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Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Amir Mahlkmalbaf ()
Date: June 17, 2013 06:31PM

Hello,

I am a local filmmaker and have been an occasional poster/longtime lurker on this forum. I have produced, written and directed several short films and have been thinking about making a documentary about Fairfax Underground and its posters for some time now. This would be incredibly fertile territory for an Errol Morris-style investigative, quirky documentary about the lives of normal people involved in unusual circumstances. The years-long feuds, grudges, and alleged stalking and vandalism alone would be compelling material to document. If any longtime posters would be willing to conduct on-camera interviews, this would be ideal. We will delve deep into the secret lives of seemingly normal Fairfaxians who lead double lives as troublemakers, trolls, and outrageous characters online, and how these secret lives (and sometimes real lives) intersect.

We will be in pre-production for the next few months; this message is simply meant to send out a feeler, to gauge interest. I will check back soon and if the response is positive will post my contact information forthwith.

Sincerely,
Amir Mahlkmalbaf

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Young Curmudgeon ()
Date: June 17, 2013 06:34PM

Obvious troll, anyone?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: horse rider ()
Date: June 17, 2013 06:47PM

find a retarded person to play the role of Alias

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: pgens ()
Date: June 17, 2013 07:20PM

Know the history of Fairfax Underground - check.

Will appear on camera so Inkahootz and others can stalk my ass - nope.

But yes, obvious troll is obvious.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: What About...? ()
Date: June 17, 2013 07:21PM

Digging up the deceased objects of our revile?
You could have a seance and interview them.

Timmy
Carlos Hernandez
Wyatt... That kid who got stabbed.
The kid who got shot at IHOP.

Who can name other departed?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Vexxxed ()
Date: June 17, 2013 07:25PM

He forgot the part where everyone is supposed to show up at Denny's at 7:30, wearing a bright yellow shirt.

And make sure you park so he can photograph your tag number.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Stabitha ()
Date: June 17, 2013 07:31PM

What's the pay scale?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Uh Huh... ()
Date: June 17, 2013 08:31PM

Mahl-kmal-baf. Really? Try harder next time.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Amir Mahlkmalbaf ()
Date: June 17, 2013 08:43PM

Uh Huh... Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Mahl-kmal-baf. Really? Try harder next time.


I am an Iranian-American, sir. I went to university here in the states and I assure you this is not a troll thread. I have trolled in the past, as have we all at one time or another, but this is sincere. I think there is a very compelling documentary here.

Cheers,
Amir

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: June 17, 2013 09:09PM

Amir Mahlkmalbaf Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I have trolled in the
> past, as have we all at one time or another,

Speak for yourself. I have never trolled here and I think there are others that haven't.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: The Unknown Poster ()
Date: June 17, 2013 09:27PM

I'd do it with one of those voice changer things and silhouetted like they do the Mafia snitches.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: June 17, 2013 10:38PM

There is going to have to be long term drama to make it work. One of the posters will need to get one of the females that post here pregnant right after she takes a bunch of fertility pills. That way we can have an octomom in Fairfax.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: documentarian ()
Date: June 17, 2013 11:54PM

I think that actors portraying us in a dramatized version of events would be cooler

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 18, 2013 03:08AM

horse rider Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> find a retarded person to play the role of Alias

And:

A chubby gay guy with blond curls, who hates black people and women, to play eesh.

A gay atheist, who likes women with penises, but hates Catholics and Jews, to play Numbers.

An angry, depressive, arrogant asshole, who hates everyone, but pretends to care, to play Mephisto.

The various incarnations of these three..... too many names, but all the same sad faces.


I could write the screen play.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: AT&T ()
Date: June 18, 2013 03:32AM

Alias Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> horse rider Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > find a retarded person to play the role of
> Alias
>
> And:
>
> A chubby gay guy with blond curls, who hates black
> people and women, to play eesh.
>
> A gay atheist, who likes women with penises, but
> hates Catholics and Jews, to play Numbers.
>
> An angry, depressive, arrogant asshole, who hates
> everyone, but pretends to care, to play
> Mephisto.
>
> The various incarnations of these three..... too
> many names, but all the same sad faces.
>
>
> I could write the screen play.


