22 ways to be a liberal Democrat

You know you are liberal if

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical documented changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to r ead is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion of the Christ for financial gain only.

12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison & A.G. Bell.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very nice person.

17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.

19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese Government is somehow in the best interest to the United States.

21. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right wing conspiracy.

22. You have to believe that it's okay to give Federal workers off on Christmas Day but it's not okay to say "Merry Christmas."

Go sling your mud in the pigpen where you belong. SQUEAL LIKE A PIG! OINK OINK! -§

You were so good last night. You made me squeal like a pig; all your boyfriends feel the same!

Riiight. Like Bush's approval rating and the federal deficit, your jokes are underwater. -§

His approval rating is low because people like you just don't get it;)

What did he say when Couric interviewed him last week? Something to the effect of "the hardest part of my job is attempting to establish a connection between Saddam and al Qaeda." Fucking brilliant.

ya rly
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That's a good one Meep. -§

The best part is that it's actually a real authentic picture.

http://www.snopes.com/katrina/photos/disaster.asp



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/15/2006 12:51PM by TheMeeper.

I enjoy §'s Marxist views of life. You don't realize conservatives have the guts to call it for what it is. For example, first of all, George Bush is a POS, he is not a conservative and we are pissed with his budgets, border control, lack of immigration. We have the balls to call for what he is. Can you say the same for Bill Clinton and our local POS Cong Moron. If someone actually voted for either, you have no integrity or character. At least Bush stays with his convictions, but he is going to be one of our worst Presidents in the history of the Nation. If you know anything about the world, politics or Bush's NSS, he is a liberal. Look it up facists, turning the Arab/Islam world into democratic states is A LIBERAL VIEW OF THE WORLD!!! You should love this touchy feely approach to world problems.

The following was taken from Table S-11. Current Services Baseline Summary by Category (THE BUDGET FOR FISCAL YEAR 2006)

Discretionary:
DOD military 417
Homeland security 33
other 464
total 914

Mandatory:
SS 549
Medicare 340
Medicaid and SCHP 198
Other (welfare) 337
total 1,416

Note: interest is not included

If you want to take it down to your party line, and we all know you hate the military and homeland security.

The score:

Cons 914
Libs 1,416

Do the math; use facts!

The difference between the left and the right can be summed by one phrase.

Conservatives think the individual is the solution, the liberals think the government is the answer.

What do you think; please use substance, not touchy feely attacks like you normally do!

too long / didn't read

Meeper:

So if it's not an MTV snippet of info with all the substance of a Gummi Bear, you can't afford to waste your valuable time and dwindling number of brain cells?

Here's something more your size: Go Hillary!!

stupid-gun-named-guy,
   i think it was really a matter of being the same old drivel about how "Bush sucks!" that really just bores people into stop reading. however, the zealots backing the same drivel cant seem to get enough of it.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

Haven't watched MTV since the 80s you goddamn macaca, fuck Hillary.

19 ways you know you're a conservative Republican

You know you're conservative if

1. You're all for capital punishment, even on the mentally retarded.

2. You believe that businesses shouldn't have to pay taxes.

3. You believe that guns in the hands of known criminals are less of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology that King Bush I gave to Iraq.

4. You believe that the burning of gasoline has absolutely no effect on the environment.

5. You believe that we need an amendment to the Constitution to remind us what marriage is.

6. You believe that the AIDS virus is a gay disease.

7. You believe that the teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is just a pathetic teacher, not that education in this country is severely under-funded.

8. You believe that shooting quail with clipped wings who are trapped into a small, fenced-off area is completely fair and counts as a sport.

9. You believe that, if you have low self-esteem, a Hummer H2 is a complete cure.

10. You believe the NRA is good because it supports a Constitutional amendment intended to allow the formation of state militias and to give citizens the right to use a gun to hunt for food (there weren't any Food Lions back then), while fighting illegal wiretapping is bad even though it violates our right to privacy.

11. You believe that taxes are unnecessary, but are willing to spend billions of dollars our country DOESN'T HAVE on a war.

