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How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: dika-dika ()
Date: April 04, 2011 05:56PM

They been hanging on my roof on and off for a couple of weeks. They look just like this and they some big ass birds. I have no idea what they could be eating.

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A wind came from the wilderness and it carried me where a man could never reach alone
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vulture.jpg

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: More Complete ()
Date: April 04, 2011 05:58PM

BB Gun should do it. Hurry before they make a nest!

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: munch munch ()
Date: April 04, 2011 06:00PM

They eat dead meat - you want to KEEP your dead meat around?

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: More Complete ()
Date: April 04, 2011 06:02PM

BB Gun won't kill them, just piss them off enough for them to leave.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gonads & Strife ()
Date: April 04, 2011 06:15PM



----------------------------------------------------

Who is Gonads & Strife?
Outing on FFU: I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all Robert Paulson...or Eesh...or Eli...

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: 6X ()
Date: April 04, 2011 06:15PM

get some cats.
Attachments:
cat_vs_vulture-1600x1200.jpg

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Atom ()
Date: April 04, 2011 06:56PM

Turkey Vultures are protected by federal law. You not only can't shoot them, you can't even shoo them.

Good luck and don't talk about harassing vultures on a public forum, you may get even more unwanted guest (like the police and fish and game agents.)

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: dika-dika ()
Date: April 04, 2011 07:30PM



I tryed shooing, they just sit up there and look at me. I know how this guy feel.

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A wind came from the wilderness and it carried me where a man could never reach alone

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: research ()
Date: April 04, 2011 08:26PM


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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: ThePackLeader ()
Date: April 04, 2011 08:29PM

We only had one vulture around here years ago, and it broke a freaking tree branch it was so big. I've never had a problem with them, but with other birds dumping on our cars from a tree, we used fireworks to scare them off. Use bottle rockets.

==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 04, 2011 08:39PM

are they like actually doing anything to you?

I mean, dont tell my yr just upset cause they are hanging around - that's kinda sad.

Yr a human - man up and deal with the fact you live on a planet with other creatures, y'know?

I mean, if you really want an annoying bird, I had an ex who's house had a woodpecker would bang on the aluminum siding all hours of the early morning - now THAT sucked.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Date: April 04, 2011 08:40PM

Rent a bald eagle.

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"...your suffering will be legendary even in Hell!"

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: jimmy james ()
Date: April 04, 2011 08:57PM

Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 04, 2011 08:39PM

are they like actually doing anything to you?

-no gordon, im sure they are not teasing or harrasing mr. dika-dika...most likely shitting all over the place, have you not seen the amount of feces these birds produce?

I mean, dont tell my yr just upset cause they are hanging around - that's kinda sad.

- i would not like those birds perched up all over my house...they are huge, disgusting, full of bacteria, ....makes your house look creepy.

Yr a human - man up and deal with the fact you live on a planet with other creatures, y'know?

-so if you have an infestation of cockroaches/skunks/termites/vultures...you wouldnt call pest control but just simply "man up" and let it be because "you live on a planet with other creatures, y'know"

I mean, if you really want an annoying bird, I had an ex who's house had a woodpecker would bang on the aluminum siding all hours of the early morning - now THAT sucked.

-thats a lie, you dont have an ex....you have never had a girlfriend.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Stones ()
Date: April 04, 2011 09:00PM

Don't leave your tampons in the front yard.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: justsayin ()
Date: April 04, 2011 09:11PM

Can't do the airgun method in this county until at least July, and even then you better be damn sure you are a good enough shot not to have the projectile leave your property.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: redd foxx ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:21AM

How about cleaning your filthy yard.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Ralph Pootawn ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:23AM

It's illegal to shoot a BB gun in fairfax...

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: ThePackLeader ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:27AM

Ralph Pootawn Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It's illegal to shoot a BB gun in fairfax...


That depends upon your property size, and set-up.

As for bottle rockets, they're illegal too, but at least no one really gives a damn about them (Unless you're harassing people 24/7).

==================================================================================================
"And if any women or children get their legs torn off, or faces caved in, well, it's tough shit for them." -2LT. Bert Stiles, 505th, 339th (On Berlin Bombardier Mission, 1944).

