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BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Folterung8109 ()
Date: January 29, 2009 05:18PM

I have noticed that douchebags gravitate to two cars: BMW 3 series (M3 triples douche factor), and Infiniti G coupes. I beg the question: Does a douche buy these cars, or does the car make them the douche?

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Cookie Wafer ()
Date: January 29, 2009 05:21PM

They are indeed cars for the d-bag. The only luxury segment that is excluded from d-bag territory are Benz, Rover, Jag and Audi.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: HIJACKER ()
Date: January 29, 2009 09:22PM

Do you even know what the logo of BMW represents and why its white/blue? My guess is no - so who's the douche.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: taco eater ()
Date: January 29, 2009 09:26PM

Hummers seem to have a propensity to attract douche bag drivers too

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Bob ()
Date: January 30, 2009 02:39AM

taco eater Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hummers seem to have a propensity to attract
> douche bag drivers too


Especially the ones with those yellow lights all over them. You really look like a giant douche rolling down the highway in one of those.

"I get 3 mpg highway, and I want everyone to notice me so I had the dealer glue 30 yellow lights all over my ride for an extra $2,500!"

Besides, you know the douchebags driving these things blew their first big real bonus they've ever seen on the down-payment for it, and can barely make the monthly payments on it.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: erik ()
Date: January 30, 2009 08:01AM

Bob Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Especially the ones with those yellow lights all
> over them. You really look like a giant douche
> rolling down the highway in one of those.
>
> "I get 3 mpg highway, and I want everyone to
> notice me so I had the dealer glue 30 yellow
> lights all over my ride for an extra $2,500!"
>
> Besides, you know the douchebags driving these
> things blew their first big real bonus they've
> ever seen on the down-payment for it, and can
> barely make the monthly payments on it.

Add a "TAPOUT" sticker and you're looking at the King Douche. "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" at 120db will be your only warning.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Bob ()
Date: January 30, 2009 10:09AM

erik Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> Add a "TAPOUT" sticker and you're looking at the
> King Douche. "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor" at
> 120db will be your only warning.


Apparently, TAPOUT just makes them gay douche bags.


Attachments:
P1010011.jpg
sim-dale%20frank.jpg

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 30, 2009 10:21AM

I may be a douchebag, but I do enjoy my 3 series.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: whocares ()
Date: January 30, 2009 01:56PM

Who is anyone here to judge someone by the car they drive? So what if they blew a bonus on it. They're doing something for themselves. At least they can. A lot of people don't even work hard enough to do that.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: January 30, 2009 01:59PM

I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I liked. They are the most self-absorbed assholes on the road, and I have sexual fantasies about taking a baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 30, 2009 02:48PM

Fuck you, asshole.


MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I liked.
> They are the most self-absorbed assholes on the
> road, and I have sexual fantasies about taking a
> baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: January 30, 2009 03:16PM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Fuck you, asshole.

Hey, I'm not the one weaving in and out of traffic during rush hour like it's going to get me somewhere quicker, merging like an old retarded asian lady with dementia, cutting people off, beeping my horn if the light's been green for more than half a second, telling people about my "beemer," showing off by waiting until I'm thirty feet from the car to lock it with the remote so it chirps, and polishing the hood ornament with my own self-righteous sperm.

All justified by, "I have a BMW, that means I am rich and special, and if you hit me because I did something stupid, you'll get fucked on insurance."

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: KOMPRESSOR ()
Date: January 30, 2009 04:04PM

K is for KOMPRESSOR! Mercedes KOMPRESSOR I am driving!

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Fagfux ()
Date: January 30, 2009 06:38PM

KOMPRESSOR Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> K is for KOMPRESSOR! Mercedes KOMPRESSOR I am
> driving!


The only thing you are driving...[is] me crazy!

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 30, 2009 06:40PM

No, let me guess--you're more the type who drives in the left lane no matter what, driving at the speed limit teaching everybody else a lesson about the obeying the law. At unprotected left turns you stop at the line instead of pulling into the intersection so when the light turns yellow we both miss it. I'm thinking you're the guy who has the right of way but still stops when I try to time my turn so I cross right behind you. I bet you wait for that close in parking spot and tie everybody up by blocking the lane with your blinker on, patiently waiting so you don't have to waddle your fat ass any further than necessary. Then you back into the spot. How's many miles do you have on that Ford Fiesta anyway?


