white wimmins do?

Nope. It says OJ is a murdering punk.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Mr. Misery ()
Date: June 22, 2011 12:58AM

the jig is up, hoocoodanode. We all know you're black.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Mr. Misery ()
Date: June 22, 2011 12:58AM

I said "JIG"! "JIG"!!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: WHiTEY's ()
Date: June 26, 2011 09:34AM

I have to hand it to black men then, no one in their right mind would EVER marry a black nigger woman. That's akin to marrying a wild animal in my book with all the smell to go along with it. Niggers are so stupid anyway, so fuck 'em all!


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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: donkeylips ()
Date: June 28, 2011 01:04AM

11. They don't wash there hair

12. They don't shave there arm pits

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ITISWRITTEN ()
Date: November 07, 2011 08:39PM

OOOOh.... WHIteY's-Did your wife run off with the help? Poor thang-CAC's mean Cracker ass Crackers yall motherfuckers kill me, how in the hell are you (a white motherfucker) going to say niggers stink. Bitches have yall smelled yourself wet fucking dogs-and it fits the description. I don't give a fuck about what a nigger or cracker says about blacks. Crackers' problems are you scared little bitches--you know a nigga will flatten your asses out; that goes for you-your momma-your incestual ass daddy-that will always want to fuck a black woman. Don't let your ignorant born disibilities right a check your lice-infested, moldy motherfucking asses, smelling like a fucking Chow. Bitch please-FUck anymotherfucker that don't like Black males or Black females; you aint shit anyway.
Mother had you, Mother loved you, Mother fuckyou
PEACE BITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Yucky24. ()
Date: November 08, 2011 02:49AM

I like how you nigs are acting like it's up to you.

Niggers are losers.

They have the lowest IQs in the world (scientific fact), they flunk out of school at chronic rates, they can't get a job or start their own business, they're addicted to drugs, the only way they can bring in any income is to become a criminal or to pray they get some kind of affirmative action job, they're immature because they lack intelligence and civility, that means they make terrible partners/fathers, and they're always trying to compensate for their genetic failures.

It's the nigger ape females who want nothing to do with you.



The only thing the nigs have going for them is the myth that they all have 3 foot dongs.

And it's we superior White Men who refuse to date black females because:

1) They're ugly as fuck.

2) They're retarded as fuck.

3) They're annoying as fuck.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Hairy TurtIe ()
Date: November 08, 2011 03:44AM

i think the person above me was raped by a black man while a black woman laughed and cheered on. so much pent up anger towards the blacks. GOSH

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: EIi 2 ()
Date: November 08, 2011 03:47AM

so what if he was? is that funny to you turd?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: IHATERACISTHONKEES ()
Date: May 06, 2012 07:29PM

It's very funny, honkie. ^^^

Especially considering how racist whites fantasize about black people as much as they do. They have a pent-up sexual issues that they put on black people because they feel the sex is more intense and more pleasurable.

As for sellout black men, they live by their dicks and the many non-black conquests they can get. The out of wedlock kids suffer the most because most black men run from responsibilities and the mother'sworld is turned upside down because she thought for sure her non-black pussy would change him. LOLOLOL! When they get with white women, they demand the white woman respect them to the point that she has to be reminded daily to do so by way of verbal thrashings or some slapping around.

He'd be DEAD if he tried that with a black woman.

That's a sad existence. Black women are better off chucking their deuces and heading for greener pastures. Let the non-black women deal with their dumb asses.

Oh and FYI: non-black men are no better, as most of them are cowards and worry too much about what others think. In that respect, all men have dicks, thus making them all the same, really.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ^^^ ()
Date: May 06, 2012 11:40PM

To the poster above, hey, I know how to stop out of wedlock children! How about black women stop having pre-marital sex! Or how about black women take the steps to, I don't know, not get pregnant! Although this goes for all women. But it is a serious issue amongst blacks, don't blame the deadbeat dads, don't get pregnant ladies.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Teri Ashworth ()
Date: May 29, 2012 05:17PM

Thank you for your remarkable, thoughtful, and intelligent posting regarding the plight of a black woman. It’s easy to label a black woman as a rude, loud, ghetto fabulous gold digger without looking at the cause and effect of her actions. With black men being so irresponsible in their responsibilities to their family, woman, and children it’s no wondering that black woman haven’t completely broken into former shells of theirselves .Tell you want when the black man starts to treat his prized white, Asian, other whatever else non-black woman he choose to date as he does his black women. We will see a whole lot of negative changes in their attitudes too.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Rl lee ()
Date: February 14, 2013 09:53PM

