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Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: February 24, 2021 07:23PM

Hope he enjoys his new hobby

cannot stand the “did you evacuate your bowels?” Or “how often do you evacuate your bowels?”

These medical people think they’re the shit, and use such terminology to reinforce their superiority over those of us with bowel problems.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Brown Onion talks about poo ()
Date: February 24, 2021 08:41PM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hope he enjoys his new hobby
>
> cannot stand the “did you evacuate your
> bowels?” Or “how often do you evacuate your
> bowels?”
>
> These medical people think they’re the shit, and
> use such terminology to reinforce their
> superiority over those of us with bowel problems.

You're the one who insists on using the word 'bowels'.

How the fuck do you want your doctor to ask you if you took a dump?


"Did you make Brown Bears when sitting on the groan throne?"
Attachments:
output_uCd2kZ.gif

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Date: February 24, 2021 09:22PM

Why would a doctor even ask? It's so much more enjoyable and often exciting to just peer up there and have a look. When I find a doctor who gets on his knees, sticks his head between my cheeks and gazes deeply into my bowels I like to reward him with a nice torrent of pressurized chocolate soft serv. Such lucky docs will gobble it up without missing a drop.

Brown Onion and I generally accompany each other to our doctor visits, and we go to the same doctors.

Any trip to the doctor should involve a thorough rectal exam. Some doctors will attempt to perform this procedure using only their finger. So if you bend over for a rectal exam and have to ask "is it in yet", run, do not walk, to the next doctor. A good doctor will perform rectal exams with his large, firm, ungloved penis. The penis is much longer and thicker than a finger and it is much more sensitive so it can detect abnormalities much better. Any doctor who uses his finger is a quack -- or he has a very small dick.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 06:37AM

So nice people waste time here with false stories. Thank you for acknowledging your fondness for my discussions on IBS, and supporting those with this condition. You also prove my hypothesis. People with superior bowels are smug lying assholes who treat us as lepers.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Real Fatso Freddie ()
Date: February 25, 2021 06:41AM

Healthy breakfast today. Fruit bowl, English muffin and tomato juice.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Boiled Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 07:23AM

Pancakes, eggs, coffee. Take that bowels.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Rusty 1965 ()
Date: February 25, 2021 10:09AM

Glad Brown made a return. A lot of anger by this person he calls the blocker. I’m proud of Brown for returning, and his grandchildren have taught him a few new computer tricks, to stop the nonsense thrown his way.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Brown Onion talks about poo ()
Date: February 25, 2021 10:25AM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So nice people waste time here with false stories.
> Thank you for acknowledging your fondness for my
> discussions on IBS, and supporting those with this
> condition. You also prove my hypothesis. People
> with superior bowels are smug lying assholes who
> treat us as lepers.


How do your stories about poo help IBS sufferers?
Attachments:
OMG-I-SHIT-Myself-Pantyhose-EXPLOSION-Turds-Diarrhea.gif

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Date: February 25, 2021 10:51AM

Rusty 1965 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Glad Brown made a return. A lot of anger by this
> person he calls the blocker. I’m proud of Brown
> for returning

Of course Brown made a return. When he dies he always announces it via one of his sock puppets. I'm glad our lord and savior has taught him a few tricks about resurrection from the dead. In any event he wasn't dead this time but there was a small fire.

A couple days ago Brown Onion and I had been having another roughage-fueled all-night anal sex session with our buddy Mitch, which left quite an impressive mound of excrement in the bed. There was a puddle of urine in the middle of the shit. Brown was browsing some scat porn and absent-mindedly plopped his laptop down into the liquid while still powered on. There was a flurry of sparks and the smell of burning urine and feces filled the air as flames shot up.

Luckily a member of Mitch McConnell's security detail noticed the smell and flames and pulled the smoldering laptop from the steaming pile of shit. It was sent off to Mr. Mac Isaac's repair shop in Delaware and Brown just got it back yesterday afternoon.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Pillar of the community Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 11:15AM

Gay lover of Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Rusty 1965 Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Glad Brown made a return. A lot of anger by
> this
> > person he calls the blocker. I’m proud of
> Brown
> > for returning
>
> Of course Brown made a return. When he dies he
> always announces it via one of his sock puppets.
> I'm glad our lord and savior has taught him a few
> tricks about resurrection from the dead. In any
> event he wasn't dead this time but there was a
> small fire.
>
> A couple days ago Brown Onion and I had been
> having another roughage-fueled all-night anal sex
> session with our buddy Mitch, which left quite an
> impressive mound of excrement in the bed. There
> was a puddle of urine in the middle of the shit.
> Brown was browsing some scat porn and
> absent-mindedly plopped his laptop down into the
> liquid while still powered on. There was a flurry
> of sparks and the smell of burning urine and feces
> filled the air as flames shot up.
>
> Luckily a member of Mitch McConnell's security
> detail noticed the smell and flames and pulled the
> smoldering laptop from the steaming pile of shit.
> It was sent off to Mr. Mac Isaac's repair shop in
> Delaware and Brown just got it back yesterday
> afternoon.

It is so nice that you are helping an elderly gentleman transition to death. Is he still clueless that his prestigious guests are nothing more than members of McLean's gay community playing dress up?

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Boiled Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 11:55AM

Bacon cheeseburger, fries, soda. Take that bowels.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Fatso Freddie ()
Date: February 25, 2021 12:16PM

Nachos and cheese, pretzels. Chili dogs. Going to show them bowels who the boss is.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Date: February 25, 2021 12:20PM

Pillar of the community Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It is so nice that you are helping an elderly
> gentleman transition to death. Is he still
> clueless that his prestigious guests are nothing
> more than members of McLean's gay community
> playing dress up?

