Saw a linkedin profile for a "Talent Delivery Specialist." Turns out, it's just a human resources generalist. What is wrong with saying "I work in human resources"?


Then there are those that attach "engineer" to their job title/description, even though they no education or experience in actual engineering....


"Mission Assurance Director" A senior manager that does some bullshit business continuity job. Very big in the defense industry.


"Nightlife Consultant" A hedonist douchebag that listens exclusively to techno and advises owners of clubs and restaurants on things they could have figured out themselves.

Just because your title is "Junior Cashier" doesn't mean you need to hate on other people's titles.

Quality control specialist.

"Homeless and Rehab Facilitator" sounds better than drug dealer on a resume...

"MTurker".

It's what people who work on Amazon's Mechanical Turk microwork Web site call themselves.

fuck liberals Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Because headhunter, which is what she really is,
> sounds a little off-putting. Liberals consider
> "Human Resources" to not be politically correct
> terminology, since it reinforces the dehumanizing
> stigma that employees are commodities to be
> manipulated by corporations.

Are employees commodities? I think they're more like leased capital equipment.

From Wiktionary-

Any single asset which has an acquisition cost of $5,000 or more and a useful life of more than one year, whether purchased outright, acquired through a capital lease or through donation. It also includes certain constructed or fabricated items and certain component parts.

In a modern corporation, despite all the happy smoke the managment may blow up your ass about the business being a "team" or, even more nauseatingly, a "family", you really are nothing more than a component, a cog in the machine.

Any self-employed person who uses the term "Promoter" in their title.

fuck liberals Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Because headhunter, which is what she really is,
> sounds a little off-putting. Liberals consider
> "Human Resources" to not be politically correct
> terminology, since it reinforces the dehumanizing
> stigma that employees are commodities to be
> manipulated by corporations.


What? Where do you even come up with these things?

Anyone with the word "solution" in the title.

Of course, I prefer "Custodial Technician" or "Sanitation and Hygene Specialist" or "Workspace Beautification Journeyman" over "janitor." I think it brings an air of class to plunging a toilet.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

justsayin Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Anyone with the word "solution" in the title.

So, synthesizing the past several posts, "Promotionial Solutions Consultant" would be one of the more bullshit titles one could have?

Yeah that would be one, but sadly it sounds totally like something you would see!

Pee Ess See Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> So, synthesizing the past several posts,
> "Promotionial Solutions Consultant" would be one
> of the more bullshit titles one could have?


Yeah that would be one, but sadly it sounds totally like something you would see!

Talent Delivery Specialist

sangwich artist is the guy (or ugly girl) making your shit pile at Subway. Didnt know my sub was made by an artist, I would have paid double.

Interoffice Media Technician = Push cart messenger

I love a good sangwich.

strandon Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> sangwich artist is the guy (or ugly girl) making
> your shit pile at Subway. Didnt know my sub was
> made by an artist, I would have paid double.

Kumquat Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I love a good sangwich.
>
> strandon Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > sangwich artist is the guy (or ugly girl)
> making
> > your shit pile at Subway. Didnt know my sub was
> > made by an artist, I would have paid double.



http://youtu.be/RkBiQOYgNVk
dont you watch comedy central

fuck liberals Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Saw a linkedin profile for a "Talent Delivery
> > Specialist." Turns out, it's just a human
> > resources generalist. What is wrong with saying
> "I
> > work in human resources"?
> >
> >
> >
>
> Because headhunter, which is what she really is,
> sounds a little off-putting. Liberals consider
> "Human Resources" to not be politically correct
> terminology, since it reinforces the dehumanizing
> stigma that employees are commodities to be
> manipulated by corporations.





Actually, headhunter is usually a different position and department than human resources, and they can just be called recruiters. This Talent Delivery Specialist was specifically the company's new term for a generalist in human resources.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/13/2012 02:18PM by eesh.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Of course, I prefer "Custodial Technician" or
> "Sanitation and Hygene Specialist" or "Workspace
> Beautification Journeyman" over "janitor." I think
> it brings an air of class to plunging a toilet.




I used to visit this hospital where the janitors were called environmental engineers. I hope they got paid more.

Alternative lifesytle specialist - fag

strandon Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> sangwich artist is the guy (or ugly girl) making
> your shit pile at Subway. Didnt know my sub was
> made by an artist, I would have paid double.





