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Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
ThePackLeader
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:14AM
Hey, let's give it up, who in here just loves the DMV?
I've been up over 30 hours straight, because I stayed up all night so I could make it to the local DMV early in the morning before the lines formed. I got there at 7:30AM, and I was the second in line. I made it in there at 8AM (As soon as they opened), I was given a number, and they immediately called me up to a window. I hand over the paper work for my license renewal, and everything is going smoothly, they then take my photo (I asked the lady "So we're not allowed to smile", she replies "No", so then I light-heartedly said "Just a little smile?", and she keeps this arrogantly stern face and says "NO". Then the next booth over I hear another clerk tell a customer "It's cool to smile a little". I'm thinking, "Ok, wtf is wrong with this woman, she has no personality apparently". I just smirked for the damn photo in the end).
Then they requested that I take the Vision test. That is where everything went to shit. I looked into the damn device, and I couldn't see a damn thing because of the glare from the light right over my head. I tried to block the light out of the scope, but I couldn't (The lady had taped some pos block to the push-button which activates the light inside the vision test tube, and because of it I couldn't push my face far enough into it to block out the interfering florescent light right over my head). I told the lady that the reflection was screwing with the test, but she insisted that I try to read a line. I read the line, and the asian chick blurts out "NoNo, You get wrong, you get wrong". It turns out that I mistook an "R" for a "P", and because of that she insisted that I was all wrong. I then stated it correctly, and she started saying "NoNo, Still Wong". I then let my family member take a look at the test (He has 20/20 vision), and he confirmed that I had it correct. I also mentioned that the entire right side of the test was faded beyond recognition. The lady didn't believe me, so my pal then looked at it, and he too confirmed that the pos test was all faded and unreadable right down the entire third column. The clerk didn't believe us, so he turned the scope towards her and said "Take a look for yourself lady", but she refused to, and instead said "I know it by memory, I know correctly".
So they have me move to another scope, which again is smack dab under a bright light (A few of the others were away from the overhead lights). The biggest problem was the dumb block she again taped to the push-in button, and she acted like it was required. She then asked me to read a line, and another lady said I had to get two columns of one line correct, and I'd pass. I read the entire thing correctly, and then when I look up another lady is standing there, because the other two disappeared. Then the asian woman pops back, and she insists (Against what the supervisor said), that I had to now read two columns of two lines correctly. I began to read the letters aloud, and I had them correct, and again when I look up ANOTHER woman is seated at the computer. She says "You got it wrong", then the other person with me looked at it themselves, and they confirmed that I actually had it correct. Then the original won-ton woman comes back, and she says "Well, but you took too long, so you need to see a doctor before we pass you".
Wtf, so I drove to two different Optometrist offices, both of which were closed (Meanwhile I'm getting caught in multiple downpours, and ice storms). I finally drive ALL the way back to my own part of town, and then I find an open Optometrist. Fortunately he takes me without an appointment, and he tests me (This is my first trip to an Optometrist). I tell him about the entire DMV ordeal, and he says "They don't even know what they're talking about". I take some vision tests (Mind you I had been up for nearly 24 hours straight at this point), and I come out with a result of mild nearsighted, BUT within the normal range of vision (Meaning that I'm not "Impaired" in any way). He recommends that I get a pair of glasses to simply take the strain off of my eyes, and says that they will obviously improve my distance vision when driving and such, but he checks off every box on the paperwork which declares me fit to drive. In other words, although my vision isn't 20/20, it's well within the accepted limits for driving (My vision even surpasses the MIL Medical Exam Requirements). Lol at first I thought that I had serious problems with my vision when he mentioned "glasses", but then he enlarged one letter on the screen until it was freaking huge from my vantage point, and he said that he sees folks younger than me walk in, who can't even clearly see something like that. I feel sorry for those folks for real.
Anyways, so after this we have to stop off at my family members place of employment to pick up some paperwork for a teleconference later in the day, and then we finally make it back to the DMV. We have to wait in line now, and naturally they call the numbers up all out of order. I saw the same bitches from earlier in the day, and I was quite literally praying not to have to deal with them again. Finally, they call my number, and I get a really cool Indian dude. He takes my paperwork, checks me off, and I was out of the booth within five minutes with my temporary license, and my permanent license on the way from Richmond.