Yes Brown Onion does get confused quite often. I used to take him to dog parks and he quite enjoyed being outdoors. He would get down on hands and knees to sniff the asses of other dogs, then wolf down the tasty piles of dogshit he found.

Sadly we have had to stop going to dog parks. Last time we were there, a typical horny hound dog tried to mount him from behind. For reasons unknown, Brown thought the dog was Elvis Presley and actually removed his pants to give the dog access to his starfish. He launched in to singing "You ain't nothin' but a hound dog..." while pushing his hips back into the happy hound who was humping away to the shock and horror of other visitors to the dog park. After the dog climaxed, we were asked to leave.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Meat Sandwich ()
Date: February 25, 2021 12:29PM

Gay lover of Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Pillar of the community Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > It is so nice that you are helping an elderly
> > gentleman transition to death. Is he still
> > clueless that his prestigious guests are
> nothing
> > more than members of McLean's gay community
> > playing dress up?
>
> Yes Brown Onion does get confused quite often. I
> used to take him to dog parks and he quite enjoyed
> being outdoors. He would get down on hands and
> knees to sniff the asses of other dogs, then wolf
> down the tasty piles of dogshit he found.
>
> Sadly we have had to stop going to dog parks.
> Last time we were there, a typical horny hound dog
> tried to mount him from behind. For reasons
> unknown, Brown thought the dog was Elvis Presley
> and actually removed his pants to give the dog
> access to his starfish. He launched in to singing
> "You ain't nothin' but a hound dog..." while
> pushing his hips back into the happy hound who was
> humping away to the shock and horror of other
> visitors to the dog park. After the dog climaxed,
> we were asked to leave.


Funny as fuck! This thread is always hilarious!

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Freak Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 12:36PM

Creamed onions , ketchup, Pizza rolls, Mountain Dee

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Is it in yet? ()
Date: February 25, 2021 12:57PM

Gay lover of Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Why would a doctor even ask? It's so much more
> enjoyable and often exciting to just peer up there
> and have a look. When I find a doctor who gets on
> his knees, sticks his head between my cheeks and
> gazes deeply into my bowels I like to reward him
> with a nice torrent of pressurized chocolate soft
> serv. Such lucky docs will gobble it up without
> missing a drop.
>
> Brown Onion and I generally accompany each other
> to our doctor visits, and we go to the same
> doctors.
>
> Any trip to the doctor should involve a thorough
> rectal exam. Some doctors will attempt to perform
> this procedure using only their finger. So if you
> bend over for a rectal exam and have to ask "is it
> in yet"
, run, do not walk, to the next doctor. A
> good doctor will perform rectal exams with his
> large, firm, ungloved penis. The penis is much
> longer and thicker than a finger and it is much
> more sensitive so it can detect abnormalities much
> better. Any doctor who uses his finger is a quack
> -- or he has a very small dick.

I don't have any bowel problems but a rectal exam is part of my regular doctor visits. Typically I start singing "Moon River". But "Is it in yet?" sounds much better. Thanks for the idea.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Rusty 1965 ()
Date: February 25, 2021 01:17PM

I have one 'life hack' that works wonders for those rectal exams. I purposely do not evacuate my bowels before going. If I'm lucky, I might even have a 'turtle' coming out when I drop trou'. Most doctors act like they don't care. Some send my off to the restroom to clear the path. Then there are the members of the 'bowels brigade'. The type who went to med school since they love poking at poop while it is fresh in the body.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: This. ()
Date: February 25, 2021 01:46PM

Gay lover of Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> A
> good doctor will perform rectal exams with his
> large, firm, ungloved penis. The penis is much
> longer and thicker than a finger and it is much
> more sensitive so it can detect abnormalities much
> better. Any doctor who uses his finger is a quack
> -- or he has a very small dick.

A doctor has more nerves and sensitivity in his penis than he does in his finger. So if your doctor starts putting on gloves, you should demand he use his penis and give you a proper exam. Mine uses a thin condom just to keep his semen from shooting up my ass and then leaking out to cause an embarrassing stain as I leave the office.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Retired GI ()
Date: February 25, 2021 02:45PM

These write ups continue to deteriorate. No one in my profession does this kind of untoward act. User name Brown Onion and you other degenerates need to grow up.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Rusty 1965 ()
Date: February 25, 2021 02:59PM

Retired GI Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> These write ups continue to deteriorate. No one in
> my profession does this kind of untoward act. User
> name Brown Onion and you other degenerates need to
> grow up.

My neighbor, Brown Onion, is correct. There is so much intolerance and ignorance to our adult lifestyle. I get a fasting blood draw as part of my checkups. I get my pooper poke after my blood is taken. My Doctor doesn't use a condom. As the examination is reaching its climax, he just turns me over and I get a quick protein blast to break my fast.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Spring Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 03:11PM

Dad and the obese neighbor are selling jenkum from grandmas station wagon. Apparently they have a two for one deal. I took business classes at college, and they don’t believe that, them wearing little bikinis will not help them financially. Dad is so rude towards my knowledge, and even the obese neighbor doesn’t seem to care either about their marketing efforts. I predict they’ll be arrested for selling jenkum, but grandma will make me a good sandwich with vegetables.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Trampoline Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 03:12PM

Pinto beans, kidney beans, baked beans. My bowels will be jumpin

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Aromatic Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 05:01PM

Trampoline Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Pinto beans, kidney beans, baked beans. My bowels
> will be jumpin

I'm hoping you don't sleep alone.

It would be a shame to waste tonight's Dutch oven.

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Meat Sandwich ()
Date: February 25, 2021 07:48PM

Best thread on the underground!

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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: Boiled Onion ()
Date: February 25, 2021 08:46PM





































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Re: Due to bowel blocker, part 2
Posted by: BO likes this content ()
Date: March 28, 2021 11:33PM




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