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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: RoadKill ()
Date: September 11, 2009 08:45PM

The nice part is when that section ends, it feeds the bicyclists into a small two lane section and on the other end, a two lane section over hill with a blind curve. Perfect place to pick off bicyclists.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Ivan ()
Date: September 11, 2009 08:50PM

RoadKill Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The nice part is when that section ends, it feeds
> the bicyclists into a small two lane section and
> on the other end, a two lane section over hill
> with a blind curve. Perfect place to pick off
> bicyclists.


Lance wannabees- 9 pts.

Illegal Immigrants- 6 pts.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: PhoneHome ()
Date: September 11, 2009 08:58PM

RoadKill Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The nice part is when that section ends, it feeds
> the bicyclists into a small two lane section and
> on the other end, a two lane section over hill
> with a blind curve. Perfect place to pick off
> bicyclists

I thought this is where the spandexters on wheels perform the ever-cunning ET move and took off into space with their Reese pieces scattering out of their handle bar baskets.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 11, 2009 08:59PM

RoadKill Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> The nice part is when that section ends, it feeds
> the bicyclists into a small two lane section and
> on the other end, a two lane section over hill
> with a blind curve. Perfect place to pick off
> bicyclists.

More likely force motorists to slow down and wait for us cyclists to grant you room to pass.

Frustrated motorist (because you won't willingly hit us) - Priceless

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: September 11, 2009 09:03PM

Berdhuis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

>
> More likely force motorists to slow down and wait
> for us cyclists to grant you room to pass.
>



Berdhuis - 10 points

2 point bonus if you sever his spine

5 point bonus if you make him go airborne

Blessed are the murderous.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/11/2009 09:03PM by eesh.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: LOLcat ()
Date: September 11, 2009 09:11PM

eesh Wrote:

> >
>
>
> Berdhuis - 10 points
>
> 2 point bonus if you sever his spine
>
> 5 point bonus if you make him go airborne


150 poyents if few evade jail time

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: swerving ()
Date: September 14, 2009 09:40AM

LOLcat Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
>
> > >
> >
> >
> > Berdhuis - 10 points
> >
> > 2 point bonus if you sever his spine
> >
> > 5 point bonus if you make him go airborne
>
>
> 150 poyents if few evade jail time


Priceless!

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 14, 2009 10:01AM

So I'm on Braddock yesterday, and traffic is moving along 45 to 50 miles an hour. I go around a bend, and immediately have to slam on my brakes to avoid rear-ending the car in front of me who had slammed on his brakes to avoid rear-ending a cyclist riding right down the center of the road in his faggoty spandex racing outfit at about 10 miles an hour.

We followed him for a half a mile before he finally turned. I've been behind tractors that move faster. I didn't see anyone, pedestrian or otherwise on the sidewalk, but I guess he couldn't ride there because of all the micro-impacts.

Much smarter to ride on the busy road and take the chance of a mega-impact.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: WorkinReston ()
Date: September 14, 2009 03:01PM

This was a huge improvement!! Kudos! When this road was 4 lanes there was no left OR right turn lane. Now there is a center turn lane for non-lighted intersections and left turn lanes at the traffic lights. There are STILL no right turn lanes so nothing has changed...Pay attention and you wont rear-end someone making a right turn or someone riding in the bike lane!

I’ve wondered how long it would take for them to change the lanes on this stupid 2 mile stretch of road...finally! For those who are bitching...this is literally a span of maaaaybe 2 miles...are you serious!? It was pointless for this road to be 4 lanes for such a short length and then have a merge. Lane merges cause issues because people in Northern Virginia don’t know what the little yellow merge signs mean and just ride the lane out until they can’t ride it out anymore and THEN expect people who ARE following the rules to let them in...idiots you just had to be one of those who feel they are more important. Sorry, had to vent.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 14, 2009 03:03PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So I'm on Braddock yesterday, and traffic is
> moving along 45 to 50 miles an hour. I go around
> a bend, and immediately have to slam on my brakes
> to avoid rear-ending the car in front of me who
> had slammed on his brakes to avoid rear-ending a
> cyclist riding right down the center of the road
> in his faggoty spandex racing outfit at about 10
> miles an hour.
>
> We followed him for a half a mile before he
> finally turned. I've been behind tractors that
> move faster. I didn't see anyone, pedestrian or
> otherwise on the sidewalk, but I guess he couldn't
> ride there because of all the micro-impacts.
>
> Much smarter to ride on the busy road and take the
> chance of a mega-impact.

He must have been training for an important event - good for him.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 14, 2009 03:19PM

Yes. I'm sure it was very important. The same way it's important that I take a shit when I get home from work.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Harry Tuttle ()
Date: September 14, 2009 03:42PM

"Cyclists" please....

Stay the fuck out of the road! You aren't cars! I will honk at each and every one of you!

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 14, 2009 03:52PM

Harry Tuttle Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> "Cyclists" please....

Okay.

> Stay the fuck out of the road!

No.

> You aren't cars!

Yes.

> I will honk at each and every one of you!