Barista at coffee houses is way too fancy of name for a minimum wage job.

Nail Tech
Pet waste management specialist
job coach
pool manager/supervisor

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> fuck liberals Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > eesh Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > Saw a linkedin profile for a "Talent Delivery
> > > Specialist." Turns out, it's just a human
> > > resources generalist. What is wrong with
> saying
> > "I
> > > work in human resources"?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> >
> > Because headhunter, which is what she really
> is,
> > sounds a little off-putting. Liberals consider
> > "Human Resources" to not be politically correct
> > terminology, since it reinforces the
> dehumanizing
> > stigma that employees are commodities to be
> > manipulated by corporations.
>
>
>
>
>
> Actually, headhunter is usually a different
> position and department than human resources, and
> they can just be called recruiters. This Talent
> Delivery Specialist was specifically the company's
> new term for a generalist in human resources.

Save a few Fortune 100 companies that may have a VP of Recruiting, recruiters fall under HR on most org charts.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> "Mission Assurance Director" A senior manager that
> does some bullshit business continuity job. Very
> big in the defense industry.

Business continuity is no bullshit. It's big in defense and elsewhere for a reason. Never heard it called mission assurance but whatever. Agree with the rest.

JBass Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Save a few Fortune 100 companies that may have a
> VP of Recruiting, recruiters fall under HR on most
> org charts.




You don't know what you are talking about.


While there are some companies that use their human resources department to handle recruiting, most large companies have dedicated, full time recruiters that work independently.

Matter of fact, the trend has been to outsource recruiting to an independent contractor, who only answers to managers charged with hiring.

More Complete Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> Business continuity is no bullshit. It's big in
> defense and elsewhere for a reason. Never heard it
> called mission assurance but whatever. Agree with
> the rest.




It doesn't need to be a full time job, especially on a senior management level. Similar thing with an ethics department, so many defense contractors have a full time ethics department that rarely has a full day's load of work.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It doesn't need to be a full time job, especially
> on a senior management level. Similar thing with
> an ethics department, so many defense contractors
> have a full time ethics department that rarely has
> a full day's load of work.

Depends on the "mission". Ethics? That should take all of about one day a year. Here, sign this. Done.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> JBass Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > Save a few Fortune 100 companies that may have
> a
> > VP of Recruiting, recruiters fall under HR on
> most
> > org charts.
>
>
>
>
> You don't know what you are talking about.
>
>
> While there are some companies that use their
> human resources department to handle recruiting,
> most large companies have dedicated, full time
> recruiters that work independently.
>
> Matter of fact, the trend has been to outsource
> recruiting to an independent contractor, who only
> answers to managers charged with hiring.


God damn I hate you. Let me spell this out for you feeble mind...

Virtually every company in business today operates under a chain of command. You should remember this from your pre-epts days in the service. Very Large companies, CACI, for example have a VP of Recruiting. They truly are their own department. Most other companies have a recruiting team that may go up to a manager or director level. You dont actually think these managers and directors report directly to the CEO, do you? Typically, recruiters do indeed work on their own team, but they are under a HR manager, VP or Chief HR officer.

Recruiting is an HR function, down to its very core.

JBass Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> God damn I hate you. Let me spell this out for
> you feeble mind...
>
> Virtually every company in business today operates
> under a chain of command. You should remember
> this from your pre-epts days in the service. Very
> Large companies, CACI, for example have a VP of
> Recruiting. They truly are their own department.
> Most other companies have a recruiting team that
> may go up to a manager or director level. You
> dont actually think these managers and directors
> report directly to the CEO, do you? Typically,
> recruiters do indeed work on their own team, but
> they are under a HR manager, VP or Chief HR
> officer.
>
> Recruiting is an HR function, down to its very
> core.





You really don't know what you are talking about, and it looks like you re-wrote some article from another website.

Oh, and please don't preach to me about organizational management.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> JBass Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > God damn I hate you. Let me spell this out for
> > you feeble mind...
> >
> > Virtually every company in business today
> operates
> > under a chain of command. You should remember
> > this from your pre-epts days in the service.
> Very
> > Large companies, CACI, for example have a VP of
> > Recruiting. They truly are their own
> department.
> > Most other companies have a recruiting team
> that
> > may go up to a manager or director level. You
> > dont actually think these managers and
> directors
> > report directly to the CEO, do you? Typically,
> > recruiters do indeed work on their own team,
> but
> > they are under a HR manager, VP or Chief HR
> > officer.
> >
> > Recruiting is an HR function, down to its very
> > core.
>
>
>
>
>
> You really don't know what you are talking about,
> and it looks like you re-wrote some article from
> another website.