MrMephisto Wrote:
> Hey, I'm not the one weaving in and out of traffic
> during rush hour like it's going to get me
> somewhere quicker, merging like an old retarded
> asian lady with dementia, cutting people off,
> beeping my horn if the light's been green for more
> than half a second, telling people about my
> "beemer," showing off by waiting until I'm thirty
> feet from the car to lock it with the remote so it
> chirps, and polishing the hood ornament with my
> own self-righteous sperm.
>
> All justified by, "I have a BMW, that means I am
> rich and special, and if you hit me because I did
> something stupid, you'll get fucked on insurance."

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Sheisty ()
Date: January 30, 2009 06:45PM

Personally, I think people who drive Mustangs are douchebags. Get a real sportscar!

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: January 30, 2009 07:00PM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> No, let me guess--you're more the type who drives
> in the left lane no matter what, driving at the
> speed limit teaching everybody else a lesson about
> the obeying the law. At unprotected left turns
> you stop at the line instead of pulling into the
> intersection so when the light turns yellow we
> both miss it. I'm thinking you're the guy who has
> the right of way but still stops when I try to
> time my turn so I cross right behind you. I bet
> you wait for that close in parking spot and tie
> everybody up by blocking the lane with your
> blinker on, patiently waiting so you don't have to
> waddle your fat ass any further than necessary.
> Then you back into the spot. How's many miles do
> you have on that Ford Fiesta anyway?

You're a complete cock smoker, but you did just accurately describe another group of drivers that I hate.

Not as much as I hate faggoty BMW drivers though, grunting as they work out in the gym before heading over to Starbucks to get a triple shot amaretto honey nut oat frappuccino that they'll send back because it "doesn't taste right," while the cashier imagines them being mauled by a bear and feels better about the situation.

It's like these yuppie fucks get out of college that their mommy and daddy paid for and say, "well, I'm not rich enough to buy a real luxury car, but BMWs are pretty expensive. Chicks will totally dig that. Plus, I'm an asshole, so the 3 series it is! Oh, and it's gotta be a rag top convertible, because I also heart cock."

And see? I've never met you, but I can tell you're just another asshole BMW driver. Why don't you grow up and get a Mercedes?

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 30, 2009 07:19PM

Judge people much?


MrMephisto Wrote:
>
> You're a complete cock smoker, but you did just
> accurately describe another group of drivers that
> I hate.
>
> Not as much as I hate faggoty BMW drivers though,
> grunting as they work out in the gym before
> heading over to Starbucks to get a triple shot
> amaretto honey nut oat frappuccino that they'll
> send back because it "doesn't taste right," while
> the cashier imagines them being mauled by a bear
> and feels better about the situation.
>
> It's like these yuppie fucks get out of college
> that their mommy and daddy paid for and say,
> "well, I'm not rich enough to buy a real luxury
> car, but BMWs are pretty expensive. Chicks will
> totally dig that. Plus, I'm an asshole, so the 3
> series it is! Oh, and it's gotta be a rag top
> convertible, because I also heart cock."
>
> And see? I've never met you, but I can tell
> you're just another asshole BMW driver. Why don't
> you grow up and get a Mercedes?

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: January 30, 2009 07:33PM

All the time. It's like, one of my most favorite things to do. In fact, I judged at least 15 people today without even realizing it. I would think I have a problem if judging wasn't so goddamn awesome.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Jenkins ()
Date: January 30, 2009 09:55PM

Sand? In DoucheBag's vagina?

It's more likely than you think!

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Bob ()
Date: January 31, 2009 12:04AM

whocares Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Who is anyone here to judge someone by the car
> they drive? So what if they blew a bonus on it.
> They're doing something for themselves. At least
> they can. A lot of people don't even work hard
> enough to do that.

