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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: woodson alum 2 ()
Date: January 21, 2011 10:28PM

Wow, clearly NONE of you have any clue what it is like to be at WTW or what kind of man Jeff Yost is. There are plenty of opportunities given to the boys and girls at woodson to do well. Every child who goes there knows what the consequences are for drugs or weapons. No, I don't believe the punishments should be as severe as they are, but the students are fully aware of what will happen if they are caught. It is their JOB to follow the rules. As for Jeff Yost, he has a son, who is not 'too young for hs' considering he is currently enrolled in college. Jeff does his job, he is a very kind man who also goes out of his way to help students who genuinely come to him with issues. Nick's suicide is a horrible thing, and to know a young man hurt so much that he took his life, cannot be blamed on one man, who isn't the only one who makes the decision for expelling a student, nor can it be blamed on the school system alone. Clearly, nick had much more going on then anyone was aware of, and no one, but him knows why he did what he did. It is a complete and utter waste of time to sit here and try and place blame on someone or something, when no one knows, or will ever know, what was the true cause for the tragic incident. Instead, take your time and use it to construct activities and programs that steer away from this, and do your best to reform policies you don't agree with. Rest in Peace Nick.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FHS mom x2 ()
Date: January 21, 2011 10:37PM

@ Girl: "And I don't believe that a single act like that can make someone commit suicide. I think a person has to really be mentally unhealthy to do something like that.

Are you kidding!?! Are you 12??? Do you think that young man in college that jumped off the bridge after his personal life was broadcast all over the internet had mental issues BEFORE that happened?! It certainly hasn't been reported as such.

Really.

Events.... intense, life-altering events can AND DO cause drastic reactions. Drastic to the point of chosing to end life as one knows it. And kids this age don't have the maturity and reasoning of fore-sight. They don't have the ability (most, any way) to really wrap thier minds around the situation and look far enough down the road to see they CAN get through it, CAN get around it and life WILL go on, and WILL be good....they do NOT believe they can ever put something like this behind them.

Not saying I have any insight at all to Nick's reasons. I didn't even know the young man,but I DO know that the humiliation, the shame, the loss of all support... yes, that will have a profound effect on a person - especially a teen ager. Especially a teenager ALREADY dealing with a gravely ill parent.

Especially a boy and his mom.

God bless this family in thier grief.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Bob2011 ()
Date: January 21, 2011 10:48PM

Come on people. A dad and mom lost their son for whatever reason. A reason we will never know. If you have kids hug them now, love them, be there for them. I am not saying this did not happen in their home, but with a mom with ALS, and a dad trying to cope with this while raising a son.... My thoughts and prayers go out to the family. Yes kids make mistakes - one strike and out has got to go.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FHS mom x2 ()
Date: January 21, 2011 10:55PM

Thank you, Bob2011.

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: Whocares what mynameis ()
Date: January 21, 2011 11:08PM

Suicide. Wasnt the first attempt either. Says the police report

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Girl ()
Date: January 21, 2011 11:23PM

woodson alum 2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Wow, clearly NONE of you have any clue what it is
> like to be at WTW or what kind of man Jeff Yost
> is. There are plenty of opportunities given to the
> boys and girls at woodson to do well. Every child
> who goes there knows what the consequences are for
> drugs or weapons. No, I don't believe the
> punishments should be as severe as they are, but
> the students are fully aware of what will happen
> if they are caught. It is their JOB to follow the
> rules. As for Jeff Yost, he has a son, who is not
> 'too young for hs' considering he is currently
> enrolled in college. Jeff does his job, he is a
> very kind man who also goes out of his way to help
> students who genuinely come to him with issues.
> Nick's suicide is a horrible thing, and to know a
> young man hurt so much that he took his life,
> cannot be blamed on one man, who isn't the only
> one who makes the decision for expelling a
> student, nor can it be blamed on the school system
> alone. Clearly, nick had much more going on then
> anyone was aware of, and no one, but him knows why
> he did what he did. It is a complete and utter
> waste of time to sit here and try and place blame
> on someone or something, when no one knows, or
> will ever know, what was the true cause for the
> tragic incident. Instead, take your time and use
> it to construct activities and programs that steer
> away from this, and do your best to reform
> policies you don't agree with. Rest in Peace Nick.


I currently go to Woodson. Mr. Yost does have a younger son, I didn't know he had an older one too.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Girl ()
Date: January 21, 2011 11:26PM

FHS mom x2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> @ Girl: "And I don't believe that a single act
> like that can make someone commit suicide. I think
> a person has to really be mentally unhealthy to do
> something like that.
>
> Are you kidding!?! Are you 12??? Do you think
> that young man in college that jumped off the
> bridge after his personal life was broadcast all
> over the internet had mental issues BEFORE that
> happened?! It certainly hasn't been reported as
> such.
>
> Really.
>
> Events.... intense, life-altering events can AND
> DO cause drastic reactions. Drastic to the point
> of chosing to end life as one knows it. And kids
> this age don't have the maturity and reasoning of
> fore-sight. They don't have the ability (most,
> any way) to really wrap thier minds around the
> situation and look far enough down the road to see
> they CAN get through it, CAN get around it and
> life WILL go on, and WILL be good....they do NOT
> believe they can ever put something like this
> behind them.
>
> Not saying I have any insight at all to Nick's
> reasons. I didn't even know the young man,but I DO
> know that the humiliation, the shame, the loss of
> all support... yes, that will have a profound
> effect on a person - especially a teen ager.
> Especially a teenager ALREADY dealing with a
> gravely ill parent.
>
> Especially a boy and his mom.
>
> God bless this family in thier grief.

I phrased what I wanted to say incorrectly. All I mean is that I don't think a single event- at least not one like getting expelled from school- can make a person commit suicide unless they already have emotional problems. I made my point badly, but my point is that I don't think it's fair to soley blame the FCPS administration for Nick's suicide.

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: Woodson mom ()
Date: January 21, 2011 11:35PM

The fact is that what Nick was suffering had to do with everything that had been going on. He was a child with promise and a future which he could not see. Why, only he would be able to answer. We need to do something about this system that obviously is not working. As for Mr Yost he was doing what he has to do. I dont believe he wanted to do any harm to any of the children that are being shuffled around. Lets find a way to change this problem so Mr Yost can do what is needed to protect all the children.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 21, 2011 11:50PM

How many kids does FCPS have to kill before we parents do something to make FCPS stop?

I'm sick of the child hating monsters who run the system: Grattan and Scanlan.

Woodson Mom -

do you know that principals daily violate the SRR by interrogating students regarding disciplinary matters before contacting parents. A direct and blatant violation for which none has ever been disciplined. SROs (cops in the schools) daily interrogate students/suspects regarding criminal matters without giving them their Miranda warnings.

do you know the principals call the appeals office before they impose punishment. Thus the appeals office really is imposing the punishment they will later review on appeal.

That appeals are denied almost 100% of the time.

That the appeals hearing mostly consists of the hearing officer berating and denigrating the student.

You platitudes would be enraging if they did not demonstrate your total cluelessness.

Woodson parent x2

If only you could see how arrogant, condescending, cruel and heartless your post is.

It is all Yost's Grattan's, Scanlan's and Dale's fault. They are the adults and they made the choice to treat this boy this way. Over what? Guns, knives, bombs? No pot.

but mostly its the fault of Tessie Wilson, Stuart Gibson and the other members of the School Board who insist on a "fry'em all" discipline system.

And it's your fault for rationalizing this sick, twisted system.

Girl

even in a "system", Jeff Yost had a choice and the choice he made led to this suicide. Apparently Yost targets boys. Many parents who only have girls can be very judgmental and harsh toward boys. Yost's boy will never suffer Nick's fate 'cause he can go to Dad's school where no one will hold young Yost accountable for anything for fear of alienating their boss, Daddy Yost.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 01/21/2011 11:53PM by Thomas More.

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:00AM

Woodson mom Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The fact is that what Nick was suffering had to do with everything that had been going on. He was a child with promise and a future which he could not
see. Why, only he would be able to answer. We need to do something about this system that obviously is not working. As for Mr Yost he was doing what he has to do. I dont believe he wanted to do any harm to any of the children that are being shuffled around. Lets find a way to change this problem so Mr Yost can do what is needed to protect all the children.<

Lets start by finding Mr.Yost employment where he can stop targeting boys for destruction. Yost had choices. He appears to take every opportunity he has to harm boys.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: woodson alum 2 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:00AM

Thomas, Yost's son doesn't go to woodson, his 'daddys school', he isn't protected by anything. Get your facts straight next time. Your anger towards fcps isn't going to bring back nick, or save any child currently upset over any decisions fcps has made. Shut up, and do something.. other then your mindless banter here.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:12AM

woodson alum 2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Thomas, Yost's son doesn't go to woodson, his 'daddys school', he isn't protected by anything. Get your facts straight next time. Your anger towards fcps isn't going to bring back nick, or save any child currently upset over any decisions fcps has made. Shut up, and do something.. other then your mindless banter here.<

It's neither mindless nor banter.

Regardless where's Yost's boy is, he will not be subject to the same rules that Nick and Josh suffered under: FCPS employees protect their own. And Jeff always has the choice (that word again) to bring the younger Yost to whatever school Jeff finds himself at. Go pick nits someplace else.

Oh, I'm already doing something. Check your own facts. Timmy Arrington, the assistant principal at south Lakes who hounded Josh to death is gone. Gibson who championed this "fry'em all" policy is leaving. So's Wilson.

What are you doing about it, mouth?



Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 01/22/2011 12:15AM by Thomas More.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: steve k2 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:32AM

You have to remove kids with drugs on school ground. Why let a problem like that spread and risk the spread of illegal drugs in the school system.