Black women are the biggest of all human hypocrits.There have been tons more famous blk am married to white men!From Josephine Baker and Diana Ross to Alfa Woodard! Black women have always turned into aunt Jamima for white men! Yes they will gladly suck a white man and not one argument! To say oral is nasty , let me remind all black women ,that you want oral sex despite the facts that you have leakage ,spot bleed , yeast infections , genital warts, puss sores , and the worst rotten smelling discharges! What nerve saying something about sperm , with all the crap that comes out of you! Oh yeah a bloody period! None of these thing are a problem with white men are they? Stop making excuses to like white men when Whoopie Stacey Dash Janet and many many more black women have you the way!Stacey Dash has married 3 white men and none lasted more tha 2 years! Stop being Steve Harvey idiots, because he's been married 3 times!Ms Dash said she slept with all her 3 white husbands on the 1st date!oh how Aunt Jamimaish that is! Wake up black women , don't just be a wife according to the bible for white men be the same for black men too! 1hint for all young black women, a good black man is only interested in raising his own children not someone else's! Stop having these babies!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: main reason ()
Date: February 14, 2013 11:04PM

Because they look like lizzie.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Bessy ()
Date: February 14, 2013 11:32PM

7) The availability of cute Korean girls in Annandale?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Gregus ()
Date: February 15, 2013 01:31PM

The differences between the races is NEVER EVER, as great as the differences between Individuals between ALL the races.

Also each race of people has it's dirty laundry. So lets say we all get together as human beings, point fingers at one another over who does what in a worse way or whos better or worse due to a minutia of details anyone can focus on.

But at the end of THAT, what's next? Because if you're racist of any race that thinks itself Superior, then prove your superiority. Help the other less fortunate human beings. Help them, tech them invest in someone else emotionally.

Woman of all races are the same. They all have a wonderful ability to LOVE and channel love into your life. They require amazingly little to give you everything they have. All they want is for a man to give his genuine love to them.

Forget the negativity of evil stereotypes that predisposes you to be negative. Be positive. Ladies have always been very good to me. White, Arabic Black Asian. Show real love, show genuine emotion and show your weakness and they will see you as Strong and respect you.

Never lie to woman. Theyre borderline psychic anyway so what the point. They may not be able to prove it but theyll KNOW somethings up. And from there theyll resent you for being a coward and afraid of a woman.

Be an Alpha Male. Respect women, teach those less fortunate then you IF they show an interest in being taught. Don't look at women as collection of bodyparts for sexual pleasure. It's a human being with the same hopes dreams and aspirations like every other human being. Treat the Human with respect and show them love FIRST not like a coward waiting and waiting. If you feel it have the BALLS to be a real man and trust in your relationship with your partner.

I can't say enough as a white man (European) that ladies the world over are the same. There is really no racism between us as humans. Were more curious about one another then anything. Sometimes we label eachothers curiosity as a bad thing because someone didn't express their genuine childlike curiosity about someone different in a accepted politically correct way. And we Divide once again. Can't we just be more smart and enlightened?
Cant the average person cut eachother some slack? Is it wrong to feel people of color are very attractive Human Beings? Is it wrong for People of color to be attracted to White people? Ofcourse not. It's such a pointless energy drainer in our lives. Like someone feeding on this negativity as a delicious dish.

Im very open and honest and never pretended to not "notice" someones race. Screw that, i noticed and complimented. And it was and is always welcome because of a pure heart. Imagine me pleasure and HUMOR when an ethnic woman looks how pale i am and says " well you certainly are CRISP" and i say "oh really brown bear" and we both laugh for 10 min. Why can't we all be like THAT?

Tell me. Why not. I see us all as puppies and puppies will play together regardless of breed and not know any better. Its at a specific point in time that people and puppies learn the uglyness of the world and they start to act like a cog in a machine.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Gregus ()
Date: February 15, 2013 01:37PM

And to any Human being to which my post spoke, regardless obviously of race. Please help me spread the good will and genuine appreciation for eachother. We will get through it :) and reunite as a one peoples since the time of the tower of Baylon.

Take care and love yourselves and eachother.


