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Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: Former Midget ()
Date: February 04, 2010 04:43PM

I am worried that many of our local midgets and dwarfs will get lost in the upcoming snowstorm prejected to be up to 24 inches.

Are midgets allowed outside in snowstorms? Should they be allowed to walk the streets or get buried in the mounds of snow.

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: Bobbie Francis McDonnell(R) ()
Date: February 04, 2010 04:46PM

Former Midget,

Thank you for your concern. I will issue an executive order for a state of emergency in Virginia for all of my vertically challenged constituents.

For the time being, I would recommend wearing bright colored clothing and a pair of 4-inch heels in order to stand out of the crowd.

Help is on the way.

Canker Sorely,
Bobbie Francis McDonnell(R)

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: Lollipop Guildmaster ()
Date: February 04, 2010 04:59PM

Someone better warn the Wedderburn residents...wherever they are now.

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: ThePackLeader ()
Date: February 04, 2010 08:07PM

I have snowshoes, and I would recommend that any midget invest in a pair, ASAP. Also, be sure to wear a pole strapped to your back with a bright orange flag (Like the ones at the fire hydrants). Last but not least, I am not liable for any vehicular on midget incidents, as I cannot reliably drive through this much snow, while trying to pay attention for underlying little people. If you see an SUV heading your way though, wave as much as you can to create attention, but if it doesn't work, just hit the deck and pray that my 4Runner has enough clearance for your smaller stature.

If you are stuck in the snow, leave us a message on here, and I'll attempt to uncover you with my midget hunting, er, I mean recovery dogs.

==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: Spastic Psoriasis ()
Date: February 04, 2010 11:16PM

Bobbie Francis McDonnell(R) Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Former Midget,
>
> Thank you for your concern. I will issue an
> executive order for a state of emergency in
> Virginia for all of my vertically challenged
> constituents.
>
> For the time being, I would recommend wearing
> bright colored clothing and a pair of 4-inch heels
> in order to stand out of the crowd.
>
> Help is on the way.
>
> Canker Sorely,
> Bobbie Francis McDonnell(R)

That's §tupid

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: WashingTone-Locian ()
Date: February 04, 2010 11:18PM

I understand being buried by a blizzard is the greatest honor that can be achieved by a midget. I wouldn't worry. They like it.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

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Re: Worried about Midgets in Upcoming Snowstorm
Posted by: Opus ()
Date: February 04, 2010 11:32PM

I suggest the bicycle flags.
Attachments:
midgetflags.gif

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