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Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:29AM

Good morning brothers in bowel. I want to share a dream I had with you. Last night I enjoyed “The Price is Right” bowels edition. The music started, Bob Barker and his lovely vixens were on, and all of the products to guess the prices on were castor oil, witch hazel, wet towelettes, Preparation H. Even the models were bloated and doubled over, and Bob admitted to during taping, dropping a fifty pound bag of cement on his California groan throne. He also said to spay or neuter your pets, so future ones may not have IBS. All of the contestants bid on groan thrones, the cost of rude doctor visits, or blenders that mixed all kinds of foods to show what ones bowels has to contend with. It was a really good dream, and I hope that the nice lady won her bid on tbd bottle of Metamucil.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Rusty Craplace ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:44AM

Good job Brown Onion. Way to respond.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: what the fuck is wrong with you? ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:46AM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Good morning brothers in bowel. I want to share a
> dream I had with you. Last night I enjoyed “The
> Price is Right” bowels edition. The music
> started, Bob Barker and his lovely vixens were on,
> and all of the products to guess the prices on
> were castor oil, witch hazel, wet towelettes,
> Preparation H. Even the models were bloated and
> doubled over, and Bob admitted to during taping,
> dropping a fifty pound bag of cement on his
> California groan throne. He also said to spay or
> neuter your pets, so future ones may not have IBS.
> All of the contestants bid on groan thrones, the
> cost of rude doctor visits, or blenders that mixed
> all kinds of foods to show what ones bowels has to
> contend with. It was a really good dream, and I
> hope that the nice lady won her bid on tbd bottle
> of Metamucil.


Get Help

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: what the fuck is wrong with you? ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:46AM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Good morning brothers in bowel. I want to share a
> dream I had with you. Last night I enjoyed “The
> Price is Right” bowels edition. The music
> started, Bob Barker and his lovely vixens were on,
> and all of the products to guess the prices on
> were castor oil, witch hazel, wet towelettes,
> Preparation H. Even the models were bloated and
> doubled over, and Bob admitted to during taping,
> dropping a fifty pound bag of cement on his
> California groan throne. He also said to spay or
> neuter your pets, so future ones may not have IBS.
> All of the contestants bid on groan thrones, the
> cost of rude doctor visits, or blenders that mixed
> all kinds of foods to show what ones bowels has to
> contend with. It was a really good dream, and I
> hope that the nice lady won her bid on tbd bottle
> of Metamucil.


Get Help

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Bratwurst King ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:53AM

Get help for what. The man had a dream and wrote it down. What kind of help do you think he needs? I’m really enjoying these. Although not as much as you. Twice?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Easy from now on ()
Date: May 22, 2020 10:58AM

Bratwurst King Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Get help for what. The man had a dream and wrote
> it down. What kind of help do you think he needs?
> I’m really enjoying these. Although not as much
> as you. Twice?

Dreams are the windows to the soul. Brown Onion's dreams show he has poopy in his soul.

BTW, sometimes FFXU.does post things twice.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Price is Wrong Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:01AM

No fantasies about giving birth to feces babies with the help of midwives or celebrities singing to you in your small bathroom while you take a prolonged shit.

Your dreams are more sane than your waking accounts of bathroom experiences. Let that soak in.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Medical image of healthy bowels ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:14AM

Her bowels - discuss


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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: BO sock puppets ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:18AM

Re: Country Fried Bowels
Posted by: Uncle Earnie ()
Date: May 21, 2020 05:43PM

Last episode onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I wanna hear the story how bathroom sniffer Uncle
> Ernie died from model train accident at home...

My Uncle Ernie (guy who stalked Kresge Dept store mens rooms in the 60's) - mom always told me he died of a heart attack at home. Years later after my mom had passed my dad told me the truth. Turns out Uncle Ernie died in a fire at home. He had been working in his hobby room on his quite elaborate HO scale model train table. He had been drinking and fell asleep on the table. The transformer voltage wasnt enough to harm him but it apparently made him twitch enough to knock over some Testor's model paint near an ashtray. That ignited some painting rags and model glue.