FCPS discipline policy is very fair, and all the guidelines are clearly spelled out and signed by all parents in the SR&R book. Parent your kids, if mine ever did drugs in school, I would send them to military school myself. The county has excellent alternative schools, but to insuate that kids using illegal drugs in school deserve a second shot with that school is absurd.

Teach your kids right from wrong people/

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:44AM

steve k2 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> You have to remove kids with drugs on school ground. Why let a problem like that spread and risk the spread of illegal drugs in the school system.<

FCPS discipline policy is very fair, and all the guidelines are clearly spelled out and signed by all parents in the SR&R book. Parent your kids, if mine ever did drugs in school, I would send them to military school myself. The county has excellent alternative schools, but to insuate that kids using illegal drugs in school deserve a second shot with that school is absurd.

Teach your kids right from wrong people/<

Another neanderthal heard from. Back under your bridge, troll.

It's pot for pity sake. Not crack. Not heroin. Not guns. Not bombs.

A birth control pill gets the same treatment as a bomb.

A grandfathers penknife is treated like a machete.

"Lets destroy every other kids life so there will less competition for my kid to go to UVA!"

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: ???? ()
Date: January 22, 2011 08:15AM

Every year, every child that attends a Fairfax County Public School signs and therefore agrees to the rules placed on them. These rules outline the punishments for bullying, drug use, drug dealing, bringing weapons to school, any many other things. If you all are so strongly opposed to this system, you do not have to sign this paper and you can happily send your child to a private school.
However, every student attending a Fairfax County Public School has agreed to these rules and therefore has no right to complain about them after they have violated one.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Friend ()
Date: January 22, 2011 08:24AM

r. Nicholas L. "Nick" Stuban, age 15, of Fairfax, VA, passed away on January 20, 2011. Beloved son of Steven M.F. and Sandra L. (nee Lesher)Stuban. Loving grandson of Robert M and Lois M. Lesher and Frank F. and Helene Stuban. Cherished nephew of Thomas and Susan Monk, Christo and Lydia Antoniou, Mario and Teresa Accardo and Tony and Sheila Shaw. Adored cousin of Lydia, Paul, Bridget, Patrick and Peter Monk, Christine and Suzanne Antoniou, Sara and Robert Rathgeber and Daniel and Bryan Paul. Nick was a student at Woodson High School. The family will receive friends on Monday, January 24, 2011 from 6 until 7 PM at the Bethlehem Lutheran Church, 8922 Little River Turnpike, Fairfax, VA 22031. A Celebration of Nick's Life will follow. His interment will be at a later date in Arlington National Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations in Nick's memory to any organization dealing with Teen Depression and Suicide Prevention.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Friend ()
Date: January 22, 2011 08:24AM

Mr. Nicholas L. "Nick" Stuban, age 15, of Fairfax, VA, passed away on January 20, 2011. Beloved son of Steven M.F. and Sandra L. (nee Lesher)Stuban. Loving grandson of Robert M and Lois M. Lesher and Frank F. and Helene Stuban. Cherished nephew of Thomas and Susan Monk, Christo and Lydia Antoniou, Mario and Teresa Accardo and Tony and Sheila Shaw. Adored cousin of Lydia, Paul, Bridget, Patrick and Peter Monk, Christine and Suzanne Antoniou, Sara and Robert Rathgeber and Daniel and Bryan Paul. Nick was a student at Woodson High School. The family will receive friends on Monday, January 24, 2011 from 6 until 7 PM at the Bethlehem Lutheran Church, 8922 Little River Turnpike, Fairfax, VA 22031. A Celebration of Nick's Life will follow. His interment will be at a later date in Arlington National Cemetery. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations in Nick's memory to any organization dealing with Teen Depression and Suicide Prevention.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: I blame FCPS ()
Date: January 22, 2011 08:42AM

First I want to tell the Stuban family how sorry I am for the loss of their son. I cannot fathom the pain they are in.

I find it is the fault of FCPS and the SB for Nick's death. This was only pot. Not a gun, not crack, not the beating of another child. Shame on the school system for the one strike out rule. Each child deserves a second chance.

I hope we can all see that kids take things to heart and cannot see sometimes a better future. They are just kids.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: a parent who does not love FCPS ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:00AM

I am not a fan of FCPS.

This is a very sad situation. However, FCPS is not at fault. The family is not at fault.

I don't know the details, except that a very sad young man took his own life. I do know that these situations are seldom caused by one factor.

Kids have been expelled from schools for years without committing suicide. Kids have had sad situations at home without committing suicide.

There are kids in wonderful, happy homes with lots of friends who shock them by committing suicide.

FCPS may need to re-look at their policy, but it is not to blame for this suicide. I don't think this policy was created out of meanness--but to protect all of our children. Believe it or not, people, there are drug dealers out there who want to harm your child. The policy probably results from the fact that, in the past, that some children were treated differently from others. I assume the policy was put into effect to ensure that the wealthier families could not influence the schools. I think part of the reason that the kids are sent to other schools is to give them an opportunity for a fresh start-away from possible bad influences, as well as to send a message.

I personally know of several kids who were expelled over the last few years and sent to other schools who are doing great now. Others are not. I don't know the answer as to why some move on and others don't.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TruthBeTold ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:18AM

Anyone who thinks the SR&R is any kind of agreement is absolutely WRONG and needs to be educated. (One school board member keeps calling it a contract, which is a lie, and tells you a great deal about the way he treats kids in appeals.) Here is the history of this absurd document.

In 1995, in response to the 1994 Gun-Free Schools Act, the Fairfax County School Board published the Fairfax County Public Schools Rules of Conduct. It required that parents/guardians and students sign the following statement:

“I have read and acknowledge the attached Rules of Conduct and recognize my parental responsibility to assist the school in disciplining my child and maintaining order, and acknowledge that failure to do so could result in court action against my child and me.â€

It also provided for a $50 fine if parents didn’t sign it.

The governing Code of Virginia, signed into law by Governor George Allen (R) in May 1995, also stated that parents could be fined up to $500 if they failed to participate in programs that improve a student’s behavior.

Needless to say, there was a hue and cry over these violations of rights. The Rutherford Institute, a civil rights advocacy group based in Charlottesville, VA, filed a suit in federal court, stating that discipline is a parental matter. The ACLU was prepared to file a class-action-type lawsuit based on free-speech grounds. By the end of 1995, William Hurd, then-Virginia deputy attorney general, told superintendents that the most a school can do is ask parents to sign that they had RECEIVED the rules. The ACLU also got the state to make sure the following statement is in all the codes of conduct:

“By signing the statement of receipt, parents or guardians shall not be deemed to waive, but too expressly reserve, their rights protected by the constitution or laws of the United States or the Commonwealth of Virginia, and the parent or guardian shall have the right to express disagreement with a school’s or school division’s policies or decisions.â€

But since then, Fairfax County’s Student Responsibilities and Rights document has grown from a six-pager to a 60+-page treatise littered with innumerable Code of Virginia citations. It is nearly impossible to read, and certainly you have not even “received†the entire document when you'd also have to get the education code along with it.

More important, the policies and procedures written down by Fairfax County have no connection to the way these policies are actually carried out, child by child.

Student “rights†barely exist in the SR&R, and “responsibilities†go far beyond anything required of ordinary American citizens and standard jurisprudence. Due process is regularly violated by FCPS in its "judicial review" of discipline infractions (kids interrogated and coerced into signing statements without being told they can remain silent and without parental knowledge, etc.) Parents, who may be expected to review, understand, and discuss this with their kids mostly don’t (it is way too long and complex and FCPS makes them believe it is a benign and perfect dictator). Many can’t (language issues and and all those code citations).

Those who read it through are often shocked. Those who aren’t shocked have never had a kid caught in the stocks.

There are some Gestapo Javers who keep posting on FairfaxUnderground who believe unquestioningly in the rod. God and Jesus help them if their children are ever caught in the nightmare they perpetuate.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: shocked ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:23AM

This is amazing!

A post about a high school kid who killed himself, and there's no reference to Fisting, facebook pick, people being pricks, friends of the recently departed complaining about the hate on this "Blog", people on this "blog" pointing out that it's a messageboard, and not a blog, more references to fisting, people asking where the funeral is.

Sadly, the people bashing fcps have taken over the thread from the usual bastards who frequent this site.

Let's take back FU!

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Dadof4 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:35AM

It's time for someone to take a deep look at WTWHS and "throw them out" Yost. The boys all have targets on their backs yet the girls break the dress code every day with NO enforcement. In the summer they look like whores. The ratio of expulsion between boys and girls should be analyzed. Also look at the ratio of all disciplinary action between the sexes. I hear horror stories about how boys are treated there. Thank God for LBHS.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Woodson Alum78 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:44AM

I knew Nick Stuban briefly, Coached him last spring. He was always a very polite young man. While the rest of the team was goofing off in the locker room before practice or games, Nick would sit on the bench with his head in a text book studying. I was never aware that Nick was battling depresssion as I was with several other players. The only way I knew of the others was due to the Parents sharing this information with me. Had I known, perhaps I could have been that positive role model for him, helped him steer away just a bit from this path. But as a Coach, that sort of information is not shared with us despite the fact that Coaches spend 3 times as much time with a student during the day as any one teacher.

