HomeFairfax General ForumArrest/Ticket SearchWiki newPictures/VideosChatArticlesLinksAbout
Off-Topic :  Fairfax Underground fairfax underground logo
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: July 27, 2020 10:09PM

45PM

My butt is going to explode tonight. Its only a matter of when, and I'm wondering if it'll be two or four Pirelli tires. Maybe even with the alloy wheels. I made the mistake of eating lasagna, and while it was delicious, the bowels are paying for it. No doubt the piping is going to scream, along with the poor starfish that is battered each and every time. My best guess is Fred Smoot from the Redskins will be joining me tonight, along with the midwives. Its going to be a shitstorm.

Update, more midwives enroute. The amount of tile scraping is a record.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Rusty Craplace . ()
Date: July 27, 2020 10:22PM

..
Attachments:
rusty and ffff.gif

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Fare Fax ()
Date: July 27, 2020 11:14PM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> 45PM
>
> My butt is going to explode tonight. Its only a
> matter of when, and I'm wondering if it'll be two
> or four Pirelli tires. Maybe even with the alloy
> wheels. I made the mistake of eating lasagna, and
> while it was delicious, the bowels are paying for
> it. No doubt the piping is going to scream, along
> with the poor starfish that is battered each and
> every time. My best guess is Fred Smoot from the
> Redskins will be joining me tonight, along with
> the midwives. Its going to be a shitstorm.
>
> Update, more midwives enroute. The amount of tile
> scraping is a record.


Wow good luck!!!!!!!!!!

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: boiled onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 06:25AM

Working from home again today and I am making breakfast burritos stuffed with eggs cheese sausage and home fries. my bowels can handle it.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: toasted onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 07:54AM

boiled onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Working from home again today and I am making
> breakfast burritos stuffed with eggs cheese
> sausage and home fries. my bowels can handle it.

Do you like oatmeal? I love a bowl of oatmeal with some fresh fruit for breakfast. Eating healthy can make you feel really good!

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: WTF????????????????????? ()
Date: July 28, 2020 10:48AM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> 45PM
>
> My butt is going to explode tonight. Its only a
> matter of when, and I'm wondering if it'll be two
> or four Pirelli tires. Maybe even with the alloy
> wheels. I made the mistake of eating lasagna, and
> while it was delicious, the bowels are paying for
> it. No doubt the piping is going to scream, along
> with the poor starfish that is battered each and
> every time. My best guess is Fred Smoot from the
> Redskins will be joining me tonight, along with
> the midwives. Its going to be a shitstorm.
>
> Update, more midwives enroute. The amount of tile
> scraping is a record.

Are you for real? Thinking about shit like this is seriously fucked up.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: back injury onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 12:57PM

I hurt my back and the doctor gave me pain pills that made my back feel better and my bowels feel worse. I got so backed up that I had to go to the ER. They gave me the stuff you have to drink before a colonoscopy, told me to go home and drink the stuff. It worked and when I sat on the toilet it sounded like someone was dumping a 5 gallon bucket into the toilet. I started flushing right away but the toilet still clogged. I think I would rather live with back pain instead of butt pain.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Rusty Craplace. ()
Date: July 28, 2020 01:18PM

back injury onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I hurt my back and the doctor gave me pain pills
> that made my back feel better and my bowels feel
> worse. I got so backed up that I had to go to the
> ER. They gave me the stuff you have to drink
> before a colonoscopy, told me to go home and drink
> the stuff. It worked and when I sat on the toilet
> it sounded like someone was dumping a 5 gallon
> bucket into the toilet. I started flushing right
> away but the toilet still clogged. I think I would
> rather live with back pain instead of butt pain.


Pictures or it didn't happen.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: boiled onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 05:09PM

Just got back from Royal Farms. Got me two chicken salad and bacon subs with cheese and a bag of cheetos. Going to wash all that down with a 6 pack of ice cold Budweiser in 16oz cans. My bowels are ready.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: John J Crapper ()
Date: July 28, 2020 05:34PM

I left a horse sized crap in the dicks at Fairfax today. To hell with them.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion likes this content ()
Date: July 28, 2020 06:37PM

fiber is important
Attachments:
mostrrrrr.gif

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion loves this content ()
Date: July 28, 2020 07:36PM

Brown Onion likes this content Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> fiber is important


Brown Onion does believe that poop isn't just for flushing.


However, he prefers 'alternative' images...mano on mano..
Attachments:
birthingblacks.gif

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: image blocking onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 08:28PM

Just a reminder to everyone to block the images from this forum. Just check your browser settings , it is easy to block!

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Nasty man says what.. ()
Date: July 28, 2020 09:27PM

image blocking onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Just a reminder to everyone to block the images
> from this forum. Just check your browser settings
> , it is easy to block!

Of course, the imagery in the following write-up is completely acceptable.


