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Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 26, 2015 07:05AM
I forgot to post this earlier, as it's the best visual of your bowels.
Science in action.
Attachments:
Science in action.
Attachments:
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 26, 2015 10:01AM
Watching the news about this blizzard, I sit in awe of NYC Mayor Bill de Blasio's bowels.
That's a man who always delivers a perfect #4 #2.
That's a man who always delivers a perfect #4 #2.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Gordorsky
()
Date: January 26, 2015 11:32AM
The Slovak food stopped working. I'm sad about this. I do not know what else to try.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 26, 2015 12:42PM
Gordo I was hoping for you. This is a rather disappointing brown streak of developments, but you are not alone in being betrayed by your bowels.
Take a warm bath, clean up and hope for the best.
Now to find a midwife.
Take a warm bath, clean up and hope for the best.
Now to find a midwife.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 26, 2015 02:48PM
I think retailers, and other venues that have large crowds, should have a designated IBS bathroom.
Several letters have been written to local officials, yes I washed my hands. It would be good to see legislation, perhaps ADA relevant brought up for a vote.
The constant straining, screaming like a wounded animal teeth gnashing hollering could be relatively contained.
Several letters have been written to local officials, yes I washed my hands. It would be good to see legislation, perhaps ADA relevant brought up for a vote.
The constant straining, screaming like a wounded animal teeth gnashing hollering could be relatively contained.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 26, 2015 06:05PM
I'm wondering if there are homeopathic cures for acute chronic constipation, this is the one thing I've never tried.
When fiber, metamucil,digital manipulation, and every wives tales bullshit cure has failed , there is nothing I would not try to avoid passing a cinderblock every 4 days.
One thing for sure, no more of the primitive methods of the B team of physicans cursed to practice ano-recto as a specialty.
If I never see another Rectoscope in my life , it'll be too soon.
When fiber, metamucil,digital manipulation, and every wives tales bullshit cure has failed , there is nothing I would not try to avoid passing a cinderblock every 4 days.
One thing for sure, no more of the primitive methods of the B team of physicans cursed to practice ano-recto as a specialty.
If I never see another Rectoscope in my life , it'll be too soon.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
black underwear
()
Date: January 26, 2015 06:35PM
Fuck you BEH and you scat loving motherfuckers
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion3
()
Date: January 27, 2015 08:53AM
I'm starting to wonder if underwear is anon doc, considering the aggressive psychotic behavior.
My starfish took a hit, but I'm still standing.
My starfish took a hit, but I'm still standing.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 27, 2015 09:29AM
Black Underwear is a self loathing IBS sufferer.
Poor kid.
Poor kid.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
black underwear
()
Date: January 27, 2015 10:00AM
BEH Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Black Underwear is a self loathing IBS sufferer.
>
> Poor kid.
Fuck you
Attachments:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Black Underwear is a self loathing IBS sufferer.
>
> Poor kid.
Fuck you
Attachments:
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Wally Joyner
()
Date: January 27, 2015 10:08AM
Question, why isnt this thread called "Foods your digestive system or colon" doesn't want?
Not to be harsh, but the word bowels isn't regularly used.
Not to be harsh, but the word bowels isn't regularly used.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 27, 2015 10:37AM
Blackie U, thats a wonderful bowel movement, an A plus!
I'd sell my soul to excrete one of those every morning.
Thanks for posting, even with the misguided hostility.
I'd sell my soul to excrete one of those every morning.
Thanks for posting, even with the misguided hostility.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 27, 2015 11:10AM
I agree with BEH completely.
Sentimental thoughts of a divine crap, one that I'd sell a kidney for from a bathtub in Mexico.
To those lucky enough not to be bowel trodden, be grateful.
@Wally
Bowels are the scientific name. Later today I hope to post more pictures of perfect bowels, along with more famous people who in my opinion may or may not have bowel issues.
Sentimental thoughts of a divine crap, one that I'd sell a kidney for from a bathtub in Mexico.
To those lucky enough not to be bowel trodden, be grateful.
@Wally
Bowels are the scientific name. Later today I hope to post more pictures of perfect bowels, along with more famous people who in my opinion may or may not have bowel issues.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Bozo Obviously
()
Date: January 27, 2015 12:24PM
I think Blooming Onion is BO for Barack Obama and a supporter of Michelle my bell s food Nazional plan.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 27, 2015 01:17PM
It appears another day off from schools, delivers stupidity in new levels.
I wish young people could be given IBS for just one day. There would be no more mocking of the brown brigade, as their young bowels would be punished severely.
I'm tired of today, as the groan throne might need handles to clamp down on along with a new fan belt holder.
My bowels just got blown away, it's ice and witch hazel time.
I wish young people could be given IBS for just one day. There would be no more mocking of the brown brigade, as their young bowels would be punished severely.
I'm tired of today, as the groan throne might need handles to clamp down on along with a new fan belt holder.
My bowels just got blown away, it's ice and witch hazel time.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Gordorsky
()
Date: January 27, 2015 03:49PM
It looks like I have to go back to office work. Yet what occupations require little to no direct contact with other peoples?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Anon Doc
()
Date: January 27, 2015 04:45PM
Gordon,
How many times can I tell you, to make an appointment with a GI specialist and psychiatrist?
These imbeciles are of no help, and if you make an appointment, you'll feel better afterwards.
How many times can I tell you, to make an appointment with a GI specialist and psychiatrist?
These imbeciles are of no help, and if you make an appointment, you'll feel better afterwards.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 28, 2015 07:18AM
I don't know what that is, but it's either my bowels or anon doc.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 28, 2015 07:38AM
Would the poster "She" please not befoul this vital thread with anti Eesh sentiment?
First of all this thread is the last bastion for a much maligned segment of the population that suffer from several varities of bowel disorders. We are defiled and ridiculed by almost everyone, including our own health providers.
We really need this forum to support one another.
Also, Eesh has shown support for our cause in the past, and we appreciate that.
Now excuse me, while I attend to another bi-weekly, agonizing attempt to pass a concrete slab through a needle hole.
First of all this thread is the last bastion for a much maligned segment of the population that suffer from several varities of bowel disorders. We are defiled and ridiculed by almost everyone, including our own health providers.
We really need this forum to support one another.
Also, Eesh has shown support for our cause in the past, and we appreciate that.
Now excuse me, while I attend to another bi-weekly, agonizing attempt to pass a concrete slab through a needle hole.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 28, 2015 12:46PM
My bowels are screaming after that bloody disaster on the groan throne.
I wish IBS flare ups could have a warning sign.
I wish IBS flare ups could have a warning sign.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
sliced onion
()
Date: January 28, 2015 07:47PM
Blooming Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My bowels are screaming after that bloody disaster
> on the groan throne.