I am also the Father of two boys in the FCPS system, one at Frost, one at Woodson. I am a graduate of Woodson from back in the day when there was a smoking area out back. Both my children struggle in school, we have endured a bitter divorce, loss of my job, loss of our home and loss of my mother over the past two years. The lowest point in our lives came this summer, having to live out of a tent in a local park. So we know first hand how situational depression can affect a person. But everyday we awake and drive on. Never give up, Never stop, Finish Strong. I have struggled to keep my children in the Woodson district because I believe it remains an excellent school. I have pushed my children to participate in sports because I believe it teaches them more about being a responsible adult than any classroom or teacher can or will. That being said, I have issues with many teachers and administrators at both schools, but I get involved, stay involved and call them out when I feel they deserve it. I am well aware that the systems are broken, not just the FCPS system. I do, however, believe the punishment in this case far out weighed the benefit and can't understand how any reasonable adult would believe that removing a kid from his support network and isolating him could possibly help him.

Nick's death has profoundly affected me as it should the rest of you. Suicide should never be the answer and common sense should be the rule when deciding the fate of any young life.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: VA ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:48AM

Clearly this is a tragic situation, and while we can't know what he was thinking, it does seem the stresses he was under were overwhelming.
FCPS isn't the only district that does this; all the VA districts do and it is due to VA's laws and zero tolerance.

Some have posted that parents and students sign that SRR, so they should know what to expect. What they expect is a hearing whose results aren't decided ahead of time. Why bother with hearings if they only result in expulsions from base schools? What purpose does it serve to have them go to another school instead of their original school, especially when the original school is getting other schools' students who committed the same infraction? Students arriving in the middle of the year, from out of boundary, are clearly kind of marked, right? I mean all would essentially know they had been in trouble, which only compounds issues of feeling like that incident has damaged their life.

Why not simply institute treatment classes, community service etc. and let them remain at their base school instead of simply transferring kids around schools?

I attended Woodson in the late 70's. There was an area simply called "out back" where kids who smoked pot, drank and probably did other stuff hung out while skipping classes. Counselors and others would sometimes wonder out there, but no one was expelled, students weren't forced from one school to the next, losing their friends and support systems..and yeah, maybe it wasn't the best way to handle those kids, but it seemed to work better. I write this to refute Stuart Gibson's claim that students can't learn while drugs are present on campus. They were very evident in previous decades; those like me who didn't use drugs or hang "out back" went to our classes and weren't impacted in the least. While I do wonder what became of some of the more notorious "stoners" most of those kids are now leading productive lives. Drugs are still rampant on campuses (with bathrooms probably being the "out back"), but now rote hearings are taking place.

VA districts should either do away with the so called hearings and simply initiate transfer papers the moment a child is caught, or truly have a hearing, and have differing consequences that are based on the circumstances. a joint doesn't equal distributing 50 lbs, a pen knife accidentally left in a backpack doesn't equal bringing a loaded gun with a hit list.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Concerned Adult ()
Date: January 22, 2011 10:30AM

So a kid gets caught with pot at WTWHS. The solution is moving him to a new school mid-year? That is a solution? In tenth grade? How many adults reading this can think back to being that age and having to transfer to a new school? That is traumatic. What is the ratio of these transfers between local high schools? From what I read here, WTWHS has a pattern of removing young males. Do they also take in others? One strike and your out? When teachers, coaches, and administrators make one mistake, are they treated like this? Anyone else know about this guy Yost and his perceived penchant for cutting an infected finger off rather than treating it with antibiotics? It is pot. How many people in the general public have tried pot in their teens and twenties? I can say that in my HS in the 70’s at least 50% tried it. I know my sons have tried it. How many adults that work in WTWHS have tried it? Should we do lie detector tests and throw them out?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TruthBeTold ()
Date: January 22, 2011 10:44AM

Question for someone who knows: I have learned that Nick Stuban's disciplinary situation may not have involved pot or any other drugs. I'm concerned because I am someone who wants to stick to facts, research, and data, and I would not want assumptions about his case to be used as "evidence" for support of an opinion or argument. Does anybody know the circumstances? Can they be shared without violating the family's privacy.

Having asked that, there remains a profound need for reform of the shell game FCPS plays with kids.

(Re FU, I'm familiar enough with this forum and have enough friends whose kids have been the subjects of discussion to know that families should expect respect from posts here, but not necessarily that their situations be left undiscussed. Many families I know are grateful when their situations give rise to robust discussion with the aim of improving systems that could affect other kids.)

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: really? ()
Date: January 22, 2011 11:11AM

"Every year, every child that attends a Fairfax County Public School signs and therefore agrees to the rules placed on them. These rules outline the punishments for bullying, drug use, drug dealing, bringing weapons to school, any many other things. If you all are so strongly opposed to this system, you do not have to sign this paper and you can happily send your child to a private school.
However, every student attending a Fairfax County Public School has agreed to these rules and therefore has no right to complain about them after they have violated one."


Geez, this feels like Nazi Germany or something.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: A friend ()
Date: January 22, 2011 11:18AM

Darwinism 1 - creationist 0

Oh and if you believe God and all that shit, nick is probably in hell burning right now for being a flaming homosexual. Survival of the fittest, mentally and physically.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: sad parent ()
Date: January 22, 2011 12:48PM

I attended and graduated WTW in 1978. Have a junior at FHS who knew of Nick from his brief time there. This is heart breaking. I'm so sorry for Nick's family. If you care to, sign his tribute page:

http://www.everlyfuneralhomes.com/obituaries/tribute.html?url=http://stei-23986.tributes.com/show/Nicholas-Stuban-90581133

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Woodson Student ()
Date: January 22, 2011 01:02PM

I feel so sorry for the Stuban family. HE was a great kid who was a great athlete too. Great at football and great at lax. He had a big heart, and love his friends. MY prayers go out to the stuban family and to him that he reached heaven peacefully.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 22, 2011 01:06PM

The soon to be reinstated U.S. Park Police Chief, Teresa Chambers, is a genuine heroine. She saw a wrong and tried to correct it in a time-honored tradition; she told the press. Her experience informed her that her force was woefully underfunded for its mission, and she sought to bring attention to this fact. For that, for telling the truth, she was fired. Now some seven years later, she has been fully vindicated, and fully paid. Justice was slow and tough in this case, but as Louis Brandeis said a hundred years ago "sunlight is said to be the best of disinfectants". Would that at least one or two principals in FCPS do the same.

I personally am an infrequent visitor to this forum, but it seems to me that every time I pull it up, some poor kid is being mourned after a senseless suicide, and the school system is part of the picture. Or perhaps posters are flaming each other over some group of student athletes who do something both dumb and commonplace (which does not excuse, but merely explains; though as the French say "Pour comprendre tout est de pardonner à tous" ) and administrators decry "hazing" and "abuse" -- leaving me to wonder, "how much of this is just bread and circuses, a few are fed to the lions so that the masses know everything is under control". I have experienced myself, with one of my kids, who is finally starting to master staying under the radar, how Kafkaesque the FCPS disciplinary process really is.

Most kids mess up in small, stupid ways (like one of mine), or even in much bigger ways. What we call childhood is in some measure an opportunity, deliberately created, to do this without heinous consequences. Before the Victorians invented our concept of childhood, kids were regarded as adults in smaller clothes who were expected to work as soon as they were able; and were hanged at age 9 for stealing bread when they were hungry, or burned at the stake when they were inconvenient. A bit of hyperbole perhaps, but not really so removed from administrators who, acting without a shred of real evidence or due process (we'll leave that for Civics class), effectively say to a student "look we know you don't always show the restraint you'll grow into, or good judgment like the 40-something who cut me off on my way to work today and nearly killed me, and we'll ignore the fact that we ourselves once 'drove my Chevy to the levee...and drank whiskey and rye', and we'll exile you for what at 16 seems permanent for behavior we can't tolerate because in reality we are more fearful of helicopter parents with lawyers in tow who just know you'll corrupt Junior than we are of you". The harsh truth about Zero Tolerance, and by extension its' practitioners, is that it's not about improving behavior, or providing a reasonable, adult perspective on what a kid has done. It's not about safety, and it certainly isn't about "teaching moments". It's about political and legal expediency. Or worse, it's about petty administrators with short memories, shallow lives, and an ax to grind. When the two collide, the results are lethal.

To Mr. Yost's defenders, I don't know the gentleman, and likely (dare I say hopefully, in the sense of getting one of "those" calls) never will beyond the signature I see on photocopied letters from the school. I know nothing of his family, and believe that is entirely off limits in any discussion that pertains to his or any principal's professional conduct -- which is all that should be talked about by persons who are neither family or friend. I will say, however, that a person who accepts a position with a higher public profile can expect more than a little invective, and their families should know this as well. If you say he is a prince among men, kind, caring, and generous, I have no basis to dispute your personal assessment.

What I find fault with is any administrator who adheres to a completely discredited adjudication and disciplinary system. Zero tolerance doesn't work, any fool can see that. It didn't work here. It wasn't the NYPD's ticketing of jaywalkers that lowered the crime rate during Mr. Giuliani's tenure as Mayor; it was a dip in the most crime prone demographic. They don't do Zero Tolerance anymore, they returned to "community policing"; you know, where the Cop on the beat knows the neighborhood and can diffuse the toughest of situations with knowledge of the players. Sort of like the principals I remember from high school, back in the 70s. The popular definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Anyone who subscribes, willingly and/or as a condition of employment, to a system that utterly fails in any legitimate objective, bares responsibility for its consequences. And the consequences, judging by events, can be horrific.

It's absurd to argue that students and parents sign the SR&R each year, and thus know what they are "getting into". In this county (in this society), I suspect there are just a handful of people who could read this "contract" and suddenly slap themselves on the forehead saying "so it's NOT okay to bring weapons to school, glad that was cleared up for me". Doubtless even the so called "toxic" parents know the rules without this silly little exercise. This is not about knowledge, it's about wisdom. Despite there being posted speed limits, some 40 million speeding tickets a year are written in this country. Somehow, traffic law still seems to function without yanking the driver's license of everyone caught doing 69 in a 55 mph zone the first time. It's called "mens rea", the "thing in mind", and it has been the basis of our legal and moral systems since the Code of Hammurabi. It's not the act, it's the intent that forms the basis of guilt or innocence. Zero Tolerance turns this on its head. In the name of "orderly" schools, FCPS throws out the very system we are teaching our kids to live by.