"My butt is going to explode tonight. Its only a matter of when, and I'm wondering if it'll be two or four Pirelli tires. Maybe even with the alloy wheels. I made the mistake of eating lasagna, and while it was delicious, the bowels are paying for it. No doubt the piping is going to scream, along with the poor starfish that is battered each and every time. My best guess is Fred Smoot from the Redskins will be joining me tonight, along with the midwives. Its going to be a shitstorm."

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider ()
Date: July 28, 2020 09:30PM

Why block images? They are a perfect accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum Pillow Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Lipstick on a shitpig ()
Date: July 28, 2020 09:34PM

Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Why block images? They are a perfect
> accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum Pillow
> Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...


They seem to think Brown Onion is on a different level than the images...

Nope... They must be shown that he is not.

Brown Onion starts threads about poop, he gets poop.
Attachments:
pppppppppp.gif

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Calling it Onion ()
Date: July 28, 2020 09:50PM

Lipstick on a shitpig Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Why block images? They are a perfect
> > accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum Pillow
> > Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...
>
>
> They seem to think Brown Onion is on a different
> level than the images...
>
> Nope... They must be shown that he is not.
>
> Brown Onion starts threads about poop, he gets
> poop.

You keep images like this on your computer?

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Filthy minded man ()
Date: July 28, 2020 10:03PM

Calling it Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Lipstick on a shitpig Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Why block images? They are a perfect
> > > accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum
> Pillow
> > > Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...
> >
> >
> > They seem to think Brown Onion is on a
> different
> > level than the images...
> >
> > Nope... They must be shown that he is not.
> >
> > Brown Onion starts threads about poop, he gets
> > poop.
>
> You keep images like this on your computer?


Better there than conjuring up this kind of filth out of my mind!


"My butt is going to explode tonight. Its only a matter of when, and I'm wondering if it'll be two or four Pirelli tires. Maybe even with the alloy wheels. I made the mistake of eating lasagna, and while it was delicious, the bowels are paying for it. No doubt the piping is going to scream, along with the poor starfish that is battered each and every time. My best guess is Fred Smoot from the Redskins will be joining me tonight, along with the midwives. Its going to be a shitstorm."

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: 5am guy ()
Date: July 29, 2020 04:35AM

Hi all! 5am guy checking in here. 5am guy has been working the graveyard shift since 2011 now and it is starting to affect 5am guys mental health. 5am guy lives in a little 3rd floor condo and 5am guy sleeps all day while the rest of the world is doing stuff. 5am guy has been keeping these hours even on his days off. All this is causing bowel trouble for 5am guy. 5am guy sends best wishes to the BiB's!

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: That sucks 5 ()
Date: July 29, 2020 04:39AM

I'm sorry to hear that 5.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Poopy Fartz ()
Date: July 29, 2020 11:54AM

Hi 5am! Poopy Fartz works rotating shifts and suffers from sporadic bowel issues. Maintain your sleep schedule and increase healthy food consumption to promote regular movements. Poopy Fartz knows nothing about mental health and encourages 5am to seek assistance from other helpful user groups for the issue that are widely available 24/7.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Nietzsche Onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 12:39PM

5am guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi all! 5am guy checking in here. 5am guy has been
> working the graveyard shift since 2011 now and it
> is starting to affect 5am guys mental health. 5am
> guy lives in a little 3rd floor condo and 5am guy
> sleeps all day while the rest of the world is
> doing stuff. 5am guy has been keeping these hours
> even on his days off. All this is causing bowel
> trouble for 5am guy. 5am guy sends best wishes to
> the BiB's!

Maybe if you didn't obsess about poop so much the world wouldn't look so shitty.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: You will snuff it soon Onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 12:46PM

5am guy Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi all! 5am guy checking in here. 5am guy has been
> working the graveyard shift since 2011 now and it
> is starting to affect 5am guys mental health. 5am
> guy lives in a little 3rd floor condo and 5am guy
> sleeps all day while the rest of the world is
> doing stuff. 5am guy has been keeping these hours
> even on his days off. All this is causing bowel
> trouble for 5am guy. 5am guy sends best wishes to
> the BiB's!

If its any consolation, your ongoing mental illness is now much more common as people's schedules have been disrupted by Covid. I routinely stay up till 230 am and sleep till 1030 am. No big deal. Not sure how old you are but retraining in a field that would pay more and provide better hours would be a good idea. the fact you are here posting about your bathroom issues points toward the endemic failure of you life overall. Improve yourself if possible.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: The Tooth Onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 12:49PM

Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Why block images? They are a perfect
> accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum Pillow
> Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...

agreed, same poster. BO posts the scat prose erotica completed by sockpuppet posting of naughty/delicious gifs. Unusual and thankfully rare form of sexual gratification.

Img busting poster you know what to do...

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: t3ucj ()
Date: July 29, 2020 12:57PM

Poopy Fartz Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hi 5am! Poopy Fartz works rotating shifts and
> suffers from sporadic bowel issues. Maintain your
> sleep schedule and increase healthy food
> consumption to promote regular movements. Poopy
> Fartz knows nothing about mental health and
> encourages 5am to seek assistance from other
> helpful user groups for the issue that are widely
> available 24/7.