12. You believe that standardized tests are are the only way to measure whether our children is learning.

13. You believe that George W. Bush is normal and is a very nice person.

14. You believe that the only reason the Iraqi government isn't completely independent is because the right people haven't been in charge.

15. You believe that a president making up evidence as a reason to invade Iraq is ok, but a president getting a BJ is the worst thing to happen to America since ever.

16. You believe that homosexual parades that count as free speech should be banned, and manger scenes at Christmas should be endorsed by the government.

17. You believe that funding a war with money that doesn't exist is somehow in the best interest to the United States.

18. You believe that people who disagree with you don't count as American citizens.

19. You believe that it's okay to treat Christianity like it's the only religion that exists.

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WHERE'S THE BEEF

Well said, Nik. I wasn't going to waste my time on this guy, but I'm glad you did.

Here's an another:

20. You believe that the racial and ethnic tolerance is satisfied by the elevated image of Colin Powell and Condi Rice.

Cheers. -§

And you are a liberal if you believe the government can solve our problems just by raising taxes.

The first list was a demonstration of the numerous ironies that make the liberal position look contradictory and foolish. By comparison Nik's list was typical rambling hateful pap entirely devoid of wit - Bravo!

And then his little tag line at the end sounds like a deranged NRA battle creedo. Ahhh, so there's some irony after all.

And BTW, to inflict massive damage all weapons would likely be aimed at your post...

Have you ever noticed people that call them selves Liberal are the most intolerant, hateful people on the face of the earth.


I have also noticed the people on the left never fly an American flag. Everything they disagree with is positioned in hate.

If your great failed worldwide experiment of "Socialism" worked, Washington, DC, would be a Utopia. § and Nik, move and help out the people in SE. "Lead By Example", my guess is your the typical Marxist. Cheat on your taxes, live in your gated community, pretend to care about others; I guess it makes you feel better!

Don't get me wrong, I completely agree with you about self-labeled liberals...they think they have all the answers.

But have you have noticed how people who call themselves conservatives are the most smug, self-satisfied pricks on the planet?

The people on the right use the flag as a sword and shield. They happily send people to die when they don't have the brainpower or willpower to find another solution to the problem. They support Bush despite the fact that he goes against every basic ideal the Republican Party was supposed to stand for. Increasing the size and reach of government, decreasing personal freedom, disregarding basic rights and personal dignity.

And they seem ready to criticize others' opinions when they can't even come off as educated themselves... like using the words "your and you're" correctly.

Chris Rock was right. Anyone who uses either label to define themselves is a moron.

Look in the mirror next time before throwing stones. If you notice, most Republicans are pissed at Bush. Look at his ratings. Besides the lefts hate for America, please tell me what they stand for to include:

1. Budget
2. GWOT
3. Immigration
4. Taxes
5. Social Security
6. Medicare
7. Medicade
8. Outrageous taxes in Fairfax
9. The entitlement mentality
10. Education system (note John Stossel's eval of our education system)

They don't have a solution for any of it, except raise taxes and spend more money.

This is what the Left has given us for education: John Stossel looks at the ways the US public education system cheats students out of a quality education in "Stupid in America: How We Cheat Our Kids," ... Read it, listen to it before you comment!

http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Stossel/story?id=1500338

Would you blame the horriable state or our education system on conservative values or liberal values? Our school system represents the failure of the liberal view point to solve anything. Yes, this is also why I am pissed with Republicans, they may be are only hope, but they too are acting like the left.

Tell me, what is the solution?




Last sentence is a fragment (sorry, you didn't write a sentence).



The people on the right use the flag as a sword and shield. They happily send people to die when they don't have the brainpower or willpower to find another solution to the problem. They support Bush despite the fact that he goes against every basic ideal the Republican Party was supposed to stand for. Increasing the size and reach of government, decreasing personal freedom, disregarding basic rights and personal dignity.

Well, the survey that pgens posted labeled me as a liberal so I suppose I should defend myself and my fellow liberals.

For the most part Cong Barney Frank's list does not reflect my beliefs. Perhaps it is geared towards extreme die-hard democrats (I prefer not to affiliate myself with any party as they all have issues) but I really don't know where he is coming from. As far as I'm concerned, it is simply conservative propaganda.

