Fairfax County General :
Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
McStuck
()
Date: January 27, 2015 01:46AM
Sitting on the john in my basement and out of no where a log with about a 6 inch diameter starts making its way out and is now in a stalemate with me...I'm pushing as hard as I can but she won't budge. I'm afraid if I clock the tail off the rest will stat stuck inside me. I knew I shouldn't have tried McDs new triple cheeseburger... Any ideas? My wife called a medic
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
i no
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:08AM
Next time eat at Tippy's
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
nursewretched
()
Date: January 27, 2015 12:33PM
Buy ye a box of non-latex exam gloves. Put glove on your feces mining hand.
Liberate what needs liberating with your index finger.
Flush that statist progressive down.
Throw away glove.
Wash hands.
Hydrate yourself better.
Liberate what needs liberating with your index finger.
Flush that statist progressive down.
Throw away glove.
Wash hands.
Hydrate yourself better.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
Austin Powwow
()
Date: January 27, 2015 12:58PM
Let that turd know who's boss!
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
nursewretched rox
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:14PM
nursewretched Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Buy ye a box of non-latex exam gloves. Put glove
> on your feces mining hand.
> Liberate what needs liberating with your index
> finger.
> Flush that statist progressive down.
> Throw away glove.
> Wash hands.
>
> Hydrate yourself better.
nursewretched is my hero, well said!
-------------------------------------------------------
> Buy ye a box of non-latex exam gloves. Put glove
> on your feces mining hand.
> Liberate what needs liberating with your index
> finger.
> Flush that statist progressive down.
> Throw away glove.
> Wash hands.
>
> Hydrate yourself better.
nursewretched is my hero, well said!
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
vintner
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:25PM
A corkscrew, my man.
Just screw it into the turd and pull. Just like opening a bottle of fine wine.
Just screw it into the turd and pull. Just like opening a bottle of fine wine.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
YPGY4
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:43PM
Whatever you do, do not attempt to self evacuate. Wait for Metro to rescue you.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
Crack Plumber
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:51PM
Call Roto-Rooter ASAP.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
no worries
()
Date: January 27, 2015 02:55PM
Just put on a nice pair of industrial strength Hefty bag undies and feel free to go about your day. No need to let something like that slow you down! Eventually it too shall pass.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
TurdyBird
()
Date: January 28, 2015 09:54AM
McStuck Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sitting on the john in my basement and out of no
> where a log with about a 6 inch diameter starts
> making its way out and is now in a stalemate with
> me...I'm pushing as hard as I can but she won't
> budge. I'm afraid if I clock the tail off the rest
> will stat stuck inside me. I knew I shouldn't have
> tried McDs new triple cheeseburger... Any ideas?
> My wife called a medic
You're calling the turd a 'she'? A bit sexist, don't you think? Fecal matter always reflects the sex of its owner.
-------------------------------------------------------
> Sitting on the john in my basement and out of no
> where a log with about a 6 inch diameter starts
> making its way out and is now in a stalemate with
> me...I'm pushing as hard as I can but she won't
> budge. I'm afraid if I clock the tail off the rest
> will stat stuck inside me. I knew I shouldn't have
> tried McDs new triple cheeseburger... Any ideas?
> My wife called a medic
You're calling the turd a 'she'? A bit sexist, don't you think? Fecal matter always reflects the sex of its owner.
Re: medical emergency in my house! what to do??
Posted by:
a666o
()
Date: January 29, 2015 10:30AM
nursewretched Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Put glove on your feces mining hand.
LMAO!
-------------------------------------------------------
> Put glove on your feces mining hand.
LMAO!