Re-wrote an article? I dont understand what you mean.

>
> Oh, and please don't preach to me about
> organizational management.

I wasnt preaching anything. I was explaining simple corporate structure to a simple man.

I have to assume you are trolling, though. Because you cant really be so fucking stupid as to think that recruiting is not a HR function.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> JBass Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > God damn I hate you. Let me spell this out for
> > you feeble mind...
> >
> > Virtually every company in business today
> operates
> > under a chain of command. You should remember
> > this from your pre-epts days in the service.
> Very
> > Large companies, CACI, for example have a VP of
> > Recruiting. They truly are their own
> department.
> > Most other companies have a recruiting team
> that
> > may go up to a manager or director level. You
> > dont actually think these managers and
> directors
> > report directly to the CEO, do you? Typically,
> > recruiters do indeed work on their own team,
> but
> > they are under a HR manager, VP or Chief HR
> > officer.
> >
> > Recruiting is an HR function, down to its very
> > core.
>
>
>
>
>
> You really don't know what you are talking about,
> and it looks like you re-wrote some article from
> another website.
>
> Oh, and please don't preach to me about
> organizational management.


Dont know what Im talking about?

Things I stated that are facts.

1) Some companies have VPs of Recruiting or a Chief Recruiting Officer
2) Companies operate under a chain of command
3) Directors/Managers do not report directly to a CEO
4) Recruiters work on a team
5) Recruiters typically fall under HR
6) You are a fucking moron

JBass Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------

> I was explaining simple corporate structure



Corporate structure is organizational management. Various industries have different approaches to management, so your simplistic, cookie cutter approach to answering my posts is not good enough.




> I have to assume you are trolling, though.
> Because you cant really be so fucking stupid as to
> think that recruiting is not a HR function.


As I said, in some companies, recruiting is a part of human resources, but most large companies have a dedicated recruiter(s) that do not work within human resources. Human resources covers a variety of issues, recruiting isn't typically the central focus.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> JBass Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
>
> > I was explaining simple corporate structure
>
>
>
> Corporate structure is organizational management.
> Various industries have different approaches to
> management, so your simplistic, cookie cutter
> approach to answering my posts is not good
> enough.
>
>
Okay, name an example of a for-profit company that does not operate under a chain of command. Simplistic is okay if it accurately depicts the subject matter.

>
>
> > I have to assume you are trolling, though.
> > Because you cant really be so fucking stupid as
> to
> > think that recruiting is not a HR function.
>
>
> As I said, in some companies, recruiting is a part
> of human resources, but most large companies have
> a dedicated recruiter(s) that do not work within
> human resources. Human resources covers a variety
> of issues, recruiting isn't typically the central
> focus.

You have it backwards.... In MOST companies, recruiting is a part of HR. But in SOME large companies there are recruiters who do not operate under HR.. Anyhow thats not what you said that I originally refuted.

So kill yourself after reading a lil excerpt from ERE, one of the largest recruiting organizations in the nation. I was at their conference in San Diego in March... met hella HR folks.

http://www.ere.net/2011/10/19/why-corporate-recruiting-departments-sometimes-struggle/

"Distractions – Corporate recruiters are tasked with a lot more than just recruiting. They may be pulled into overflow HR “stuff” (employee relations, open enrollment, compensation studies, etc.) that takes time away from their core responsibility. As long as corporate recruiters are tied to the HR function, they will be pulled in as HR pinch hitters."

We’ve not been able to provide enough on the value proposition side to say “leave us alone” when it comes to HR distractions.

I’m not completely sold that recruiting should be rolled into HR at all.

About.com, not a great reference, but it goes to my point
http://humanresources.about.com/od/jobdescriptions/a/HR_recruiter.htm
The Corporate Human Resources Recruiter is responsible for delivering all facets of recruiting success throughout the organization.

Look at the bottom of this page under "Jobs in HR"
http://www.michaelpage.com/content/203-human-resources-recruitment.html

"Campus Recruiter"

Here is an HR focused site that has a page dedicated to the role of recruiting in HR
http://hr.blr.com/HR-news/Staffing-Training/Recruiting/92-employers-recruiting-through-social-media-surve/


Thanks for the troll, though. Its been a while. How they hangin?