Make a habit of adding raw or slightly cooked carrots and celery to meals. It really helps with evac issues.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Army Rat ()
Date: July 29, 2020 01:18PM

t3ucj Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Poopy Fartz Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hi 5am! Poopy Fartz works rotating shifts and
> > suffers from sporadic bowel issues. Maintain
> your
> > sleep schedule and increase healthy food
> > consumption to promote regular movements.
> Poopy
> > Fartz knows nothing about mental health and
> > encourages 5am to seek assistance from other
> > helpful user groups for the issue that are
> widely
> > available 24/7.
>
> Make a habit of adding raw or slightly cooked
> carrots and celery to meals. It really helps with
> evac issues.

It's an old military fix that works. When possible, adding carrots/celery/ any raw veggies to diet in theatre kept awful combat field MRE offerings moving out of the exhaust pipe during Gulf War 1990.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Thank God for Brown Onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 05:39PM

The Tooth Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sportcraft 15’ Bowrider Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Why block images? They are a perfect
> > accompaniment to Brown Onions Scat Forum Pillow
> > Talk Romance Stories. Naughty/delicious...
>
> agreed, same poster. BO posts the scat prose
> erotica completed by sockpuppet posting of
> naughty/delicious gifs. Unusual and thankfully
> rare form of sexual gratification.
>
> Img busting poster you know what to do...

Without Brown Onion leading the way, all those who find his prose erotica exciting would have nowhere to turn.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 05:55PM

Witch hazel and other products are becoming more expensive. I'm not thrilled about this, as the terrible inflation is making what pains me, far far worse. I hope that President Trump, along with both senators in Virginia will look into this. I've written letters to all of them, to let them know of my bowel woes and how this price affects all of us with IBS.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: What are you talking about? ()
Date: July 29, 2020 06:08PM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Witch hazel and other products are becoming more
> expensive. I'm not thrilled about this, as the
> terrible inflation is making what pains me, far
> far worse. I hope that President Trump, along with
> both senators in Virginia will look into this.
> I've written letters to all of them, to let them
> know of my bowel woes and how this price affects
> all of us with IBS.


A pint of witch hazel is less than 4 bucks at Walmart.

We are in a fucking pandemic, we have bigger health issues than your ass.

https://www.walmart.com/ip/Dickinson-s-Witch-Hazel-Cleansing-Astringent-16-Fl-Oz/10321470

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion likes this content ()
Date: July 29, 2020 06:18PM

What are you talking about? Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Witch hazel and other products are becoming
> more
> > expensive. I'm not thrilled about this, as the
> > terrible inflation is making what pains me, far
> > far worse. I hope that President Trump, along
> with
> > both senators in Virginia will look into this.
> > I've written letters to all of them, to let
> them
> > know of my bowel woes and how this price
> affects
> > all of us with IBS.
>
>
> A pint of witch hazel is less than 4 bucks at
> Walmart.
>
> We are in a fucking pandemic, we have bigger
> health issues than your ass.
>
> https://www.walmart.com/ip/Dickinson-s-Witch-Hazel
> -Cleansing-Astringent-16-Fl-Oz/10321470


I don't think you realize how much witch hazel Brown Onion and Rusty go through.
Attachments:
brownnnnnnnnnnfff.gif

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: spring onion ()
Date: July 29, 2020 06:26PM





































.






















































Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: boiled onion ()
Date: July 30, 2020 07:31AM

I called in sick today. Thinking about making a big pot of chili and letting it simmer in the crock pot all day. Before I head to the store to get chili makings I am having 6 fried eggs with a can of Spam sliced and fried up crispy with two English muffins.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: BEH ()
Date: July 30, 2020 12:46PM

When it comes to your bowels, you get what you put it into it.

If it's not a good amount of water and fiber a day, you shouldn't be astonished when you shit a brick, or squirt a river.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: blow it out yer ass onion. ()
Date: July 30, 2020 07:59PM

blow it out yer ass.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: Pirelli Bowels
Posted by: Brown Onion likes this content ()
Date: July 30, 2020 08:41PM

blow it out yer ass onion. Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> blow it out yer ass.


That just happens to be Brown Onion's favorite activity!
Attachments:
bgggg.gif

Options: ReplyQuote


Your Name: 
Your Email (Optional): 
Subject: 
Attach a file
  • No file can be larger than 75 MB
  • All files together cannot be larger than 300 MB
  • 30 more file(s) can be attached to this message
Spam prevention:
Please, enter the code that you see below in the input field. This is for blocking bots that try to post this form automatically.
 ********   **      **  **    **        **  ********  
 **     **  **  **  **  ***   **        **  **     ** 
 **     **  **  **  **  ****  **        **  **     ** 
 ********   **  **  **  ** ** **        **  **     ** 
 **         **  **  **  **  ****  **    **  **     ** 
 **         **  **  **  **   ***  **    **  **     ** 
 **          ***  ***   **    **   ******   ********  
This forum powered by Phorum.