>
> I wish IBS flare ups could have a warning sign.
I wish you the best of luck with your IBS. I now have an appreciation for your condition. Ive been having regular number 4's but only once a day. It hits me at about 2 or 3am. The really bad thing about it is that I don't get out of bed till 5am. I fear I may have to depend on Depends. Do you think there is a chance that I might have the IBS?
-------------------------------------------------------
> My bowels are screaming after that bloody disaster
> on the groan throne.
>
> I wish IBS flare ups could have a warning sign.
I wish you the best of luck with your IBS. I now have an appreciation for your condition. Ive been having regular number 4's but only once a day. It hits me at about 2 or 3am. The really bad thing about it is that I don't get out of bed till 5am. I fear I may have to depend on Depends. Do you think there is a chance that I might have the IBS?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 28, 2015 08:13PM
Sliced first positive news. I admire your bowels. They are quite good, discharging a #4 #2 every 24 hours. That's fantastic.
Yet your bowels window of opportunity is inconvenient. That time in the night or early morning isn't optimal
I don't think you'll need Depends, but maybe adjust your meals a few hours.
Yet your bowels window of opportunity is inconvenient. That time in the night or early morning isn't optimal
I don't think you'll need Depends, but maybe adjust your meals a few hours.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 28, 2015 08:33PM
Matthew 19:24 "it is easier for a camel to go through an eye of a needle..."
Allow that biblical reference to describe tonights elimination...and to explain the broken off fingernails embedded in the bathroom wall.
Allow that biblical reference to describe tonights elimination...and to explain the broken off fingernails embedded in the bathroom wall.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 07:28AM
BEH, great reference and I hope you are okay, and your bowels have survived this challenge. Please post to say "ok".
Last night my sister Matilda and her rugrats were over. The nephews and nieces from hell. All they do is complain about the bad aromas from Uncle B's house, and bang on my bathroom door when I'm trying to unleash a stalagmite.
At the table they eat what they want, and they mock the bristol stool guide posters and fiber supplements.
I so wish I could have a "leave Uncle B alone" sign when I'm taking a crap.
Last night my sister Matilda and her rugrats were over. The nephews and nieces from hell. All they do is complain about the bad aromas from Uncle B's house, and bang on my bathroom door when I'm trying to unleash a stalagmite.
At the table they eat what they want, and they mock the bristol stool guide posters and fiber supplements.
I so wish I could have a "leave Uncle B alone" sign when I'm taking a crap.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
plumbers butt
()
Date: January 29, 2015 07:49AM
Fun facts about toilets!
The word ‘toilet’ comes from the French word toilette, which refers to the act of grooming or cleaning one’s self.
The average life expectancy of a toilet is 50 years.
The first attempt to make toilet air freshener consisted of pomegranates stuffed with cloves.
The first public toilets appeared at London’s Crystal Palace in 1851. They were also the first-known “pay toilets,” as patrons were charged a penny for their use.
It is advised that that a person exits a public restroom stall immediately after flushing since ‘faecal matter’ can fly into the air when flushed!
Only one in 20 people wash their hands properly after going to the toilet.
Women spend up to 60 per cent more time in the bathroom than men.
Hitchcock’s Psycho (1960) was the first movie to feature a flushing toilet.
The White House in Washington, D.C has 35 bathrooms, which means the First Family have 35 toilets to choose from!
Thomas Crapper is the name of the person who first marketed the toilet to the masses.
The word ‘toilet’ comes from the French word toilette, which refers to the act of grooming or cleaning one’s self.
The average life expectancy of a toilet is 50 years.
The first attempt to make toilet air freshener consisted of pomegranates stuffed with cloves.
The first public toilets appeared at London’s Crystal Palace in 1851. They were also the first-known “pay toilets,” as patrons were charged a penny for their use.
It is advised that that a person exits a public restroom stall immediately after flushing since ‘faecal matter’ can fly into the air when flushed!
Only one in 20 people wash their hands properly after going to the toilet.
Women spend up to 60 per cent more time in the bathroom than men.
Hitchcock’s Psycho (1960) was the first movie to feature a flushing toilet.
The White House in Washington, D.C has 35 bathrooms, which means the First Family have 35 toilets to choose from!
Thomas Crapper is the name of the person who first marketed the toilet to the masses.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 11:21AM
Fascinating about groan thrones plumber.
The White House has 35. That's incredible for a shitting President.
War, famine, and political strife have been observed at 1600 Pennsylvania. Yet taking a crap undisturbed=perfect.
The White House has 35. That's incredible for a shitting President.
War, famine, and political strife have been observed at 1600 Pennsylvania. Yet taking a crap undisturbed=perfect.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 12:33PM
I hope BEH is okay.
For once I didn't unload a 50 pound cement bag. Instead rabbit like pellets. A lot of work, but better than the usual biting on fanbelts like dump.
I wonder how other cultures deal with IBS.
For once I didn't unload a 50 pound cement bag. Instead rabbit like pellets. A lot of work, but better than the usual biting on fanbelts like dump.
I wonder how other cultures deal with IBS.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Eesh is BO
()
Date: January 29, 2015 02:40PM
Eesh is BO. BEH and his scat loving buddies proved this the other day with Eesh supports this.
Nasty individual Eesh is.
Nasty individual Eesh is.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 03:34PM
To the person with the toilet info earlier, I've been thinking a lot about 35 groan thrones.
That would make my domicile more pleasant. There could be my throne, others set aside for those with IBS. Bars to hold onto, metallic walls encased in sound proofing, and a couple left for non IBS visitors.
The brown doors would show the IBS friendly ones, heck maybe have fans and Liberace music to soothe the achy bowels.
I am looking forward to a update on how my sister and rugrats bowels are doing at the dining room table.
That would make my domicile more pleasant. There could be my throne, others set aside for those with IBS. Bars to hold onto, metallic walls encased in sound proofing, and a couple left for non IBS visitors.
The brown doors would show the IBS friendly ones, heck maybe have fans and Liberace music to soothe the achy bowels.
I am looking forward to a update on how my sister and rugrats bowels are doing at the dining room table.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 03:34PM
To the person with the toilet info earlier, I've been thinking a lot about 35 groan thrones.
That would make my domicile more pleasant. There could be my throne, others set aside for those with IBS. Bars to hold onto, metallic walls encased in sound proofing, and a couple left for non IBS visitors.
The brown doors would show the IBS friendly ones, heck maybe have fans and Liberace music to soothe the achy bowels.
I am looking forward to a update on how my sister and rugrats bowels are doing at the dining room table.
That would make my domicile more pleasant. There could be my throne, others set aside for those with IBS. Bars to hold onto, metallic walls encased in sound proofing, and a couple left for non IBS visitors.
The brown doors would show the IBS friendly ones, heck maybe have fans and Liberace music to soothe the achy bowels.