Thank you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/14/2009 03:56PM by Berdhuis.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Harry Tuttle ()
Date: September 14, 2009 04:05PM

Berdhuis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Harry Tuttle Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > "Cyclists" please....
>
> Okay.

Thank you

> > Stay the fuck out of the road!
>
> No.

Please to be explaining why not?

>
> > You aren't cars!
>
> Yes.

Yes you aren't cars? Or yes you are cars?

>
> > I will honk at each and every one of you!
>
> Thank you.

No, the pleasure is all mine, thank YOU!

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 14, 2009 04:34PM

Berdhuis is the same kind of dickhead that bitches out the kid in Starbucks when he takes too long to make a half-caf caramel macchiato with extra cream and not too much foam.

Bike-riding cocksicles are the most self-righteous assholes I've ever met.

"Training for an important event." Seriously, where do they come up with this stuff? If it's not the Tour de France, NOBODY CARES. If it IS the Tour de France, the only people that care are other bike-riding bone smugglers.

So really, NOBODY CARES. GET OUT OF THE ROAD.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 14, 2009 07:38PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Berdhuis is the same kind of dickhead that bitches
> out the kid in Starbucks when he takes too long to
> make a half-caf caramel macchiato with extra cream
> and not too much foam.

Berdhuis (B) is the same kind of (=) dickhead (d) that bitches out (x) the kid in Starbucks (k) when he takes too long (2t) to make (x) a half caf caramel macciato with extra cream and not too much foam (.5c+2c-f)

B = (d)x(k)
k = (2t)x(.5c+2c-f)

B = (d)x[(2t)(2.5c-f)]
t = 1 min.

B = (d)x(5c-2f)
d = B/(5c-2f)
d = [(d)x(k)]/(5c-2f)
1 = k/(5c-2f)
k = 5c-2f

More simply, what you meant to say was that the kid makes lot of cream with half the foam.



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 09/14/2009 09:54PM by Berdhuis.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 14, 2009 10:55PM

Yeah, and 2 + 2 = you're an inconsiderate, self-serving prick.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 10:14AM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Yeah, and 2 + 2 = you're an inconsiderate,
> self-serving prick.

Yeah (Y), and 2 + 2 = you're an inconsiderate (i), self-serving (s) prick (p).

If Y, then 2+2 = i(sp)
4 = i(sp)
p = 4/is

More simply, you meant to say: yeah, my prick is inversely inconsiderate and self-serving by a factor of 4.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 09/15/2009 10:16AM by Berdhuis.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 11:01AM

You must be a ton of fun at parties. Bicycles, spandex, and math? I can only imagine what a riot you must be when you get half a bottle of Mike's Hard Lemonade in you.

You can try all you want to assert your intellectual superiority over me by breaking down my statements into math equations, but it still does not change the fact that you are stupid enough to spend money on spandex to protect yourself from "micro-impacts" after "several hours of bike riding."

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Enough Already ()
Date: September 15, 2009 11:07AM

Both of you shut the fuck up. This thread is about Lawyers Road, not some faggot biker and his argument with a failed freak rat loving singer.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 11:40AM

While riding on Lawyers Road, I've put almost 2000 miles on my carbon fiber-laced tires over the past 6 months, and have had no flats. Terrain I've been on ranges from smooth pavement, harsh pavement, and hard gravel for several miles - a good range. The pavement I ride on mostly has moderate to significant debris - pebbles to glass; the tires just pop them out from underneath to the side - occasionally banging the cars to my left side.

They're very resilient, and I love hearing the popping sound of pebbles being shot from underneath.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: bloody blisters ()
Date: September 15, 2009 11:43AM

is your water bottle filled with sports drink for that extra boost or is it just plain water?

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:00PM

bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> is your water bottle filled with sports drink for
> that extra boost or is it just plain water?

Just water, bloody blisters. Here's what I do: I fill the bottles the night before a long, hot day on the bike, and stow them in the freezer. Next morning they're just ice. As I ride, the ice slowly melts into cold water - waiting to reach my thirsty tongue after a couple of hours.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:07PM

Enough Already Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> freak rat loving singer.

I'll be completely honest with you; I am very proud that this is the absolute worst personal insult you idiots can come up with.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:14PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'll be completely honest with you; I am very
> proud that this is the absolute worst personal
> insult you idiots can come up with.

No doubt. That's because the manner in which you insult yourself is unbeatable.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:19PM

Berdhuis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I'll be completely honest with you; I am very
> > proud that this is the absolute worst personal
> > insult you idiots can come up with.
>
> No doubt. That's because the manner in which you
> insult yourself is unbeatable.

Well, if you can't laugh at yourself...

