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Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Ludwig ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:32AM

Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks

Televangelist Joel Osteen's church in Houston announced Monday that $600,000 in Sunday donations were stolen from its safe last weekend, MyFoxHouston.com reported.

The heist at Lakewood Church wasn't discovered until 8:30 a.m. Monday morning when a church employee and off-duty Harris County Sheriff's Officer noticed the break in, the report said. Investigators believe the theft occurred sometime between Sunday afternoon and Monday morning.

The donations were from services on March 8 and March 9 and included cash, checks and credit cards. Lakewood has asked anyone who attended services this weekend to pay attention to their accounts and report any suspicious activity.

"The funds were fully insured, and we are working with our insurance company to restore the stolen funds to the church," the Lakewood statement said, according to The Houston Chronicle.

Lakewood stresses this was not a data breach, but says the theft was limited to donations made in the actual services.

More than 40,000 people attend weekly services led by Osteen, whose televised sermons reach nearly 100 countries.

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2014/03/11/burglars-steal-nearly-600g-from-joel-osteens-church/




Inside job????

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:39AM

How exactly do you insure donations? It seems you could just make up any amount of money to claim to the insurance company.....

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Rockhound ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:40AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> How exactly do you insure donations? It seems you
> could just make up any amount of money to claim to
> the insurance company.....


No shit, Sherlock.

There is already a thread on this.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Ludwig ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:45AM

Rockhound Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > How exactly do you insure donations? It seems
> you
> > could just make up any amount of money to claim
> to
> > the insurance company.....
>
>
> No shit, Sherlock.
>
> There is already a thread on this.

Strange.....I did do a search first but got no hits.

No really......I did.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Rockhound ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:49AM

Fourth hit if you search for "church".

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Ludwig ()
Date: March 13, 2014 01:58AM

Rockhound Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Fourth hit if you search for "church".


OK. Maybe next time.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: TheMeeper ()
Date: March 13, 2014 06:13AM

>
> $600,000 in Sunday donations

That is an obscene amount of money to be raking in on a Sunday.

At least now it has a better chance of actually helping people then it did in the hands of this shyster.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Shyster ()
Date: March 13, 2014 06:38AM

TheMeeper Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> >
> > $600,000 in Sunday donations
>
> That is an obscene amount of money to be raking in
> on a Sunday.
>
> At least now it has a better chance of actually
> helping people then it did in the hands of this
> shyster.

If you think $600K is an obscene amount, you should see how much Obama steals from U.S. taxpayers every day.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 13, 2014 07:07AM

Shyster Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> If you think $600K is an obscene amount, you
> should see how much Obama steals from U.S.
> taxpayers every day.




...and he doesn't take taxes to line his own pocket, does he? These televangelists always seem to live in palaces with multiple Rolls Royces in the garage, all while saying donations will go to a good cause.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Agree ()
Date: March 13, 2014 07:48AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Shyster Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > If you think $600K is an obscene amount, you
> > should see how much Obama steals from U.S.
> > taxpayers every day.

>
>
>
> ...and he doesn't take taxes to line his own
> pocket, does he? These televangelists always seem
> to live in palaces with multiple Rolls Royces in
> the garage, all while saying donations will go to
> a good cause.


+50. We need to start taxing churches. Fucking insane. More like HE steals 600k/wk (and that's JUST on sunday)

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: aq221 ()
Date: March 13, 2014 08:01AM

i want a job like that

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: TheMeeper ()
Date: March 13, 2014 08:18AM

aq221 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> i want a job like that


I'll give him credit, he's a talented motivational speaker. But if he was bringing in 600,000 a week preaching about allah and mohammed, these same right-wingers who accuse Obama of stealing tax money would be throwing a collective fit and asking that same evil govt to investigate the guy for not being a real American.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 13, 2014 08:34AM

Sounds like an inside job to me.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: WingNut ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:36AM

Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sounds like an inside job to me.


Churches toss around a lot of tax free cash from the collection plates and other donations. Not uncommon at all for some admin in the organization to start filching.

I bet a Google search of "church" "embezzlement" "employee" would bring you more results than you'd ever want to read.


idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam



Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.

Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM


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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Stabitha ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:49AM

The first place i would check is Osteen's pockets. That guy just looks like a shyster.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: WingNut ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:52AM

Stabitha Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The first place i would check is Osteen's pockets.
> That guy just looks like a shyster.

The guy is a hosebag, but his racket is perfectly legal. No need to steal or hide from the tax man.

It will be one of the "little people" around him who didn't feel they were getting their shared of that hard scammed cash.


idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam



Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.

Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM


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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 13, 2014 12:57PM

For most churches in this area, $600,000 is nothing, especially Catholic churches. Many bring in much more than that every Sunday, but on holidays it's way more.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: aging debbie does dallas fan ()
Date: March 13, 2014 03:47PM

i'm guessing anyone who insures a preacher for $600G

is probaby in bed with the preacher planning the money to go missing

-------------------------------
man i was selling insurance plans to pearchers for million dollar home thefts

... thing is it was hard to find preachers who had their own bank in their bedroom !!

imagine that.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: The Rev ()
Date: March 13, 2014 04:48PM

Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> For most churches in this area, $600,000 is
> nothing, especially Catholic churches. Many bring
> in much more than that every Sunday, but on
> holidays it's way more.


Not even close. The very largest Catholic Parish in a NOVA gets about 7-8000 people on a Sunday. Osteen gets 16,000+ for one service.

Osteen should rename his church to "Church of the Almighty Profit."

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Boss Hogg ()
Date: March 13, 2014 05:05PM

Rockhound Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > How exactly do you insure donations? It seems
> you
> > could just make up any amount of money to claim
> to
> > the insurance company.....
>
>
> No shit, Sherlock.
>
> There is already a thread on this.


Done all the time.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 13, 2014 05:06PM

The Rev Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Not even close. The very largest Catholic Parish
> in a NOVA gets about 7-8000 people on a Sunday.

Catholic tithing is 10%.
If you only bring in $1000 per week, that's still $100. Since most people in this area make much more than that, especially with 2 incomes, that's only $800,000.

Even at 4000 participants per weekend at $200 is $800,000.

Many churches tithing is higher than 10%, not to mention all the special donations from rich dummies and even dead dummies.

I know a particular Catholic church in this area brings in 1 million per weekend.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Ludwig ()
Date: March 13, 2014 05:30PM

Are tithings given churches tax deductable??

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Father Finance ()
Date: March 13, 2014 07:28PM

Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The Rev Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > Not even close. The very largest Catholic
> Parish
> > in a NOVA gets about 7-8000 people on a Sunday.
>
> Catholic tithing is 10%.
> If you only bring in $1000 per week, that's still
> $100. Since most people in this area make much
> more than that, especially with 2 incomes, that's
> only $800,000.
>
> Even at 4000 participants per weekend at $200 is
> $800,000.
>
> Many churches tithing is higher than 10%, not to
> mention all the special donations from rich
> dummies and even dead dummies.
>
> I know a particular Catholic church in this area
> brings in 1 million per weekend.


No way do churches around here bring in that kind of bank. Nobody except Mormons actually tithe and if they do it's not in the collection basket. People are not dropping $200 on average in the basket. I bet most collections come I under $1000 per service and that may be high.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Magic Money man ()
Date: March 13, 2014 07:34PM


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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Slimey1 ()
Date: March 13, 2014 07:48PM

What is it with this guy? I have some friends who swear he is Jesus Christ himself and book tickets 6 months in advance to go to one of his "medicine shows" and then give him even more money when they get there.

Havent people learned about these snake charmers?

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Osteenerizer ()
Date: March 13, 2014 09:47PM

You can see Joel Osteen in New York at Yankee Stadium for just $100 a seat. What a scam. You pay for the seat and then he hits you up for donations. Can you imagine Jesus shaking down the flock and then buying a $10M for himself?

http://houston.culturemap.com/news/real-estate/07-04-10-after-move-to-river-oaks-joel-osteen-wants-to-sell-tanglewood-land-for-11-million/



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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: robbing in His name ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:21PM

Ludwig Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash,

It is immoral to earn that level of compensation while preaching the message of Christ to believers who earn 1/100th of that.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Stabitha ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:22PM

According to reports, Osteen hasn't drawn a salary from the church since 2005. His income comes from best-selling books and related products, such as calendars, daybooks and inspirational pamphlets.

