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Fairfax Underground
Welcome to Fairfax Underground, a project site designed to improve communication among residents of Fairfax County, VA. Feel free to post anything Northern Virginia residents would find interesting.
You can think me later for real analysis. The reason coach Reid’s face shield fogged up, during last nights game, was due to a combination of funnel cakes, sodas, and bowels that had seen better days. From what I understand after the game the coaches midwives let Pat Mahomes and other players know, that the coach dropped a 57 Chevy but was otherwise okay.
Brown, don't hurt Matilda this time. I'm sure she didn't attempt to block your thread. Remember that time with a cream whipper. All that happened is that she wound up in the hospital and you wound up in jail.
Rusty Craplace . Wrote:
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> Brown, don't hurt Matilda this time. I'm sure she
> didn't attempt to block your thread. Remember
> that time with a cream whipper. All that happened
> is that she wound up in the hospital and you wound
> up in jail.
Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last night.
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why
> 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and
> 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> night.
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why
> 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and
> 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> night.
Poopy Fartz is very sad for 5am guy's loss. Poopy Fartz wants to do something nice for 5am guy. Poopy Fartz wants to invite 5am guy over to watch some 'die hard' movies on DVD. Poopy Fartz and 5am guy can have Tortino's pizza rolls and Mike's hard Lemonaids. Poopy Fartz knows getting tipsy makes sadness go away.
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why
> 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and
> 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> night.
Good thing that ugly old bitch finally died. Lets celebrate!
This morning I made a big pot of grits and spread them out in a pan to cool. Later I cut the grits into squares and fried them in hot bacon grease. I served them to myself with a pound of crispy bacon and 6 fried eggs. My bowels can handle it!
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why
> 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and
> 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> night.
Terribly sorry 5 am. My bowels and I send our deepest respects.
Brown Onion Wrote:
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> 5am guy Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> > guys mother passed away last weekend. This is
> why
> > 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad
> and
> > 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> > sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> > night.
>
>
> Terribly sorry 5 am. My bowels and I send our
> deepest respects.
Attachments:
Rusty Craplace... Wrote:
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> We will be having a party at BO's house this
> evening to celebrate 5am guy's stupid ugly bitch
> of a mom finally dying.
>
> The usual fecal festivities will follow shortly
> after.
Poopy Fartz thinks this deserves nothing but the best. Poopy Fartz will bring Jagermeister and Hot pockets for the occasion. Poopy Fartz hopes the memorial tradition will continue. Poopy Fartz cannot wait for 5am guys's moving eulogy given while 5am guy is sitting on the groan throne doing what needs to be done. Brown Onion can give the midwives the night off.
It amazes me, the disrespect towards 5 am. He lost his mother. Can people please once show a little dignity? Even as I’m ready to have my toenails rip into the bathroom tiles my prayers are with 5 am.
Brown Onion Wrote:
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> It amazes me, the disrespect towards 5 am. He lost
> his mother. Can people please once show a little
> dignity? Even as I’m ready to have my toenails
> rip into the bathroom tiles my prayers are with 5
> am.
Mr potty mouth wants dignity with the poop talk he starts!
Here is a very dignified clip for you.
Attachments:
Brown Onion likes this content Wrote:
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> Brown Onion Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > It amazes me, the disrespect towards 5 am. He
> lost
> > his mother. Can people please once show a
> little
> > dignity? Even as I’m ready to have my
> toenails
> > rip into the bathroom tiles my prayers are with
> 5
> > am.
>
> Mr potty mouth wants dignity with the poop talk he
> starts!
>
> Here is a very dignified clip for you.
You’re a jerk. When you get old and your bowels betray you, you’ll understand.
Brown Onion Wrote:
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> Brown Onion likes this content Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Brown Onion Wrote:
> >
> --------------------------------------------------
>
> > -----
> > > It amazes me, the disrespect towards 5 am. He
> > lost
> > > his mother. Can people please once show a
> > little
> > > dignity? Even as I’m ready to have my
> > toenails
> > > rip into the bathroom tiles my prayers are
> with
> > 5
> > > am.
> >
> > Mr potty mouth wants dignity with the poop talk
> he
> > starts!
> >
> > Here is a very dignified clip for you.
>
>
> You’re a jerk. When you get old and your bowels
> betray you, you’ll understand.