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:40AM

jimmy james Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
> Date: April 04, 2011 08:39PM
>
> are they like actually doing anything to you?
>
> -no gordon, im sure they are not teasing or
> harrasing mr. dika-dika...most likely shitting all
> over the place, have you not seen the amount of
> feces these birds produce?
>
> I mean, dont tell my yr just upset cause they are
> hanging around - that's kinda sad.
>
> - i would not like those birds perched up all over
> my house...they are huge, disgusting, full of
> bacteria, ....makes your house look creepy.
>
> Yr a human - man up and deal with the fact you
> live on a planet with other creatures, y'know?
>
> -so if you have an infestation of
> cockroaches/skunks/termites/vultures...you wouldnt
> call pest control but just simply "man up" and let
> it be because "you live on a planet with other
> creatures, y'know"
>
> I mean, if you really want an annoying bird, I had
> an ex who's house had a woodpecker would bang on
> the aluminum siding all hours of the early morning
> - now THAT sucked.
>
> -thats a lie, you dont have an ex....you have
> never had a girlfriend.

----------------------------------------------------------------

if you really have an issue is differentiating between common household pests and Nationally protected wildlife, then yeah, you have "the issues", m'man

he's got me on the whole girlfriend thing - he knows I lied about that cause he's the one I have to pay $2 for the use of his moms :)
Attachments:
your-mom-is-a-whore.jpg

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:47AM

@OP - wasnt trying to clown you on yr thread. I actually seriously wanted just to know what yr personal issue was with them, is all

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: not sure ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:47AM

dika-dika Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> They been hanging on my roof on and off for a
> couple of weeks. They look just like this and
> they some big ass birds. I have no idea what they
> could be eating.

We used a hose and some rocks to get rid of this hugeass pheasant lookin thing a few years back. The fuckin thing was wild, it would squawk and chirp at our windows and make huge swooping motions at us while we were trying to get into our car. It was scary. Not sure what it was, it had huge wings and red eyes and looked like some kind of stanky chicken. Eventually we got it real good with the hose and some gravel and the screechy fucker flew off.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: WingNut ()
Date: April 05, 2011 08:52AM

National Airport used to use shotguns with empty shells to get rid of geese.

I think a starter pistol or firecrackers could do the trick, the a garden hose could be all you need.

If they have nested around your home and have eggs or young, good luck, they will probably be more stubborn.

-----------------------------------
*** "Sometimes I joke....Sometimes I'm serious...Most times I'm BOTH".***

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: TheMeeper ()
Date: April 05, 2011 09:02AM

National airport uses loudspeakers that play predatory bird calls and explosions, you can hear it sometimes at Gravelly Point. Not sure that bird noises would scare off a vulture, but that bottle rocket idea would probably work.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: More Complete ()
Date: April 05, 2011 09:51AM

Ralph Pootawn Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It's illegal to shoot a BB gun in fairfax...


Never stopped me. ;)

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 05, 2011 09:51AM

do those fake owl that they use at shopping centers , would that maybe work?

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Date: April 05, 2011 09:53AM

They work for certain birds - the types that find owls to be competitors or predators.

My parents had some crows out in their house that were driving off the song birds. They used to have scrub jays, chickadees, etc. Once the crows appeared, the songbirds left. My parents acquired a CD of "hawk cries" and played it on an outside speaker.

The crows would become visibly agitated when they heard the hawk caws. They left after about 2 weeks.

-----------------------------------------------

"...your suffering will be legendary even in Hell!"



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 04/05/2011 09:54AM by Pinhead the Cenobite.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: 496 ()
Date: April 05, 2011 12:22PM

Quit roasting goats in your back yard.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: gagging gary the gay ()
Date: April 05, 2011 11:52PM

Threaten the birds in the most serious and vicious manner with hardcore anal rape...

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: ProVallone ()
Date: April 06, 2011 07:28AM

Tell them about the 30 dead cats in herndon.

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Priapus ()
Date: April 06, 2011 07:37AM

How big is their poo?

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: dika-dika ()
Date: April 06, 2011 06:30PM

Damn those two damn birds are back. I'm planning an executive action on them two in a couple of days.

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A wind came from the wilderness and it carried me where a man could never reach alone

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Fire-up the Back Yard Grill! ()
Date: April 06, 2011 06:44PM

Just shoot 'em dead, fire up the grill, and bon-apetite! Tastes just like their cousin the Turkey! Yum Yum!

And for anyone that doesn't know yet, this Bozo the Clown posting 'Gordon Blvd' has his FXunderground registered name as 'JoMamas Pimp' and also uses the 'screen name' 'More Complete', and for the look of most of his postings, he IS a complete Brain Dead Moron Chronic Substance Abuser that lives at The Lamb Center! (a low-life daytime homeless shelter found right off of FX Circle on Old Lee Highwy!)

Everyone should like totally IGNORE whatever USELESS shit he posts. Just 'move-on' to the next post. Total waste of your precious time!

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Re: How do you get rid of two turkey vultures hanging on your house in FFX
Posted by: Gordon Blvd ()
Date: April 06, 2011 07:21PM

my my my. Looks like someone needs a form to fill out...................
Attachments:
butthurt_report_form.jpg

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