I am looking forward to a update on how my sister and rugrats bowels are doing at the dining room table.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 29, 2015 05:45PM
I wanted to check with another brother in bowel, has anyone tried the new red Metamucil with a slightly different name?
The regular orange might help slightly making cement bag sized shits of the fifty versus fifty five pound variety.
The regular orange might help slightly making cement bag sized shits of the fifty versus fifty five pound variety.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Napper9999
()
Date: January 29, 2015 07:09PM
This guys got a sore ass.
Attachments:
Attachments:
Obama's Approval Rating with Military? 15%
Posted by:
WingNut
()
Date: January 29, 2015 09:44PM
Hey guys- do you scrub the bowl after each one of these dastardly dumpings?
Hate to sound like the teachers pet but while the water from the final flush is down, I give a sprinkle of scouring powder and a dash of bleach solution to the porcelain god, then a quick scrub with the brush. It's better than letting things get out of control.
Back in the bachelor days, I depended on a high pressure blast from my piss stick to knock any fecal residue off the bowl, but now I feel a civic duty to decontaminate immediately after evacuation.
If you share a bathroom at least part of the time, I think it is the noble thing to do!
Hate to sound like the teachers pet but while the water from the final flush is down, I give a sprinkle of scouring powder and a dash of bleach solution to the porcelain god, then a quick scrub with the brush. It's better than letting things get out of control.
Back in the bachelor days, I depended on a high pressure blast from my piss stick to knock any fecal residue off the bowl, but now I feel a civic duty to decontaminate immediately after evacuation.
If you share a bathroom at least part of the time, I think it is the noble thing to do!
idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam
Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.
Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/13/2015 12:54PM by WingNut.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
sliced onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 04:58AM
Blooming Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I wanted to check with another brother in bowel,
> has anyone tried the new red Metamucil with a
> slightly different name?
>
> The regular orange might help slightly making
> cement bag sized shits of the fifty versus fifty
> five pound variety.
I will pick up some of the red and try it next week as I am taking a few days off. I really have a phobia about pooping at work or in any public restroom. BO, I am a little worried, in a few hours I have to attend a breakfast meeting with a couple of district managers from out of town. They are staying at a hotel in Manassas and they want to meet at Cracker Barrel! That place is not a bowel friendly place. I fear that after eating CB food I am going to take a quick slide down the scale with a strong sense of urgency. To make things worse I have to drive to Ashland Va right after breakfast to meet a client. I much fear an explosive experience at a I-95 rest area. Please say a prayer for me.
-------------------------------------------------------
> I wanted to check with another brother in bowel,
> has anyone tried the new red Metamucil with a
> slightly different name?
>
> The regular orange might help slightly making
> cement bag sized shits of the fifty versus fifty
> five pound variety.
I will pick up some of the red and try it next week as I am taking a few days off. I really have a phobia about pooping at work or in any public restroom. BO, I am a little worried, in a few hours I have to attend a breakfast meeting with a couple of district managers from out of town. They are staying at a hotel in Manassas and they want to meet at Cracker Barrel! That place is not a bowel friendly place. I fear that after eating CB food I am going to take a quick slide down the scale with a strong sense of urgency. To make things worse I have to drive to Ashland Va right after breakfast to meet a client. I much fear an explosive experience at a I-95 rest area. Please say a prayer for me.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
black underwear
()
Date: January 30, 2015 07:20AM
Fuck you! Scat lovers
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 07:47AM
Wingnut that's very kind what you do. It's polite, a crowd pleaser, and a way of preserving your toilet for posterity.
Toilets are something all of us use, and I'm sure family guests at your house appreciate the clean commode. I hope you remind them of the diligence you show each time.
I wish my groan throne could look better. I'd try this, but do you remember Jack Clark destroying the clubhouse toilet with his baseball bat yeaes ago?
There'd really be nothing to clean after my cement bags.
Toilets are something all of us use, and I'm sure family guests at your house appreciate the clean commode. I hope you remind them of the diligence you show each time.
I wish my groan throne could look better. I'd try this, but do you remember Jack Clark destroying the clubhouse toilet with his baseball bat yeaes ago?
There'd really be nothing to clean after my cement bags.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 07:52AM
Sliced,
I'm thankful you'll try that out. It's hopefully good, but us in the bowel brigade have been deceived by marketing before.
You are in a sticky situation, but guess what? I'd wager one of the district managers has bowel woes. You aren't alone. I'm not suggesting bringing up bowels directly at lunch, but there might be other ways to share discomfort.
Cracker Barrel I'm sorry Sliced. That sawdust gravy is responsible for cruel and unusual bowel pains.
I'm thankful you'll try that out. It's hopefully good, but us in the bowel brigade have been deceived by marketing before.
You are in a sticky situation, but guess what? I'd wager one of the district managers has bowel woes. You aren't alone. I'm not suggesting bringing up bowels directly at lunch, but there might be other ways to share discomfort.
Cracker Barrel I'm sorry Sliced. That sawdust gravy is responsible for cruel and unusual bowel pains.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
ry77
()
Date: January 30, 2015 09:29AM
Bowels lmao
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Gordorsky
()
Date: January 30, 2015 09:54AM
With the Slovakian food not working, I dread applying for jobs on Monday.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Deadly combo
()
Date: January 30, 2015 09:57AM
BO,
What is your exercise regimen, if any? I've found some form of exercise on a regular basis aids in digestion and subsequent elimination. Of course, not being an IBS sufferer helps on my end (pun intended) as well.
What is your exercise regimen, if any? I've found some form of exercise on a regular basis aids in digestion and subsequent elimination. Of course, not being an IBS sufferer helps on my end (pun intended) as well.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Eesh is BO
()
Date: January 30, 2015 11:01AM
Who has a lot of free time?
Eesh!
Eesh!
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 11:39AM
I'm sorry Gordo. Your rear end has caused you angst, pain, misery really.
Yet remember this, your bowels don't define you, you define yourself.
And to the naysayers, eat our shit.
Yet remember this, your bowels don't define you, you define yourself.
And to the naysayers, eat our shit.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 11:40AM
Deadly, I'll get back soon
. Got some rumbles.
. Got some rumbles.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 30, 2015 03:23PM
Deadly aside from Groan Throne squats, not much exercise other than dealing with rugrats.
Exercise does help non IBS folks bowels move better.
Exercise does help non IBS folks bowels move better.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
sliced onion
()
Date: January 31, 2015 06:10AM
Blooming Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sliced,
>
> I'm thankful you'll try that out. It's hopefully
> good, but us in the bowel brigade have been
> deceived by marketing before.
>
> You are in a sticky situation, but guess what?
