Eesh did it Wrote:
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> Eesh wears a buttplug and has relations with
> gerbils
William, you are projecting again. We know you want to have intimate relations with eesh, but think about how that will affect others. Your poor mother Sharon Moreno is terribly hurt by your interest in eesh's sphincter. She feels that the anal sex you have with her creates a special bond, and when you obsess over eesh's asshole, she fears you may be thinking of eesh when you rub your tiny nub in her slimy starfish.
Your felon roommate Christopher J. Tator is also heartbroken to know you fantasize about sexual acts involving eesh, especially after he drove your car all the way to Richmond to trespass in eesh's backyard and peer in his window. If you keep obsessing over eesh's butthole, Chris will feel rejected and make things very uncomfortable for you on that filthy bare mattress you share with him.
William, listen to your therapists and try to get over your obsession with eesh's body parts. Now that Lizzie is in jail, one except you cares about eesh's asshole or his dick for that matter. Now if you stick a gerbil or weasel up your own ass, perhaps we would be interested. Better yet, to celebrate the New Year, how about you stick an M-80 or two up your poop chute and enjoy the blast.
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