You swear to God that by reading any further than this point . that you forgo all possible forms of sexual pleasure forever.

One you read the above you are now 100% committed to God that you will live a life of celibacy forever.

If you break the oath, bad mojo and terrible luck will rain down upon you and for the rest of your life whenever you reach orgasm you will be reminded at climax that you broke your oath to God.

I put a Voodoo magic spell on this. Your mind can not erase your commitment to God. You are bound for eternity.

Does playing with yourself count?

Try it and see. Right at orgasm tell yourself not to think about the oath.

If you play with yourself underwater at the right depth, you could technically get away with breaking but not-breaking the oath.

Check it out:
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Water temperature, salinity, oxygenation variables can effect sperm viscosity.

If the water is really cold the sperm might not flow as easily or as quickly 8 feet below the water surface.

Also, there is a thermal cline that lowers the temperature of the water as you go deeper.

Water salinity and oxygen levels are depth and temperature sensitive, and could increase/decrease the flow rate of submerged sperm based on their relative coefficient of friction.

The equation is inherently flawed without factoring in temperature, thermal cline, salinity, oxygen, and coefficient of friction variables which are known to vary over time. Don't even get me started on PH levels of sperm and water.

gerrymanderer2 (OP) posts several lies on ffu daily - many\.10think he's a fx co gov worker who is getting paid to do it for false DNC democrat "advertising". he floods ffu with useless posts to bump down major news, posts fecal matter, mutilated bodies, child porn, foreign drug ads and sneaker ads, tells people to kill themselves and government should seize them and put them on psych pills in prison - decided by democrat gov of course, promotes kangaroo courthouse trials, gives anti-religious rants, gives satanic ritual rants, posts black males with large dicks on white young females, portends white low birth rate and fall of USA, food tampering/poisoning, and anything possible to DEMORALIZE white people on ffu. (perhaps a chinese prisoner or isis member - but definitely knowledgeable of fx co gov from the inside at times). the website operator has told him "not to post or return" which are still posted - not removed, by the sysop: not because of a political leaning but for continual illegal and gross spam along with messages that are only to demoralize if not kill others. he/she plays at financial terrorism as well: continuall reporting false financial data, and fake emergency please from (fake members of the community he makes up)

G2 is not satanic - he's a china loving commie who is paid to attack religion republicans and anything sacred using fx co gov money.

Most of us don't need an oath to remain celibate!

After taking this oath, I broke it only hours later when I submitted myself to a routine prostate exam and the smoking hot doctor hit it with her fingertips and I Peter North-ed across the room...