> I'd wager one of the district managers has bowel
> woes. You aren't alone. I'm not suggesting
> bringing up bowels directly at lunch, but there
> might be other ways to share discomfort.
>
> Cracker Barrel I'm sorry Sliced. That sawdust
> gravy is responsible for cruel and unusual bowel
> pains.
Hey there BO!
I dodged a bullet yesterday. When I met my co-workers for breakfast I mentioned that golden coral is open for breakfast on Fridays and that is where we went. I had fruit and a multi-grain bagel. I looked at the piles of bacon and sausage that were rather tempting but I said to myself WWBOD? I stuck with bowel friendly food.
I have discovered a little trick for better bowel movements. As part of my job I have to visit some of our area jails from time to time. I have noticed that quite often the prisoners put a towel or a blanket over their head while they are pooping. I have tried this at home and found that for some reason it helps me relax more and makes for a more complete evacuation.
Happy trails BO! I am going on a little business trip to western TN so you may not hear from me for a while. Stay strong and let me know if the towel over the head thing works for you.
Your brother in brown,
Sliced
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sliced,
>
> I'm thankful you'll try that out. It's hopefully
> good, but us in the bowel brigade have been
> deceived by marketing before.
>
> You are in a sticky situation, but guess what?
> I'd wager one of the district managers has bowel
> woes. You aren't alone. I'm not suggesting
> bringing up bowels directly at lunch, but there
> might be other ways to share discomfort.
>
> Cracker Barrel I'm sorry Sliced. That sawdust
> gravy is responsible for cruel and unusual bowel
> pains.
Hey there BO!
I dodged a bullet yesterday. When I met my co-workers for breakfast I mentioned that golden coral is open for breakfast on Fridays and that is where we went. I had fruit and a multi-grain bagel. I looked at the piles of bacon and sausage that were rather tempting but I said to myself WWBOD? I stuck with bowel friendly food.
I have discovered a little trick for better bowel movements. As part of my job I have to visit some of our area jails from time to time. I have noticed that quite often the prisoners put a towel or a blanket over their head while they are pooping. I have tried this at home and found that for some reason it helps me relax more and makes for a more complete evacuation.
Happy trails BO! I am going on a little business trip to western TN so you may not hear from me for a while. Stay strong and let me know if the towel over the head thing works for you.
Your brother in brown,
Sliced
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Anon Doc
()
Date: January 31, 2015 07:56AM
User name Sliced,
As a medical professional, I hope you'll seek out an appointment with a board certified GI.
It would behoove you to do this, rather than discussing various medical ailments with idiots such as Blooming and BEH.
Their write ups show a lack of maturity
As a medical professional, I hope you'll seek out an appointment with a board certified GI.
It would behoove you to do this, rather than discussing various medical ailments with idiots such as Blooming and BEH.
Their write ups show a lack of maturity
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: January 31, 2015 08:19AM
Funny how Anon Dicks contributions to this thread are about the most response you'll get out of the vast majority of Ano Recto practitioners.
At their offices, you'll hardly get a grunt, much less any real action on your chronic IBS, or other lower digestive system disorder.
I'll bet, in spite of his "maturity", Anon Dicks patients are as frustrated as Bloomy, Gadorsky and myself are.
Anon Dick is the typical plastic surgeon wannabe, whose lack of skills and talent condemned him to the bottom and least prestigious of the medical services.
As is painfully obvious by his writings, Anon Dick is indifferent, judgemental and totally inept as a healthcare provider, unfortunatly typical among the underachieving proctologists available to us.
At their offices, you'll hardly get a grunt, much less any real action on your chronic IBS, or other lower digestive system disorder.
I'll bet, in spite of his "maturity", Anon Dicks patients are as frustrated as Bloomy, Gadorsky and myself are.
Anon Dick is the typical plastic surgeon wannabe, whose lack of skills and talent condemned him to the bottom and least prestigious of the medical services.
As is painfully obvious by his writings, Anon Dick is indifferent, judgemental and totally inept as a healthcare provider, unfortunatly typical among the underachieving proctologists available to us.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Anon Doc
()
Date: January 31, 2015 11:12AM
User name BEH, great write up.
Be sure to get off of your high horse.
Did you at least graduate from high school? Vocational maybe?
The GI field offers among the best and brightest doctors. Only neurologists have higher IQ's.
Be sure to get off of your high horse.
Did you at least graduate from high school? Vocational maybe?
The GI field offers among the best and brightest doctors. Only neurologists have higher IQ's.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 31, 2015 01:52PM
I will respond after some shit is taken care of.
Don't listen to the doc sliced.
Don't listen to the doc sliced.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Anon Doc
()
Date: January 31, 2015 05:49PM
Username Sliced and others following up these obtuse, obnoxious write ups, I'd highly recommend a visit to your Gastrointestinal Specialist.
You'll see medical care of unparalleled diligence, and find relief. It's our job to help your digestive system perform adequately, and prevent disease such as colon cancer.
These blubbering fools have tried to make a GI appointment sound horrible, when it could potentially save your life.
You'll see medical care of unparalleled diligence, and find relief. It's our job to help your digestive system perform adequately, and prevent disease such as colon cancer.
These blubbering fools have tried to make a GI appointment sound horrible, when it could potentially save your life.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: January 31, 2015 07:06PM
My ass feels like I passed the head of a decapitated journalist from Japan.
Anon Doc, I wish you could feel this cement bag in your bowels for just a day.
Yet all you have are torture devices you call scopes.
How are your bowels. Would you like one of those protruding metallic objects up in you?
Anon Doc, I wish you could feel this cement bag in your bowels for just a day.
Yet all you have are torture devices you call scopes.
How are your bowels. Would you like one of those protruding metallic objects up in you?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Mr Brown Underwear
()
Date: January 31, 2015 08:09PM
At least you are still continent. I'd trade everything not to wear Depends everyday. What you have is nothing to complain about
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Diaper Boy
()
Date: January 31, 2015 09:47PM
Mr Brown Underwear Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> At least you are still continent. I'd trade
> everything not to wear Depends everyday. What you
> have is nothing to complain about
Attachments:
-------------------------------------------------------
> At least you are still continent. I'd trade
> everything not to wear Depends everyday. What you
> have is nothing to complain about
Attachments:
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion
()
Date: February 01, 2015 08:05AM
That's a disturbing picture, but even though I am sorry for Mr. Brown, I'm tired of his shit.
Last night was an ambonination and my fault.
I couldn't resist the Popeye fried chicken, and paid an ungodly price for my transgressions.
Nope I will not need to go to confession, as plenty of one's were made last night. Plus no priest will visit my bathroom and exorcise that.
Last night was an ambonination and my fault.
I couldn't resist the Popeye fried chicken, and paid an ungodly price for my transgressions.
