Hey guys,

I have a court date coming up on Monday, and I'm looking forward to a nice summer vacation right in Fairfax City. I won't go into great detail into what its regarding, but I've been charged with a non-violent felony (actually it depends on how you look at it.. it's traffic related, and no, not a DUI/DWI..) which we're hoping can possibly be reduced in exchange for serving a few months+ in jail. Hopefully my vacation won't extend into August or else I'll miss my next semester at Tech.

I wanted to see if I could get some first hand advice from people here who've been to FFX County ADC as to what I can expect. Any information at all would be greatly appreciated. For example, the daily routines, whats on the menu, what most of the people are like, how bad it smells, etc.

This is going to be a life transforming experience for me hopefully.

Best Regards,
Springfield Resident

You DEFINITELY came to the right place to ask this question. Many criminals inhabit this board and should be able to answer any and all questions you have about jail, the court system, lawyers or criminal tendencies and livelihood with great accuracy.

STFU ub a loser!!! You can get PRC which is Pre Release Center. You get to go to work, wear street clothes, and have contact visits w/out your friends being searched thoroughly. Don't get any ideas about sneaking shit in, because it is a serious felony! As far of the rest of the jail, the sherrifs are dicks, you only get one hour of gym rec. a week and no library cart. I heard the head sherrif made a lot of budget cuts at the inmates expense. It's cold as fuck, and you want to know about the menu???? You gave got to be kidding.If you're a vegetarian they give u this ball of shit that has a bunch of crap inside it. It made Malvo (DCsniper) sick and go on a hunger strike, rather than eat that crap. It's not the Ritz by any means.U get one hot a day and shitty bagged bologna sandwiches twice a day I think. Pray and request via your lawyer to be placed in PRC, because you get to eat outside food, and otherwise u will be fighting off hordes of MS fuckers. They attack in groups just to let u know, and some of them don't sport tattoos now so as to not be identified. Good luck!!!


P.s. U live in POD areas w/ an enclosed deputy station in case of a riot!

Pray for PRC, because otherwise it sucks!!!
ub Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You DEFINITELY came to the right place to ask this
> question. Many criminals inhabit this board and
> should be able to answer any and all questions you
> have about jail, the court system, lawyers or
> criminal tendencies and livelihood with great
> accuracy.

welcome my brother....we're going to have a grand ol time....:-)

You're an idiot for asking a question like that on a website like this. You deserve to go to jail.

It aint that bad. You get used to the smell. Combindation of feet, ass, and clorox.

Cheese and bologna sammiches aint that bad either. If you are doing extended time, you will be in a pod like the other poster said - handful of cells with a common area.

Best advice - keep your eyes and ears open, and your mouth shut. Dont argue with the brown shirts, ride your time, and get the fuck out.

If you get hassled, just get a friend to smuggle you in some skittles. You can use them as lipstick and blush, and suck dick to keep other inmates from beating you senseless.

Sometimes its better to be a bitch than be beaten....

Former FFXADC resident Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It aint that bad. You get used to the smell.
> Combindation of feet, ass, and clorox.
>
> Cheese and bologna sammiches aint that bad either.
> If you are doing extended time, you will be in a
> pod like the other poster said - handful of cells
> with a common area.
>
> Best advice - keep your eyes and ears open, and
> your mouth shut. Dont argue with the brown
> shirts, ride your time, and get the fuck out.
>
> If you get hassled, just get a friend to smuggle
> you in some skittles. You can use them as
> lipstick and blush, and suck dick to keep other
> inmates from beating you senseless.
>
> Sometimes its better to be a bitch than be
> beaten....