Btw, I couldn't even believe the entire "Vision Fiasco", because as I was sitting in my house after this entire madhouse of events, I could clearly make out a small Chickadee bird on a tree branch 100 yards through the woods from my house (Through the window). Not to mention that I'm an Expert Marksman, and I can practically thread a needle with a bullet (The part that pissed me off most though, was how everytime I got a part of the DMV test correct, another person would pop-up out of nowhere and insist that there were more requirements. This is especially frustrating given the fact that a few years back I took the same vision test, and I passed with flying colors (They didn't put those stupid blocks on the push button back then, and an entire column wasn't faded beyond recognition either) ). The bottom line is that the first group of DMV clerks were all royal assholes, and it took the time and money of finding an Optometrist to finally bypass their dumbassedness so that I could finally renew my license. I talked to a friend about this later, and he actually had the same problem at his DMV office as well (The person behind the desk was in a bitchy mood, and they kept trying to insist that he failed the vision test. When he found another clerk though, they passed him).
==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).
I've been up over 30 hours straight, because I stayed up all night so I could make it to the local DMV early in the morning before the lines formed. I got there at 7:30AM, and I was the second in line. I made it in there at 8AM (As soon as they opened), I was given a number, and they immediately called me up to a window. I hand over the paper work for my license renewal, and everything is going smoothly, they then take my photo (I asked the lady "So we're not allowed to smile", she replies "No", so then I light-heartedly said "Just a little smile?", and she keeps this arrogantly stern face and says "NO". Then the next booth over I hear another clerk tell a customer "It's cool to smile a little". I'm thinking, "Ok, wtf is wrong with this woman, she has no personality apparently". I just smirked for the damn photo in the end).
Then they requested that I take the Vision test. That is where everything went to shit. I looked into the damn device, and I couldn't see a damn thing because of the glare from the light right over my head. I tried to block the light out of the scope, but I couldn't (The lady had taped some pos block to the push-button which activates the light inside the vision test tube, and because of it I couldn't push my face far enough into it to block out the interfering florescent light right over my head). I told the lady that the reflection was screwing with the test, but she insisted that I try to read a line. I read the line, and the asian chick blurts out "NoNo, You get wrong, you get wrong". It turns out that I mistook an "R" for a "P", and because of that she insisted that I was all wrong. I then stated it correctly, and she started saying "NoNo, Still Wong". I then let my family member take a look at the test (He has 20/20 vision), and he confirmed that I had it correct. I also mentioned that the entire right side of the test was faded beyond recognition. The lady didn't believe me, so my pal then looked at it, and he too confirmed that the pos test was all faded and unreadable right down the entire third column. The clerk didn't believe us, so he turned the scope towards her and said "Take a look for yourself lady", but she refused to, and instead said "I know it by memory, I know correctly".
So they have me move to another scope, which again is smack dab under a bright light (A few of the others were away from the overhead lights). The biggest problem was the dumb block she again taped to the push-in button, and she acted like it was required. She then asked me to read a line, and another lady said I had to get two columns of one line correct, and I'd pass. I read the entire thing correctly, and then when I look up another lady is standing there, because the other two disappeared. Then the asian woman pops back, and she insists (Against what the supervisor said), that I had to now read two columns of two lines correctly. I began to read the letters aloud, and I had them correct, and again when I look up ANOTHER woman is seated at the computer. She says "You got it wrong", then the other person with me looked at it themselves, and they confirmed that I actually had it correct. Then the original won-ton woman comes back, and she says "Well, but you took too long, so you need to see a doctor before we pass you".
Wtf, so I drove to two different Optometrist offices, both of which were closed (Meanwhile I'm getting caught in multiple downpours, and ice storms). I finally drive ALL the way back to my own part of town, and then I find an open Optometrist. Fortunately he takes me without an appointment, and he tests me (This is my first trip to an Optometrist). I tell him about the entire DMV ordeal, and he says "They don't even know what they're talking about". I take some vision tests (Mind you I had been up for nearly 24 hours straight at this point), and I come out with a result of mild nearsighted, BUT within the normal range of vision (Meaning that I'm not "Impaired" in any way). He recommends that I get a pair of glasses to simply take the strain off of my eyes, and says that they will obviously improve my distance vision when driving and such, but he checks off every box on the paperwork which declares me fit to drive. In other words, although my vision isn't 20/20, it's well within the accepted limits for driving (My vision even surpasses the MIL Medical Exam Requirements). Lol at first I thought that I had serious problems with my vision when he mentioned "glasses", but then he enlarged one letter on the screen until it was freaking huge from my vantage point, and he said that he sees folks younger than me walk in, who can't even clearly see something like that. I feel sorry for those folks for real.
Anyways, so after this we have to stop off at my family members place of employment to pick up some paperwork for a teleconference later in the day, and then we finally make it back to the DMV. We have to wait in line now, and naturally they call the numbers up all out of order. I saw the same bitches from earlier in the day, and I was quite literally praying not to have to deal with them again. Finally, they call my number, and I get a really cool Indian dude. He takes my paperwork, checks me off, and I was out of the booth within five minutes with my temporary license, and my permanent license on the way from Richmond.
