Kids of Helicopter Parents Are Sputtering Out

Recent studies suggests that kids with overinvolved parents and rigidly structured childhoods suffer psychological blowback in college.

By Julie Lythcott-Haims


http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2015/07/helicopter_parenting_is_increasingly_correlated_with_college_age_depression.html

news flash - everything a parent does creates psychological blowback. The fact that the author qualifies that with the final words 'in college.' says it all. If you love your kid and have supported him financially emotionally and spiritually they are lucky enough to have problems 'in college.' Most likely in a good college.

So let your kid fuck-off, have no idea what they do all day and you will surely be parent of the year to a child grown to be a worker at McDonalds or a Walmart greeter.

geez what a crock of shit.

Thank you! I'm so tired of libtards making me feel guilty for giving a shit all these years. My kid had a rough start at first, but got the hang of college life soon enough...at UVa...thank you.

Heliyeah Wrote:
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> Thank you! I'm so tired of libtards making me
> feel guilty for giving a shit all these years. My
> kid had a rough start at first, but got the hang
> of college life soon enough...at UVa...thank you.


libtards are not making you feel guilty By the way , nobody cares where your kid goes to college. You feel guilty because no matter what you do their is an article saying its its the parents fault. You can't win its not a liberal/conservative thing. Its both sides .

Heliyeah Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Thank you! I'm so tired of libtards making me
> feel guilty for giving a shit all these years. My
> kid had a rough start at first, but got the hang
> of college life soon enough...at UVa...thank you.

How did she enjoy the rape?

24 of 29 people found the following review helpful

1Only relevant to "One Percenters"
Bynotsonewmomon June 28, 2015
This entire book was geared toward "One Percenters" and really not relevant to the rest of us. 90% of her anecdotal examples come from children at elite private/public prep schools and ivy league universities. She cites an example of why it can be good for kids to end up at "lower" rung Ivies like Cornell because it is so humbling and makes the graduates feel less entitled in their later lives. WHAT?!? In this day and age - how many people can even dream about sending their kids to Cornell - no matter how talented they are individually? Who is she writing for?

Full disclaimer - Im liberal on most issues. That said the woman who wrote this book/article is a real POS. She is concerned about all the kids at Stanford not being mature. Stanford. Really? All we ask is absolute perfection of those 18 year olds. I am sure its all parents in general not just those so obsessed or with such amazingly gifted kids that they get into Stanford. So kids get into Stanford and are depressed boo friking hoo. I dont suppose it could have anything to do with landing in a university the lowest acceptance rate in the US. Stanford admitted 2,138 students to the Class of 2018 in this year’s admissions cycle, producing – at 5.07 percent – the lowest admit rate in University history. The University received a total of 42,167 applications this year, a record total and a 8.6 percent increase over last year’s figure of 38,828

And the helicopter parents are to blame. Christ can you do anything right as a parent. Your kid gets into Stanford and you have ruined their lives because you cared too much.

BTW this woman is a lawyer by training not a psychologist. Her insight as a Dean is not clinically qualified. That and everyone in her department hated her guts. Also she needed Dr. Phil and Oprah (not a joke) to help her lose the weight she gained because she was stressed over the fact her workmates despised her.

"Recent studies suggests that kids with overinvolved parents and rigidly structured childhoods suffer psychological blowback in college."

My parents weren't "helicopter" types by any means and always stressed self reliance. When I started college I noticed there were other freshmen who had never been around much because their parents ruled their lives since day one and controlled virtually aspect of their activities. Choose their friends for them?
Yep. Choose their major for them? Yep. When Little Junior gets to college he rebels and he's the one you see puking his guts out at the local pub because he'd
never had a beer before and now he's learning not to drink an entire pitcher on an empty stomach. Little Junior's next move is to barely pass or flunk out in the first semester because now he's free and doesn't give a shit. If he passes, the
next phase is to change majors every other semester. When he finally gets his
pink slip he goes home and blames it all on the faculty. Okay, lets try another
college. Oops! This one isn't so good after all. Too hard to find good weed and
it's too far away from civilization.

I remember these kids. Shall I continue?

Well one thing I do know about over protective parents is that they love themself more than their children because they are controlling their children to Ease their own discomfort or paranoid thoughts, Ignoring their Childrens lack of happiness in the progress. You can protect your children from everything but who is going to protect them from you? and the mental illness and depression you are inflicting upon them? and also be the reason your son or daughter will mature very late? It's not your job to protect children,but It's your job to teach them how to protect themself.

BeenSayingItForYears Wrote:
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> Kids of Helicopter Parents Are Sputtering Out
>
> Recent studies suggests that kids with
> overinvolved parents and rigidly structured
> childhoods suffer psychological blowback in
> college.
>
> By Julie Lythcott-Haims
>
>
> http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/201
> 5/07/helicopter_parenting_is_increasingly_correlat
> ed_with_college_age_depression.html


They turn into crybullies:
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I was raised with almost no parental involvement. My father was a gambling, womanizing alcoholic who physically abused everyone in the family and who ended up, thankfully, abandoning the family so my brother and I did not have to deal with him any longer. My mother was a chronically unemployed alcoholic who slept in depression all day. She was really an absent parent, and I got most of my meals and care from a teammate's parent and a girlfriend who I fell very hard for.

Yet my brother and I still had a pretty good childhood. We had fun. We were among the very best in the nation in our sport, and attended college on athletic scholarships and graduate school on fellowships and awards. The reason why we were relatively happy is that we had no helicopter parents around (in fact, we had almost no parental guidance) to screw things up. I do have regrets some times at the somewhat mediocre job my brother and I did raising each other, but heck, we had an incredible amount of freedom, and were thus permitted to take incredible risks, from the age of 13. I might add that my brother and I for some reason never had any interest in drugs or alcohol, so that may have made us unusual, but we still were terrifically attracted to women our age, and certainly skirted disaster in this area. I look back on my youth with a smile, even with the young women who burned me (in as sense), as heck, I would do it all over again. Poverty was no fun, but when you are age 20, poverty is only a state of mind and I could see a future.

Put it this way, I cringe when I see helicopter parents, as these poor kids will never have the freedom to recover from their own mistakes, live on the edge, or take risks which can lead to great success. I am often perplexed at the fear and anxiety people have in the work environment, not being sensitive enough to the fact that very few people had the privilege in which to develop an almost complete lack of fear and self reliance such as my brother and I did.

My own offspring are successful and happy, with an impressive list of accomplishments. I helicoptered a bit (a human condition), and regret doing so. If I had to do it again, I would have even more faith in my kids' abilities.

I hope my perspective is shared.

Right on man. Good on you.

Im in high school and all the kids with helicopter parents are kinda snobby. My parents are more protective than some and they actually put some restrictions on me but they arent insane and I think it's good for kids to be allowed to make mistakes in life.

bT4DH

stupid no ...

their offspring are numerous and sure to get better grades for the same material turned in !
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smart enought to order that from china using credit "i'm sure he'll repay"

not smart enought to enjoy the very limited time he has to enjoy a remote nature area while he's there ? bet he forgot to bring his girlfriend.
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You are either a helicopter parent or a free-range parent, and someone will complain about you either way.