Why is it I am reminded of the whole desert topping/furniture finish skit.

I'll take your silence as a concession

I'm very sorry JBass, but the ability to Google an answer to my posts does not make you more knowledgeable. It's very clear that you have limited experience and an even more limited understanding of corporate environments, or anywhere with a hierarchy.

Can we please get back to the original topic, and not argue over your insistence to believe recruiting is the primary mission of HR?

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I'm very sorry JBass, but the ability to Google an
> answer to my posts does not make you more
> knowledgeable. It's very clear that you have
> limited experience and an even more limited
> understanding of corporate environments, or
> anywhere with a hierarchy.
>
> Can we please get back to the original topic, and
> not argue over your insistence to believe
> recruiting is the primary mission of HR?


Haha, You take the cake man. Flat out lying through your teeth in the face of factual defeat. Thanks eesh!

Also, when did I ever, anywhere, say that recruiting is the primary function of HR. I simply said its a function.

You do know the more you divert the better it makes your opponent look, right? Im sparkling like the Teflon Don over here.

I love this JBass/eesh interplay! Never gets old.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I used to visit this hospital where the janitors
> were called environmental engineers. I hope they
> got paid more.

Awesome.

In all seriousness, though, they might have had more responsibilities than just cleaning; painting, drywall repair, and other simple building maintenance-type things that janitors typically don't do.

I would also think a janitor at a hospital would be paid more than a janitor at other places, considering how important cleanliness is to medicine.

--------------------------------------------------------------
13 4826 0948 82695 25847. Yes.

MrMephisto Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> eesh Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I used to visit this hospital where the
> janitors
> > were called environmental engineers. I hope
> they
> > got paid more.
>
> Awesome.
>
> In all seriousness, though, they might have had
> more responsibilities than just cleaning;
> painting, drywall repair, and other simple
> building maintenance-type things that janitors
> typically don't do.
>

That's an insult to those who are real engineers.

Community organizer

BS title here in Fairfax.

I've seen garbage men called "sanitation engineers".

People in retail are often called "associates" or something similar. I was a stock boy at a Kmart when I was a teenager. I have to sit in and watch training videos and they kept referring to us as associates. Made me feel like I was really special and part of the team. I'll always cherish my time making min wage at Kmart.

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> MrMephisto Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Of course, I prefer "Custodial Technician" or
> > "Sanitation and Hygene Specialist" or
> "Workspace
> > Beautification Journeyman" over "janitor." I
> think
> > it brings an air of class to plunging a toilet.
>
>
>
>
> I used to visit this hospital where the janitors
> were called environmental engineers. I hope they
> got paid more.
Attachments:

Despite the flame war above...

Any euphemism for the word "recruiter" that is applied to someone not working as a salaried employee of the company that has the job openings.

Talent Acquisition Specialist... all the bullshit terms like that.

Their title is even more bullshit because they're just some tool working out of their bedroom/den blindly gathering barely-relevant resumes, then upselling them like used car salesmen in hopes of getting some employer to pay. They have no idea how to read technical qualifications and they care little about meeting the candidate's needs.

I get emails from them all the time. Some of dem rd liek txt msgs so if u want da job email me ur rez... for six-figure jobs. In the rare cases where the job is relevant, I just google their description because they could only copy it verbatim from where ever they found it. The few I have contacted try to lower my salary requirements while having no idea what they're selling.

fools.

Today's society(or lack of it),the majority of people need titles to prove their worthless existence. Job status, materialism and comforts to feel that they are somebody and have accomplished their hierarchy in society. The few that are behind the scenes and enjoying this great joke are having the most fun.
Wearing a suit, kissing ass, or wrapping your lips around penis might get you thru the hour but...
I need a vacation

Yeah baby!
Attachments:

I never liked "associate." It implies some egalitarian structure to an organization that actually isn't there. An "associate" who hands out food at a drive-thru window is not on par with an "associate" who manages investor relations for the same company. Let's call hourly employees hourly employees and stop with the word games.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

PTE number 1 Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Yeah baby!


I pumped gas at a full service station for a summer when I was a teen. I think the position was called "Fuel Attendant".

It was an awful job, but at least we didn't have to wear a ridiculous uniform like in that picture.