Btw, I couldn't even believe the entire "Vision Fiasco", because as I was sitting in my house after this entire madhouse of events, I could clearly make out a small Chickadee bird on a tree branch 100 yards through the woods from my house (Through the window). Not to mention that I'm an Expert Marksman, and I can practically thread a needle with a bullet (The part that pissed me off most though, was how everytime I got a part of the DMV test correct, another person would pop-up out of nowhere and insist that there were more requirements. This is especially frustrating given the fact that a few years back I took the same vision test, and I passed with flying colors (They didn't put those stupid blocks on the push button back then, and an entire column wasn't faded beyond recognition either) ). The bottom line is that the first group of DMV clerks were all royal assholes, and it took the time and money of finding an Optometrist to finally bypass their dumbassedness so that I could finally renew my license. I talked to a friend about this later, and he actually had the same problem at his DMV office as well (The person behind the desk was in a bitchy mood, and they kept trying to insist that he failed the vision test. When he found another clerk though, they passed him).
==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
Numbers
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:27AM
I feel your pain PL. I just had the same thing happen to me yesterday at the DMV at Fair Oaks. I looked into the scope and I immediately thought, "I'm fucked!" The lines were really small and blurry. The guy told me to read the top line and I pretty much had to guess it. Apparently I guessed wrong because he told me to have a go at the bottom line, which was equally blurry. Again I guessed at it and again I must have guessed wrong because he then told me to close one eye at try it again.
When it was all said and done, I'm pretty sure I failed the vision test miserably, but fortunately I had struck up a conversation with the guy about photography and cameras and I guess it gave me some positive leverage because he muttered, "close enough".
BTW, the camera they use is a Canon G9 and a Speedlight flash.
License is in the mail, woohoo!
When it was all said and done, I'm pretty sure I failed the vision test miserably, but fortunately I had struck up a conversation with the guy about photography and cameras and I guess it gave me some positive leverage because he muttered, "close enough".
BTW, the camera they use is a Canon G9 and a Speedlight flash.
License is in the mail, woohoo!
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
eesh
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:35AM
Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> BTW, the camera they use is a Canon G9 and a
> Speedlight flash.
>
Nobody asked.
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> BTW, the camera they use is a Canon G9 and a
> Speedlight flash.
>
Nobody asked.
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
bloody blisters
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:37AM
the DMV is not my favorite place to be. although if you have to wait around(which you normally do) you see some interesting folks. when i go, i prepare for battle. i'll bring my SS card, birth certificate, 2 forms of ID, and blood, piss, and semen samples, even a bacteria culture from under my finger nails. once im there i dont want to come back. i have never had any problems with the vision test but those forehead push buttons gross me out. think of how many nasty ass people come in hacking their lungs out or the oil field teens who press their greasy faces in there. you know they dont sterilize that shit after each use.
that sucks. please dont hit my car foureyes. i digress, my eyes did get a little blurry reading your story, it may be the opium, oh great i digress further.
what i hate is waiting for your license, they give you a stupid paper license and hole punch your old one when they could print your official license right then and there. way to go DMV
that sucks. please dont hit my car foureyes. i digress, my eyes did get a little blurry reading your story, it may be the opium, oh great i digress further.
what i hate is waiting for your license, they give you a stupid paper license and hole punch your old one when they could print your official license right then and there. way to go DMV
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
eesh
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:37AM
I just got my new license, they say it will arrive 7-10 business days; I got mine three days later.
Blessed are the murderous.
Blessed are the murderous.
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
bloody blisters
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:38AM
yeah i got mine in about 5 days or so
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
eesh
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:39AM
bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> when i go, i
> prepare for battle. i'll bring my SS card, birth
> certificate, 2 forms of ID, and blood, piss, and
> semen samples, even a bacteria culture from under
> my finger nails.
No stool sample?
Blessed are the murderous.
-------------------------------------------------------
> when i go, i
> prepare for battle. i'll bring my SS card, birth
> certificate, 2 forms of ID, and blood, piss, and
> semen samples, even a bacteria culture from under
> my finger nails.
No stool sample?
Blessed are the murderous.
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
bloody blisters
()
Date: January 23, 2010 12:40AM
eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
>
> No stool sample?
no, i went to the DMV express
-------------------------------------------------------
>
>
> No stool sample?
no, i went to the DMV express
Re: Much Love For The DMV
Posted by:
Vince(!)
()
Date: January 28, 2010 08:14PM
I'd rather get my drivers ID mailed to me anyway. The eye exam part is annoying but at least I dont have to take a written exam again.