Maybe they could get some angry shithead to play you, how would you like that you big idiot?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:03AM

documentarian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I think that actors portraying us in a dramatized
> version of events would be cooler




I want Steve Buscemi to play eesh, Viggo Mortensen to play Mephisto, and Ezra Miller for Numbers.


lizzie would be played by Zoë Saldana, and Vexxxed will be portrayed by Armin Shimerman.


Shelley Duvall would be Alias, since they both look alike.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:22AM

AT&T Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Maybe they could get some angry shithead to play
> you, how would you like that you big idiot?


LOL............ !!

No, if I'm writing the screenplay, the Alias character will not be played by a big idiot.

I'm thinking a Katharine Hepburn or Anne Bancroft type.

What are your thoughts?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: friskydingo ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:24AM

It mite work if steve buscemi was in a fat suit

 

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: friskydingo ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:27AM

helen mirren should be alias

 

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: no no no ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:29AM

friskydingo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> helen mirren should be alias


Ingrid Bergman. Much more beautiful. And elegant.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:36AM

I'm still laughing at....

How would you like that, you big idiot.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:41AM

Thank you for making me laugh...

Now, I can sleep.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: BEH ()
Date: June 18, 2013 09:58AM

friskydingo Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> helen mirren should be alias

Actually, I'd like Alias to be played by Gabourey Sidibe

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Numbers ()
Date: June 18, 2013 10:59AM

Alias should be played by Linda Hunt (from Kindergarten Cop)
Attachments:
MV5BOTcyMjA0MzY4Ml5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTcwNzE4NzM0Nw@@._V1._SX640_SY427_.jpg

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: June 18, 2013 03:18PM

Amir Mahlkmalbaf Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hello,
>
> I am a local filmmaker and have been an occasional
> poster/longtime lurker on this forum. I have
> produced, written and directed several short films
> and have been thinking about making a documentary
> about Fairfax Underground and its posters for some
> time now. This would be incredibly fertile
> territory for an Errol Morris-style investigative,
> quirky documentary about the lives of normal
> people involved in unusual circumstances. The
> years-long feuds, grudges, and alleged stalking
> and vandalism alone would be compelling material
> to document. If any longtime posters would be
> willing to conduct on-camera interviews, this
> would be ideal. We will delve deep into the secret
> lives of seemingly normal Fairfaxians who lead
> double lives as troublemakers, trolls, and
> outrageous characters online, and how these secret
> lives (and sometimes real lives) intersect.
>
> We will be in pre-production for the next few
> months; this message is simply meant to send out a
> feeler, to gauge interest. I will check back soon
> and if the response is positive will post my
> contact information forthwith.
>
> Sincerely,
> Amir Mahlkmalbaf

It would be an interesting concept and I'd probably watch it, but limiting yourself to just Fairfax Underground isn't going to provide you with enough source material. That's assuming anyone even agrees to participate in it. Think about it: let's say there's twenty active, outrageous characters/trolls. Being generous, let's say ten of those agree. You'll find that seven of those ten are completely boring and not worth pursuing. Of the three that are left, maybe two will be the exaggerated, cartoonish human charicature that makes these niche documentaries interesting. Suddenly, you're making a film about two people, and you've drifted away from your core concept.

That said, I'd probably participate but end up being one of the boring seven. That's assuming I'm even notable enough to be in it.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Amir Mahlkmalbaf ()
Date: June 18, 2013 03:37PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Amir Mahlkmalbaf Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hello,
> >
> > I am a local filmmaker and have been an
> occasional
> > poster/longtime lurker on this forum. I have
> > produced, written and directed several short
> films
> > and have been thinking about making a
> documentary
> > about Fairfax Underground and its posters for
> some
> > time now. This would be incredibly fertile
> > territory for an Errol Morris-style
> investigative,
> > quirky documentary about the lives of normal
> > people involved in unusual circumstances. The
> > years-long feuds, grudges, and alleged stalking
> > and vandalism alone would be compelling
> material
> > to document. If any longtime posters would be
> > willing to conduct on-camera interviews, this
> > would be ideal. We will delve deep into the
> secret
> > lives of seemingly normal Fairfaxians who lead
> > double lives as troublemakers, trolls, and
> > outrageous characters online, and how these
> secret
> > lives (and sometimes real lives) intersect.
> >
> > We will be in pre-production for the next few
> > months; this message is simply meant to send out
> a
> > feeler, to gauge interest. I will check back
> soon
> > and if the response is positive will post my
> > contact information forthwith.
> >
> > Sincerely,
> > Amir Mahlkmalbaf
>
> It would be an interesting concept and I'd
> probably watch it, but limiting yourself to just
> Fairfax Underground isn't going to provide you
> with enough source material. That's assuming
> anyone even agrees to participate in it. Think
> about it: let's say there's twenty active,
> outrageous characters/trolls. Being generous,
> let's say ten of those agree. You'll find that
> seven of those ten are completely boring and not
> worth pursuing. Of the three that are left, maybe
> two will be the exaggerated, cartoonish human
> charicature that makes these niche documentaries
> interesting. Suddenly, you're making a film about
> two people, and you've drifted away from your core
> concept.
>
> That said, I'd probably participate but end up
> being one of the boring seven. That's assuming I'm
> even notable enough to be in it.