Nope I will not need to go to confession, as plenty of one's were made last night. Plus no priest will visit my bathroom and exorcise that.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion bye
()
Date: February 01, 2015 08:09AM
Blooming Onion
bye
bye
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 01, 2015 11:36AM
Anon Doc Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Username Sliced and others following up these
> obtuse, obnoxious write ups, I'd highly recommend
> a visit to your Gastrointestinal Specialist.
>
> You'll see medical care of unparalleled diligence,
> and find relief. It's our job to help your
> digestive system perform adequately, and prevent
> disease such as colon cancer.
>
> These blubbering fools have tried to make a GI
> appointment sound horrible, when it could
> potentially save your life.
Says the guy who has a custom carrying case for his Rectoscope, and carries a jar of Vaseline in his glove compartment.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Username Sliced and others following up these
> obtuse, obnoxious write ups, I'd highly recommend
> a visit to your Gastrointestinal Specialist.
>
> You'll see medical care of unparalleled diligence,
> and find relief. It's our job to help your
> digestive system perform adequately, and prevent
> disease such as colon cancer.
>
> These blubbering fools have tried to make a GI
> appointment sound horrible, when it could
> potentially save your life.
Says the guy who has a custom carrying case for his Rectoscope, and carries a jar of Vaseline in his glove compartment.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion #2
()
Date: February 01, 2015 12:32PM
Mein Crap, oh I might pen a book on IBS.
To anon doc I presume for taking my user name, you didn't succeed.
To anon doc I presume for taking my user name, you didn't succeed.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Blooming Onion #2
()
Date: February 01, 2015 05:55PM
I'm starting to think perhaps, with my subpar bowels, I might be better off or more grateful than those with superior bowels.
Since being among the underground's advisors of all things brown, I've noticed such hostility from those who roll out #4 #2's with no to minimal difficulty.
You can lock my name up, but I'm not worried. Soon I'll have a new user name. Anyone got bowels I can have?
Since being among the underground's advisors of all things brown, I've noticed such hostility from those who roll out #4 #2's with no to minimal difficulty.
You can lock my name up, but I'm not worried. Soon I'll have a new user name. Anyone got bowels I can have?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 01, 2015 06:48PM
I'd like to thank anon doc, or whomever is the bowel hostile individual here.
While not on the groan throne, I like how this platform allows free speech, even for our lower and upper intestines.
You can try to stop brothers in bowel, but you'll never win.
While not on the groan throne, I like how this platform allows free speech, even for our lower and upper intestines.
You can try to stop brothers in bowel, but you'll never win.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 01, 2015 08:08PM
Chris Collinsworth, Al Michaels, Bob Costas= troika of fantastic bowels.
It's halftime now, and I believe while both coaches have excellent bowels, give the edge to the guy on the Patriots sideline.
Katy Perry's bowels should be fine, during the halftime show, but I'm concerned for Lenny Kravitz.
It's halftime now, and I believe while both coaches have excellent bowels, give the edge to the guy on the Patriots sideline.
Katy Perry's bowels should be fine, during the halftime show, but I'm concerned for Lenny Kravitz.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 01, 2015 09:23PM
Well I hope others do better, because I just have a bad feeling after pizza and wings, I might need a bowel transplant.
The Super Bowl is exciting, but Americans dining choices during the game are horrendous.
No I'm not saying I'm right for eating the garbage I have, but expect a lot of folks tomorrow on the can.
The Super Bowl is exciting, but Americans dining choices during the game are horrendous.
No I'm not saying I'm right for eating the garbage I have, but expect a lot of folks tomorrow on the can.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 04:21AM
I've been up all night, and with screaming bowels, I'd appreciate it of Elton John was in my bathroom playing "Candles on the Wind."
My rear end hurts, and I don't think a patch kit will work here.
My rear end hurts, and I don't think a patch kit will work here.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Gordorsky
()
Date: February 02, 2015 08:02AM
I hope going to a job fair will go okay.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 08:26AM
Gordo a job fair makes my bowels churn brown butter, but you'll do just fine.
Keep things including aromas close to the vest. Remember your bowels don't define you.
Now to unload a large odd shaped pitchfork.
Keep things including aromas close to the vest. Remember your bowels don't define you.
Now to unload a large odd shaped pitchfork.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 11:12AM
I called it a long time ago. That Pete Carroll or Belichick would win the Super Bowl.
All the haters, hate no more, as I was correct about these coaches with spectacular bowels.
Belichick looked like a man who cleared a #4 #2. Caroll did too, until the end. My guess is he and the Bristol stool guide aren't having a lovely day.
All the haters, hate no more, as I was correct about these coaches with spectacular bowels.
Belichick looked like a man who cleared a #4 #2. Caroll did too, until the end. My guess is he and the Bristol stool guide aren't having a lovely day.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 02, 2015 11:18AM
Even though I consumed only vegetables and dip at the SuperBowl buffet, I still will be looking forward to attempting to eliminate a Frigidare through a shotglass three days from now.
I dread the thought of having only eaten wings,sliders and other non fiberous foods. Surgical extraction anyone?
I dread the thought of having only eaten wings,sliders and other non fiberous foods. Surgical extraction anyone?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 01:38PM
BEH, are you at 30 hours instead of 36? I'm curious because of the thirty feet through the intestines average time frame, and also I extend early condolences to your bowels after the Super Bowl.
This time of year is fun for most, and I hope they enjoyed the game with chips and dip.
While chips with the melted cheese sounds good, the ramifications are not pleasant. It's the bowel equivalent of arsenic in a drink.
That bag of cement wouldn't be a joy to digest.
Now it's a month away, but March Madness can wreak havoc on one's bowels.
This time of year is fun for most, and I hope they enjoyed the game with chips and dip.
While chips with the melted cheese sounds good, the ramifications are not pleasant. It's the bowel equivalent of arsenic in a drink.
That bag of cement wouldn't be a joy to digest.
Now it's a month away, but March Madness can wreak havoc on one's bowels.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
sliced onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 02:49PM
Hey BO! They can register your name but they cant take away from your outstanding service to bowel brothers everywhere. I am on a business trip and currently in a motel just off the interstate highway. Finding bowel friendly food out on the road has proven to be quite a challenge. I have turned to subway in desperation. The turkey on whole wheat sub loaded with veggies is my go to meal. Driving for hours on the highway can be a real bad situation if your bowels are not in order. So far I am keeping it number 5 but I have a meeting at ihop in the morning and that scares me. At least I will have time to return to my room in the morning before getting on the highway so I will have the chance to drop a load before setting out on a 5 hour drive.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 02, 2015 05:58PM
My oh my Sliced,
Your traveling alone is a challenge to your bowels. Do you get "back pay?" I feel sorry for your woe, and while I just squeezed off a third trimester anon doc fetus sized crap, I feel sympathetic to your plight.