Thank you.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: nigga jones ()
Date: February 15, 2013 07:58PM

Black women are just gross.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Ricardo ()
Date: February 25, 2013 08:30PM

There is no excuse for ignorance.black women need to educate themselves when it comd to race relations.is not abou you all the time.black men can date anybody.majority of black women are not good looking and they have bad attitudes,unless you halle barry.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Jeanette REese ()
Date: March 21, 2013 09:05PM

Black men are always complaining about black women being gold diggers and not looking twice at a blue collar man. White women will not look twice at you either if you don't have anything to offer them. The one's that might give you the time of day is some trailer park trash. If your ass don't have a job or at least show that you are trying to better yourself, they will even kick you to the curb. White women are raised with an attitude of entitlement. They think they are suppose to be taken care of. As women, we are suppose to be taken care of to a degree. Espescially if we have kids by a man. Yes, you black men complaing about black women. But you don't have a problem pulling your dick out and impregnating us. You do not like to take care of your responsibility. You black men are ignorant and too lazy to make a committment through marriage like the Bible says you are suppose to. Saying that black women have bad attitudes and we are gold diggers is an excuse and a cop out for you not taking responsibity as a man. Because trust me, white women are not going to put up with your shit either.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Jazzy J ()
Date: March 21, 2013 09:19PM

Why not blame the dead beat dads. Women do not get pregnant by themselves. If you are going to tell the ladies not to get pregnant, tell the men to keep their dick in their pants. Women always catch the blame for everything. This has been going on for centuries. It has always been a double standard for women and men. It's ok for a man to lay around and play around, but not a woman. If she does, then she's labled a whore. What about whoremongering? For those of you who do not know the definition of a whoremonger, according to the Bible and the Webster dictionary, it is a man who lays around and has sex with prostitues. A whoremonger can also be defined as a man who has sex with numerous women. This is how sexually transmitted diseases are spread.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Jazzy J ()
Date: March 21, 2013 09:42PM

Amen Sister! Black men are always compaining about racism, but they date and marry white women. Black men want all of the focus to be on them. They act like they are the only ones they suffer racism. Black women catch hell to. We catch it on the street and on the job. White men are always harrassing us on the street and in our places of employment. Do Black men defend us? NO. But soon as something happens to them whether, it is being falsey accused of a crime, or police brutality,
everybody is suppose to come to their resucue and feel sorry for them. They are all on the news speaking up against the injustice that was done to them. Then they turn around and date and marry a white women or some other woman of a different nationality. So why should we as black women feel sorry for black men and cater to them. Black men get just what their ignorant butts deserve.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Jazzy J ()
Date: March 21, 2013 09:44PM

Black men are ugly and gross. They stink and they don's take baths or showers or brush their teeth.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: WHITEHONKEYSHAVETHEWETDOGSMELL ()
Date: May 24, 2013 02:42AM

That's not what your mama said. Not only did she suck hard on black cock, your daddy guzzled the jizz!

That's how sick honkeys are...fuck kids, family members, barnyard animals, the family dog...the list is long.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: BEH ()
Date: May 24, 2013 07:34AM

The dog was a shameless tease, and axing for it.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Katie Cracker ()
Date: July 25, 2013 01:27PM

White or black, if you can't spell, who will listen to your opinion? Poor grammar and spelling screams ignorant. For example, using the word 'settle' vs. 'subtle' in one of the above posts.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Katie cracker ()
Date: July 25, 2013 01:39PM

Another idiot...using the word 'to' vs 'too'. Look it up.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Katie cracker ()
Date: July 25, 2013 01:44PM

Uh I think having babies that you can't take care of with a loser dad is a bit worse than whorish. It's called stupid, irresponsible, and perpetuating the cycle of millions of kids with no dad in his or her life. Try birth control for a change. Oh and how about getting an education and a decent JOB before you bring babies into the world.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Charlie Cracker ()
Date: July 25, 2013 03:07PM

Katie cracker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Uh I think having babies that you can't take care
> of with a loser dad is a bit worse than whorish.
> It's called stupid, irresponsible, and
> perpetuating the cycle of millions of kids with no
> dad in his or her life. Try birth control for a
> change. Oh and how about getting an education and
> a decent JOB before you bring babies into the
> world.

With the world population almost seven billion does it matter?

