HomeFairfax General ForumArrest/Ticket SearchWiki newPictures/VideosChatArticlesLinksAbout
Off-Topic :  Fairfax Underground fairfax underground logo
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Sofakingwetoddid ()
Date: March 08, 2015 04:10PM

If Jesus were alive, I think he would like the G41-Gen4 but the G21-Gen 4 would also be a good back up weapon. I'm guessing he would open carry so as to get more attention. Had he had one 2000 years ago, he could have killed the Romans who crucified him. Had Mary and Joseph been packing, they would not have had to give birth in the manger. God Bless the NRA for combining guns and Christian values.
I'm being buried with my guns so I can be god-damned sure of getting into heaven one way or the other.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: GodBlessTheNRA ()
Date: March 08, 2015 04:14PM

Florida-Shooting-Pistol-Packing-Pastor-T

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Jesus wouldn't carry ()
Date: March 08, 2015 04:47PM

He had a huge heart and cock.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: BEH ()
Date: March 08, 2015 05:03PM

Jesus would be proficent in Krav Maga

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: FrankRizzo ()
Date: March 08, 2015 05:16PM

Jesus Norris doesn't open carry, his pistol open levitates.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: NippleChuck ()
Date: March 08, 2015 05:49PM

The perfect hand gun.
Nip
Attachments:
index - Copy.jpg

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Que? ()
Date: March 08, 2015 06:23PM

Jesus would not carry a handgun, per se. He'd walk around with a little zip gun up his robe sleeve...just like dude in Django.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Dead libtardz ()
Date: March 08, 2015 06:29PM

If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?

One that painfully and effectively kills libtard losers like OP.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: trogdor! ()
Date: March 08, 2015 08:30PM


Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: NP3kD ()
Date: March 08, 2015 10:05PM

Dead libtardz Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun
> would he carry?
>
> One that painfully and effectively kills libtard
> losers like OP.


Jesus was a libtard. It's all NRA Contards that have to worry about it. When you pack a gun for no reason, you are saying you don't believe in god. Enjoy hell. You will be there with Fox news, Hitler, Stalin,your ISIS buddies and all the rest of your Satan worshiping friends.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: The Holy Spirit ()
Date: March 08, 2015 10:26PM

Jesus packs an M-16 but God carries an AK-47. No handguns. No shit!

JesusAK47.jpg

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: LIB-TARDZ LOLZ! ()
Date: March 08, 2015 10:30PM

NP3kD Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Dead libtardz Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun
> > would he carry?
> >
> > One that painfully and effectively kills
> libtard
> > losers like OP.
>
>
> Jesus was a libtard. It's all NRA Contards that
> have to worry about it. When you pack a gun for no
> reason, you are saying you don't believe in god.
> Enjoy hell. You will be there with Fox news,
> Hitler, Stalin,your ISIS buddies and all the rest
> of your Satan worshiping friends.


Man you're lame. Your use of NRA, contards, then you go to Fxo, Hitler, etc.

You tried to fast.

FAIL.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: LIB-TARDZ LOLZ! ()
Date: March 08, 2015 10:31PM

Sorry, "too" fast. Saw my error and admitted to it. Unlike you.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Pius One ()
Date: March 08, 2015 10:41PM

He would disown Christianity if he were alive today. Too many war profiteers, crooks, pedos, druggies, etc. hiding behind Christianity.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: GOD HATES YOU! ()
Date: March 09, 2015 11:09AM

DUH
Attachments:
jhg.jpg

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: KHXCU ()
Date: March 09, 2015 11:12AM

Jesus could explode his enemies' heads using only his thoughts. He only would use a gun if he needed to make it look like someone else did it.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Real World ()
Date: March 09, 2015 11:26AM

Christianity was the original Occupy Wall Street. Of course, most people have no real understanding of either one.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: LJ ()
Date: March 09, 2015 01:15PM

According to Islam, when Jesus returns, he will have a sword and slay the Antichrist with it. That is just fucked up thinking on many levels.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 09, 2015 03:33PM

Just think if he was killed by a bullet instead of being crucified, everyone would have bullets on their walls and priests would make the sign of a bullet when giving last rights.

It's fun to think of all the death symbols Jesus might have provided for christians other than a cross.
Attachments:
polls_CAMPISE_gun_necklace_gold_1653_764725_answer_2_xlarge.png

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: If Jesus were alive today, what kind of handgun would he carry?
Posted by: iLester ()
Date: March 09, 2015 03:59PM

He would be a carpenter. He would brandishing a hammer in one hand and wearing a tool belt. At the age of 32 when he started his ministry, he would be working on a good-size beer belly.

Options: ReplyQuote


Your Name: 
Your Email (Optional): 
Subject: 
Attach a file
  • No file can be larger than 75 MB
  • All files together cannot be larger than 300 MB
  • 30 more file(s) can be attached to this message
Spam prevention:
Please, enter the code that you see below in the input field. This is for blocking bots that try to post this form automatically.
 ********  **    **  **    **  **          *******  
 **         **  **    **  **   **    **   **     ** 
 **          ****      ****    **    **   **     ** 
 ******       **        **     **    **    ******** 
 **           **        **     *********         ** 
 **           **        **           **   **     ** 
 **           **        **           **    *******  
This forum powered by Phorum.