You're being sarcastic right? Do you think if I seriously mind my own business I will get hassled? I'm a nice kid and I'd get along with just about anyone. I thought I heard from somewhere county jail is nothing compared to state prisons? For the record, I'm not the typical person you'd expect to be in a jail.. so I don't think I'll be having any problems with other inmates.


ub_a_loser Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> STFU ub a loser!!! You can get PRC which is Pre
> Release Center. You get to go to work, wear street
> clothes, and have contact visits w/out your
> friends being searched thoroughly. Don't get any
> ideas about sneaking shit in, because it is a
> serious felony! As far of the rest of the jail,
> the sherrifs are dicks, you only get one hour of
> gym rec. a week and no library cart. I heard the
> head sherrif made a lot of budget cuts at the
> inmates expense. It's cold as fuck, and you want
> to know about the menu???? You gave got to be
> kidding.If you're a vegetarian they give u this
> ball of shit that has a bunch of crap inside it.
> It made Malvo (DCsniper) sick and go on a hunger
> strike, rather than eat that crap. It's not the
> Ritz by any means.U get one hot a day and shitty
> bagged bologna sandwiches twice a day I think.
> Pray and request via your lawyer to be placed in
> PRC, because you get to eat outside food, and
> otherwise u will be fighting off hordes of MS
> fuckers. They attack in groups just to let u know,
> and some of them don't sport tattoos now so as to
> not be identified. Good luck!!!
>
>
> P.s. U live in POD areas w/ an enclosed deputy
> station in case of a riot!
>
> Pray for PRC, because otherwise it sucks!!!
> ub Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > You DEFINITELY came to the right place to ask
> this
> > question. Many criminals inhabit this board
> and
> > should be able to answer any and all questions
> you
> > have about jail, the court system, lawyers or
> > criminal tendencies and livelihood with great
> > accuracy.

I'll hope for it.. Balogne sandwiches..? Dang. Very discouraging news, but nothing unexpected. What do you mean no library cart? I'm hoping to kill a solid amount of time reading some books (maybe even the bible).

State is where the problems start. You got feds coming back into the state system and staties that have been there for 5 years and haven't had sex w/ a female in 5 yrs. If your county don't worry about getting cornholed, but count on possibly getting into a fight, especially at meal time. stay the fuck out of people's way (I suggest a good 2 foot space when getting food or lining up for other shit). Don't get into other people's conversations, I'm serious. County kids won't give a fuck but if you get in the conversation of a statie, oldie, or fed coming back through, they fight first ask questions later w/ no warning. I've been in county and regional joints, and they even had shanks in county. If, youre latin be tight w/ the latins. If youre black, bet on black. if your white...hold on tight! JK, you can be friends w/ whoever, but remember, if shit goes down, blacks back blacks and vice versa w/ every race in jail, regardless of who is friends w/ who. There might be a gay guy or 2. My advice to you is dont talk to them or even look at them. There are people in there who are used to identifying weaknesses and angles in order to later extort or have your ass beat because they make up some b.s. story for no reason, or because you won't give them your personal shit. it's fucking Darwinism to the fullest in their, so watch ypour back and be smart about shit. Also don't make small talk w/ or befriend guards, haters will use it against you, not to mention it makes u look like a kiss ass narc. GOOD LUCK homey!!!

Yo i never did time in Fairfax, but i been to the joint in Arlington. The unit i was in was basickly for inmate workfoce we got alot of slack cuz we worked. there was few fights and sometimes some of the other inmates acted stupid and we will all get locked down for one person's stupidity. i was cellmate with a dude who was in Fairfax and he says its alot more tougher there than in arlington and in alexandria.
Just find something to occupy your time with, if its being on work detail, or reading, or just learning something new. poeple in my unit use to fight over TV cuz they have english and spanish and there were sometimes fights about who would watch what. basicly keep to your self and dont try to act hard or smarter cause it will be trouble.

This thread has loser writen all over it.
Where's Inkahootz when you need him?

The only real loser on this site is you, 496, or whatever your name is.EJ and Meade are head cases. What's your excuse???

this board is about window tinting and illegal immigration. take you query somewhere else.

easy there Inka...don't want to be violating that parole.

