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I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Dookie Monster ()
Date: November 18, 2016 04:10PM

A few months ago, I was walking home from Kroger's supermarket and I happened to pass by the house where Meade Skelton lives. As I got closer, I heard these strange animal-like noises that were coming from the basement door, which leads down to Meade's room. I went over to take a look and suddenly realized they were cries of extreme gratifying pleasure. Curious, I peeked in the window to see what on earth was going on. I thought maybe he had a woman down there for the first time. Boy was I wrong...

The windows were kind of foggy and all I could hear were simultaneous "Oh Gods!" I slowly cracked open the door and I saw something so sick, so vile, that I will never forget it if I live to the year 3000. What I saw would make the devil himself vomit.

I had caught Meade Skelton and Michael Basl defecating on each other's chests, licking off the poo with fiery passion. They then proceeded to engage in rough and unbridled anal sex. They tongued each other's buttholes so squeaky clean you could see your reflection. By the end, the two were covered in sweat and squealing like tortured pigs. Dingleberries were flying everywhere. It was so intense that a shrapnel of foreskin hit me in the eye and blinded me.

It was then that I decided to close the door, run away, and never look back. Unfortunately, I could not hold it in any longer and I had to tell the world what I witnessed. Even though the secret is out now, the memory of that beastly act still haunts me to this day. My life will never be the same after what happened. The nightmares continue to persist. I don't believe I can ever recover from this, although my therapist says there is still hope. I will be returning to the church so that the Lord may help me through this crisis.





Edited 4 time(s). Last edit at 03/12/2017 01:25AM by Dookie Monster.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Epic Fail ()
Date: November 18, 2016 04:22PM

Epic fail on your attempt to be humorous. Back to the drawing board.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Dookie Monster ()
Date: November 18, 2016 04:27PM

Epic Fail Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Epic fail on your attempt to be humorous. Back to
> the drawing board.


This is a true story bro.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Den Mother ()
Date: November 18, 2016 04:34PM

You poor thing. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Ds3rtt ()
Date: November 19, 2016 07:16AM

Him and Eesh do that all the time. Iys not newsworthy.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: HELLO MIZ ()
Date: November 19, 2016 10:19AM

OP is Miz...spinning new yarns...

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Dookie Monster ()
Date: November 19, 2016 07:02PM

UPDATE: Still trying to get over the event that's burned into my memory eternally. I'm doing better now thanks to massive amounts of psychological and physical therapy.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Oscar the Grouch ()
Date: November 19, 2016 10:03PM

This is a sad story.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Goldstein ()
Date: November 19, 2016 10:05PM

What is this meme?

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Concerned person ()
Date: November 22, 2016 01:19PM

Meade has issues.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Whacker ()
Date: November 22, 2016 02:03PM

I beat off multiple times reading this over and over! Anyone got an ice scarper? I need to clean off my screen!

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Fake spotter ()
Date: November 23, 2016 08:27AM

This is a fake story. Meade would never have sex.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Dookie Monster ()
Date: November 27, 2016 12:26PM

Fake spotter Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> This is a fake story. Meade would never have sex.


Only with a guy bruh

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: Phil Lacio ()
Date: November 28, 2016 06:33PM


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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: I know something ()
Date: December 07, 2016 12:50PM

eesh was the other man.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: bumperman ()
Date: December 13, 2016 09:34PM

bump

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: OP is indeed miz ()
Date: December 13, 2016 11:13PM

HELLO MIZ Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> OP is Miz...spinning new yarns...


He 'Edited 3 time(s)' in a feeble attempt to frame Gerry2.

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: TeLVj ()
Date: January 08, 2017 03:38PM

this is disturbing

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Posted by:    ()
Date: February 17, 2017 12:57AM

 

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You need to KILL YOURSELF
Posted by: Nigslayer ()
Date: February 17, 2017 03:53PM

.....
Attachments:
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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: nmJcY ()
Date: March 12, 2017 01:19AM

nmJcY

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Re: I can't keep this in the closet any longer!
Posted by: tl'dr ()
Date: March 12, 2017 11:01PM

tl'dr

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