Yeah sure buddy. Youre just another crook in along line of religious crooks who swindle people with a notion of false salvation. This fucker belongs behind bars and if there is a God in heaven, he will be checking into The Graybar Hilton soon.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: >Stabitha Wrote: ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:29PM

Stabitha Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> According to reports, Osteen hasn't drawn a salary
> from the church since 2005. His income comes from
> best-selling books and related products, such as
> calendars, daybooks and inspirational pamphlets.
>
> Yeah sure buddy. Youre just another crook in along
> line of religious crooks who swindle people with a
> notion of false salvation. This fucker belongs
> behind bars and if there is a God in heaven, he
> will be checking into The Graybar Hilton soon.


Jealous? He saw the big picture whereas you.....

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Stabitha ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:33PM

>Stabitha Wrote: Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> >
> Jealous? He saw the big picture whereas you.....

How much have you sent his way?

It doesnt take much skill to be a crook.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Satan Osteen ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:44PM

Stabitha Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> According to reports, Osteen hasn't drawn a salary
> from the church since 2005.

how many tailored suits, Learjet trips and luxury hotel stays has he enjoyed on that church account? Hundreds? Thousands?

drawing a salary don't mean dick when you work for an outfit that you can expense for your entire lifestyle.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Stabitha ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:50PM

Satan Osteen Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Stabitha Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > According to reports, Osteen hasn't drawn a
> salary
> > from the church since 2005.
>
> how many tailored suits, Learjet trips and luxury
> hotel stays has he enjoyed on that church account?
> Hundreds? Thousands?
>
> drawing a salary don't mean dick when you work for
> an outfit that you can expense for your entire
> lifestyle.

Like I said, it doesnt take a genius to be a crook. You just target weak minded, gullible people and off to the races you go.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Rockhound ()
Date: March 13, 2014 10:57PM

Religion is the biggest racket of all time.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 13, 2014 11:46PM

Father Finance Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> No way do churches around here bring in that kind
> of bank. Nobody except Mormons actually tithe and
> if they do it's not in the collection basket.
> People are not dropping $200 on average in the
> basket. I bet most collections come I under $1000
> per service and that may be high.


WRONG!
You are way out of date.
For starters, "The Basket", though still used to some extent, is old news. Most tithes are done through mail or online these days and it is not just people who show up on Sunday. Churches have this thing called "the internet" and stream services all over the world.
I know for a fact how much churches bring in and the number is staggering, especially given how little work they do to get it.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 03/13/2014 11:46PM by Numbers.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: L. Ron Bubba ()
Date: March 14, 2014 12:02AM

Rockhound Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Religion is the biggest racket of all time.

Jelly much?
Start your own like I did!

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 14, 2014 12:56AM

Stabitha Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> According to reports, Osteen hasn't drawn a salary
> from the church since 2005.



Yeah, but he gets everything free. I sure he has a massive parsonage, plus a fleet of vehicles paid for by the church.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: March 14, 2014 08:35AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Yeah, but he gets everything free. I sure he has a
> massive parsonage, plus a fleet of vehicles paid
> for by the church.


That's correct. He doesn't pay for a single thing. In addition, he now has groupies (men and Women) that constantly throw themselves at him. The temptation is way too strong and at some point, it will get him into trouble. It always does.
The ministry will try to contain it and they probably already have to some degree, but sooner or later, it will all come crashing down and the cycle will start over again.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Rev. Robert Tilton ()
Date: March 15, 2014 10:37AM

Clearly this is what Jesus wanted. He dreamed of a world where men could be rich from his word and Osteen epitomizes that. Bravo sir.

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Re: Joel Osteen’s church robbed of $600G in cash, checks
Posted by: Rev. Truth ()
Date: March 15, 2014 12:47PM

Because Jesus loved the rich so much, right?

Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 19:23

But when the young man heard this, he went away sad, for he had many possessions. Matthew 19:22

"But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received your comfort." Luke
6:24

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