Anonymous Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Former FFXADC resident Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > It aint that bad. You get used to the smell.
> > Combindation of feet, ass, and clorox.
> >
> > Cheese and bologna sammiches aint that bad
> either.
> > If you are doing extended time, you will be in
> a
> > pod like the other poster said - handful of
> cells
> > with a common area.
> >
> > Best advice - keep your eyes and ears open, and
> > your mouth shut. Dont argue with the brown
> > shirts, ride your time, and get the fuck out.
> >
> > If you get hassled, just get a friend to
> smuggle
> > you in some skittles. You can use them as
> > lipstick and blush, and suck dick to keep other
> > inmates from beating you senseless.
> >
> > Sometimes its better to be a bitch than be
> > beaten....
>
> You're being sarcastic right? Do you think if I
> seriously mind my own business I will get hassled?
> I'm a nice kid and I'd get along with just about
> anyone. I thought I heard from somewhere county
> jail is nothing compared to state prisons? For
> the record, I'm not the typical person you'd
> expect to be in a jail.. so I don't think I'll be
> having any problems with other inmates.
>
>
You're a "nice kid." You've got "punk" written all over you. I suggest the following....See a proctologist before you report for jail. He can possibly recommend some exercises for your anal canal and spinchter - you're going to need it because as from what I have been told, 9 inches in the rectum is not pleasant the first time.

Buy some baby wipes. They work well on cleaning up urine, blood, semen, and feces.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 05/14/2008 09:16AM by ITRADE.

Alright now that was just a little retarded iTrade. I'm a nice kid but I won't take crap from anyone. 6'0, nearly 180, in shape. I think I'll be able to hold my ground if things ever get rough in there. I'm going to play it cautiously in there obviously as Joey suggested and hopefully I won't be in the middle of any shit.

6 foot 180 pd? You are just a tall and skinny/lanky kid! Try putting another 30 to 40 and then you'll be alright in there. Start bulking up and working out ASAP!!!


Anonymous Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alright now that was just a little retarded
> iTrade. I'm a nice kid but I won't take crap from
> anyone. 6'0, nearly 180, in shape. I think I'll
> be able to hold my ground if things ever get rough
> in there. I'm going to play it cautiously in
> there obviously as Joey suggested and hopefully I
> won't be in the middle of any shit.

Death By Cop takes it in the ass.

. "6'0, nearly 180, in shape."

You think your in shape, lol
I think what you meant by in shape, is; skinny nerd, with no muscles.

acidbyt3 also takes it in the ass.

Brit Brit = 496 = homo in denial, because he just can't stop w/ the gay references!!!! Shouldn't you be getting ready for your next S and M session w/ BEX????

Anonymous Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Alright now that was just a little retarded
> iTrade. I'm a nice kid but I won't take crap from
> anyone. 6'0, nearly 180, in shape. I think I'll
> be able to hold my ground if things ever get rough
> in there. I'm going to play it cautiously in
> there obviously as Joey suggested and hopefully I
> won't be in the middle of any shit.

You're just the type they like - tall, submissive and white....

ITRADE Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Anonymous Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Alright now that was just a little retarded
> > iTrade. I'm a nice kid but I won't take crap
> from
> > anyone. 6'0, nearly 180, in shape. I think
> I'll
> > be able to hold my ground if things ever get
> rough
> > in there. I'm going to play it cautiously in
> > there obviously as Joey suggested and hopefully
> I
> > won't be in the middle of any shit.
>
> You're just the type they like - tall, submissive
> and white....


Submissive? Sounds like 496' type!!!!!

Ask your lawyer to plead you to PRC. You can find a job and leave 6 days a week for work, after you complete some basic classes (takes about a month). You get randomly visited and drug tested daily. The sheriff's office charges you for everything - so don't expect to keep most of the money you earn. Its mostly a chance to "escape" from the place and get some outside food and contact. There have been lots of budget cuts and many deputies have resigned recently. Lunch is 2 bologna sandwiches - every day. None of the food is real - fake eggs, fake cheese, fake meat, etc. and not enough of it. On Saturday, you can buy a $4 cheeseburger. Guys in the ADC part of the jail fight for the food. This joint has the worst reputation, from an inmate's viewpoint, in the region.

Do you prefer jelly or syrup?

ok honestly DONT EVER DRESS UP TO COURT. doesnt work anymore. i always wore white sweatshirt and white sweats with white underwear. you can only wear white in adc...so dress comfy to court...cuz thats what your going to wear in jail...

Brit Brit Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Do you prefer jelly or syrup?


496 closet homo alert!!!!

Death By Cop is in the closet now, he's in the closet tooooo....you R Kelly chasing see saw.

Brit Brit Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Death By Cop is in the closet now, he's in the
> closet tooooo....you R Kelly chasing see saw.