I worked for a conservative think tank for 4 years. I do believe that most of the people I worked with sincerely wanted to make the country a better place. I just don't want to live in the country they want to create.

I have to wonder if the conservative party has become centered more on social conservatism than fiscal/personal responsibility (or if this is just Bush). That trend actually seems to go against the traditional conservative belief that government should be limited.

Granted, my personal beliefs are somewhat conflicted. On one hand, I believe that many social programs fail because they are under-funded. On the other hand, I believe that the government should be more fiscally responsible. Or as another example... I believe that we never should have invaded Iraq. But now that we are there, I believe we have a responsibility to help as long as our help is wanted. And social security- I have no idea what to make of that mess. But there is no doubt that I will always consider myself a liberal - I just can't understand social conservatives.

Tim45: You know you're a conservative if you believe the government can solve problems without any taxes at all.

burpgun: The "weak point for massive damage" thing is from Sony's E3 press conference. Ken Kutaragi is attacking a "giant enemy crab" in a battle that "actually took place".

Personal Responsibility: Kind of hard to move to SE when you're a college student.

Reston "Bong" Hit:
Education is terrible in this country because schools are underfunded. Do you think kids can actually learn in an overcrowded classroom in a school district where they can't afford to train teachers?

And how about immigration? The conservatives make it sound easy enough. Just find them all and kick them out. How do you find 2,000,000+ people and kick them out without paying for the manpower to do it? People don't work for free.

And with the budget, yeah, we're all about raising taxes and spending more money. Liberals spent so much, in fact, that under President Clinton, the country was on track to have the national debt paid off by 2008. Instead, our government is $8,490,332,110,380.67 in debt (source). Eight and a half trillion dollars. When Clinton was in office in 2000, the debt was $5,674,178,209,886.86. 5.7 trillion dollars. So the current administration has spent $2.8 trillion. And Bush still has another two years left to run our economy into the ground.

I'm done. Go ahead and tear my arguments apart.

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WHERE'S THE BEEF

Let me make something clear to Mr. Personal Responsibility:

It is entirely possible to be liberal, yet moderate; to be liberal and pro-corporate; while at the same time to be liberal and pro-God, regardless of religion. The difference is that people like myself understand that not everyone is afforded the same opportunities for achievement. There are many variables outside ones control which can determine whether one is able to excel.

Much of it has to do with luck.

For example, I consider myself lucky in that I was raised in the DC area and not a civil-war torn country. I consider myself lucky in that I was born into a family that was supportive and not abusive. I consider myself lucky that I'm of good health and not diseased or terminal. Each of these things contribute to my overall sense of well-being and fulfillment which helps me be "personally responsible" with my career, family and as a citizen.

Now imagine not having each of the three elements of luck I listed above. Would it be possible to achieve your standard of "personal responsibility" without them? No. This is why I believe what I do.

It's not about personal or individual responsibility - it's about being responsible for ALL of God's children - - and I say this without any religious affiliation or upbringing.

Are you feeling LUCKY? -§

So Squiggle, are you suggesting that citizens who were not as lucky as you in those key areas you mention (place of birth, nurturing environment and good health) get an automatic waiver from personal responsibility? It's like you're saying that without those attributes they're somehow socially deficient, i.e. inferior, and dependent upon society being responsible for them. That's pretty freaking elitist... I don't think I'm ready to give up on them somehow achieving self-empowerment. And I'm no theologian (or my brother's keeper), but doesn't God help those who help themselves?

Washington DC spends the most per pupil than anywhere else in the US but ranks dead last in almost every category. They are ranked behind even Guam on English scores. How could that be if money solves the problem?

Well, I certainly feel rebuked. Damn you are a political force to be reckoned with, anonymous poster. And your personal insults just make your point so much better. That was pretty disjointed, you don't seem to be able to get past your anonyous anger to state clear points. But I do like my fans giving me attention.

The fact that you can't spell must be a clever ruse to catch us off-guard, right? Plus, your usage of big-people terms like "sentence fragment" made me almost believe you had graduated high school.