Umm, judging is what people who buy BMWs expect. If their world didn't revolve around what other people thought of them, they'd buy an accord.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Bob ()
Date: January 31, 2009 12:08AM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> No, let me guess--you're more the type who drives
> in the left lane no matter what, driving at the
> speed limit teaching everybody else a lesson about
> the obeying the law. At unprotected left turns
> you stop at the line instead of pulling into the
> intersection so when the light turns yellow we
> both miss it. I'm thinking you're the guy who has
> the right of way but still stops when I try to
> time my turn so I cross right behind you. I bet
> you wait for that close in parking spot and tie
> everybody up by blocking the lane with your
> blinker on, patiently waiting so you don't have to
> waddle your fat ass any further than necessary.
> Then you back into the spot. How's many miles do
> you have on that Ford Fiesta anyway?
>
>

You described all the bad driving behavior that I often see a 3 series doing.

Except you got one wrong. It is illegal to enter the intersection until you can safely clear the intersection. It's a "don't block the box" rule, you know, to try to prevent idiots like you in Hummers and 3 series BMWs from blocking the intersection. The people who sit at the white line on a left turn are obeying the law.

All the other behaviors you mention, like driving in the left lane and not yielding to overtaking cars, etc, are also breaking the law.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: January 31, 2009 05:26AM

\



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 02/26/2012 01:24AM by Alias.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 31, 2009 08:33AM

It's not illegal and it's not blocking the box. You pull into the intersection between the medians and wait for an opportunity go through. If the light turns yellow the driver in the intersection is allowed to go through when oncoming traffic has stopped. You are not blocking oncoming traffic.


Bob Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> DoucheBag Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > No, let me guess--you're more the type who
> drives
> > in the left lane no matter what, driving at the
> > speed limit teaching everybody else a lesson
> about
> > the obeying the law. At unprotected left turns
> > you stop at the line instead of pulling into
> the
> > intersection so when the light turns yellow we
> > both miss it. I'm thinking you're the guy who
> has
> > the right of way but still stops when I try to
> > time my turn so I cross right behind you. I
> bet
> > you wait for that close in parking spot and tie
> > everybody up by blocking the lane with your
> > blinker on, patiently waiting so you don't have
> to
> > waddle your fat ass any further than necessary.
>
> > Then you back into the spot. How's many miles
> do
> > you have on that Ford Fiesta anyway?
> >
> >
>
> You described all the bad driving behavior that I
> often see a 3 series doing.
>
> Except you got one wrong. It is illegal to enter
> the intersection until you can safely clear the
> intersection. It's a "don't block the box" rule,
> you know, to try to prevent idiots like you in
> Hummers and 3 series BMWs from blocking the
> intersection. The people who sit at the white
> line on a left turn are obeying the law.
>
> All the other behaviors you mention, like driving
> in the left lane and not yielding to overtaking
> cars, etc, are also breaking the law.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 31, 2009 08:37AM

What you and Mephisto don't understand is that people buy Lexus, Mercedes, etc. for status. You buy a BMW for performance. I'll grant you that the 7 series is a status car but the 3 series is all about performance. You buy an Accord if you are the type who reads Consumer Reports.

Bob Wrote:
>
> Umm, judging is what people who buy BMWs expect.
> If their world didn't revolve around what other
> people thought of them, they'd buy an accord.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: January 31, 2009 08:41AM

Since you'll probably be back here arguing the point, here is the relevant section from a driving school text:

c) Left turns – protected and unprotected



1. Scan for hazards – other vehicles, pedestrians, and bicycles

a. At a green light you may make a left turn only if there is no hazard from oncoming traffic and it is not prohibited. When making a left turn at an uncontrolled intersection or a circular green light with no arrow, you must yield to oncoming traffic. It is a good practice to pull into the intersection in preparation for the turn. Once in the intersection you must complete your turn even if the light has turned yellow or red.



2. Vehicle position – before and after turn

a. When you are making a left turn oncoming vehicles often have the right-of-way.

b. You must yield to oncoming drivers when making a left-hand turn.

c. Safely turning left includes not turning too soon and "cutting the corner" of the lane belonging to vehicles coming toward you.



3. When view is blocked

a. Scan both directions left, right, left before turning. Do this procedure a couple of times to ensure that you are able to see oncoming traffic.



DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It's not illegal and it's not blocking the box.
> You pull into the intersection between the medians
> and wait for an opportunity go through. If the
> light turns yellow the driver in the intersection
> is allowed to go through when oncoming traffic has
> stopped. You are not blocking oncoming traffic.
>
>
> Bob Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > DoucheBag Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > No, let me guess--you're more the type who
> > drives
> > > in the left lane no matter what, driving at
> the
> > > speed limit teaching everybody else a lesson
> > about
> > > the obeying the law. At unprotected left
> turns
> > > you stop at the line instead of pulling into
> > the
> > > intersection so when the light turns yellow
> we
> > > both miss it. I'm thinking you're the guy
> who
> > has
> > > the right of way but still stops when I try
> to
> > > time my turn so I cross right behind you. I
> > bet
> > > you wait for that close in parking spot and
> tie
> > > everybody up by blocking the lane with your
> > > blinker on, patiently waiting so you don't
> have
> > to
> > > waddle your fat ass any further than
> necessary.
> >
> > > Then you back into the spot. How's many miles
> > do
> > > you have on that Ford Fiesta anyway?
> > >
> > >
> >
> > You described all the bad driving behavior that
> I
> > often see a 3 series doing.
> >
> > Except you got one wrong. It is illegal to
> enter
> > the intersection until you can safely clear the
> > intersection. It's a "don't block the box"
> rule,
> > you know, to try to prevent idiots like you in
> > Hummers and 3 series BMWs from blocking the
> > intersection. The people who sit at the white
> > line on a left turn are obeying the law.
> >
> > All the other behaviors you mention, like
> driving
> > in the left lane and not yielding to overtaking
> > cars, etc, are also breaking the law.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Bob ()
Date: February 01, 2009 01:02AM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> a. At a green light you may make a left turn
> only if there is no hazard from oncoming traffic
> and it is not prohibited. When making a left turn
> at an uncontrolled intersection or a circular
> green light with no arrow, you must yield to
> oncoming traffic. It is a good practice to pull
> into the intersection in preparation for the turn.
> Once in the intersection you must complete your
> turn even if the light has turned yellow or red.
>


I don't know what book you found that in, or if it has any relevance to VA laws. I've been given a ticket for running a red in the exact "good practice" scenario mentioned above. The Fairfax County cop's exact words were "Unless you can safely clear the intersection, you must remain behind the white line. You should never try to race a yellow light to make your turn, either. I've been to too many accident scenes where someone tried to beat the yellow only to be t-boned by someone else also running the light in the oncoming lanes."

I thought the same thing you think, and I went to court to fight that ticket. The judge very calmly explained to me, in a manner that made it seem like he's said it a thousand times, "under no circumstances should you enter any intersection until you can safely clear the intersection. I mean, no matter if you are turning or going straight down the road. You don't enter the intersection until you can proceed through, all the way."

I bet you also think that it is okay to turn left into the right lane of a four-lane road, or right into the left lane, don't you? You know, like everyone else does? Well, when I took the behind the wheel test when I was 16, at the Tyson's DMV, I did that and the tester said he could count that as a reason to fail me if he wanted to. Even if you are going to make the next right, when you make a left you turn into the left lane, then change lanes into the right lane to make your turn. That's just the law, even if nobody seems to do it, or even know it.

Hell, in my neighborhood, there are about two dozen people who park their cars on the wrong side of the road, facing in the wrong direction. They are too lazy to turn around and park properly, and they apparently have never looked at a preprinted parking ticket slip that plainly lists that as a $50 offense. Just because a lot of people do it, often a majority, doesn't make it legal or proper. Look at all the left-lane bandits on the roads. It seems most drivers have no concept that it is illegal to remain in the left lane after an overtaking car has given an audible or visible signal.

§ 46.2-842.1. Drivers to give way to certain overtaking vehicles on divided highways.

It shall be unlawful to fail to give way to overtaking traffic when driving a motor vehicle to the left and abreast of another motor vehicle on a divided highway. On audible or light signal, the driver of the overtaken vehicle shall move to the right to allow the overtaking vehicle to pass as soon as the overtaken vehicle can safely do so. A violation of this section shall not be construed as negligence per se in any civil action.





Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 02/01/2009 03:56AM by Bob.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: FYI ()
Date: February 01, 2009 03:44AM

Douchebag,

Don't you know Bob is ALWAYS right? He even witnessed the birth of Jesus!

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: BTW ()
Date: February 01, 2009 03:03PM

Did that say:

Douchebag,

Don't you know Bob is ALWAYS right? He even witnessed the birth of Jesus!


Now, why would someone do that? Hmmm? I wonder?

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: thatwasgreat ()
Date: February 02, 2009 01:26PM

MRMEPHISTO--That was frickin great man. Thanks for the good laugh.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 02, 2009 02:01PM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> What you and Mephisto don't understand is that
> people buy Lexus, Mercedes, etc. for status. You
> buy a BMW for performance.

That's what Lexus, Mercedes, Jaguar, Mustang, and BMW people say to justify their spending habits; "It's a performance thing, you wouldn't understand."

I probably don't understand, because I view a car as a tool. Being able to do 0-60 in 2.4 seconds doesn't matter much in an area filled with stoplights, suburbia, and traffic jams. Your spiffy little BMW can't do anything that my 2002 Camry with 100,000+ miles and a foot-long crack in the windshield can't.

The only difference is that people don't automatically assume I suck dicks when they look at my car, and I'm probably paying far less for my "performance" than you are. If anything, people looking at my car think I'm a poor person, which is fine, because I don't need the validation of others to feel good about myself.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: February 02, 2009 02:21PM

Actually, it's pretty clear you do place a lot of value in what other people think of you. I don't need to justify my spending habits to you or anyone else. I can afford the car I choose to drive. I also don't judge someone like you who hasn't different priorities for your money. It's your money, spend it as you wish. Bitterness and resentment towards others won't improve your lot in life, brother.

MrMephisto Wrote:
> That's what Lexus, Mercedes, Jaguar, Mustang, and
> BMW people say to justify their spending habits;
> "It's a performance thing, you wouldn't
> understand."
>
> I probably don't understand, because I view a car
> as a tool. Being able to do 0-60 in 2.4 seconds
> doesn't matter much in an area filled with
> stoplights, suburbia, and traffic jams. Your
> spiffy little BMW can't do anything that my 2002
> Camry with 100,000+ miles and a foot-long crack in
> the windshield can't.
>
> The only difference is that people don't
> automatically assume I suck dicks when they look
> at my car, and I'm probably paying far less for my
> "performance" than you are. If anything, people
> looking at my car think I'm a poor person, which
> is fine, because I don't need the validation of
> others to feel good about myself.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 02, 2009 02:45PM

I don't care what people spend their money on; I'm just agreeing with the assertion someone else made that the vast majority of BMW drivers are assholes. Given the reaction of BMW owners to this thread, it seems that statement is correct, which makes it fact instead of bitterness and resentment.

Brother.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: SBS ()
Date: February 02, 2009 04:02PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> Your spiffy little BMW can't do anything that my 2002
> Camry with 100,000+ miles and a foot-long crack in
> the windshield can't.
>

Except pass inspection. :-)

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 02, 2009 04:17PM

SBS Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Except pass inspection. :-)

Touché.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: y... ()
Date: February 03, 2009 10:52AM

I will also add land rovers to the list

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Hmm, Just Wondering... ()
Date: February 03, 2009 10:59AM

I don't have a problem with Land Rovers as they are inconspicuously in the luxury segment to begin with. They are built for comfort, not performance.

Porsche should be on the list of those exempted from douche-scrutiny. Now that's a fine car.

By the way, "y..." = "Just Wondering..."

Fail.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Lawman ()
Date: February 04, 2009 05:54PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> DoucheBag Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Fuck you, asshole.
>
> Hey, I'm not the one weaving in and out of traffic
> during rush hour like it's going to get me
> somewhere quicker, merging like an old retarded
> asian lady with dementia, cutting people off,
> beeping my horn if the light's been green for more
> than half a second, telling people about my
> "beemer," showing off by waiting until I'm thirty
> feet from the car to lock it with the remote so it
> chirps, and polishing the hood ornament with my
> own self-righteous sperm.
>
> All justified by, "I have a BMW, that means I am
> rich and special, and if you hit me because I did
> something stupid, you'll get fucked on insurance."


