Ok spill 'em guys. Let's here your ugly bagger stories.

How big was she?
Where'd you guys meet?
How drunk were you?

Girls can play too :-)

a fellow told me he had a sister who looked just fine. But, instead of being my deliverance, she had a strange resemblance to this cat named Frankenstein.




bitch was ugly, is what I'm sayin.

when I was just starting college I saw a friends sister's picture on facebook. she was really cute, looked like Tina Fey. She was all hot and thin. im like WOW. but then i met her in person when I went to his house for a 4th july party she was all 300 lbs and 7ft tall. Her face was all messed up with Acne. turns out she was this dudes half sister from another mother. Yikes.

ferfux Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> when I was just starting college I saw a friends
> sister's picture on facebook. she was really
> cute, looked like Tina Fey. She was all hot and
> thin. im like WOW. but then i met her in person
> when I went to his house for a 4th july party she
> was all 300 lbs and 7ft tall. Her face was all
> messed up with Acne. turns out she was this dudes
> half sister from another mother. Yikes.


So how many beers before she looked like her facebook picture and how many wash, rinse, repeat cycles did you perform on your dick after you nailed her?

Gonads & Strife Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ferfux Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > when I was just starting college I saw a
> friends
> > sister's picture on facebook. she was really
> > cute, looked like Tina Fey. She was all hot and
> > thin. im like WOW. but then i met her in
> person
> > when I went to his house for a 4th july party
> she
> > was all 300 lbs and 7ft tall. Her face was all
> > messed up with Acne. turns out she was this
> dudes
> > half sister from another mother. Yikes.
>
>
> So how many beers before she looked like her
> facebook picture and how many wash, rinse, repeat
> cycles did you perform on your dick after you
> nailed her?


bwahahahahahahaha!!!!

My roommate had this girlfriend and I was trying to do a trifecta and nail all three of her best friends. The first one was pretty good looking except she had a bit of a snaggletooth. I bagged her twice. Great body and a good lay. The second one was pretty ugly but I was so drunk I couldn't pick her out of a lineup. My roommate told me later that he once pointed her out to sombody and told them I nailed her and they asked if she was a dude or a chick. I was having a hard time getting it up and I remember her blowing me and begging to get some wood so I could fuck her. I never closed the deal on the third one.

u banged the trifecta of fugly, congrats!

No, I didn't manage to nail all three. Naturally, the third one was the one I wanted to do the most.

wow Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> u banged the trifecta of fugly, congrats!

Haha that shit is the worst!




fuglyfucker Wrote:
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> I was having a hard time getting
> it up and I remember her blowing me and begging to
> get some wood so I could fuck her.

Back in college there was a friend of my buddy's girlfriend that was really into me. She had an alright face, but she was pushing 160 easily, so I normally just blew her off. One night, after drinking grain/grape Kool-Aid, I was so hammered that I just didn't care. I knew I'd catch shit the next day, but to hell with it. So we start hooking up and after what felt like hours I go for my wallet. She then says "I want this to mean something", to which I replied "I don't know about that, but what I do know is that I won't be this drunk forever, so you might want to take that into consideration." Then she screamed that I was an asshole, hit me in the face with my hiking boot, and stormed out. My buddy and his girlfriend came in asking what was going on and I told them. He died laughing, his girlfriend thought I was an asshole, got pissed at my buddy for laughing, and somewhere there is a photo of me with a red imprint of boot tread on my face.

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

The problem with getting with ugly chicks when you are drunk is the next day they think you are going to get married and spend the rest of your lives together. Then it's all fucking awkward until you can figure out a way to avoid her or break it off without seeming like a massive prick.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The problem with getting with ugly chicks when you
> are drunk is the next day they think you are going
> to get married and spend the rest of your lives
> together. Then it's all fucking awkward until you
> can figure out a way to avoid her or break it off
> without seeming like a massive prick.


That's why you leave before they wake up!

Another time I was out drinking with a different buddy. The bartender comes over and tells us two girls wanted to buy us a drink but wouldn't tell us which ones. Finally we got it out of her, and sure enough they were pigs. We took them home anyway, got naked in the hot tub and ended up banging them both. A couple of days later we went out drinking again and when we got home we found a six pack of beer at the door and a note saying we should call them. We went ahead and doubled down. My friend's chick was a little psycho, she wrote him a bunch of letters and shit for a few weeks, but mine was just a lot of fun. We ran into them at a bar another night and got a bunch of shit from our friends, but I have no regrets. It's true what they say, the ugly ones try a lot harder.

fuglyfucker Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
It's
> true what they say, the ugly ones try a lot
> harder.


You know what they say about fat girls and mopeds.



---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> fuglyfucker Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> It's
> > true what they say, the ugly ones try a lot
> > harder.
>
>
> You know what they say about fat girls and mopeds.
>
>
>

That's no fat chick. That's a monkey trying to fuck a football.

Poor moped...he needed something more along these lines.

That one looks like my ex's wife.

*giggle*

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> fuglyfucker Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> It's
> > true what they say, the ugly ones try a lot
> > harder.
>
>
> You know what they say about fat girls and mopeds.
>
>
>


That moped went from about 100mpg to about 10mpg.

---------------------------------------------------
W.W.S.D. what would Scooby Doo

Gonads & Strife Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> ferfux Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > when I was just starting college I saw a
> friends
> > sister's picture on facebook. she was really
> > cute, looked like Tina Fey. She was all hot and
> > thin. im like WOW. but then i met her in
> person
> > when I went to his house for a 4th july party
> she
> > was all 300 lbs and 7ft tall. Her face was all
> > messed up with Acne. turns out she was this
> dudes
> > half sister from another mother. Yikes.
>
>
> So how many beers before she looked like her
> facebook picture and how many wash, rinse, repeat
> cycles did you perform on your dick after you
> nailed her?


no but she tried to go down on me later when we made a run for more ice. Shivers.

This isn't so much a story about an ugly chick, but here goes anyway. Back in the early 80's a friend of mine went out one night trying to get laid. We were just high school kids then. We were cruising a part of town that was known for cruising. There would be stop and go traffic at midnight just from cars cruising. It was also an area known for prostitutes.

Anyway, so we found this hooker that we were talking to and she was fine. We knew she was a hooker but we were flirting with her and talking shit and we thought we were going to get a freebie. What can I say, we were teenagers so any piece of ass sounded good. We went back to the room she was using and the deal was my friend was going to go first. I wasn't thrilled about that, but again I was like 16 so anything was better than nothing. They went into the other room and about 5 minutes later he came out and his face was white.

He told me we had to get out of there and was getting dressed. We left, and I can still remember his face as he described what had happened and why we had to leave. He told me that as he was getting ready to put it in, she told him he would need to wet it. All of a sudden he realized that the hooker wasn't a woman and that he was about to ass-fuck a transvestite.

As I said, this was the early 80's and we had only just started hearing about AIDS. We wondered if that was something we might need to worry about. We resolved to never talk about it again. And I never have.

holy fuck... that last one
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