Thanks for the laughs.

have you thought about drug rehab and/or at least sleeping at night to help your drug addiction issue.

I work graveyards, I sleep during the day but thanks for the concern.

fuck the sun.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

Burpgun - You're short-sighted in your support of personal responsibility. This is a micro issue you speak of that has very little or no impact on the big picture. It's like arguing over something like gay marriage when there's a war going on that's costing us millions everyday - money which can be put towards humanitarian efforts for example. Sometimes one can be 100% compliant with the "code" of personal responsibility while being fiscally and morally responsible, yet still get a bad shake in life and need support from others who are more fortunate. It's less about feeling cheated that someone is getting a free ride and more about doing what's right. In a way, we've both been given a free ride from the man upstairs. Remember, "God helps those who help themselves" applies only to those who are able. -§

For the record: these posts truly suck.

I'd like to make a motion to keep things light on these boards for entertainment value only. Isn't that why we're all here? -§

Some people you can try to teach to fish and they'll just wait until you catch one and then help you eat it. Other people will listen to a few minutes of your lesson and then yank the pole out of your hands to do it on their own... And I guess there are some who have learned that at the end of everyone of these classes there'll be fish cookin' and they just show up then.

The point is let me determine which ones are which and prescribe the charity from my pocket accordingly.

And I read somewhere that Jim Morrison had the habit of changing the subject of a conversation to "God or death" within five minutes of engaging. Not a huge fan of the Lizard King, but those are the ultimate issues (or issue) for every human being. Perhaps more 'on-topic' than 'off-topic' though...

§ Wrote:
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> I'd like to make a motion to keep things light on
> these boards for entertainment value only. Isn't
> that why we're all here? -§

no. you clearly didnt read the page header.

Quote

Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication between residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.

so clearly it's so people can give fools the smackdown. ok, so it's for whatever people want it to be about. one more thing, squiggles, if you dont like this particular thread, dont read it and then post to it. for the most part i dont look at the sports based posts.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

If we all took his attitude we would have nothing. I think it is time § move to Cuba and he can experience his idealistic world of "Peachy Keen".

If you take off your rose colored glasses and look at the issues in America, you may find the majority of challenges are self-induced.

1. If you select (yes engage in sex; your choice) to have illegitimate children, you (individual) has set that child up for failure.

2. If you send your child to school and don't place emphasis on excellence and demand/work/results from your child you have set that child up for failure.

3. I realize § Fascist you don't understand this concept, but life is hard work
for everyone.

4. No one comes from a perfect home; apparently you did and it seems you were given a silver spoon and everything handed to you!

5. Continue to make excuses and your children will grow up to be like you.

6. You probably work for the government and will not realize this, but the government doesn't have any money. They take your money in the name of good will and gives it to someone else for all your "MARXIST REASONS".

7. You are truly a person of severe hate for this country and anyone that believes in working hard, goal setting, and yes to include accomplishment!

8. Some day you may get what you ask for and everyone will be like you with a hand out and you will get exactly what you ask for, NOTHING!!

9. Wake up FACIST! Yes the definition below notes your central point, victim-hood.

10. Webster defines fascism as "a political philosophy, movement, or regime (as that of the Fascisti) that exalts nation and often race above the individual and that stands for a centralized autocratic government headed by a dictatorial leader, severe economic and social regimentation, and forcible suppression of opposition"[3].

A recent definition is that by former Columbia University Professor Robert O. Paxton:

"Fascism may be defined as a form of political behavior marked by obsessive preoccupation with community decline, humiliation, or victim-hood and by compensatory cults of unity, energy, and purity, in which a mass-based party of committed nationalist militants, working in uneasy but effective collaboration with traditional elites, abandons democratic liberties and pursues with redemptive violence and without ethical or legal restraints goals of internal cleansing and external expansion." [4]


11. The definition sums you up real well, oppressive centralized government, victim-hood, and cleanse all those that work hard or oppose your views in the country.

12. You are a total POS!

Who's the one slingin' mud here? Do you feel better now that you got that off your chest?