It may well be that Chief Chambers doesn't get the funding she needs, terrorists target a national monument, and scores are killed and injured, because the Park Police can't respond to calls they can't get on their surplused radios. But at least she's honorable enough to try, and willing to pay the price of that effort.

The School Board members that has been in office for more than one term should take responsibility for the death of this boy, publicly repudiate this insane system (built on the presidential ambitions of a political hack), re-publish the student's "Rights and Responsibilities" (do a search and see how many other school systems use FCPS's phrasing), and then fall on their collective political sword. To borrow from Oliver Cromwell, "Your have sat too long for any good you have been doing lately...Depart, I say, and let us have done with you. In the name of God, go!".

The current administration happily ensconced in Gatehouse should sell their palatial campus, putting the money where we residents want it, and work out of moldy trailers until the teacher/student ratio is at most 1:24 in every classroom in the county. This is the 21st century. They can run the entire system via a $49 a month account with WebEx. Premier school system in the nation, indeed!

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: Don't Get It ()
Date: January 22, 2011 01:27PM

Before our boys were old enough to attend WHS, we were thrilled that they were in such a great pyramid. Then they started WHS and the problems started. If your child is not an AP student, they are not cared about. If your child has a minor infraction within the school; throw the book at them. I have had experiences with the administration at Woodson, and was very disappointed to say the least. Mr. Yost seems interested only in AP and what that entails. If your kids aren't on the AP track, they are not important at Woodson.

Even an the Parents Orientation for Freshman last spring, Mr. Yost talked about his daughter and how she wanted to take as many AP courses as possible. The quesions that he was able to answer from the audience were about AP, GPA, SAT's, etc...

He is not concerned about the majority of the student population at Woodson, who are not in AP courses.

Fortunately, we have never had to have a hearing, but came close. When we went to have a meeting with Yost about the reason they were suspending our son for a day, for something minor, he litereally told us that if we pushed this issue, he would suspend our son for a week, instead of only a day.

My husband thought it best not to push the issue. Is that the way a top rated high school should be run by its administration? Parents in this community are some of the most successful people in the country, yet their kids seem to have no rights if they are not the "best and the brightest".

After 3 years at Woodson, and two sons attending now, I am highly disappointed in what we thought was going to be a great education. Too many boys that we know have been expelled; without sufficient evidence of anything! Teachers going through phone texts; invasion of privacy in any court of law; at Woodson, kid thrown out for what was written on a private text. Out of FCPS for good. Doesn't matter that the kid was a good athlete and student.

I don't get it; that we of this community are letting this "good" school district get away with this kind of Nazi treatment of our kids;their students. I would love to hear some honest words from teachers at Woodson who don't teach AP. How are they treated? Like second class citizens too?

Nick Stuban was a friend of my son's. Hearing that he was expelled with the family issues that he was dealing with, doesn't make any sense. This is not a cut and dried/black and white world. You took the kid out of his "village". How does that help anything?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Guest1986 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 02:10PM

Years ago as a 15 year old boy, I came home on Easter vacation and found my brother dead - shot in the heart. He committed suicide. For years I was angry with him that he could be so selfish and hurt those around him. Later in life I discovered that perhaps he was bi-polar, all the signs were there, but he just was diagnosed. To rant and rave and blame others - in the end, the person, even if they're only 15, makes the choice. So keep an eye on your kids, make sure they know that you're there for them, regardless of what they do. Kids didn't ask to be born. May his family find peace.

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: CBLB78 ()
Date: January 22, 2011 04:40PM

Don't Get It Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Before our boys were old enough to attend WHS, we
> were thrilled that they were in such a great
> pyramid. Then they started WHS and the problems
> started. If your child is not an AP student, they
> are not cared about. If your child has a minor
> infraction within the school; throw the book at
> them. I have had experiences with the
> administration at Woodson, and was very
> disappointed to say the least. Mr. Yost seems
> interested only in AP and what that entails. If
> your kids aren't on the AP track, they are not
> important at Woodson.
>
> Even an the Parents Orientation for Freshman last
> spring, Mr. Yost talked about his daughter and how
> she wanted to take as many AP courses as possible.
> The quesions that he was able to answer from the
> audience were about AP, GPA, SAT's, etc...
>
> He is not concerned about the majority of the
> student population at Woodson, who are not in AP
> courses.
>
> Fortunately, we have never had to have a hearing,
> but came close. When we went to have a meeting
> with Yost about the reason they were suspending
> our son for a day, for something minor, he
> litereally told us that if we pushed this issue,
> he would suspend our son for a week, instead of
> only a day.
>
> My husband thought it best not to push the issue.
> Is that the way a top rated high school should be
> run by its administration? Parents in this
> community are some of the most successful people
> in the country, yet their kids seem to have no
> rights if they are not the "best and the
> brightest".
>
> After 3 years at Woodson, and two sons attending
> now, I am highly disappointed in what we thought
> was going to be a great education. Too many boys
> that we know have been expelled; without
> sufficient evidence of anything! Teachers going
> through phone texts; invasion of privacy in any
> court of law; at Woodson, kid thrown out for what
> was written on a private text. Out of FCPS for
> good. Doesn't matter that the kid was a good
> athlete and student.
>
> I don't get it; that we of this community are
> letting this "good" school district get away with
> this kind of Nazi treatment of our kids;their
> students. I would love to hear some honest words
> from teachers at Woodson who don't teach AP. How
> are they treated? Like second class citizens too?
>
>
> Nick Stuban was a friend of my son's. Hearing
> that he was expelled with the family issues that
> he was dealing with, doesn't make any sense. This
> is not a cut and dried/black and white world. You
> took the kid out of his "village". How does that
> help anything?

I could not agree more with your take on Jeff Yost and the kids he and his administration take no interest in helping in school and life. I've told him the same thing to him directly and the community should know,

I'm glad my kids are out of there.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: fellow_student ()
Date: January 22, 2011 04:54PM

I think this is very sad and shouldn't have happened. I think the school system is at LEAST somewhat at fault, people- especially kids- do make mistakes. But I think if people turn his death into a battle with all of FCPS, it's somewhat disrespectful. I send my deepest condolences to his family, and may Nick Rest in Peace.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: current sophomore ()
Date: January 22, 2011 06:33PM

This is just disgusting. Honestly. It really is. The way woodson is handling this, the way people are pointing fingers. The worst is the way people are acting in school. It's repulsive.

Suicide is tragic. It's scary to think someone that walked to halls of woodson a few months ago is never going to be seen again. It's terrifying to think someone took their own life. But I am SO sick of it being glorified. Forgive me, I am not a heartless person. I did not know Nick. But I cried when i learned someone my own age took their own life. I cried for his family, for the people who knew him, for the people who were close to him.

But STOP blaming Yost. This was not his first offense. WHS has every right to remove someone from school who is in possession of drugs. Maybe there were other contributing factors to Nick's death. Maybe he was depressed all along. Maybe Fairfax High was good to him, but there were other problems in his life that were not Woodson related. Everyone is going to blame administration. Fingers will be pointed.

Bottom line? Being in possession of drugs on school property is against the law. He's lucky he didn't get arrested.

OH, And students? Stop dropping Nick's name to get attention. Stop acting like you knew him for your 15 minutes of fame. Stop making it your facebook status. Yeah, everyone has a right to grieve. But there's a fine line between grieving and looking for attention.

His poor family and friends are mourning right now. Please respect that.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: bravo! ()
Date: January 22, 2011 07:42PM

When I read this forum, it is primarily to find gems such as yours. It cheers me to think there are such wise and well spoken people as yourself out there, helping to enlarge others perspectives and encourage them to think more broadly. Thank you.