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: BLACKANDDISAPOINTED ()
Date: July 30, 2013 05:50PM

young black people learn from willie lynch PLEASE!!!
Greetings,
Gentlemen. I greet you here on the bank of the James River in the year of our Lord one thousand seven hundred and twelve. First, I shall thank you, the gentlemen of the Colony of Virginia, for bringing me here. I am here to help you solve some of your problems with slaves. Your invitation reached me on my modest plantation in the West Indies, where I have experimented with some of the newest, and still the oldest, methods for control of slaves. Ancient Rome would envy us if my program is implemented. As our boat sailed south on the James River, named for our illustrious King, whose version of the Bible we cherish, I saw enough to know that your problem is not unique. While Rome used cords of wood as crosses for standing human bodies along its highways in great numbers, you are here using the tree and the rope on occasions. I caught the whiff of a dead slave hanging from a tree, a couple miles back. You are not only losing valuable stock by hangings, you are having uprisings, slaves are running away, your crops are sometimes left in the fields too long for maximum profit, you suffer occasional fires, your animals are killed. Gentlemen, you know what your problems are; I do not need to elaborate. I am not here to enumerate your problems, I am here to introduce you to a method of solving them. In my bag here, I HAVE A FULL PROOF METHOD FOR CONTROLLING YOUR BLACK SLAVES. I guarantee every one of you that, if installed correctly, IT WILL CONTROL THE SLAVES FOR AT LEAST 300 HUNDREDS YEARS. My method is simple. Any member of your family or your overseer can use it. I HAVE OUTLINED A NUMBER OF DIFFERENCES AMONG THE SLAVES; AND I TAKE THESE DIFFERENCES AND MAKE THEM BIGGER. I USE FEAR, DISTRUST AND ENVY FOR CONTROL PURPOSES. These methods have worked on my modest plantation in the West Indies and it will work throughout the South. Take this simple little list of differences and think about them. On top of my list is “AGE,” but it’s there only because it starts with an “a.” The second is “COLOR” or shade. There is INTELLIGENCE, SIZE, SEX, SIZES OF PLANTATIONS, STATUS on plantations, ATTITUDEof owners, whether the slaves live in the valley, on a hill, East, West, North, South, have fine hair, course hair, or is tall or short. Now that you have a list of differences, I shall give you an outline of action, but before that, I shall assure you that DISTRUST IS STRONGER THAN TRUST AND ENVY STRONGER THAN ADULATION, RESPECT OR ADMIRATION. The Black slaves after receiving this indoctrination shall carry on and will become self-refueling and self-generating for HUNDREDS of years, maybe THOUSANDS. Don’t forget, you must pitch the OLD black male vs. the YOUNG black male, and the YOUNG black male against the OLD black male. You must use the DARK skin slaves vs. the LIGHT skin slaves, and the LIGHT skin slaves vs. the DARK skin slaves. You must use the FEMALE vs. the MALE, and the MALE vs. the FEMALE. You must also have white servants and overseers [who] distrust all Blacks. But it is NECESSARY THAT YOUR SLAVES TRUST AND DEPEND ON US. THEY MUST LOVE, RESPECT AND TRUST ONLY US. Gentlemen, these kits are your keys to control. Use them. Have your wives and children use them, never miss an opportunity.IF USED INTENSELY FOR ONE YEAR, THE SLAVES THEMSELVES WILL REMAIN PERPETUALLY DISTRUSTFUL. Thank you gentlemen.”
LET’S MAKE A SLAVE

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: black man, no thanks ()
Date: November 03, 2013 04:04AM

I am white and Mediterranean. I have a long time friend who happens to be black. We were coworkers. We live in different states now but are still friends. We correspond every few months or sometimes longer. I always respected him for being a really squared away person.

Tonight something happened that made me think it would be a very good idea to not date a black man ever. The subject of some white men dressing up in black face for a Halloween costume came up. I thought it was just distasteful but not something horrible. He said it was extremely offensive for a white person to dress in black face. I wasn't familiar with people dressing in black face as a thing and asked if it was some sort of common thing. He said it went back to the days of the Jim Crow laws. I said I didn't know about that. Of course, I had heard of the Jim Crow laws but didn't know anything about black face.

I felt like I sort of got a lecture at that point as though I should be responsible to know every little detail of black history in America. I was pretty irritated by that. Most Americans including black people do not know much of anything of the history of half of my ancestry. But I don't expect them to. I know it because it is part of my personal heritage so it is interesting to me. But it seems like every black person expects everybody else to be as obsessed with black history in America as blacks are themselves.

