Off-Topic :
Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
A few months ago, I was walking home from Kroger's supermarket and I happened to pass by the house where Meade Skelton lives. As I got closer, I heard these strange animal-like noises that were coming from the basement door, which leads down to Meade's room. I went over to take a look and suddenly realized they were cries of extreme, gratifying pleasure. Curious, I peeked in the window to see what on earth was going on. I thought maybe he had a woman down there for the first time. Oh boy was I wrong...
The windows were kind of foggy and all I could hear were simultaneous "Oh Gods!" I slowly cracked open the door and I saw something so sick, so vile, that I will never forget it if I live to the year 3000. What I saw would make the devil himself vomit.
I had caught Meade Skelton and Michael Basl in the act of defecating on each other's chests, licking off the poo with fiery passion. They then proceeded to engage in rough and unbridled anal sex. They tongued each other's buttholes so squeaky clean you could see your reflection. When it reached climax, they were covered in sweat and squealing like tortured pigs. Dingleberries were flying everywhere. It was so intense that a shrapnel of foreskin hit me in the eye and blinded me.
It was then that I decided to close the door, run away, and never look back. Unfortunately, I could not hold it in any longer and I had to tell the world what I witnessed. Even though the secret is out now, the memory of that beastly act still haunts me to this day. My life will never be the same after what happened. The nightmares continue to persist. I don't believe I can ever recover from this, although my therapist says there is still hope. I will be returning to the church so that the Lord may help me through this crisis.
Edited 5 time(s). Last edit at 04/11/2017 10:59PM by Dookie Monster.
UPDATE: Still trying to get over the event that's burned into my memory eternally. I'm doing better now thanks to massive amounts of psychological and physical therapy.