3 guys to service every car that pulls in for gas

I like the gas stations in Jersey where they are all full-service and the attendants all look like members of the Gambino family. If Chris Christie is for real, he'd end that nonsense.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I like the gas stations in Jersey where they are
> all full-service and the attendants all look like
> members of the Gambino family. If Chris Christie
> is for real, he'd end that nonsense.


The first time I ever went to AC with my wife (then girlfriend), I got out to pump gas and some kid said "no, I have to do that". And I was like "nah man, I got it". Then he said "no, you dont understand, I HAVE to". I was a little confused for a second.

I asked some friend who lives in jersey what it's all about and he said it just about jobs, as shitty as they are.

__________________________________
That's not a ladybug, that's a cannapiller.

It's a good way to get friends and family green cards since nobody wants those jobs.

First the gas pump thing and then you cannot buy beer or booze at a normal store. You need to run around to three different places.

Plus many restaurants you need to bring your own booze.

Strange.

Jersey is weird Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> First the gas pump thing and then you cannot buy
> beer or booze at a normal store. You need to run
> around to three different places.
>
> Plus many restaurants you need to bring your own
> booze.
>
> Strange.


First time I went to Cape May, I tried to find a restaurant that let you buy beer. They all had an hour-long wait while a bunch of restaurants without licenses were virtually vacant. I didn't need a beer bad enough to wait an hour.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
http://bible.cc/1_corinthians/13-11.htm

WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> I never liked "associate." It implies some
> egalitarian structure to an organization that
> actually isn't there. An "associate" who hands out
> food at a drive-thru window is not on par with an
> "associate" who manages investor relations for the
> same company. Let's call hourly employees hourly
> employees and stop with the word games.





When I was walking around that Gaylord hotel in Maryland I kept seeing signs on doors "Stars only". Turns out all the hotel employees from housekeeper to manager were referred only as stars.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/14/2012 02:19PM by eesh.

wnrsm Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Despite the flame war above...
>
> Any euphemism for the word "recruiter" that is
> applied to someone not working as a salaried
> employee of the company that has the job
> openings.
>
> Talent Acquisition Specialist... all the bullshit
> terms like that.
>
> Their title is even more bullshit because they're
> just some tool working out of their bedroom/den
> blindly gathering barely-relevant resumes, then
> upselling them like used car salesmen in hopes of
> getting some employer to pay. They have no idea
> how to read technical qualifications and they care
> little about meeting the candidate's needs.
>
> I get emails from them all the time. Some of dem
> rd liek txt msgs so if u want da job email me ur
> rez... for six-figure jobs. In the rare cases
> where the job is relevant, I just google their
> description because they could only copy it
> verbatim from where ever they found it. The few I
> have contacted try to lower my salary requirements
> while having no idea what they're selling.
>
> fools.


+1


It's worse in the DC area because of the demand for cleared employees. You will have recruiters trying to fill positions with people whose sole qualification is their security clearance.

The recruiters especially like targeting people just about to get out of the military, they don't negotiate salaries like civilians that have been in the corporate world for a while.

Blessed are the murderous.

U. S. Congressman

Warhawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> WashingTone-Locian Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > I like the gas stations in Jersey where they
> are
> > all full-service and the attendants all look
> like
> > members of the Gambino family. If Chris
> Christie
> > is for real, he'd end that nonsense.
>
>
> The first time I ever went to AC with my wife
> (then girlfriend), I got out to pump gas and some
> kid said "no, I have to do that". And I was like
> "nah man, I got it". Then he said "no, you dont
> understand, I HAVE to". I was a little confused
> for a second.
>
> I asked some friend who lives in jersey what it's
> all about and he said it just about jobs, as
> shitty as they are.

It's against the law to pump your own gas in Jersey.

Not that I complain, the gas is still cheaper there than anywhere else I've been. If a bunch of mobster-looking guys wash my windshield and check my oil like it's 1965 then that's a bonus.

One time I stopped at a gas station that was owned by Russians in Jersey, Lukoil I think it was called, and this really hot Russian chick came out in a skirt and heels to pump my gas and clean my windshield! I grew up in that neighborhood and that was a bit much even for me. Not that I complained, of course. I got good scenery and it was still cheaper than anything around here.

tomahawk Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> It's against the law to pump your own gas in
> Jersey.