Not to mention, he only proved your point Mephisto. If he wasn't such a typical bmw-owning douchebag, he wouldn't have come back with the nice "fuck you". He would have instead just ignored what you said.

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Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: February 04, 2009 10:55PM

Glad to see irony isn't lost on you...


Lawman Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > DoucheBag Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Fuck you, asshole.
> >
> > Hey, I'm not the one weaving in and out of
> traffic
> > during rush hour like it's going to get me
> > somewhere quicker, merging like an old retarded
> > asian lady with dementia, cutting people off,
> > beeping my horn if the light's been green for
> more
> > than half a second, telling people about my
> > "beemer," showing off by waiting until I'm
> thirty
> > feet from the car to lock it with the remote so
> it
> > chirps, and polishing the hood ornament with my
> > own self-righteous sperm.
> >
> > All justified by, "I have a BMW, that means I
> am
> > rich and special, and if you hit me because I
> did
> > something stupid, you'll get fucked on
> insurance."
>
>
> Not to mention, he only proved your point
> Mephisto. If he wasn't such a typical bmw-owning
> douchebag, he wouldn't have come back with the
> nice "fuck you". He would have instead just
> ignored what you said.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Lawman ()
Date: February 04, 2009 11:09PM

Good one.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 05, 2009 07:52AM

The other night, I'm on 395 doing 60 in the far right lane. Some dickhead starts tailgating me with their bright xenon lights. The lane's about to end, so I move to the left one lane. The car roars by me on the right, jumps in front of me, and levels out at 55.

Surprise surprise, it's a BMW.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: February 05, 2009 08:13AM

I guess that settles it, all BMW owners must be douchebags.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The other night, I'm on 395 doing 60 in the far
> right lane. Some dickhead starts tailgating me
> with their bright xenon lights. The lane's about
> to end, so I move to the left one lane. The car
> roars by me on the right, jumps in front of me,
> and levels out at 55.
>
> Surprise surprise, it's a BMW.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 05, 2009 10:03AM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I guess that settles it, all BMW owners must be
> douchebags.

I thought we settled that on January 30th at 2:48 PM.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: February 05, 2009 10:40AM

Subtle humor is pretty much lost on you, isn't it?

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> DoucheBag Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I guess that settles it, all BMW owners must be
> > douchebags.
>
> I thought we settled that on January 30th at 2:48
> PM.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 05, 2009 10:42AM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Subtle humor is pretty much lost on you, isn't
> it?

No. I was just confused by the lack of subtle humor.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: DoucheBag ()
Date: February 05, 2009 12:23PM

Mephisto, what happened to you that made you such an angry person?

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 05, 2009 12:25PM

DoucheBag Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mephisto, what happened to you that made you such
> an angry person?

I can't afford a BMW, so I have to try really hard to be an asshole without one.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: ferfux ()
Date: February 05, 2009 12:37PM

attributing someones social interaction and his choice of vehicle is pretty silly. I myself find that more douchebag have brass balls or something like it hanging off the tailgate of his pickup truck nowadays. I personally carry a Blue sharpy around and colour them blue whenever I see one in parking lots.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: February 05, 2009 12:59PM

ferfux Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> attributing someones social interaction and his
> choice of vehicle is pretty silly. I myself find
> that more douchebag have brass balls or something
> like it hanging off the tailgate of his pickup
> truck nowadays. I personally carry a Blue sharpy
> around and colour them blue whenever I see one in
> parking lots.

Those are called "rednecks," which are an entirely different genus of douchebag.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 24, 2011 10:20PM

I have seen it all. Kia Forte Coupe trying to race a BMW M3. Of course, BMW driver was insecure enough he had to prove that his car was faster.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: YOU EAT BAG OF DICKS ()
Date: March 24, 2011 10:39PM

Sheisty Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Personally, I think people who drive Mustangs are
> douchebags. Get a real sportscar!

SHUT IT YOU ELITIST COCKMASTER!

