Re: Worst sunburn stories
Posted by:
Worst story
()
Date: July 03, 2015 08:24PM
I have all of you beat. Back in 2005 when the pool just opened in Centreville I swam in my then girlfriends pool in her complex. She got fried. Like sprinkle old bay on her cooked fried. We were both 22. So she was in too much pain for sex but I rolled over and started playing with her anyways. She got turned on, said don't stop, I didn't, and 9 months later I was a father. The son is some mentally retarded doofus I nicknamed Bort, short for abortion. She left me with this little shit after she found out he was a mutant. She left me for her college professor. Now I'm stick with the little specimen who looks like Sloth from the Goonies and shits more on the rug than a cocker spaniel. He'll be 10 next year. At least I taught him how to play fetch which entertains my boys and I when they're over. Also when he shits his pants in a restaurant our food is free. Too bad the circus or science won't take Bort.