TheProfessor Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The soon to be reinstated U.S. Park Police Chief,
> Teresa Chambers, is a genuine heroine. She saw a
> wrong and tried to correct it in a time-honored
> tradition; she told the press. Her experience
> informed her that her force was woefully
> underfunded for its mission, and she sought to
> bring attention to this fact. For that, for
> telling the truth, she was fired. Now some seven
> years later, she has been fully vindicated, and
> fully paid. Justice was slow and tough in this
> case, but as Louis Brandeis said a hundred years
> ago "sunlight is said to be the best of
> disinfectants". Would that at least one or two
> principals in FCPS do the same.
>
> I personally am an infrequent visitor to this
> forum, but it seems to me that every time I pull
> it up, some poor kid is being mourned after a
> senseless suicide, and the school system is part
> of the picture. Or perhaps posters are flaming
> each other over some group of student athletes who
> do something both dumb and commonplace (which does
> not excuse, but merely explains; though as the
> French say "Pour comprendre tout est de pardonner
> à tous" ) and administrators decry "hazing" and
> "abuse" -- leaving me to wonder, "how much of this
> is just bread and circuses, a few are fed to the
> lions so that the masses know everything is under
> control". I have experienced myself, with one of
> my kids, who is finally starting to master staying
> under the radar, how Kafkaesque the FCPS
> disciplinary process really is.
>
> Most kids mess up in small, stupid ways (like one
> of mine), or even in much bigger ways. What we
> call childhood is in some measure an opportunity,
> deliberately created, to do this without heinous
> consequences. Before the Victorians invented our
> concept of childhood, kids were regarded as adults
> in smaller clothes who were expected to work as
> soon as they were able; and were hanged at age 9
> for stealing bread when they were hungry, or
> burned at the stake when they were inconvenient.
> A bit of hyperbole perhaps, but not really so
> removed from administrators who, acting without a
> shred of real evidence or due process (we'll leave
> that for Civics class), effectively say to a
> student "look we know you don't always show the
> restraint you'll grow into, or good judgment like
> the 40-something who cut me off on my way to work
> today and nearly killed me, and we'll ignore the
> fact that we ourselves once 'drove my Chevy to the
> levee...and drank whiskey and rye', and we'll
> exile you for what at 16 seems permanent for
> behavior we can't tolerate because in reality we
> are more fearful of helicopter parents with
> lawyers in tow who just know you'll corrupt Junior
> than we are of you". The harsh truth about Zero
> Tolerance, and by extension its' practitioners, is
> that it's not about improving behavior, or
> providing a reasonable, adult perspective on what
> a kid has done. It's not about safety, and it
> certainly isn't about "teaching moments". It's
> about political and legal expediency. Or worse,
> it's about petty administrators with short
> memories, shallow lives, and an ax to grind. When
> the two collide, the results are lethal.
>
> To Mr. Yost's defenders, I don't know the
> gentleman, and likely (dare I say hopefully, in
> the sense of getting one of "those" calls) never
> will beyond the signature I see on photocopied
> letters from the school. I know nothing of his
> family, and believe that is entirely off limits in
> any discussion that pertains to his or any
> principal's professional conduct -- which is all
> that should be talked about by persons who are
> neither family or friend. I will say, however,
> that a person who accepts a position with a higher
> public profile can expect more than a little
> invective, and their families should know this as
> well. If you say he is a prince among men, kind,
> caring, and generous, I have no basis to dispute
> your personal assessment.
>
> What I find fault with is any administrator who
> adheres to a completely discredited adjudication
> and disciplinary system. Zero tolerance doesn't
> work, any fool can see that. It didn't work here.
> It wasn't the NYPD's ticketing of jaywalkers that
> lowered the crime rate during Mr. Giuliani's
> tenure as Mayor; it was a dip in the most crime
> prone demographic. They don't do Zero Tolerance
> anymore, they returned to "community policing";
> you know, where the Cop on the beat knows the
> neighborhood and can diffuse the toughest of
> situations with knowledge of the players. Sort of
> like the principals I remember from high school,
> back in the 70s. The popular definition of
> insanity is doing the same thing over and over and
> expecting different results. Anyone who
> subscribes, willingly and/or as a condition of
> employment, to a system that utterly fails in any
> legitimate objective, bares responsibility for its
> consequences. And the consequences, judging by
> events, can be horrific.
>
> It's absurd to argue that students and parents
> sign the SR&R each year, and thus know what they
> are "getting into". In this county (in this
> society), I suspect there are just a handful of
> people who could read this "contract" and suddenly
> slap themselves on the forehead saying "so it's
> NOT okay to bring weapons to school, glad that was
> cleared up for me". Doubtless even the so called
> "toxic" parents know the rules without this silly
> little exercise. This is not about knowledge,
> it's about wisdom. Despite there being posted
> speed limits, some 40 million speeding tickets a
> year are written in this country. Somehow,
> traffic law still seems to function without
> yanking the driver's license of everyone caught
> doing 69 in a 55 mph zone the first time. It's
> called "mens rea", the "thing in mind", and it has
> been the basis of our legal and moral systems
> since the Code of Hammurabi. It's not the act,
> it's the intent that forms the basis of guilt or
> innocence. Zero Tolerance turns this on its head.
> In the name of "orderly" schools, FCPS throws out
> the very system we are teaching our kids to live
> by.
>
> It may well be that Chief Chambers doesn't get the
> funding she needs, terrorists target a national
> monument, and scores are killed and injured,
> because the Park Police can't respond to calls
> they can't get on their surplused radios. But at
> least she's honorable enough to try, and willing
> to pay the price of that effort.
>
> The School Board members that has been in office
> for more than one term should take responsibility
> for the death of this boy, publicly repudiate this
> insane system (built on the presidential ambitions
> of a political hack), re-publish the student's
> "Rights and Responsibilities" (do a search and see
> how many other school systems use FCPS's
> phrasing), and then fall on their collective
> political sword. To borrow from Oliver Cromwell,
> "Your have sat too long for any good you have been
> doing lately...Depart, I say, and let us have done
> with you. In the name of God, go!".
>
> The current administration happily ensconced in
> Gatehouse should sell their palatial campus,
> putting the money where we residents want it, and
> work out of moldy trailers until the
> teacher/student ratio is at most 1:24 in every
> classroom in the county. This is the 21st
> century. They can run the entire system via a $49
> a month account with WebEx. Premier school system
> in the nation, indeed!

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: he was my friend ()
Date: January 22, 2011 07:45PM

You people sicken me. A beloved member of the community and my best friend has just died and all you can do is blame people and make jokes. stop it and use your post for something more meaningfull than hatemail to Mr. Yost. He is a good man and would never have tried to harm anyone. you people who dont know him stop saying why he did it, we might never know. But for those of you who do remember the good times you had with him and relieze that he is at peace.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: a friend ()
Date: January 22, 2011 07:56PM

You were the worst of all you obviously didnt know him and you make a bold a statement as to say hes burnig in Hell? you make me sick to see there is someone so heartless in this world as you. He was an amazing human being and can never be replaced u jackass

> Darwinism 1 - creationist 0
>
> Oh and if you believe God and all that shit, nick
> is probably in hell burning right now for being a
> flaming homosexual. Survival of the fittest,
> mentally and physically.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Mom of recently transferred kid to Woodson ()
Date: January 22, 2011 09:10PM

Follow-up to my previous post, I share the article from the Washington Post.


http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2011/01/22/AR2011012203855_2.html

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: anonymous. ()
Date: January 22, 2011 10:33PM

that article is wrong on so many levels.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: mantua ()
Date: January 22, 2011 11:22PM

There are no advocates for kids in the school system! The teachers, counselors and administrators have the teachers union backing them. I have three kids; two at Woodson. All three have already gone through Mantua Elementary and Frost Middle. I have had more problems at Woodson with the teachers, counselors and administration then I dreamed I would. I have yet to see any of these groups act as advocates for my kids or others, especially the counseling department! When Mr. Elliott left Woodson I was hoping Mr. Yost would make a difference. He has made it worse. He has not only dumbed-it-down but he has also encouraged an atmosphere of 'you are assumed guilty if there is a suspicion'.

My kids have never been in trouble (keeping my fingers crossed that it continues) at school but instead have always been very academically focused (again, keeping my fingers crossed that it continues). Even with this extreme focus, I have never felt Mr. Yost connected and an advocate for my kids. So, I disagree with the remarks that Mr. Yost is more concerned with the AP students because my kids are those AP students. It seems Mr. Yost is not for either group, so his teachers and counselors follow his lead! My question is: Who is for the kids??

Michelle Rhee, the former Chancellor of D.C. Public Schools, started www.StudentsFirst.org, an organization that advocates for the students. She understands that the ones running the school systems are backed by the powerful teachers unions and the students have no one! She wants to change that and consequently started this organization.

What happened to Nick was the extreme and he should have never been transferred away from students that he has known since starting Mantua! The school system NEVER tosses out or transfers BAD teachers out of school like they did with Nick. There are a handful of teachers/counselors at Woodson that should be tossed out! This will not happen because they are protected by the unions. Our tax money pays the salaries of these bad teachers, counselors and administrators. Hopefully Michelle Rhee will be as aggressive and tenacious as she was in D.C. with this new organization she is putting together. Perhaps this organization can help FCPS rethink the way they do things and start taking the needs of the student (not the teacher) into account.

Mr. Yost, make a positive mark at Woodson and change the way things are done. Get rid of the ridiculous “return periods†because they are a complete waste of time! Replace this time with mandatory classes (not workshops) in depression, self-esteem, positive verses negative thoughts, bullying…etc, for the TEACHERs and then for the students. Yes, we parents teach our kids the above just like we teach them to read and write before school starts so please don’t say it is our responsibility to do the above. We do it at home but it needs to be taught at the school level as well!

Parents, be sure to go to www.ratemyteacher.com. I have found that the ratings I have read about teachers, counselors and administrators are accurate. This website is a way for parents to share information and stay informed!

Peace be with you Nick. Steve and Sandy, my heart goes out to you. God be with you during this terrible time.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: jojojojo ()
Date: January 23, 2011 01:14AM

You are somewhat mistaken. Essentially there are no teacher unions in Virginia. Yes, there are organizations that claim they are unions, but teachers in Virginia cannot collective bargain or strike, etc. All teachers can be terminated without cause immediately in VA. Whereas in DC, teachers have a contract negotiated by their union that outlines procedures for termination, layoffs, etc. Essentially teacher contracts in Fairfax protect the county and not the teacher. There may be problems in VA/Fairfax Schools but it is not caused by the unions. Stop watching Fox News.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: jojoho ()
Date: January 23, 2011 01:32AM

Don't confuse the two. In one case, a young man was outed by his roommate without his consent. In the other, a young man was given many chances to explain himself and ultimately was allowed to continue his education. According to the newspaper we don't even know what he was accused of doing, so he still has some privacy. I know this is a heartbreaking situation, but I think it is going to far to equate Fairfax County Public Schools with a vile young man who posted an internet video in order to embarrass his roommate.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: jimmy jones ()
Date: January 23, 2011 01:40AM

Clearly another parent who hasn't bothered to actually read the SRR. Parents are not required to be present during discussions between school personnel and students. Otherwise it would be called Home Schooling and not Public Schooling. Really, you think this principal wakes up every morning looking for ways to hate kid? Wow. You really don't understand the economics of NoVa. There are much more lucrative ways to hate children than being a principal of a high school. Hell, managers at McDonalds make more money!