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Conie ()
Date: March 24, 2011 10:55PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I liked.
> They are the most self-absorbed assholes on the
> road, and I have sexual fantasies about taking a
> baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs.


haha..have to agree with you

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Conie ()
Date: March 24, 2011 10:58PM

Alias Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mr. M wrote:
>
> "I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I liked.
> They are the most self-absorbed assholes on the
> road, and I have sexual fantasies about taking a
> baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs."
> _____________
>
> Sexual fantasies?
>
> Stay away from my car.


Hmmm...Alias wants us to know that she has a BMW

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: ThePackLeader ()
Date: March 25, 2011 07:19AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have seen it all. Kia Forte Coupe trying to race
> a BMW M3. Of course, BMW driver was insecure
> enough he had to prove that his car was faster.


I love it when the M3's try to race a Mustang that happens to be an SVT Cobra (At least the 2003-2004 models). Those used to be great to watch.

==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: davedavedave ()
Date: March 25, 2011 08:24AM

Conie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I
> liked.
> > They are the most self-absorbed assholes on the
> > road, and I have sexual fantasies about taking
> a
> > baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs.
>
>
> haha..have to agree with you


Yes the BMW and mustang and a few others are total douchemobiles and should be keyed whenever possible. The other day I noticed a Subaru that has a douchie wing on the back of it and a total pretty boy douche behind the wheel.
Who would have guessed that subaru would ever produce a douchewagon?
Attachments:
sti-tm02.jpg

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: FurfaxTownie ()
Date: March 25, 2011 05:51PM

I traded my BMW in for a Jeep and people started liking me for me :)

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: ThePackLeader ()
Date: March 25, 2011 06:13PM

davedavedave Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Conie Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > MrMephisto Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > I have never met a BMW owner/driver that I
> > liked.
> > > They are the most self-absorbed assholes on
> the
> > > road, and I have sexual fantasies about
> taking
> > a
> > > baseball bat to an entire lot full of BMWs.
> >
> >
> > haha..have to agree with you
>
>
> Yes the BMW and mustang and a few others are total
> douchemobiles and should be keyed whenever
> possible. The other day I noticed a Subaru that
> has a douchie wing on the back of it and a total
> pretty boy douche behind the wheel.
> Who would have guessed that subaru would ever
> produce a douchewagon?


Nah, don't key the car.

==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: TheResults ()
Date: March 25, 2011 06:35PM

FurfaxTownie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I traded my BMW in for a Jeep and people started
> liking me for me :)


So now you have fewer friends?




j/k

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Ahmed. ()
Date: March 25, 2011 07:23PM

thats so funny, I was just thinking about this yesterday. I hate any guy that drives a BMW 1 series. I think its the ugliest piece of shit on the road

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Dbag ()
Date: March 28, 2011 04:09PM

I'm seriously in the market for a new car.
My top 3 choices are
BMW 335i coupe
BMW M3 coupe
G37 coupe

Wow.. I guess I'm not going to be liked if I get one.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: More Complete ()
Date: March 30, 2011 12:56PM

I love my BMW. Call me what you want, it's fun as hell to drive and well engineered. Basing an opinion of a person based on the car they drive says more about the person with the opinion than the driver of said car.

I also have a Nissan Pathfinder and a Ford Explorer, guess I'm only a douche when I drive the 3 series?

My next car may be an Audi. They use to be notorious for reliability issues but they've come a long way. The V10 S6 is sick.

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: Teh King ()
Date: March 30, 2011 08:59PM

...semitemos wonk uoY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"The three enemies of the people are hegemony, monogamy, and monotony."-Terence McKenna
Attachments:
user48576_pic523609_1288466118rev.jpg

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: M3 das auto ()
Date: October 01, 2014 01:47AM

ThePackLeader Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I have seen it all. Kia Forte Coupe trying to
> race
> > a BMW M3. Of course, BMW driver was insecure
> > enough he had to prove that his car was faster.
>
>
> I love it when the M3's try to race a Mustang that
> happens to be an SVT Cobra (At least the 2003-2004
> models). Those used to be great to watch.

M3 would kick its ass on a track

Options: ReplyQuote
Re: BMW/Infiniti: Douche trademarks?
Posted by: ddlfucnksdy ()
Date: October 01, 2014 08:42AM

You are morons for even arguing about this subject

Options: ReplyQuote


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