One thing, can you purchase a smaller sized portable Bristol a Stool Guide? #5 #2s aren't ideal, but you have to squeeze with what you are handled.
Best of luck on your business trip, I hope you can find fruits and veggies also, but your plan on the fly is fairly brown friendly.
Good luck to you and your bowels, think teamwork!
Your traveling alone is a challenge to your bowels. Do you get "back pay?" I feel sorry for your woe, and while I just squeezed off a third trimester anon doc fetus sized crap, I feel sympathetic to your plight.
One thing, can you purchase a smaller sized portable Bristol a Stool Guide? #5 #2s aren't ideal, but you have to squeeze with what you are handled.
Best of luck on your business trip, I hope you can find fruits and veggies also, but your plan on the fly is fairly brown friendly.
Good luck to you and your bowels, think teamwork!
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 03, 2015 07:18AM
I first must thank the user who locked out "Blooming Onion. "Now I have an inbox, and have heard from people with bowel problems.
It's a shame, the hostility by those with superior teutonic like bowels, but it is what it is.
I'm going to start up breakfast, and then will answer publicly a question on piles.
It's a shame, the hostility by those with superior teutonic like bowels, but it is what it is.
I'm going to start up breakfast, and then will answer publicly a question on piles.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 03, 2015 08:47AM
False alarm but my stomach, is probably cueing up for a hydrogen bomb.
Anyhow piles are hemmerhoids, most often caused by straining. IBS folks are more likely to get piles in or around the anal cavity area.
First of all there are two types of roids. Actually three. If you don't believe me Google George Brett and hemmerhoids.
Yet the ones you'll encounter are internal or external. They can make your bowels scream, and bleeding is not uncommon.
If you have red toilet paper, it's ok to worry a bit, but most likely it's not anal cancer.
More likely than not it's piles, and the best news is usually these resolve by themselves.
Anyhow piles are hemmerhoids, most often caused by straining. IBS folks are more likely to get piles in or around the anal cavity area.
First of all there are two types of roids. Actually three. If you don't believe me Google George Brett and hemmerhoids.
Yet the ones you'll encounter are internal or external. They can make your bowels scream, and bleeding is not uncommon.
If you have red toilet paper, it's ok to worry a bit, but most likely it's not anal cancer.
More likely than not it's piles, and the best news is usually these resolve by themselves.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 03, 2015 01:04PM
I feel blessed to have seen the moon landing in 1969. That was one giant step, and thank goodness Neil Armstrong's bowels held up. Same for Buzz Aldrin, and although not as important Michael Collins.
He at least could have taken a shit while flying over the moon, until the Eagle blasted off the lunar surface.
I'm about to drop off a space shuttle. 10,9, 8 let the screaming begin.
He at least could have taken a shit while flying over the moon, until the Eagle blasted off the lunar surface.
I'm about to drop off a space shuttle. 10,9, 8 let the screaming begin.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 03, 2015 07:07PM
Oh my starfish is going to need an alignment.
Film at 11
Film at 11
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Anon Doc
()
Date: February 03, 2015 08:08PM
How is medical school going for you blubbering idiots? NOVA does not have that I am afraid.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 03, 2015 09:47PM
Oh, Anon Dick, mellow out.
It's not our fault that you wanted to do boob jobs and face lifts for Hollywood starlets, and wound up skewering schphinters for HMO's and PPO's.
If only you quacks could provide a modicum of releif.
As useless as you are, you insist on being arrogant.
Get a manicure, take that clothespin off your nose and get busy finding some relief for your patients.
It's not our fault that you wanted to do boob jobs and face lifts for Hollywood starlets, and wound up skewering schphinters for HMO's and PPO's.
If only you quacks could provide a modicum of releif.
As useless as you are, you insist on being arrogant.
Get a manicure, take that clothespin off your nose and get busy finding some relief for your patients.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 04, 2015 07:00AM
I couldn't agree more with BEH, brother in bowel, who's seen firsthand and here, the absolute lack of humanity regarding GI's. Yes they are bottom feeders literally and figuratively, but later on I'll look up their average salary and post it. My hunch is they make a shitload of money for doing next to nothing.
Last nights crap was awful, and I'm using a lot of witch hazel this morning. There's not going to be a lot of activity today, and I'm hoping that people will pray for my bowels. May they at least recover somewhat, before being thrown through Gitmo once again.
Groundhogs Day the movie, was true for those with IBS. It never ends.
Last nights crap was awful, and I'm using a lot of witch hazel this morning. There's not going to be a lot of activity today, and I'm hoping that people will pray for my bowels. May they at least recover somewhat, before being thrown through Gitmo once again.
Groundhogs Day the movie, was true for those with IBS. It never ends.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 04, 2015 07:48AM
Unbelievable. Okay my research shows the average anal doctor makes $350,000 a year.
These subhumans with a white and sometimes brown coat, get to use torture devices and get paid so well.
I'll try to get an average for Fairfax/NOVA as my guess is it's at least 15 to 20% higher than the national amount.
Anon doc and his sadistic friends haven't accomplished shit yet have fat pockets.
These subhumans with a white and sometimes brown coat, get to use torture devices and get paid so well.
I'll try to get an average for Fairfax/NOVA as my guess is it's at least 15 to 20% higher than the national amount.
Anon doc and his sadistic friends haven't accomplished shit yet have fat pockets.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
WTF6757
()
Date: February 04, 2015 08:14AM
Compared to some doctors, while good money, it's not all that much.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 04, 2015 10:58AM
He doesn't deserve shit. He might be called "doctor" but I bet my bowels he was last in the class. I'm wondering what night school he went to.
Anyhow I think it's okay to say that anon doc and his compatriots in constipation, could deserve pay cuts.
Aside from sticking tubes up my ass, or his fingers to discuss his mock draft, what does he do? I could get the same off Craigslist if my cup of shit.
Instead and I'm grateful for it, because anon doc shows the callous and downright vile treatment towards those with bowel problems.
We seek help and they mock us.
Anyhow I think it's okay to say that anon doc and his compatriots in constipation, could deserve pay cuts.
Aside from sticking tubes up my ass, or his fingers to discuss his mock draft, what does he do? I could get the same off Craigslist if my cup of shit.
Instead and I'm grateful for it, because anon doc shows the callous and downright vile treatment towards those with bowel problems.
We seek help and they mock us.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 04, 2015 02:26PM
That was not Jordan's "earth shaking response. "
It's okay Fairfax County, just Onions bowels having seismic activity.
It's okay Fairfax County, just Onions bowels having seismic activity.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Deadly combo
()
Date: February 04, 2015 04:10PM
For what it's worth, I've been drinking more water throughout the day (one of many New Year's resolutions) and eating a piece of fruit for dessert after lunch. Even more regular than usual. Might help at least a little bit.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 04, 2015 09:13PM
Deadly thats smart. Congrats to you for making 2015 more positive for your bowels.