Thank you for your comments, MrMephisto, and yes, you are certainly one of the notable, longtimer characters here. The concept of the film is just that, however; the stark contrast between the outrageous characters lived out on this internet message board and their (perhaps) 'boring' real-life counterparts. To question those regular (as you might put it, boring) people about what motivates them or has motivated them in the past to live out these grandiose, vulgar, racist, pompous online personas and to engage in years-long feuds (several of which have famously spilled over into real life). This will be about much more than Fairfax Underground; Fairfax Underground will simply be a starting point (as well as the focus) to talk about larger questions of personality and the behaviours we act out under the cloak of 'anonymity'. For example, the Errol Morris documentary Gates of Heaven is centered on the owners and patrons of a pet semetary. That sounds pretty limited in scope, doesn't it? But as we quickly find out, it's about so much more. I highly recommend it.

Eesh, perhaps unfortunately (as I know many will bemoan what could be construed as undeserved attention), will have to be a large part of it. His personal conflicts with the many different people over the years that at this point have become the stuff of local internet legend. It's much like 'road rage'.....most people, unless psychotic, would not behave anywhere near the way they do in person, face to face with other people, without the illusion of safety that a few thousand pounds of steel and glass provide. This will be about how we treat each other when there is the perception (right or wrong) of anonymity and a lack of consequences. In short, it is a study of human behavior filtered through the mechanizations of technology.

We will be refining the concept in the months to come and hopefully will be able to raise the money it will take to produce a feature length documentary.

cheers,
Amir

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Amir Mahlkmalbaf ()
Date: June 18, 2013 03:52PM

While I'm here, I thought I would go ahead and post a short list of the characters I sincerely hope to have involved, if at all possible. And, as someone jokingly stated, I would be willing to consider 'anonymous' interviews complete with voice modulation and keeping the subject completely silhoutted.

eesh
MrMephisto
lizzie
Conie
Mr. Misery
Harry Tuttle
Alias
Genevieve
WashingTone-Locian
inkahootz
Chuck Hoffman
and last but certainly not least, the man himself, Cary


Cheers,
Amir

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: 9kw4t ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:04PM


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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: N79xY ()
Date: June 18, 2013 04:05PM


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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: June 19, 2013 12:15AM

Well, what kind of questions would you ask?

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 19, 2013 01:16AM

Numbers Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alias should be played by Linda Hunt (from
> Kindergarten Cop)


LOL...

I didn't see "Kindergarten Cop", but I did see "The Year of Living Dangerously". Linda Hunt won an Oscar for playing a man...

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: June 19, 2013 01:22AM

Alias Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> I didn't see "Kindergarten Cop", but I did see
> "The Year of Living Dangerously". Linda Hunt won
> an Oscar for playing a man...





You would play a man very well, as it's so unusual for a woman like you to have so much pent up hatred and violent tendencies.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: HE RULES WITH AN IRON EESH ()
Date: June 19, 2013 01:43AM

As the new Supreme Leader and Field Commander of Fairfax Underground, eesh would need a new gettup for the interviews.
.
.
.

.
.
.



.
Attachments:
gaddafi-in-rome-gaddafi-w-004.jpg

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: June 19, 2013 01:58AM

Thanks, but I never liked Gaddafi's uniform. I would probably dress like Karl Ruprecht Kroenen, mask included.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 19, 2013 02:01AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> You would play a man very well

Not as well as you would play a woman.... a chubby woman with SallyBeauty hair extensions.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: June 19, 2013 02:07AM

That's cool, maybe you can wear a strap on and I'll play Sally.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: June 19, 2013 02:17AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> That's cool, maybe you can wear a strap on and
> I'll play Sally.