Again, short-sighted and a very micro, closed-minded point of view. Your interpretation of fascism can be equally applied to your values and those values of the current administration. I'd break it down for you in a 12-step demonstration, but since I don't get paid to do this, I'm not going to waste my time trying to educate someone as dense as you appear to be.

Here's some dumbed-down advice: You really need to get laid once in awhile. -§

Gravis - I'm simply stating my intent that I only visit this board for entertainment - a comedic diversion, if you will. -§

§ Wrote:
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> Gravis - I'm simply stating my intent that I only
> visit this board for entertainment - a comedic
> diversion, if you will. -§

ok... just dont take a knife to a gun fight.


"the wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish."

what about a gun that shoots knives? Can I bring one of those?

Gun knife:

I assume there was a pic intended there, such as

doh!
missed that one, great minds think alike, your pic didn't come up until after I found it

you went for the wyatt earp, I went for the billy the kid... I see a freudian explanation...

Simply throwing money at a problem often doesn't fix it. It's what the money is spent on that counts.

Poor management gives poor results no matter how money you give them to waste. That goes for government, that goes for private businesses too.

tax and spend:
That's true. If the government spends a ton of money to train teachers who don't want to be teachers, nothing's going to change.

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WHERE'S THE BEEF

hey what the fuck happened to the pics max and I linked to

The man keeping us down.

I loved the IT spending that went on in Price William County Schools in the early 90s. They wired Hylton with token ring and shielded twisted pair (STP), for example. As I recall Ethernet over unshielded twisted pair (UTP) was what everyone else had standardized on and token ring along with STP was already on it's way out. I'm sure by now they're using Ethernet with UTP and spend lots of money putting new UTP in to replace the STP.

Just one example of how clueless idiots can be dangerous with a blank check.

RESton Peace Wrote:
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> hey what the fuck happened to the pics max and I
> linked to

The host that is serving the image (www.discountcutlery.net) has been up and down. Took me a good 10 minutes trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with the forum before i realized it was that simple.

To ensure your pic will stick forever just save it to your computer and upload it as an attachment with your post.

Cong Barney Frank Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> 22 ways to be a liberal Democrat
>
> You know you are liberal if:

>
> I raise this decaf black coffee to you, OP.

23. You are a regressive statist if you think the Supreme Court creating a "right" to murder a developing human being is beyond question but that everyone should ignore its decisions holding that the 2nd Amendment was written to be and is an individual right. I.E., the B of R ratifies but did not confer rights that have always existed.

JezebelIceCreamGlutton Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Cong Barney Frank Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > 22 ways to be a liberal Democrat
> >
> > You know you are liberal if:
>
> >
> > I raise this decaf black coffee to you, OP.
>
> 23. You are a regressive statist if you think the
> Supreme Court creating a "right" to murder a
> developing human being is beyond question but that
> everyone should ignore its decisions holding that
> the 2nd Amendment was written to be and is an
> individual right. I.E., the B of R ratifies but
> did not confer rights that have always existed.


In texas today, several abortions, lots of crunchy parts. Piss you off? I revel in your anger.

crunchy parts Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> JezebelIceCreamGlutton Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Cong Barney Frank Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > 22 ways to be a liberal Democrat
> > >
> > > You know you are liberal if:
> >
> > >
> > > I raise this decaf black coffee to you, OP.
> >
> > 23. You are a regressive statist if you think
> the
> > Supreme Court creating a "right" to murder a
> > developing human being is beyond question but
> that
> > everyone should ignore its decisions holding
> that
> > the 2nd Amendment was written to be and is an
> > individual right. I.E., the B of R ratifies
> but
> > did not confer rights that have always existed.
>
>
> In texas today, several abortions, lots of crunchy
> parts. Piss you off? I revel in your anger.

It's not too late for you to have a retrospective abortion, crunchparts.

Jump off a highway overpass. Let's hope a 20-ton cement truck flattens your skull. ESAD.

#23 You think that GW Bush taking out a Dictator that killed a million people is the cause of all the trouble in the middle east But when Obama does it in Libia and causes this? WTF Libatards?
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They are a scourge