He woke in time to get out of the basement but unfortunately he had fallen asleep on the table after laying down a considerable amount of glue and powdered model grass and lichen. With the entire hobby table stuck to his back he was able to struggle off the saw horses they were sitting on but with the plywood glued to his bare skin he was unable to get through the door before he was overcome by the smoke.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Boiled Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:24AM

Ham and cheese sandwiches on white bread, potato chips, soda. Take that bowels.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:35AM

Wondering about those marks on her rump. Wondering if the football team tagged? Either way a nice looking woman. Her age, smile, and drinking the beer looking very relaxed she’s probably got 20 to 30 years before her bowels betray her.

Wish the weather was good, as it would be great to be out on a boat someday. I’d worry about flooding the bilge. But could be a nice way to spend a day.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Spring Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 11:43AM

Dad is really strange. The obese neighbor went back to his house. The grill is still on, but dads crying. He’s wearing nothing but bikini bottoms and a bra in the backyard, with high heels. I don’t know what to say to him. Grandma is out in her station wagon selling jenkum, and mom is going to make me a healthy lunch. What should I say to dad?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Dr. Phil Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 12:23PM

Spring Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dad is really strange. The obese neighbor went
> back to his house. The grill is still on, but dads
> crying. He’s wearing nothing but bikini bottoms
> and a bra in the backyard, with high heels. I
> don’t know what to say to him. Grandma is out in
> her station wagon selling jenkum, and mom is going
> to make me a healthy lunch. What should I say to
> dad?


Just ask him "what's up?" or "do you need anything?" and let him steer the conversation. As long as he doesn't ask you to participate in some father/son shave rape with the Gardner boy, you should be good.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Mr Brown Underwear ()
Date: May 22, 2020 01:05PM

I wish my office had more than one bathroom for 15 people. It’s unfair to have it like this. Isn’t there a law that more than one?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: deermeat ()
Date: May 22, 2020 01:19PM

BO sock puppets Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Re: Country Fried Bowels
> Posted by: Uncle Earnie ()
> Date: May 21, 2020 05:43PM
>
> Last episode onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I wanna hear the story how bathroom sniffer
> Uncle
> > Ernie died from model train accident at home...
>
> My Uncle Ernie (guy who stalked Kresge Dept store
> mens rooms in the 60's) - mom always told me he
> died of a heart attack at home. Years later after
> my mom had passed my dad told me the truth. Turns
> out Uncle Ernie died in a fire at home. He had
> been working in his hobby room on his quite
> elaborate HO scale model train table. He had been
> drinking and fell asleep on the table. The
> transformer voltage wasnt enough to harm him but
> it apparently made him twitch enough to knock over
> some Testor's model paint near an ashtray. That
> ignited some painting rags and model glue.
>
> He woke in time to get out of the basement but
> unfortunately he had fallen asleep on the table
> after laying down a considerable amount of glue
> and powdered model grass and lichen. With the
> entire hobby table stuck to his back he was able
> to struggle off the saw horses they were sitting
> on but with the plywood glued to his bare skin he
> was unable to get through the door before he was
> overcome by the smoke.

Sounds like your bathroom-sniffing perv Uncle was a fucking idiot. Just like you

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Lonely Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 01:39PM

I am unable to look women in their face.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Was this done with mirrors? ()
Date: May 22, 2020 01:46PM

Johnny Olsen: You really haven't been pegged until you have gotten the business end of this Anal Invader by Ramco. It is all yours if the Price is Right!!!
Attachments:
filffff.gif

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: tumbleintothe void onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 02:01PM

^not bowel friendly

not at all

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 02:03PM

Mr Brown Underwear Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I wish my office had more than one bathroom for 15
> people. It’s unfair to have it like this.
> Isn’t there a law that more than one?


If memory serves me right, we looked up metro’s lack of bathrooms. Still no word from Congressman Connolly for every mile groan throne stations on 66. It really should be a Americans with Disabilities Act protection. Yet the loopholes and lack of response from our congressional representative concerns me. Each time I call the staff member sounds like my doctors office. Basically “we’re looking into it.” But words don’t mean anything.

Is there a way you could keep towels or a large trash can by your cubicle?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Rusty Craplace ()
Date: May 22, 2020 02:17PM

Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mr Brown Underwear Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I wish my office had more than one bathroom for
> 15
> > people. It’s unfair to have it like this.
> > Isn’t there a law that more than one?
>
>
> If memory serves me right, we looked up metro’s
> lack of bathrooms. Still no word from Congressman
> Connolly for every mile groan throne stations on
> 66. It really should be a Americans with
> Disabilities Act protection. Yet the loopholes and
> lack of response from our congressional
> representative concerns me. Each time I call the
> staff member sounds like my doctors office.
> Basically “we’re looking into it.” But words
> don’t mean anything.
>
> Is there a way you could keep towels or a large
> trash can by your cubicle?

stfu Clarence - asshole. Why not visit your sick brother instead of posting this nonsense?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Rusty Craplace ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:06PM

Imitation again. Funny actually.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Wally Joyner ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:09PM

Rusty Craplace Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Imitation again. Funny actually.


