Re: Why do you live here?
Posted by:
Nova is the Bestest
()
Date: April 01, 2010 08:58AM
I live here because I like the fact that it takes 45 minutes to drive 8 miles. I mean, do you really want to get to work that bad anyway? Why not enjoy your morning sitting in traffic, burning $3 a gallon gas while listening to your neighbors stereo; the one in the purple Impala on dubs sounds like it's about to shake to pieces, the Tercel is playing Mariachi music.
I live here because there's no sense of community whatsoever. What's the point in saying "Hi" to a stranger or even acknowledging your neighbor? You've gotta get to the mall, or to Wegmans ASAP. There's no time for niceties.
I live here because I love to see kids in high-school driving BMW's and Mercedes. Why teach them to value or work for things? They're entitled, and they're just gonna slam it into a jersey wall one night anyway.
I live here because I enjoy the fact that "Americans" (those whose native language is something close to English) are quickly becoming, if not already, the minority. God forbid they actually learn a bit of the culture or the language. It's much better to just have plenty of enterpreters on hand to pander to them. I enjoy seeing them leaving Macy's or Nordstrom, wearing their brightly colored native garb, jumping into their $60k automobile, cat-calling any "5+" that walk by their construction site, or driving 45 in the fast lane on 66.
I love living here because there are hardly any trees or nature scenes any more, not compared to 15 or so years ago. Those couple acres of woods were an eyesore. I'd much rather look at that strip mall.
I love living here because there's nothing like renting a 1BR, 500Sf apartment for $1000+, or a newly built, single family home for $500k+. I really don't know why there'd be any sort of "housing crisis"?
I love living here because there's nothing more terrifying than a middle-upper class, suburban gang member. There kids are hardened on the mean streets of Alexandria, Arlington, Falls Church, etc. They're most easily identified by their tattoos ($100 a pop), and the fact that regardless of race, usually call eachother "Nigga". If gang-life doesn't work out, they can always get a job with dad's Software Development company.
I love living here because of all the money. All the business executives that leisurely roll into work everyday, usually from somewhere in "new" Loudoun County, Potomac or Bethesda, driving a champagne colored Lexus, wearing their "smart" blazer and slacks, with a bunch of marbles bouncing around in their head. They don't have a clue of what's going on, but they either got their MBA, were an officer in the military, or just knew the right people. Now they make 6 figures sitting at their desks slurping diet sodas, going to "meetings", doing their best to make sure you know they're an "executive", and trying to rip off everyone else so they can get ahead. They contribute nothing to society, have moderately attractive housewives and ugly, pretentious children, and again, do everything they can to let you know they're an "executive". These are the folks that are "leading" business in America today.
Actually, I hate living here, but everytime I try to get out, it pulls me back in. I'm on the three year plan now, and after three years, the place I move to will no doubt have become a mini-Nova itself.