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: bloody blisters ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:20PM

Berdhuis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> bloody blisters Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > is your water bottle filled with sports drink
> for
> > that extra boost or is it just plain water?
>
> Just water, bloody blisters. Here's what I do: I
> fill the bottles the night before a long, hot day
> on the bike, and stow them in the freezer. Next
> morning they're just ice. As I ride, the ice
> slowly melts into cold water - waiting to reach my
> thirsty tongue after a couple of hours.


you are robbing your body of the proper amount of electrolytes. you could get much more horsepower if a) drink sports drink, or b) use castrol GTX. just plain water doesnt cut it. performance sludge can happen to you.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:26PM

bloody blisters Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> you are robbing your body of the proper amount of
> electrolytes. you could get much more horsepower
> if a) drink sports drink, or b) use castrol GTX.
> just plain water doesnt cut it. performance sludge
> can happen to you.

Which sports drink do you recommend for use on Lawyers Road?

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: bloody blisters ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:31PM

hhmmm. for Lawyers Rd. i would recommend a mixture of gatorade and vitamin water. but any other road i would stay away from that mixture.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:44PM

I second the suggestion of using Castrol GTX. Your spandex is powerless against viscosity breakdown.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:47PM

For such a rigorous regimen, I recommend Booty Sweat.



.
Attachments:
booty.jpg

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:56PM

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I second the suggestion of using Castrol GTX.
> Your spandex is powerless against viscosity
> breakdown.

The first constructive and somewhat accurate post regarding cycling from you - yes, viscosity breakdown in the crotch of the shorts will cause significant chafing on the inner thighs over several hours of riding.

That's why some (many?) of us use 'chamois butter'. It is a cream that, when applied liberally in the crotch, will lubricate those areas and prevent chafing.

Very good postulation, MrMephisto.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: September 15, 2009 12:58PM

2832978297_30575c6854.jpgBlessed are the murderous.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: September 15, 2009 01:01PM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>

Thank you, Vanna.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 01:02PM

Berdhuis Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I second the suggestion of using Castrol GTX.
> > Your spandex is powerless against viscosity
> > breakdown.
>
> The first constructive and somewhat accurate post
> regarding cycling from you - yes, viscosity
> breakdown in the crotch of the shorts will cause
> significant chafing on the inner thighs over
> several hours of riding.
>
> That's why some (many?) of us use 'chamois
> butter'. It is a cream that, when applied
> liberally in the crotch, will lubricate those
> areas and prevent chafing.
>
> Very good postulation, MrMephisto.

My inner thighs chafe from rubbing together when I walk; can chamois butter help me with my fat-related problems?

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: bloody blisters ()
Date: September 15, 2009 01:05PM

i would like to buy a vowel. yes?

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: eesh ()
Date: September 15, 2009 01:06PM

Can chamois butter help with my pissing problem? It feels like razor blades are coming out every time I take a piss.

Blessed are the murderous.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: bloody blisters ()
Date: September 15, 2009 01:14PM

i would like to vuy another bowel. no?

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 02:41PM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Can chamois butter help with my pissing problem?
> It feels like razor blades are coming out every
> time I take a piss.

That's not chafing, that's gonorrhea.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Catholics don't lie ()
Date: September 15, 2009 02:50PM

Gonorrhea is fucking disgusting but not as bad as a septum piercing. Just look at the dangers:



Septal piercings usually are performed in the inferior fleshy part of the septum and not through cartilaginous tissue. Piercing the cartilage can cause significant bleeding and lead to septal hematoma formation that often is accompanied by infection. Other potential complications that may result in cosmetic deformity include perichondritis and necrosis of the cartilaginous nasal wall. Infection requires aggressive treatment with antibiotics that have good coverage against Staphylococcus species that commonly colonize the nasal mucosa. Mupirocin is effective and offers excellent coverage against gram-positive cocci. Fluoroquinolones have the advantage of excellent skin penetration and added coverage against Pseudomonas species.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: MrMephisto ()
Date: September 15, 2009 03:02PM

Catholics don't lie Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Gonorrhea is fucking disgusting but not as bad as
> a septum piercing. Just look at the dangers:
>
>
>
> Septal piercings usually are performed in the
> inferior fleshy part of the septum and not through
> cartilaginous tissue. Piercing the cartilage can
> cause significant bleeding and lead to septal
> hematoma formation that often is accompanied by
> infection. Other potential complications that may
> result in cosmetic deformity include
> perichondritis and necrosis of the cartilaginous
> nasal wall. Infection requires aggressive
> treatment with antibiotics that have good coverage
> against Staphylococcus species that commonly
> colonize the nasal mucosa. Mupirocin is effective
> and offers excellent coverage against
> gram-positive cocci. Fluoroquinolones have the
> advantage of excellent skin penetration and added
> coverage against Pseudomonas species.

You're 100% correct. Pussies should not get a septum piercing under any circumstances.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: :(- ()
Date: July 03, 2015 08:47AM

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Can chamois butter help with my pissing problem?
> It feels like razor blades are coming out every
> time I take a piss.


Y

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Re: Let the Accidents Begin - 4 Lane Lawyers Rd Shrunk to One Lane
Posted by: Berdhuis ()
Date: July 03, 2015 02:03PM

:(- Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Can chamois butter help with my pissing
> problem?
> > It feels like razor blades are coming out every
> > time I take a piss.
>
>
> Y

He's not wearing spandex while riding on Lawyer's Road, that's why.

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