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FCPS teacher ()
Date: January 23, 2011 10:14AM

To Duh Duh,

I am not sure where your child attends school, but there is no school in FCPS that assigns no homework, let alone for two months. Furthermore, interims come out the first or second week of October (1st quarter is over 31 October). I am not sure what teacher would tell you to wait until January for any grade. By the time January rolls around, you should have gotten 2 interim reports and a quarter grade. Ask your kid where his grades are. The district sends them home. Perhaps, your kid isn't bringing them to you.

But, with all of that having been said, yes: it is more your fault than the school's fault if your kid isn't doing his school work or isn't following the rules. You have more influence with your kid than we do. Please stop blaming the institution and take responsibility for the choices your kids make.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: a friend ()
Date: January 23, 2011 10:41AM

Please stop spreading rumors on the passing of Nick; lets respect the grief of family and friends and those that REALLY did know him. Nick was a wonderful person and only deserves wonderful things about him.

But I must say, the school knew about Nick's issues and I cannot understand why they chose to remove him from his support network. This makes no sense at all and must change

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FCPS cares ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:07AM

I know that you all are sad about what happened to this young man but have you considered how many drug addicts there would be anad how far kids would get into drugif FCPS did not enforce their rules. Most of the time when the child is caught it is brought up to the parent and acted on. Then the parent is required to get help for the kid. The way our society is now there are many many parents that are in denial or just dont care. At least a quarter of the parents out there only care about their own lives. I see it daily. The counselors and teachers can't even get the parents into the school. Some of the time there is only one parent that goes to the hearing office. Most of the time when FCPS cathces the kids doing drugs the child is mandated to go to drug counseling. Parents please wake up and see what really is going on with kids and drugs.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: stop the hearing officiers ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:25AM

iTs not just the Woodson principal, they are all to blame for allowing the nasty hearing officiers and the self serving school board to all allow this to happen. Kids will continue to make dumb choices..just like we all did and still do!

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:39AM

"But STOP blaming Yost. This was not his first offense". Now, THAT is a genuine Freudian slip.

Current Sophomore, I teach an Engineering discipline, not English composition; but basic literacy is axiomatic to success in the workplace. When one refers to an individual in a sentence, one does not switch from the singular to the plural, as you did. "It is a tragedy that a student took his life", not "It is a tragedy that a student took their life", to paraphrase you. I write this because, frankly, your perspective is a bit mature for an average 15 year one. If you are in fact an employee of the school system, then I am dismayed at your illiteracy. The remediation rate for American freshman entering public colleges and universities is nearly 60%. You need to do a better job, either as a student or as a teacher.

Also, while I do not agree with the current laws pertaining to drug usage and possession in our country, these are nevertheless part of the "law of the land". If the student was indeed in possession of an illegal substance, then it WAS a police matter. The fact that the police were not evidently involved just makes the "drug argument" suspicious. And even if the student was in possession of controlled substances, that does not explain the stupidity of a policy that would move him from one school to another. That's not corrective, it's punishment carefully crafted to circumvent Federal law regarding the rights of the student to a public education.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:55AM

Professor

It is quickly becoming accepted to use "their" instead of "his" or "his/her" in order to be gender neutral in our living, constantly changing language.

Nick's father is saying that Nick's transfer was not related to a breach of a law which makes this tragedy worse.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:58AM

FCPS cares()

Are you an employee of FCPS? I'm not shocked, just dismayed. You write, and (unfortunately) reason poorly. What data supports your ludicrous contention that the number of "drug addicts" would increase if FCPS (or any school system) did not enforce it's drug policies? Your insinuation that the parents of FCPS students are indifferent to their kids behavior is purely anecdotal and insulting. If you are indeed an employee of the system, then your perspective is too jaded and warped for you to make the types of unbiased, reasonable decisions required in education administration. I suggest your talents lie elsewhere.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Pyramid Parent ()
Date: January 23, 2011 12:01PM

"The Stuban family did not want to discuss the teenager's infraction - saying this was a time to remember Nick's life - but his father said it did not involve a violation of the law."

Above is from the Wash Post Article in today's paper.

"It wasn't a violation of the law?"

This poor boy truly fell through the cracks..so very very sad.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 23, 2011 12:20PM

I've read the SR&R, jimmy jones. It's not a student handbook, it's a legal contract drawn up by "B" school attorneys attempting to couch the current attitude of "Your children are animals, and we'll stop at nothing to protect hypothetical 'good' students" in citations of state law.

There is a world of difference between "parents are not required to be present" and "parents need not be and generally are not allowed to be present during interrogation". You are attempting to justify actions that, if they were to occur in society at large, would bring down the weight of our entire legal system.

Suspensions and expulsions are de facto punishments for infractions of the "law", just like incarceration is a punishment for robbing a bank. We as a society recognized a very long time ago that the "state" has an unfair advantage in legal proceedings and instituted mechanisms to ensure the rights of the accused. Students should not have to abrogate this fundamental birthright as the price of a public education. For any offense in which significant disruption is going to occur in a student's education, parents (or an unbiased advocate) should be present in any interrogation. Federal law states that every American child is entitled to a free public education. School officials need to explain why they plan to change that.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 23, 2011 12:20PM

jimmy jones Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Parents are not required to be present during discussions between school personnel and students.<

Parents are required to be contacted before any questioning regarding a disciplinary matter takes place per School Board regulation.

Further, no police officer, including SROs, may question minor without permission of the parent or guardian as a minor cannot waive their Miranda rights.

Yet it happens everyday in every high school in FCPS.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FCPS cares ()
Date: January 23, 2011 12:22PM

Sorry about the writing but I am under the chemo now and my kids graduated in the 90's but back then they did not have anything to help kids that were doing drugs and with my 4 kids they lost several friends to car crashes (under influence) or overdose. It carried to their early adult life and did not want to continue schooling and would only work to get enough money to carry them for a month or two. At the ages of 32 to 24 still at times comes to live back at home. The kids that did the drugs lost the drive to excel. As far as I can tell it is still the same with the kids that do drugs. At least Fairfax County has programs to help the kids now. That is all that I was trying to say.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Thomas More ()
Date: January 23, 2011 12:29PM

FCPS cares Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> At least Fairfax County has programs to help the kids now.<

Kids on suspension or expulsion are abandoned by FCPS. They fall behind in class and frequently drop out.

FCPS's disciplinary system is counterproductive and dysfunctional.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Current Sophmore ()
Date: January 23, 2011 01:53PM

Professor,

Please excuse that my grammar isn't flawless, as a 16 year old honors English student. Please excuse the fact that this website was making me so angry and upset last night, that I couldn't see straight.

But I stand by my previous statements. Principal Yost didn't come up with the policy himself. So why point fingers, parents?

If I had a child, I would not want them to attend high school among students in possession of drugs. The disciplinary process is fair. There are plenty of advocates for students at school. These parents who write on here are just so pretentious in thinking their children are above the law.

Suicide is tragic. But please, I hope people see this for what it really is.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: no child left behind ()
Date: January 23, 2011 02:08PM

I agree that those kids fall behind. The kids will sit at home for months before a decision is made. Meanwhile the students are losing out on their educations. When they return, they are even further behind and they eventually just give up.

We need to take care of the educational needs at the very least as a school system.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: current sophmore ()
Date: January 23, 2011 02:13PM

I admit, these children need more help then discipline. But we don't know what nick's offense was. The washington post article was wrong to publish so soon after his death.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 23, 2011 02:40PM

FCPS cares(),

I really don't want to be confrontational, but name two. Two programs that FCPS has that are set up for students in distress. Citing polices and procedures that are mandated by state and/or Federal law won't do. These have to be genuine, "home grown", "we do this because it's the right thing to do", programs.

A cursory check of FCPS's website for such programs was fruitless for me; although I deliberately spent only a few seconds checking -- as if I was a parent or student in trouble looking for help and not a careful researcher. I did note, however, that they have (recently?) placed a 30 second video on the evils of "sexting".

My first thought is "what a keen sense of the obvious they have, why are tax dollars being spent on this, support from Cox notwithstanding". My second thought was "I'm not an attorney, but I believe this is still unsettled law; it's not clear that DAs can successfully prosecute, and not have overturned, 14 year olds for the manufacture and distribution of child pornography of themselves (though it is a good idea to emphasize the 'humiliation' aspect as the video does, since that is a much more effective message to status conscious teenagers)". My third thought was "since only a small percentage of FCPS students would be 18 and therefore subject to adult adjudication, what is the point behind this?" Moreover, since students are not allowed to use cell phones and other communications devices in school, according to the SR&R, how does this issue even relate to the school system, aside of all of us wanting to generally protect kids from childish acts with far reaching implications.

Then I recall "oh yea, FCPS claims some extraordinary jurisdiction that essentially intrudes into the lives of students, and by extension, parents, 24/7 as they say".

I certainly don't want kids to "sext" (my kids know I can and will check their phones, review the call logs, and have the skills necessary to do a forensic analysis), but this video is shameless fear mongering, wrapped up to look like a "concerned" message. It's a way of justifying quasi-police state tactics -- "we need to protect you from yourself". How unfortunate that this attitude does not inform the disciplinary actions that school officials take. It's hard to see how suspensions or expulsions or transfers to other schools are very helpful.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: CBLB78 ()
Date: January 23, 2011 02:42PM

FCPS teacher Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> To Duh Duh,
>
> I am not sure where your child attends school, but
> there is no school in FCPS that assigns no
> homework, let alone for two months. Furthermore,
> interims come out the first or second week of
> October (1st quarter is over 31 October). I am not
> sure what teacher would tell you to wait until
> January for any grade. By the time January rolls
> around, you should have gotten 2 interim reports
> and a quarter grade. Ask your kid where his
> grades are. The district sends them home. Perhaps,
> your kid isn't bringing them to you.
>
> But, with all of that having been said, yes: it is
> more your fault than the school's fault if your
> kid isn't doing his school work or isn't following
> the rules. You have more influence with your kid
> than we do. Please stop blaming the institution
> and take responsibility for the choices your kids
> make.