Be careful; Numbers might fall into a jealous rage.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Duck Hunt ()
Date: March 02, 2014 05:42PM

Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you're part of the team!

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:00PM

Duck Hunt Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when
> you're part of the team!





ferfux,

Is there a reason you bumped this?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: lollollol ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:21PM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
>
>
>
>
> ferfux,
>
> Is there a reason you bumped this?


ferfux is long gone. Why do you accuse everyone of being ferfux?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:24PM

lollollol Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> ferfux is long gone. Why do you accuse everyone of
> being ferfux?




He/you/it, is still here.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Fruppie ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:24PM

lollollol Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > ferfux,
> >
> > Is there a reason you bumped this?
>
>
> ferfux is long gone. Why do you accuse everyone of
> being ferfux?

That's stupid.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Gerrymanderer2 ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:25PM

He needs an arch enemy. Ferfux was probably that person. Its an obsession. He is in denial. I guess thats how he deals with the loss.

If Alias ever stopped coming here he would just lose it.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alex Jones' Infowars ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:26PM

Duck Hunt Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when
> you're part of the team!

Nice Obama socialist indoctrination jingle!

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Gerrymanderer2 ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:26PM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Duck Hunt Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when
> > you're part of the team!
>
>
>
>
>
> ferfux,
>
> Is there a reason you bumped this?


Look at this poor guy. Its like he's searching the interwebs for a long lost companion. Hoping if he makes enough of a foot print calling for ferfux, one day ferfux will make another appearance.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:27PM

LOL This is like small kids throwing rocks at a low-flying aircraft.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: nofux ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:28PM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> lollollol Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > ferfux is long gone. Why do you accuse everyone
> of
> > being ferfux?
>
>
>
>
> He/you/it, is still here.


And by god your gonna find him Mcgruff even if its the last thing you do!

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Gerrymanderer2 ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:31PM

Someone close to Eesh needs to bring him to accept the fact that ferfux is gone forever.
Attachments:
you-are-involuntarily-bumped-from-your-flight-the1.jpg

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Paducah ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:36PM

Gerrymanderer2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Someone close to Eesh needs to bring him to accept
> the fact that ferfux is gone forever.


+1

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Gerrymanderer2 ()
Date: March 02, 2014 07:38PM

If I try to he'll accuse me of being ferfux and we'll be back at square one lol. It needs to be someone he trusts.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: i volunteer? ()
Date: March 02, 2014 08:39PM

Amir Mahlkmalbaf Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hello,
>
> I am a local filmmaker and have been an occasional
> poster/longtime lurker on this forum. I have
> produced, written and directed several short films
> and have been thinking about making a documentary
> about Fairfax Underground and its posters for some
> time now. This would be incredibly fertile
> territory for an Errol Morris-style investigative,
> quirky documentary about the lives of normal
> people involved in unusual circumstances. The
> years-long feuds, grudges, and alleged stalking
> and vandalism alone would be compelling material
> to document. If any longtime posters would be
> willing to conduct on-camera interviews, this
> would be ideal. We will delve deep into the secret
> lives of seemingly normal Fairfaxians who lead
> double lives as troublemakers, trolls, and
> outrageous characters online, and how these secret
> lives (and sometimes real lives) intersect.
>
> We will be in pre-production for the next few
> months; this message is simply meant to send out a
> feeler, to gauge interest. I will check back soon
> and if the response is positive will post my
> contact information forthwith.
>
> Sincerely,
> Amir Mahlkmalbaf


I volunteer to take the lead role.

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: GerryPanderer2 ()
Date: March 02, 2014 09:30PM

Gerrymanderer2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> He needs an arch enemy. Ferfux was probably that
> person. Its an obsession. He is in denial. I guess
> thats how he deals with the loss.
>
> If Alias ever stopped coming here he would just
> lose it.

And it is so much easier to just replace the Jews as his arch enemy, right?

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Re: Fairfax Underground Documentary
Posted by: Alias ()
Date: March 03, 2014 06:11AM

Gerrymanderer2 Wrote:
------------------------------------------------------
>
> If Alias ever stopped coming here he would just
> lose it.


He loves hating me.

It's odd, really. At first, we got along, and then, out of the blue, he said, fuck you. It was like he flipped a switch.

Very strange.

My theory is that his initial kindness was an act.

And, I think there's been more than one act.

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