Deranged and nonsensical also, 496/Brit???

Free and anonymous is more like it, fag boy.

acidbyt3 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> . "6'0, nearly 180, in shape."
>
> You think your in shape, lol
> I think what you meant by in shape, is; skinny
> nerd, with no muscles.

When you can rep 85 lb dumbbells 3x8 get back to me. Or front squat 170lb 3x10. I'm very sorry that that some of the regulars here are overweight/out of shape (and actually think it's normal), but honestly that's not my problem. 6'0 and 180 I wouldn't consider being skinny.

Also regarding the PRC, thanks again for the info. I'm sure my lawyer is aware of it and I'll chat with him about it. I'm just a little worried they won't be feeding me enough food.. especially if I decide to exercise in there.. which I can't imagine not doing after running/lifting at least 3x a week now for the past 2 years. Apparently I get an account which I or someone else can fill with money which I can use to purchase snacks? Thanks.

Apparently I
> get an account which I or someone else can fill
> with money which I can use to purchase snacks?
> Thanks.

Yes, someone has to leave a money order or a cashier's check made out to you (with your ID # on it) in the safe on the left in the lobby. Make sure they have their name and address on the CC or MO.

Just have them drop the CC or MO in the safe on the left, and tell them NOT to put it in an envelope, because that could delay your funds. Remember, they charge you $1.00 a day to house you and that money comes out of your account.

For future reference, since you like to get arrested, if you are ever in a legal situation on the Mexican Guatamalan border, go with the Guatamalins, their jails are nicer, and their legal system is more restrictive with judges. Stay out of Chile; their judges wear hoods over their heads and most of their jails are all like 12,000 feet above sea level.

Canadia and Monnaco jails are like the best in the world. French jails are surprisingly uglier and dirtier than German jails.

FUNdamental Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Apparently I
> > get an account which I or someone else can fill
> > with money which I can use to purchase snacks?
> > Thanks.
>
> Yes, someone has to leave a money order or a
> cashier's check made out to you (with your ID # on
> it) in the safe on the left in the lobby. Make
> sure they have their name and address on the CC or
> MO.
>
> Just have them drop the CC or MO in the safe on
> the left, and tell them NOT to put it in an
> envelope, because that could delay your funds.
> Remember, they charge you $1.00 a day to house you
> and that money comes out of your account.
>
> For future reference, since you like to get
> arrested, if you are ever in a legal situation on
> the Mexican Guatamalan border, go with the
> Guatamalins, their jails are nicer, and their
> legal system is more restrictive with judges.
> Stay out of Chile; their judges wear hoods over
> their heads and most of their jails are all like
> 12,000 feet above sea level.
>
> Canadia and Monnaco jails are like the best in the
> world. French jails are surprisingly uglier and
> dirtier than German jails.


You ,apparently, seem to know alot about jails as well. From experience??

Goth Chick

closet homo

http://www.ifc.com/static/sections/kelly/trapped.html

Remember, Bermuda now puts deadbeat dads in prison This system makes Bermuda the highest per captita incarseration country in the world.

Here is on for you...
Liam John Ashley was a 17 year old from Nnorth Shores , NZ. His parents, Ian and Lorraine Ashley, pressed criminal charges against the son after the boy used the mother's car without the family's permission; the family denied bail in order for the son to be sent to prison as a way to correct the boy's behaviour and prevent additional "minor misdemeanours. His parents believed that, after Ashley experienced "minor trouble" with New Zealand laws, the prison system would be the safest place for Ashley.

The prison authorities placed Ashley in one of four compartments of a prison van operated by Chubb Security, a company operating under a contract with the New Zealand officials, scheduled to transport the prisoners from North Shore District Court to Auckland Central Remand Prison at Mt Eden. Ashley shared the compartment with two other men, including George Baker who had the classification of a dangerous criminal. Baker attacked Ashley, strangling and stomping on the boy. The victim sustained brain injuries and the family chose to remove Ashley from life support at 10:30 on the following day; Ashley died at 10:45 on 25 August. Baker said that he attacked Ashley because he believed the boy was a "nark."

Those people are some retarded parents. They should have died, not the kid.

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/local/daily/april99/supermax18.htm