FCPS Teacher and FCPS Cares:

Your argument falls apart when a parent can't get a straight answer on a child's progress and assignments from a kid who is having problems and the majority of teachers refuse to communicate any information directly to a parent via e-mail so they can prevent problems. This lack of help by the school and the administration comes even after communications upfront to the teachers about their child's struggles with ADD. The school also puts many roadblocks up to prevent any special accommodations for a child who needs help and the counselors just try to label a kid as lazy.

I saw the real character of the teachers when 2 of 3 teachers would not put in the ten minutes for feedback on a child for a professional evaluation as requested by the Doctor despite follow ups. This was for a kid who never had a disciplinary issue at the school ever. Is that how FCPS cares? Instead of pushing blame on the parents why don't you strive more for a partnership and balance.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Concerned Community Member ()
Date: January 23, 2011 03:41PM

If you think that any principal has enough sway over a kid's life to cause them to commit suicide, you're off your nut.

There were many things going on in Mr. Stuban's personal life. Being expelled from Woodson was only a small part of his troubles.

I can understand children lashing out and blaming Mr. Yost, but if you are an adult who is contributing to that nonsense, you should be ashamed of yourself. It's childish and needs to stop.

A young man is dead - and needlessly so. Throwing a principal under the bus will do nothing to solve the problem of depression and suicide in the Fairfax area.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: TheProfessor ()
Date: January 23, 2011 03:44PM

Acceptable to whom? Commonplace, yes, but acceptable, no. Even a simple Grammarian such as the one in MS Word flags this construction. What is acceptable today is the use of the feminine pronouns "her" and "she" as gender-neutral in statements that historically would have been made with the masculine form.

I have been using email a very long time, probably longer than many readers here have been alive. What we now refer to as the "Internet" was available (without the web, and other common features today) long before it's commercialization in 1993 to colleges and universities (I work at one), the government, the military, and so forth. Back when dinosaurs roamed the Earth (1985) we used to say about email, "It's bad manners to insult someone over their poor spelling or bad grammar, but it's far worse to insult your readers by not taking the care needed to spell correctly and use correct grammar".

I mean no discourtesy to any "civilian" user of this forum. I made this petty point because I was wary that the poster was employed by FCPS. I have been told that the school system has people who peruse forums such as this, looking for and spinning various controversial issues -- which is both craven and a profound waste if true. I regard my source, an employee of the system, as reliable; however in all fairness I much stress that it is still hearsay. That being said, I construed the poster's remarks to be defensive of FCPS policy. That's really, really hard to do in this circumstance, and something I wouldn't expect the "average" person to do. Support the principal, yes, if you have personal knowledge of him and his good deeds. That is something I can respect, though I may not agree. But a policy that tosses kids out when they're vulnerable, or even more absurdly moves them from one school to another is inexpiable.

In any event, someone in education has a higher responsibility not to be sloppy in discourse. Because if we're sloppy, the students are sloppy; but then we've already lost our moral authority to assess them.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: so very sad ()
Date: January 23, 2011 04:08PM

Two thing that have recently been discussed on FXU:

- This tragic case

- That FCPS is conducting an audit of insurance fraud amongst FCPS employees, and is allowing employees to quickly drop unqualified 'dependents' after they are found in the audit, with no apparent consequences

It seems more than passing strange that a system gives adults in it's employ a the benefit of a second chance, and yet comes down so hard on the children it is supposed to serve. Isn't that exactly backwards? Shouldn't adults be held to a higher standard, and kids be treated like, well, kids.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: colonialsftw ()
Date: January 23, 2011 04:35PM

so i don't go to woodson. it's my base high school, and i've heard from a lot of alumni about how great it is and a lot of my friends there tell me that it's amazing and how they love it there. i go to jefferson. that's right, tj. you might say that i should back off and that i don't know shit about the school system, because i'm in the little bubble known as tj. we do have problems...cheating isn't tolerated at all. my friends' high schools, cheating is accepted sometimes. dr. glazer? he'll pretty much kill you for it.
however, that's not the point i'm trying to make. everyone on facebook, etc. was talking about this nick stuban, and i was curious. then i came across this, and i'm appalled.
none of you should be pointing fingers at mr. yost and saying that him and the "monsters" are responsible for stuban's death. kids make mistakes, yeah, but ultimately, they are responsible for their mistakes. sure, you might think the removal was a bit on the harsh side, and i agree. but i don't think that stuban (bless his soul) committed suicide for only this reason. i don't know the family, so i'm inferring, but there may have been negligence from the family. his mom's suffering from ALS and he's an only child. this isn't the type of setting for a child to be nurtured and taken care of. it only makes sense that he may have felt a little alone.
and stop blaming yost. and for those of you (i'm looking at you, thomas more) that are saying his son wouldn't have to deal with anything because he could just go to woodson and be under yost's wing, you're wrong. his daughter's a freshman there. she's technically not even in the woodson pyramid, she went to frost because of the GT program. her older brother (now in college) went to FAIRFAX. not woodson. FAIRFAX. and her younger brother, as previously mentioned, is too young.
and for those of you who are saying that yost is attacking the boys? i'm pretty sure yost is male. he knows what boys go through, too. and those of you who are saying more boys get in trouble than girls? yeah. THAT MAKES SENSE. boys are more likely to do drugs, alcohol, possess weapons, do pot, etc. than girls. pay attention to the facts.

and stop pointing fingers. we're not in kindergarten here.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: So sad: to TJ student ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:01PM

Suicide and you BLAME the family or for being a male. God rest your soul that you never suffer from depression or anyone close to you. I am successful and I have suffered from depression. It came on after a life event I could not control.

I am so thankful I have money and knew a doctor who could help me. Most or many are not so lucky.

I wish you luck with your future. You are young and seem to judge for what you do not know.

From: Now a happy dad.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: DefendingColonialsFTW ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:19PM

So Sad, are you dumb?
When did the TJ kid (I am one as well) blame the family or for being a male? D you actually read the post, or did you just see a few words here and there and try to make sense of it?
He/She said that people shouldn't be pointing fingers at Jeff Yost, and pointed out things about males because many commenters were saying that Yost was harsh primarily towards males. He/She gave facts about males involving getting in trouble at school, NOT committing suicide. And he/she said that the family environment was not an ideal one, and I have to agree. Im not blaming them. I'm saying that statistics show that kids in situations such as Stuban's are more likely to commit suicide than, say, a child in the typical Lifetime movie type of family.

Come on, people. Read here. And stop blaming.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: fcps ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:21PM

fcps is great i don't know what the hell you all are talking about.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: fyost ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:26PM

Fuck Yost.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Gowalum ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:44PM

Regardless of your opinion on whether there should be a 1 strike your out policy or not at the Fairfax County Schools it is known that schools still have a long way to go in addressing mental health in their students whether it be when a student is in trouble or if the student is bullied or if the student is classified as having a mental illness or anything else. The school is the 2nd most responsible guardianship for a child after the home. That is true whether its a 7 year old or a 17 year old. I was in the category of "Emotionally Disturbed" due to anxiety and I came close to suicide in 2003. I can honestly say that it gets better. Also, the hurt that my suicide would have caused to my family and the fact that it is never in God's will makes me scared that I made a half-hearted attempt in 2003. I am not condemning the one who committed suicide here at all, but I am warning those who may be thinking about suicide NEVER to allow it to happen. Even when you feel dark, alone, and frightened people can help. There are resources when one goes to a teacher, parents, friends, clergy, etc.. Also there is a hotline I called in 2003 after my suicide attempt and it is a worthwhile one to call. The number is 1-800-SUICIDE http://www.hopeline.com/. There are many other resources as well like www.save.org.
May God bless Nick Stuban and his family.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Gowalum ()
Date: January 23, 2011 05:49PM

As for the 1 strike policy I feel, though I may be wrong, that there needs to be intense discipline for drugs and other offenses, but 1 strike your out is a very bad policy in my opinion unless it is an act where other students safety is at danger like a serious weapon being brought to school. They can also use suspension before resorting to expulsion. Its not good to say "oh drugs and alcohol are normal" but at the same time expelling a student for it after 1 offense may be damaging their futures rather then helping them grow up which is the purpose of discipline and the expulsion beliefs.
At the same time I am not defending the anything goes approach and I think there is a very rationaly median.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: FCPS student ()
Date: January 23, 2011 06:30PM

Ok im writing this quick so please dont comment on my grammar. Expelling students for the possession of something as Harmless as pot it not the answer. Do you think this solves anything? I have a friend who was recently expelled for pot and do you think this detoured his drug use? No, this only led him to doing other much more serious things and caused him depression. I just hope people read this and realize how.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Been there ()
Date: January 23, 2011 07:12PM

I know from personal experience that a principal can be forced to write the recommendation for expulsion by their boss, even if they don't agree.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: To: the TJ student ()
Date: January 23, 2011 07:17PM

Real life in Fairfax is not a typical Lifetime movie. Maybe in your cluster of family and friends. When was the last time someone killed themselves from TJ? So you made your point. Lucky you!