That is a really self indulgent attitude. I thought my friend was different than that. I always thought that he was not all about the whole blacks as victims self pity party that most blacks seem to have. I liked that about him because I thought that he was just a regular person who happened to be black. The fact that once you get down to it, even he expects everybody else to cater to his blackness has me feeling not just disappointed but offended.

Nobody caters to my particular ethnic concerns. I don't get some special protections under the law. People have a variety of ethnic slurs for my ethnic group. I don't get to go around whining about it and calling other people racists and asking for special quotas to force people to hire me or let me into schools and so on.

Nobody likes to be around somebody who constantly have a chip on their shoulder and think the whole world owes them. It is ok to be really interested in your own racial heritage. But expecting everybody else to be as well is just ridiculous.

The next time I hear a black person complaining that other races don't want to date them, I am going to just roll my eyes (figuratively). How many people want to date somebody who wants to play the perpetual victim in a relationship? How many people want to constantly cater to their partner's black victim agenda when their partner has no reciprocal interest in their ethnic experience? It is just ridiculously narcissistic. Who wants to date somebody who is always screaming ME ME ME ME like a damned two year old.

So sick of it. If black kids spent half the time working on fractions that they spend learning about black victimhood, maybe they wouldn't need all the affirmative action to get into college. I am really sick and tired of hearing the constant whining. And I am not the only one.

Marry a black man? I could see the never ending fights in the house when our child came home and wanted to whine about black victimhood. I'd be like, "Shut up and do your homework. Lots of people have it rough. I don't see you going hungry. You have it pretty good. You want to see what it is like to be deprived? We can send you to a third world country for the summer and you can see how you manage as a street orphan. How would that be?"

I just wouldn't tolerate that whiny, entitled garbage from my child. Most "white" people wouldn't. Which really explains a lot about a lot of things.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: ange ()
Date: December 31, 2013 06:02PM

Black women have chips on their shoulders apparently. I've asked many black males about this debate and they all say black women are less gracious, act like princesses and have bad argumentative attitudes. White woman tend to be more lady like and their inner beauty shines far more. I wouldn't know myself but this is from the horses mouths. I guess we live in a world where there are far more dominant white women in the public eye which puts them on a higher status, this disgruntles black women. I myself am chinese american but have a lot of black male friends who say all of the above.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: imbiker ()
Date: December 31, 2013 06:55PM

You decide!
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Big-fat-ass-Michelle-Obama-38488065044.jpeg

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: Logic ()
Date: January 01, 2014 03:23PM

I love black women they are beautiful in everyway!!!! Nothing compare and I have been with beautiful women of all races, ethnicities, color, etc but nothing beats an American black woman...WOOO WEEE! P*ssy like GOLD!

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: dee ()
Date: April 07, 2014 02:34AM

I just happened to stumble of this post I am in Fairfax and I'm a black women successful beautiful and married to a black man. First of I have worked withe white women in the area the go out to bars throw there self on black me hook up with them the same night swallow their semen without the black man taking a shower then come to work the next day smelling like sex and alcohol. White women answer me this question why are when your with a black man and you see a attractive black women like myself pass by why do you guard the black man from staring at me?
White men why are you always trying to strike up a conversation with me smiling as if you won the lottery but always I don't give you any attention.
The black men that I know that date with women on use them drive their car ruin their credit move into their homes and have white women pay for everything. But all black men are still attractive to black women. The full lips the big boots and the soft sun kissed skin. I as a black women have naturally what white women pay for.

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Re: Ten Reasons Why Black Men Won't Date/Marry Black Women
Posted by: This whole thread ........ ()
Date: April 10, 2014 02:51PM

Is a load of horseshit. First of all, when you speak in generalities (all black men do......., all white people do......) you sound like a fool, there are good and bad people in every race. There are plenty of happily married black on black couples (Gasp,that can't be true), it's just that it's not any fun to acknowledge that people are people and that there are no superior races because we were ALL created in the image of our maker. If you don't beleive that then you must not be a believer in a higher power (which is fine too).There are idiotic stereotypes of women (and men) of all races but stereotypes are just that ....idiotic. If you were to beleive them all you would choose not to date/marry any one at all (except asian women... that whole submissive to their man sterotype sounds good to me. If only it were true). The world needs to stop with these petty divisions amongst us (especially the different races) and just try to coexist as best we can.

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