Water is huge whether for IBS or not. It not only speeds up the process, but can increase your chances of a #4 #2.
I applaud you and your bowels should, with a brown ink pen, write you a thank you note for such consideration.
Water is huge whether for IBS or not. It not only speeds up the process, but can increase your chances of a #4 #2.
I applaud you and your bowels should, with a brown ink pen, write you a thank you note for such consideration.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 06:08AM
I think Bobbi Kristina just took a thirty foot ride through my intestines. Report that TMZ.
Oh that's not the ideal way to start the day.
Oh that's not the ideal way to start the day.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 08:25AM
Okay, to follow up on someone's excellent question, let's get back to piles for a moment. IBS folks know these well mostly from straining on the groan throne.
There are internal and external ones. My personal opinion is internal ones are the worst. Bloody bowel movements are both scary and disgusting. You don't want to push out a bright red #2.
There are internal and external ones. My personal opinion is internal ones are the worst. Bloody bowel movements are both scary and disgusting. You don't want to push out a bright red #2.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 08:29AM
Here is a diagram of both pains in the bowels,
Attachments:
Attachments:
Border Security is CHEAPER Than Wars
Posted by:
WingNut
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:03AM
Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known as Blooming Onion?
idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam
Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.
Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/15/2015 10:00PM by WingNut.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
hurr durr
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:22AM
WingNut Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known as
> Blooming Onion?
Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are you a libtard or a conservatard?
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known as
> Blooming Onion?
Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are you a libtard or a conservatard?
Obama's Approval Rating with Military? 15%
Posted by:
WingNut
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:25AM
hurr durr Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> WingNut Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known
> as
> > Blooming Onion?
>
>
> Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are
> you a libtard or a conservatard?
Hey I asked politely.
No need to be rude, Mister.
-------------------------------------------------------
> WingNut Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known
> as
> > Blooming Onion?
>
>
> Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are
> you a libtard or a conservatard?
Hey I asked politely.
No need to be rude, Mister.
idontlikebeingrightaboutshitlikethisbutiam
Edited 21 time(s). Last edit at 5/31/1967 05:57AM by WingNut.
Last edit at 11/30/2015 01:37PM Last edit at 5/14/2015 03:52PM Last edit at 1/28/2014 05:57AM Last edit at 11/29/2015 01:10PM Last edit at 3/14/2011 11:52PM Last edit at 7/20/2012 04:07AM
Last edit at 6/29/2013 11:18PM Last edit at 3/19/2011 01:02PM Last edit at 3/26/2012 09:07PM
Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/13/2015 12:53PM by WingNut.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:36AM
Decorum please gentleman.
This is a vital thread, possibly the last bastion for the sufferers of various bowel disorders.
No place here for political quibbling, although there are indications that bowel habits and party preference are related in some cases.
This is a vital thread, possibly the last bastion for the sufferers of various bowel disorders.
No place here for political quibbling, although there are indications that bowel habits and party preference are related in some cases.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
libs hate America.
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:41AM
hurr durr Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> WingNut Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known
> as
> > Blooming Onion?
>
>
> Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are
> you a libtard or a conservatard?
Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs cannot control what they eat and then blame ibs when their digest system poops out. Libs expect the government to feed them, clothe them, school them, etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of themselves.
-------------------------------------------------------
> WingNut Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known
> as
> > Blooming Onion?
>
>
> Of course he is you teabagging moron. Brown, are
> you a libtard or a conservatard?
Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs cannot control what they eat and then blame ibs when their digest system poops out. Libs expect the government to feed them, clothe them, school them, etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of themselves.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 05, 2015 09:53AM
libs hate America. Wrote:
> Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs cannot
> control what they eat and then blame ibs when
> their digest system poops out. Libs expect the
> government to feed them, clothe them, school them,
> etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of
> themselves.
It appears you're severely anal retentive, politics nonwithstanding.
Would you like to share some of your favorite personal rectal stories?
> Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs cannot
> control what they eat and then blame ibs when
> their digest system poops out. Libs expect the
> government to feed them, clothe them, school them,
> etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of
> themselves.
It appears you're severely anal retentive, politics nonwithstanding.
Would you like to share some of your favorite personal rectal stories?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
I - BS
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:04AM
BEH Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> libs hate America. Wrote:
> > Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs
> cannot
> > control what they eat and then blame ibs when
> > their digest system poops out. Libs expect the
> > government to feed them, clothe them, school
> them,
> > etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of
> > themselves.
>
> It appears you're severely anal retentive,
> politics nonwithstanding.
>
> Would you like to share some of your favorite
> personal rectal stories?
Truth hurts, lib?
-------------------------------------------------------
> libs hate America. Wrote:
> > Everyone in this thread is a lib. Only libs
> cannot
> > control what they eat and then blame ibs when
> > their digest system poops out. Libs expect the
> > government to feed them, clothe them, school
> them,
> > etc. Libs are not capable of taking care of
> > themselves.
>
> It appears you're severely anal retentive,
> politics nonwithstanding.
>
> Would you like to share some of your favorite
> personal rectal stories?
Truth hurts, lib?
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:07AM
WingNut Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known as
> Blooming Onion?
Hi Wingnut yes I am, and despite what this moron is bringing up, bowels are a non partisan issue.
Who knows, this lump of crap or anon doc I suspect, could be behind locking out the name "Blooming Onion." They tried to stop the free speech of the bowel trodden, but despite hours on the groan throne eliminating cement bags or screaming like a deer shot with a .22, the brown goes on.
I appreciate your support, and would be interested in learning how your bowels are this morning.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Brown Onion are you the Artist Formerly Known as
> Blooming Onion?
Hi Wingnut yes I am, and despite what this moron is bringing up, bowels are a non partisan issue.
Who knows, this lump of crap or anon doc I suspect, could be behind locking out the name "Blooming Onion." They tried to stop the free speech of the bowel trodden, but despite hours on the groan throne eliminating cement bags or screaming like a deer shot with a .22, the brown goes on.
I appreciate your support, and would be interested in learning how your bowels are this morning.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
mudbutt
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:29AM
I foolishly ate an entire bag of Cheetos, the Jalapeno cheddar ones. They were good but I woke up today with a nasty taste in my mouth and explosive diarrhea. The diarrhea is really bad to the point where the outside of my asshole is starting to sting with every splurge on the groan throne. I am hoping it will subside soon because I've got nothing left in me but water.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:34AM
mudbutt Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I foolishly ate an entire bag of Cheetos, the
> Jalapeno cheddar ones. They were good but I woke
> up today with a nasty taste in my mouth and
> explosive diarrhea. The diarrhea is really bad to
> the point where the outside of my asshole is
> starting to sting with every splurge on the groan
> throne. I am hoping it will subside soon because
> I've got nothing left in me but water.