It's a safety hazard

eesh Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
>
> It's worse in the DC area because of the demand
> for cleared employees. You will have recruiters
> trying to fill positions with people whose sole
> qualification is their security clearance.
>
> The recruiters especially like targeting people
> just about to get out of the military, they don't
> negotiate salaries like civilians that have been
> in the corporate world for a while.

Both are very true... unfortunately.

CSB time. They re-competed the IT contract at my place and went with the lowest bidder. The winner had to fill those slots with bottom feeders for any chance to make a profit. These are not inexperienced people willing to work. They're evasive shitheads that do as little as possible.

Their job titles are things like "Senior Database Administrator" and "Senior Systems Engineer" - ugh.

I just got a new project where success requires competent timely work from them. I'm not hopeful. There's not much I can do about it except micromanage them (and likely still fail) or find another job. I think I have a good job offer coming in the next week or two. Pay rates seem to be slipping everywhere, but I'm willing to take a cut for better supported projects.

I have seen many leave the military and be completely blown away to double their enlisted pay as a contractor. They're great people to have on your team because of their structure and teamwork ethic. They're also better than I am at putting up with crap - I admire that. I have seen their stages of emotions when they figure out they were lowballed. I helped the good ones negotiate a raise or job change.

'Recruiting isnt an HR function' - eesh

tee hehe.... Good thing you are worthless, Id hate to pay the taxes on you.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 07/16/2012 12:19PM by JBass.

I was a HNIC You youngans wouldnt understand.Part of the job was dealin with BS.
Took me years and someone dieing to get the job and title. Mighty proud of my accomblishments. Pride is something missing in this country.

I worked for a company that hired a couple Engineers for the "new" Engineering department, and a few people hired as Engineering support; the R&D was backed up, so the Engineers in Engineering moved to R&D, and the Engineering support turned into Technical Engineers…now Engineers (the Engineering department now has no Engineers.) Half do not have any degree at all; the company will look real bad if any of these guys leave, and attempt to apply for a real Engineering position; “You don’t know ohm’s law?”

Toxic chemical mixer – bar tender.

Package handler specialist – stock boy.

The only real title you earn in life is on the headstone your family might
purchase with the inheritance. If you were lucky.


And you are better remembered as a son of bitch than a nice guy.

Government "Program Analyst" and "Management Analyst".

You can't spell Analyst without Anal

One trend i have noticed these days is the gross misuse of "CEO". It seems as though every independant home based business owner or self-employed contractor likes to give them self title of CEO. Eventhough its a 1 or 2 person operation and thier job actual job function comes nothing close to what a CEO does.

Go ahead and put that on a resume and apply for an actual CEO positsion and get laughted at.

I prime example is one of those nightlife consultant douches who organizes their company as an LLC and is one man operation. All of sudden they are a CEO too, amazing!

Fine Arts Program Assistant (They hang pictures on the walls that
the manager has chosen)

When I was 19 I held a particular title... "Lot Agent" = Car washer at Thrifty car rental...lmao

Biggest bullshit job titles are these two:

1. U.S. PRESIDENT
2. U.S. CONGRESSMAN/CONGRESSWOMAN

"Independent Gambling & Casinos Professional"

PLATO Wrote:
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> Biggest bullshit job titles are these two:
>
> 1. U.S. PRESIDENT
> 2. U.S. CONGRESSMAN/CONGRESSWOMAN


lol took the words out my mouth

eesh Wrote:
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> "Independent Gambling & Casinos Professional"


basically stand out on the Strip and hand out free drink coupons to passerby, and try to convince the younger ones to check out the dance club so that you can earn a cut of their cover charge

lol, I've also seen them go by "Independent Promoter"

j sandusky Wrote:
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> Alternative lifesytle specialist - fag


be real careful with that term. many of us have sex with each other in here

My favorite: "Lot Agent" = Car washer (My old job at Thrifty car rental) LMAO

You already said that six months ago mayzin.

Oh my bad...lol

how about Apothecary// wtf?

Thinkbox out.




Heroes Get Remembered. Legends Never Die.

Forum moderator

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W.W.S.D. what would Scooby Doo

Ahmayzin Wrote:
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> My favorite: "Lot Agent" = Car washer (My old
> job at Thrifty car rental) LMAO




Going along with the agent theme, "guest services agent" which is just a hotel front desk clerk.

Sounds good though...lol.