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: RIP ()
Date: January 23, 2011 07:22PM

In time of grieve, emotions are raw and people naturally looks for someone to blame. My heartfelt condolence to the family, but blaming the administrators for doing their job according to policies is moronic. Seems like everyone want to blame the system, the way a teenager's brain work, family circumstances, etc...
I guess I'm the minority here. Life sucks!! Sh*t happens. Not every kids commit suicide when faced with these type of experiences. In fact, I bet there are cases where disciplinary actions imposed may have saved a kid's future, shocking him/her into seeing the consequences of his/her stupid actions...and may have saved lives.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: DefendingColonialsFTW ()
Date: January 23, 2011 08:20PM

I realize that life in Fairfax isn't the typical Lifetime movie. Did I say it was? But even you have to admit, Stuban's family situation was in fact a tragic one that may have added to what Stuban was feeling. I'm not blaming it on anyone, like many people have previously (blaming it on Yost? Come on, now).

And WOW stereotype much? Are you insinuating that everything is just dandy at TJ? Last week, a girl in my grade tried to commit suicide and is now in counseling. She's the girlfriend of my best friend. Don't even GO there.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: To the TJ student ()
Date: January 23, 2011 08:42PM

You live in a fantasy world. Keep working on those SAT's. The rest of us our NOT in a Lifetime movie. We live day in and day out for our kids. I feel sorry for the youngster who killed himself and his family.

You will never know what life will hand you. I hope you never feel the pain this family feels. Keep thinking and pointing out how smart you are. The most interesting people I have met did not go to an Ivy league school.

BTW: I cannot remember the last time someone asked or cared where I went to HS.

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Re: Fairfax High School student
Posted by: Dane Bramage ()
Date: January 23, 2011 08:50PM

Woodson Mom Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> Everyone, we must also remember that drug or
> marijuana use, even if it is only used once, can
> trigger a personality change in a child.


That is pure fallacy. Pot is no more dangerous than alcohol. I think you may have watched one too many scared-straight gov't propaganda shows.

and no, I don't smoke it.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: woodson mom ()
Date: January 23, 2011 08:54PM

exactly.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Sad ()
Date: January 23, 2011 09:22PM


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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: A Fellow Teammate ()
Date: January 23, 2011 09:29PM

Nick was a fellow teammate of mine and I will never forget him. He was a great kid. He always put a smile on everyones face and was never in a bad mood. If I was having a bad day I would physically look for Nick in the hallway to cheer me up. There are various groups on Facebook about Nicks death. If you look at any of these groups all of the comments are postive. Most of them say how funny he was and how he was a good kid. I really believe he was a good kid but just got caught up with bad things like most teenagers do. I have noticed around school, almost everyone has tried pot once. I personally believe that the use of marijuana was not the cause of Nicks sucicide. Please do not talk bad about my friend and as a teammate he is my brother. He is part of my family and when people talk bad about my family I get mad just like anyone else would. Nick has three very stong families. One is the football team, the other is the lacrosse team and the last and most important is his realy family. When you make jokes and blame people about nicks death that makes all of us mad. We are all grieving right now and this does not help.

Im really missing you right now nick. Your one hell of a kid and one hell of a brother. Im never going to forget you and I see you when my time comes. RIP Nick Stuban.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: ZERO tolerance! ()
Date: January 23, 2011 10:46PM

You crackers don't care when our minority or poor white kids get thrown out of school for a first offense involving drugs/weapons.

But your precious Biff should get 3 or 4 chances for the same offense? Fuck that!

Zero tolerance is the only, repeat ONLY, way to insure equal treatment of ALL kids in this racist society.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: you people are insane ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:10PM

Given that no one knows the offense for which he was expelled, I find it hard to believe that you all are spending so much of your time blasting FCPS. Maybe you should get off the computer and go spend some time with your kids. That might keep them from getting into the trouble you are blaming FCPS for. FCPS didn't make your kid bring a weapon to school or do drugs, they only reacted to it. This thread started as a way for people to post memories about a lost child, and has turned into a bashing session that is not only unproductive but downright insane.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: 0tolerance ()
Date: January 23, 2011 11:36PM

All these whiners about giving kids 2nd and 3rd chances. They'll change their tune in a heart beat when a drugged up kid decided to bring an ak47 and spray their classmates.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Dane Bramage ()
Date: January 24, 2011 06:29AM

0tolerance Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> All these whiners about giving kids 2nd and 3rd
> chances. They'll change their tune in a heart
> beat when a drugged up kid decided to bring an
> ak47 and spray their classmates.

More fallacy.

Clinton, Bush, and Obama all used and look where it got them.

Truth be told, more violent behavior and deaths are caused by alcohol than pot.

Zero tolerance is crap.

-------------------------------------------------
“We don’t have any rude, unpleasant people here. We’re different!”

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: angry ()
Date: January 24, 2011 08:09AM

First, condolences to the Stuban family. My heart goes out to them.

Second, this thread is fascinating in many ways. My child (an athlete) goes to one of the larger school in the county. For a long while now he's said that the principal doesn't run the school, the AD does. Stories abound about star athletes grossly violating the SR&R (eg. punching a teacher in the face) and deals being cut so he could still play. It's hard for the kids to have respect for an administration that is SO hypocritical.

Also,ever notice that the definition of bullying in the SR&R only applies to the peer on peer variety? So a security guard or teacher or administrator (or all of them together) can bully a student and face no consequences? It happens. Want to know what it does to students? Read the articles below.

http://www.stopbullyingnow.com/teachers%20who%20bully%20students%20McEvoy.pdf

http://teachers.net/gazette/wordpress/bill-page/are-teachers-the-biggest-bullies-in-school/

Good behavior starts at home and parents need to take responsibility. But no matter how involved, caring, and focused on character parents are, teens are prone to make mistakes. I don't know any who haven't done something stupid; some are just luckier than others in terms of being caught and/or connected. The school administration has gotten to point of being more hindrance than help, and all the character education is worthless if the administrators are the ones who don't listen or display respect and integrity when dealing with kids. My stomach turns just thinking about how much I dislike these people.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Priapus ()
Date: January 24, 2011 08:29AM

So do the parents get a full deduction this year for this kid?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Good Parent ()
Date: January 24, 2011 11:21AM

I had two kids go throught Woodson. I put my younger ones in private school because of People like Yost and his actions. It is reputation above the needs of kids. Best move I ever made. My kids are cared for in private school. I know it and they know it. Every kid has an IEP but it is not a bunch of worthless paper. Every kid is nutured and cared for. They are not thrown out for one mistake. You get what you pay for.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Rhodes ()
Date: January 24, 2011 01:08PM


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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: reality ()
Date: January 24, 2011 01:24PM

I am not surprised to see that the best posts on here are from kids. The Tj kids made cogent points that were quickly misrepresented by adults who brought their own problems to the board instead of discussing the event at hand. Do you people think that the fcps people involved in his education are high fiving each other?? You self absorbed brats pointing fingers have the benefit of hindsight that the people who make REAL decisions do not. They have a responsibility to ALL of their students, not just those in trouble, and they are required to follow the law and fcps regs. Some of their decisions have great outcomes, others do not. You can question the decision adminitrators made a few months ago to transfer this boy all you want, but to say it lead directly to his suicide is irresponsible at best. The loss of this boy is tragic, it should not be twisted by adults with personal agendas into a misplaced vendetta. Have some shame people.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: non-reality ()
Date: January 24, 2011 03:30PM

So the abusive jack-booted gestapo thugs are now pleading that they were "only following the regulations".That's the same gutless,lame, chicken-shit excuse the nazis offered for slaughtering millions. Oh but dear sir, we were only following orders...pffffttt. Pathetic.....

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Tax Payer ()
Date: January 24, 2011 04:41PM

Yost has never sent out so many e mails regarding any one subject since he was principle. I guess we are now to think that he actually cared for Nick? Hindsight and articles in the Post will do this to a guy who selectively uses regulations to ruin young men. A full investigation needs to be done here. Are they expulsing more students per capita versus Robinson or Lake Braddock? All three pull from similar demographics. Is there a sexual bias against males at WTW HS? I know kids have gone many times from WTW HS to Lake Braddock and Fairfax. Is the route reversible? This is our tax dollars at work. We deserve answers. What would Nick want us to do?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: f u place ()
Date: January 24, 2011 04:43PM

A new low, comparing the holocast to disciplining kids in a public school.No wonder people go off the deep end consistantly in Fairfax.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Rhodes ()
Date: January 24, 2011 04:45PM

Can someone post Yost's emails? I assume these are going out to parents and staff only?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Our Nazi SB ()
Date: January 24, 2011 04:48PM

I think the SB loves to control everyone and we are only allowed to take what we are given. We are not to fight back since they know what is right for our kids.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: secondchances ()
Date: January 24, 2011 04:50PM

So, now any principal who signs a recommendation to expel must consider that he may be signing a young person's death warrant.

Is this what the people of Fairfax want? If not, we need to do the needful to democratically replace the school board at the next election and require the new board to hire capable, thoughtful administrators.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: Another idea? ()
Date: January 24, 2011 05:08PM

We need a board of professionals, therapist, psychologist, mentors, ect. This board will take each child on a case to case basis. Heck Judge Judy would be better. The SB should NOT have the authority to expel a child.


Do you want the drunk Liz Bradsher to vote on any child. She is a complete nut job. Someone needs to send her packing.

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: secondchances ()
Date: January 24, 2011 05:34PM

I was aware that Liz was a loose cannon, but only recently have noticed that people are wondering about her alcohol consumption...was there something specific that gave rise to this? Otherwise, perhaps it's just name-calling? If so, probably that's not fair. Can anyone shed some light on this?

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Re: Fairfax High School student | Nick Stuban
Posted by: on Liz ()
Date: January 24, 2011 05:38PM

Read the thread called "Collusion of School Board Member Liz Bradsher for Political Gain". There are some emails gained through the FOIA in there that will make her love of drinking apparent. If you have ever seen her in person, you will also understand that she has a drinking problem.

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