My goodness mud butt. That's painful and I hope your bowels make a full recovery.
Don't worry I won't judge you, but the odor from that dump must be enough to burn nose hairs off.
-------------------------------------------------------
> I foolishly ate an entire bag of Cheetos, the
> Jalapeno cheddar ones. They were good but I woke
> up today with a nasty taste in my mouth and
> explosive diarrhea. The diarrhea is really bad to
> the point where the outside of my asshole is
> starting to sting with every splurge on the groan
> throne. I am hoping it will subside soon because
> I've got nothing left in me but water.
My goodness mud butt. That's painful and I hope your bowels make a full recovery.
Don't worry I won't judge you, but the odor from that dump must be enough to burn nose hairs off.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
mudbutt
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:44AM
Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> mudbutt Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I foolishly ate an entire bag of Cheetos, the
> > Jalapeno cheddar ones. They were good but I
> woke
> > up today with a nasty taste in my mouth and
> > explosive diarrhea. The diarrhea is really bad
> to
> > the point where the outside of my asshole is
> > starting to sting with every splurge on the
> groan
> > throne. I am hoping it will subside soon
> because
> > I've got nothing left in me but water.
>
> My goodness mud butt. That's painful and I hope
> your bowels make a full recovery.
>
> Don't worry I won't judge you, but the odor from
> that dump must be enough to burn nose hairs off.
Thanks Brown, I think it will end soon. It is extremely pungent, so much so that I'm afraid the neighbors might complain. I'll have to invest in some gas masks to loan them for times like these.
-------------------------------------------------------
> mudbutt Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I foolishly ate an entire bag of Cheetos, the
> > Jalapeno cheddar ones. They were good but I
> woke
> > up today with a nasty taste in my mouth and
> > explosive diarrhea. The diarrhea is really bad
> to
> > the point where the outside of my asshole is
> > starting to sting with every splurge on the
> groan
> > throne. I am hoping it will subside soon
> because
> > I've got nothing left in me but water.
>
> My goodness mud butt. That's painful and I hope
> your bowels make a full recovery.
>
> Don't worry I won't judge you, but the odor from
> that dump must be enough to burn nose hairs off.
Thanks Brown, I think it will end soon. It is extremely pungent, so much so that I'm afraid the neighbors might complain. I'll have to invest in some gas masks to loan them for times like these.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
BEH
()
Date: February 05, 2015 10:53AM
I - BS Wrote:
> Truth hurts, lib?
When it comes to IBS, yes, the truth is very painful.
Its all too apparent you're in pain too, brother.
We're here for you. We know what its like.
One suggestion...do not read The American Conservative Magazine while constipated on the bowl
> Truth hurts, lib?
When it comes to IBS, yes, the truth is very painful.
Its all too apparent you're in pain too, brother.
We're here for you. We know what its like.
One suggestion...do not read The American Conservative Magazine while constipated on the bowl
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 12:18PM
I agree with BEH's solid advice.
BEH or anyone else here with IBS, if you could inbox me or if publicly comment, about once a month or so is your underwear got a slight brown glaze in the area closest to the exit ramp?
I usually read encyclopedias, but recently had a television installed in my bathroom.
Mudbutt I do hope the smell dissipates as soon as possible. For whatever reason the fermentation of feces lingers, and can even peel the wallpaper.
BEH or anyone else here with IBS, if you could inbox me or if publicly comment, about once a month or so is your underwear got a slight brown glaze in the area closest to the exit ramp?
I usually read encyclopedias, but recently had a television installed in my bathroom.
Mudbutt I do hope the smell dissipates as soon as possible. For whatever reason the fermentation of feces lingers, and can even peel the wallpaper.
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
Brown Onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 01:16PM
I have to say I don't think children have IBS, but that's just a guess. Perhaps anonymous dick can provide medical info, but a good question in my inbox.
It's my belief at worst, a young person can get constipation. Their bowels don't have a lot of mileage.
I do think obstructed bowels can happen. If I remember correctly, the young girl in the movie "Poltergeist" succumbed to a bowel related malady.
Attachments:
It's my belief at worst, a young person can get constipation. Their bowels don't have a lot of mileage.
I do think obstructed bowels can happen. If I remember correctly, the young girl in the movie "Poltergeist" succumbed to a bowel related malady.
Attachments:
Re: Foods Your Bowels Dont Want
Posted by:
sliced onion
()
Date: February 05, 2015 02:11PM
Brown Onion Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> My oh my Sliced,
>
> Your traveling alone is a challenge to your
> bowels. Do you get "back pay?" I feel sorry for
> your woe, and while I just squeezed off a third
> trimester anon doc fetus sized crap, I feel
> sympathetic to your plight.
>
> One thing, can you purchase a smaller sized
> portable Bristol a Stool Guide? #5 #2s aren't
> ideal, but you have to squeeze with what you are
> handled.
>
> Best of luck on your business trip, I hope you can
> find fruits and veggies also, but your plan on the
> fly is fairly brown friendly.
>
> Good luck to you and your bowels, think teamwork!
Thanks BO. Tonight is my last motel night and I will be home tomorrow. I had a slip up yesterday and ate a wendys double with cheese value meal. I awoke at 3 am with churning bowels and I really put the plumbing at the days inn to the test. I churned out a #2 #2 and it was pretty rough. I had to take an immodiam a-d this morning and now everything down there is out of wack. The pill worked a little too well and now I fear the starfish troopers escape hatch may be stuck closed for some time. If I can just make it home tomorrow I will have the weekend to recover.
-------------------------------------------------------
> My oh my Sliced,
>
> Your traveling alone is a challenge to your
> bowels. Do you get "back pay?" I feel sorry for
> your woe, and while I just squeezed off a third
> trimester anon doc fetus sized crap, I feel
> sympathetic to your plight.
>
> One thing, can you purchase a smaller sized
> portable Bristol a Stool Guide? #5 #2s aren't
> ideal, but you have to squeeze with what you are
> handled.
>
> Best of luck on your business trip, I hope you can
> find fruits and veggies also, but your plan on the
> fly is fairly brown friendly.
>
> Good luck to you and your bowels, think teamwork!
Thanks BO. Tonight is my last motel night and I will be home tomorrow. I had a slip up yesterday and ate a wendys double with cheese value meal. I awoke at 3 am with churning bowels and I really put the plumbing at the days inn to the test. I churned out a #2 #2 and it was pretty rough. I had to take an immodiam a-d this morning and now everything down there is out of wack. The pill worked a little too well and now I fear the starfish troopers escape hatch may be stuck closed for some time. If I can just make it home tomorrow I will have the weekend to recover.