Shut up bitch!

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Fare Fax ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:40PM

Wally Joyner Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Rusty Craplace Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Imitation again. Funny actually.
>
>
> Shut up bitch!

I have never seen a site where so many people pretend they are things they are not.


I have just found out the person with the registered name 'Brown Onion' is not who he claims to be on this forum. He is actually named 'Aaron' and is in his early 30s. He is a post-op tranny born 'Erin'.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Hi William. ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:42PM

William Moreno Arrest Record


William Robert Moreno
Moreno, William Robert
aliases: Frank Krow, Frank_Krow, Mr. Misery, Miz, jimmylegs, Voodooslut

known associates: Christopher James Tator, Chris Tator, Tator Tots

https://wtvr.com/2015/07/25/richmond-man-at-the-center-of-a-reign-of-terror-cyber-bulling-lawsuit/














William Moreno aka Mr. Misery aka Miz aka Frank Krow is a pedophile. There weren't just one or two posts, but enough to establish a clear and solid pattern. William Moreno also lived with a twice-convicted child molester named Christopher J, Tator, who he helped to evade the sex offender registry requirements. Chris Tator is now back in federal prison.

Quote
William Robert Moreno
some children are very fuckable, let's face it
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/621151/621429.html#msg-621429

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I just fucked a baby in its tight little asshole. And he loved every minute of it.

allegedly.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/656161/656214.html#msg-656214

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I'm about to fuck a baby in his soft spot.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/636834.html#msg-636834

Quote
William Robert Moreno
what, you don't wanna help me fuck this baby? we could do double penetration on this toddler bitch. one in each hole. lookit this little slut. she's just beggin' for it. watta fuckin whore.

suck mah dick bee-yotch.....
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/636852.html#msg-636852

Quote
William Robert Moreno
one time, I was fucking this baby up the ass, it was crying so I started shaking it. It stopped crying, I came inside it, put it back in its crib, then climbed out the window. I wonder what ever happened to that baby.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/636766.html#msg-636766

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I ate out a toddler's asshole tonight.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/636769.html#msg-636769

Quote
William Robert Moreno
hamtaro, wanna help me fuck this baby?
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/632214.html#msg-632214

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I raped a baby
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/621151/625583.html#msg-625583

Quote
William Robert Moreno
just got done fucking this baby......man was he sweet. I gave him a reach-around in his sweet little soft spot. It was soooooooooooooooo hot.

we watched Zooballee Zoo after I finished.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/632140/633879.html#msg-633879

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I just fucked a baby...it was consensual
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/619156/625479.html#msg-625479
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/619156/626553.html#msg-626553

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I wish I could have a baby.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/506690/506705.html#msg-506705

Quote
William Robert Moreno
by the way, I just got done getting a blowjob from a 3 month-old, so I'm all tuckered out........see you guise tomaorrow.
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/484700/648453.html#msg-648453

Quote
William Robert Moreno
I don't care if they are underage, I'll still fuck 'em. I'll rape all their highschool boy asses, one by one. I'll cum in each and every one of their gay boy asses, then we'll see who's gay. ... I'll tell ya that much, muchacho!!! I'LL BUTTFUCK EVERY ONE OF YA! 15, 16, 17, DOESN'T MATTER! I'LL ASS-RAPE YOU! I'M A FUCKING MAD MAN! I'LL FUCK ANYTHING THAT MOVES! ASK ANYONE ROUND HERE!
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/637654/637753.html#msg-637753

Quote
William Robert Moreno
like, can you get in trouble in any way for just buying a copy of Tiger Beat? If you were a grown man let's say, and you were slightly overweight and had a beard and large glasses and you look a little funny, and you just went into a Walgreens and bought nothing but a copy of Tiger Beat....and maybe also a box of condoms. Could you get arrested based solely on your purchase? Is that probable cause or something? Or if you bought a Kidz Bop CD. Anything like that. If a grown man bought something of that sort, and he looked a little ugly and odd maybe, could he hypothetically get arrested for that?
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/777495/777618.html#msg-777618