I know a lots of people, young and old...None of them seem to be as obsessed with talking about shit as you are except Brian who likes to jerkoff in porta-potties. The aroma excites him. Maybe there is something to Jenkum.
Once you accept the abnormality of your fixation, you will be able to get help for it. Until then, you can't expect people to normalize your freakish desires.
I am calling out sick from work today. Roy Rogers opens in a half-hour and I am going to be there to get another double order of biscuits and gravy. My bowels are going to deal with it.
Pancho Villa Wrote:
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> I haven’t been to Tippys Taco since before Covid
> and my bowels have really improved. Should I go to
> Tippys Taco for lunch today?
Do they have taco Tuesday? If so I would wait until tomorrow.
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> guys mother passed away last weekend. This is why
> 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad and
> 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> night.
I think your mother would be glad you took a break from the shit fetish thread even if just for a week. For comfort imagine she is squatting from the clouds above dropping a heavenly loaf of naughty/delicious on you. Close your eyes and imagine that.
Heavenly Loaf Onion Wrote:
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> 5am guy Wrote:
> --------------------------------------------------
> -----
> > Hi all! 5am guy checking in early tonight. 5am
> > guys mother passed away last weekend. This is
> why
> > 5am guy has not been posting. 5am guy is sad
> and
> > 5am guy is having bowel trouble because of his
> > sadness. 5am guy just came back to work last
> > night.
>
> I think your mother would be glad you took a break
> from the shit fetish thread even if just for a
> week. For comfort imagine she is squatting from
> the clouds above dropping a heavenly loaf of
> naughty/delicious on you. Close your eyes and
> imagine that.
>
> God bless.
Al Bundy: Dad used to say, "Rain is the sound of angels flushing."
Attachments:
I went to the store and got three "Cowboy cut" Ribeye steaks 3 inches thick. I am going to grill those later an smother them in cooked onions and mushrooms. They will go good with a big serving of mashed potatoes with beef gravy. We will see if I can finish all three steaks!
boiled onion Wrote:
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> I went to the store and got three "Cowboy cut"
> Ribeye steaks 3 inches thick. I am going to grill
> those later an smother them in cooked onions and
> mushrooms. They will go good with a big serving of
> mashed potatoes with beef gravy. We will see if I
> can finish all three steaks!
Talk about weapons of ass destruction! How about a nice salad and a boneless chicken breast instead?
Hi all! 5am guy checking in a little early tonight. 5am guy is still pretty sad about losing his Mom. 5am guys Mom lived to be 84 and she had a really good life though and 5am guy is trying to keep that in mind.
5am guy had some Uncle bens chili in the microwavable pouch earlier and it is causing 5am guy to have some digestive issues. 5am guy does not recommend the Uncle Ben microwavable pouch chili.
5am guy Wrote:
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> Hi all! 5am guy checking in a little early
> tonight. 5am guy is still pretty sad about losing
> his Mom. 5am guys Mom lived to be 84 and she had a
> really good life though and 5am guy is trying to
> keep that in mind.
> 5am guy had some Uncle bens chili in the
> microwavable pouch earlier and it is causing 5am
> guy to have some digestive issues. 5am guy does
> not recommend the Uncle Ben microwavable pouch
> chili.
From my heart from my bowels 5 am. Praying for you during this time. Of grief. That is a good age but still so tough and grieving can accidentally make us eat foods that can destroy our bowels. I wish you well. Your bowels too.
When I get home I am going to order the two new pizzas that Dominoes is selling, one chicken taco pizza and one cheeseburger pizza. We will see how that goes.
boiled onion Wrote:
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> I sure do like those Jimmy Dean microwave
> breakfast bowls. I just had 4 of them for
> breakfast.
Maybe tomorrow you should try a half of a grapefruit and some whole grain cereal instead. Your bowels would just love that!
With the nice weather I decided to cook bratwursts on the charcoal grill. I'm going to make four of them and top them with cooked red pepper and sweet onion strips plus some shredded cheese. I got some Martins potato rolls and a bag of tater-tots. My bowels should be able to handle this!
boiled onion Wrote:
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> With the nice weather I decided to cook bratwursts
> on the charcoal grill. I'm going to make four of
> them and top them with cooked red pepper and sweet
> onion strips plus some shredded cheese. I got some
> Martins potato rolls and a bag of tater-tots. My
> bowels should be able to handle this!
Without being judgmental I think that is slightly excessive.