Quote
William Robert Moreno
is it illegal for a grown man to attempt to have a serious conversation with a kindergarten child about politics or religion, if they are not related and just happen to be sitting next to each other on a park bench or something? Is it really illegal?
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/777495/777624.html#msg-777624

Quote
William Robert Moreno
can a grown man and a little girl, unrelated and strangers to each other, have dinner together at a fancy restaurant? Legally? Let's say they meet outside the gym or something and decide to have dinner together, and that's it. That is the extent of the interaction. Is it illegal?
http://www.fairfaxunderground.com/forum/read/40/777495/777625.html#msg-777625



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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Fed up Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:44PM

poor eesh, reduced to shedding his Brown Onion persona to attack the fat retard. How is Chapter 7 Mike?

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Wiener ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:51PM

They still give away lifetime supply of Kikkoman soy sauce as a consolation gift? Oh, and bowels are pretty good.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Hi William. ()
Date: May 22, 2020 03:53PM

Fed up Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> poor eesh, reduced to shedding his Brown Onion
> persona to attack the fat retard. How is Chapter
> 7 Mike?

Try harder Miz, try harder

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Cum on down ()
Date: May 22, 2020 04:05PM

How are your bowels?
Attachments:
IMG_6984.GIF

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion likes this content ()
Date: May 22, 2020 05:17PM

...
Attachments:
broeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.gif

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: toasted onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 05:25PM

Happy Memorial day weekend BiB's! Lets take time to think about our Vets who fought and died to protect our rights. Just imagine how bad it would be to have bowel trouble in a combat situation. God bless all our Vets.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:05PM

toasted onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Happy Memorial day weekend BiB's! Lets take time
> to think about our Vets who fought and died to
> protect our rights. Just imagine how bad it would
> be to have bowel trouble in a combat situation.
> God bless all our Vets.


Thank you and thankfully I was in combat as a young man. My guess is the military has age requirements for the inevitable bowel betrayal. This can affect readiness.

Who the hell is this creepy looking guys photograph? Does he have bad bowels? My guess is yes.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Boiled Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:12PM

40 chicken pieces from Bonchon. Take that bowels.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Rusty Craplace ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:14PM

Clarence your brother is having problems - spend some time helping instead of using his account to post here. Call Matilda why dont you? I bet you dont even know he fainted today and hit his head hard on the tile wall in the bathroom. Warafin induced hypotension caused him to pass out while on the toilet. The nurse doesnt think he will need stitches but he is having trouble speaking again.

I just wish all of this nonsense here using his account would stop until he is well enough to come on and post on his own without his asshole brother acting like an idiot.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Rusty Craplace ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:28PM

Rusty Craplace Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Clarence your brother is having problems - spend
> some time helping instead of using his account to
> post here. Call Matilda why dont you? I bet you
> dont even know he fainted today and hit his head
> hard on the tile wall in the bathroom. Warafin
> induced hypotension caused him to pass out while
> on the toilet. The nurse doesnt think he will
> need stitches but he is having trouble speaking
> again.
>
> I just wish all of this nonsense here using his
> account would stop until he is well enough to come
> on and post on his own without his asshole brother
> acting like an idiot.


Funny! Not true but actually hilarious.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Brown Onion ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:40PM

I sit here laughing. The person pretending to be Rusty is amusing. Very well done.

It’s a shame that Bob Barker, or Drew Carey who looks like he has AIDS, won’t do a IBS related episode. Bid on castor oil, Metamucil, and even bring up IBS instead of talking about spaying pets. One day without talking about snipping a dog or cats testicles. That is unpleasant, it would be better to discuss those who’s colons are hanging on by a thread instead.

A housewife or home maker, is watching Price is Right, and can learn about ulcerative colitis or 40 feet of intestines flaring up. So when her white husband comes home, she can have the sitz bath and witch hazel at the ready. Progress. This absolutely would be and probably would decrease divorce numbers.

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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Miz Sucks ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:46PM























































































































































































































































































































































































































































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Re: Price is Right Bowels Edition
Posted by: Miz is a Retard ()
Date: May 22, 2020 06:46PM























































































































































































































































































































































































































































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